My Everything
by starrygirlb
Summary: A third and final installment, following up The Things Which Determine Our Fate and The Safety of Love. A Gadge love story for all of us who love a love story.
1. Chapter 1

** A/N: Welcome, welcome! Okay, before we get started with the good stuff, let me get a few things out of the way. First and foremost, gotta give a disclaimer: I am not the owner of The Hunger Games and all credit for that is to Suzanne Collins for the characters she so wonderfully created. The only thing I own are my own ideas and few original characters. **

**Secondly, this is the third and final installment. If you haven't read my other two stories, this one may not make much sense. I recommend reading The Things Which Determine Our Fate and then The Safety of Love before reading this one. It is a Gadge love story and at this point not really canon at all anymore. I tend to get a little excited about posting new chapters and fail to proofread my work sometimes but if you can overlook that I'm positive you'll enjoy this story! **

**And now, without further ado, I give you My Everything!**

**Chapter 1**

(Madge POV)

How dare he do this! Does he find it funny? Am I nothing but a huge joke to him? Did his stupid friends dare him to do this to me? I mean, he's always been short with me, never once friendly, but this is really low of him. Gale Hawthorne making a mockery of my current state to tell me I've somehow forgotten an entire year of my life. For a split second I almost believed him. Almost thought he was about to provide me with the answers to all my questions but of course he wasn't. He was only playing some kind of cruel prank. He left without so much as a single explanation or clue as to what was going on supposedly over the last year. Katniss would be furious at him if she knew. She never let him get away with his snarky comments about my wealth or about me being the mayors daughter. She'd really kill him for this one. I doubt I'll mention it though. Too embarrassing. I mean, what would I say about it? That I woke up to find Gale Hawthorne of all people holding my hand? That he smiled at me and then proceeded to tell me he'd been waiting for me to wake up so he could fill me in on the events of the past year? It doesn't even sound plausible. No, Gale Hawthorne has never for a moment taken any interest in me and all this had to have been some cruel joke of his. Some way for him to make fun of me for being so confused right now.

When he left the room I was so angry that I threw my water glass across the room, hitting the concrete wall, shattering glass all over the floor. Hot, angry tears filled my eyes but I knew it was wrong of me to break the glass and I should have had better manners. I make a mental note to have my father pay for the glass I broke as I struggle to climb out of bed. I've got to clean that glass up before someone comes in and sees it. It would just add to my embarrassment for anyone to know at I'd let Gale Hawthorne get me to lose my temper. As my feet hit the cold, concrete floor my head spins a little again but not nearly as bad as earlier. This time I don't faint or fall down. I just have to move slowly. I make my way over to the glass, dragging my bag of fluids with me and begin to pick up the larger pieces first. I take them over to the small, metal wastebasket by the door and drop them in it. Another wave of dizziness comes over me and I have to lean my forehead and palms against the wall to steady myself. After a moment, I make my way back over to the remaining bits of glass and try to figure out the best way to clean it up. The pieces are too small to be easily picked up with just my fingers. Without a broom and dust pan, I have no idea what to do but I don't want to just leave it like this. This room is practically bare but there is a pillowcase on my pillow. I could use that over my hand and sort of wipe up what's left. It wont be as efficient as a dust pan but it'll have to do. And it does. After I sort of wipe up everything, I shake the pillowcase out into the wastebasket and then place the pillowcase on the cabinet so it can be laundered.

Im making my way back to the bed when I remember that I still need to look in the mirror and I may as well get it over with while I'm up. I slowly make my way over to the mirror and take a deep breath before stepping in front of it. And then I gasp audibly and bring my hand to my mouth. I'm hideous! A puffy, somewhat healed cut, or rather multiple cuts, cover my forehead and one of my cheeks. On top of that, I have a bandage on my head. With trembling fingers I reach up and lift back the bandage only to reveal a row of bloody stitches where a small patch of hair has been shaved off. I guess this is where I was hit. This is the reason everything isn't making sense right now. I also notice that my face seems pink. Like I spent too much time outside in the sun. And I seem thinner. But what is all this a result of? It doesn't make sense. Nothing makes sense. A surge of annoyance, bordering on rage boils up inside me. I need answers and I'm tired of waiting for them. The next person to come in this room isn't getting to leave without telling me something, anything that will make sense.

I get back in bed and doze off for awhile again. I can't seem to shake the exhaustion I feel. At some point while I'm asleep the medic must ahve returned because my fluids bag is gone as well as the tubes in my arm. I must have slept right through all of it. When I wake up, Katniss is sitting in the chair waiting for me.

"Hey, you could have woken me up. I hope you weren't waiting long." I yawn and smile.

"You need your rest. Didn't want to disturb you." She shrugs in her ever casual way.

"Did you find out they father knows I'm here? I'm finished getting those fluids so I can probably go home soon. Is he coming to get me?"

"He won't be coming to get you Madge." She tells me quietly. She won't look at me and her fingers are making little circles on the edge of my bed.

"Oh, don't let that worry you." I laugh. "He's probably just busy. He's always busy these days. If you call my house I'm sure Mabel will come for me."

"No, you don't understand. Madge, I'm about to tell you something and you won't want to hear it but I have to tell you. Your father and Mabel aren't in 12 or in 13 for that matter. They're both Capitol prisoners. They have been for quite some time now."

"What?" I ask in horror. Capitol prison? There must be some mistake!

"I know it seems impossible and I can't imagine how difficult it is to hear but it is the truth. You knew it yourself before your head injury."

"Katniss, how much time have I forgotten?" I ask her as stinging tears glide down my face. I don't know if I can handle what e answer will be but I need to know and I have to ask now.

"I'm not sure exactly. Seems like almost a year." Her voice is quiet and she still isn't looking at me. This is the same thing Gale said but how can that be? How do you just forget a year of your own life? What in the hell happened to me?

"Please, you have to tell me what happened to me." I choke out through my sobs.

"You were in the games. The Quarter Quell. A mission was put into action to rescue you from the arena. When it was time to get you out, you resisted and had to be knocked unconscious. That knock on the head is why you've lost pieces of your memory. The medics think it'll all come back though, that it's a temporary problem."

I sit, sobbing to myself as my damaged mind works to comprehend the words Katniss just spoke to me. I was in the games. I was forcefully removed from them. My father and Mabel are prisoners. Katniss just sits, waits for me to speak again.

"Why would I resist being rescued?"

"You weren't aware of the plan. You got paranoid and tried to run away. Johanna Mason had to act fast because the window for your rescue was so small and she did what she needed to do. Hit you hard in the head and then carried you to the rescue site."

"Johanna Mason? But she..."

"Victors were included in the reaping as part of the Quell twist." she interrupts, already able to know what I was about to argue.

"And my father? He's in prison? Why?"

She sighs a little, eyes still down on the blanket of my bed. "It's sort of a really long and complicated story. Something to do with your mother. It would probably be better explained by someone who was alongside you from the being of all of it."

"I have no idea what that means. Alongside me for what?" I ask as I feel my frustrations start to grow again.

"It's just that I wasn't even home from my games when everything began to unravel. A lot took place without me around. You should really let Gale be the one to get into all those details."

"Gale? Why would Gale know anything about it?"

"Because Gale and you became close while I was away in my games and a relationship developed. And later, after I got back home, you two were married. Gale's your husband Madge."

I stare at her with eyes the size of saucers, mouth hanging open. I feel lightheaded again, this time from the impact of of the newest bomb to drop on me. I close my mouth and eyes, resting my head back on my pillows. Married! I'm freaking married! At 17! And to Gale Hawthorne of all people! Gale Hawthorne! I don't even know know how to process this.

"Are you okay? Madge?" Katniss asks, concern flooding her voice.

"I think I just need a little time to process this all. It's sort of a lot to take in." I tell her through closed eyes that still drip tears.

"I know it is. I'll come back and check on you later. Try to rest, okay?" She says softly, almost sadly as she exits the room. I never do open my eyes to watch her go. I only know she leaves based on the sound of her footsteps against the concrete floor.

(Gale POV)

"Here kiddo. You look like you could use a little of this." Haymitch says as he shoves a flask into my hand. Without hesitating, I open it and take a swig. Moonshine. Burns all the way down my throat. I take a second, heftier swig before handing it back to him. I wipe my eyes and look at him.

"Gotta give her time. She'll come around. Katniss is in with her now, she'll tell her some basics, get the ball rolling so to speak. You can fill in all the details for her later."

"She doesn't even know me. She doesn't even think we're friends much less married." I tell him glumly.

"Nope. But hang in there. She'll be discharged from medical in a little while. They'll bring her up to your unit for her to get settled in."

"They expect her to stay with me even though she doesn't know me as her husband?" I ask in shock. Can't they give her a unit alone until her memory comes back or at least until she gets more comfortable with the idea of her and I as a couple?

"That's the way it works around here Kiddo." He explains. "Might wanna get on back up there so she doesn't have to come home to an empty place."

I nod wearily and head towards the elevators. I intend to go on back to our unit and wait for her but I find my fingers pushing the button for level 6 instead. I need to talk to my mother. I need to see if she could possibly have any advice on this at all. Once on their floor, I follow the narrow hallways until I locate their unit. I knock and wait for an answer. I don't have a code for they keypad so I can't just go inside like I would back at home.

"Gale? Are you okay? What's wrong?" My mother asks immediately when she sees my face.

"She doesn't remember me, Ma. She can't remember anything about us or the past year." I manage to tell her without breaking down completely.

"Have you been drinking?" She whispers leaning in close and inhaling.

"Did you hear what I just said? She doesn't know me anymore!" I say more urgently, tears filling my eyes. I ignore the question about my drinking. Right now, that isn't important.

"You aren't making any sense Gale. Come inside and lets sit down. We'll talk about it."

I follow her into their unit which is much more spacious than mine is but still small. They have a split unit which means there are two rooms connected in the middle with a small bathroom. When you enter, it's one of the bedrooms. To get to the other one, you have to go through the bathroom. No windows. Same dull, bland grey and white palate.

"Where are the kids?" I ask her, noticing their absence and not wanting to talk about this in front of them.

"Mrs. Krull took them upstairs for dinner. I wasn't hungry. Wanted to get situated down here and let all of this sink in. This is all quite a lot to swallow in one day."

"Oh."

"You were saying? About Madge? What doesn't she remember about you two?"

"She was knocked out during the rescue and it made her lose parts of her memory. I went to see her. She talked to me like she used to, back before we were ever friends. And when I tried to hold her hand, she pulled away from me. Ma, she had no idea we were together. What am I going to do?"

"Oh Gale, that's awful! I'm so sorry." She says and she hugs me. I fall into her, letting her console me even though I'm too old for it.

"I don't know what to do now. Ma, she is absolutely everything to me and I need her."

"Gale, she fell in love with you once, she'll do it again."

"Ma, she doesn't even think we're friends. She doesn't remember helping Rory or going into the woods to the lake or marrying me." I remind her, doubting I could make Madge love me again. As I speak, another sob escapes me and I bury my face in my hands.

"Gale, you can't fall apart. You'll need to be stronger than ever right now. Madge is likely very scared and she'll need you to be there for her as she sorts all this out and makes sense of it all."

"I'm not sure I know how to do that."

"Gale, I watched you two fall head over heels in love, battle through impossible circumstances and triumph together in love. If anyone can get through a little memory loss, it's you two." She encourages as she gently wipes the tears from my cheek.

I take a deep breath and stand up. I need to get back to my unit before Madge is brought up from the Medical Center. I have no idea how I'll do this. How I'll ever manage to earn her love again, but I know I'll try. With everything I have, I'll try to get her to remember and to love me again.

"Tell Posy I came by to say hi but that I had to go back and check on Madge. I don't think we should tell them about her memory yet. Maybe Rory, but not Vick and Posy."

"Of course. I'll just tell them she's resting for now. We'll figure out the rest as we go along." She agrees.

On the walk back to my unit, I pass a few other people in the halls. Everyone is dressed in grey clothes. Plain and simple, nothing fancy or flashy. I have no idea why we all have to wear the same thing here but I suppose the manual will tell me if I ever take the time to really, thoroughly read it. So far all I've done is skim through it. Actually, I've got quite a bit of learning to do when it comes to this place. It's all so foreign.

Once I'm back in the unit, I wash my face so it won't show so much that I've been crying. I don't want her to know that I'm falling apart over this. I think my mother is right when she says I need to be strong for Madge right now. I can't imagine how this must all feel for her, how much this all is for her to have dumped on her. I mean, what's it like to wake up in a strange place and be told that you've forgotten a whole year of your life practically? I've just washed up when I hear a knock at the door. I look at myself in the mirror one last time and give myself a quick, silent pep talk. Alright Hawthorne, this is it. You have to win her love all over again.

I open the door and find Madge with some sort of escort person. He hands me a small bag with medicines in it and instructs us to contact the Medical Center if we have any questions or if Madge starts to feel worse. And then he's gone. Leaving just me and Madge. Alone in our new home. Just us. I step aside so she can come inside and she does, but with obvious hesitation. I shut the door behind us and turn to see her, eyes scanning the room.

"It's so small." Her hushed voice nearly whispers.

"Yeah, it's um, simple." I say as awkwardly as possible. I have no idea what to say to her. I want to grab her, pull her to me and kiss her like I never have before. Want to touch her, feel her because she doesn't seem real to me. But I can't. She doesn't think of me as a husband. I don't want to make her any more uncomfortable than she already is.

She sits down on the edge of the bed, biting her bottom lip, staring down at her hands in her lap. I put the medicine down on the nightstand and sit down on the floor. I'm afraid if I sit on the bed she'll pull away from me and I don't think I can handle that.

"So, I guess you probably have a few questions you want answered, huh?" I finally say, breaking the silent tension that seems to be building.

"More than a few."

"I...I can try and answer them for you. If you want me too."

She's quiet for a moment, her eyes searching my face before she speaks. "I could really use some answers."

I nod in understanding and wait for her to find a way to begin. I can see that she isn't comfortable talking to me and I know it's because she doesn't know me. I was such an ass to her back before Katniss's games that it's totally understandable for her to not know if she can trust me.

"Um, Katniss told me that you and I, um, well, that we got to know each other a little during her games and I was wondering if you could tell me how exactly that happened? I mean, it's just that from what I remember, you and I weren't exactly friends so I can't imagine us as such."

"That's probably a pretty good place to start. It'l help everything else make sense a little more." I begin. "Do you remember your garden?"

She wrinkles her brow for a second and then she nods. "I remember being excited that I was getting a garden. But I didn't have it yet."

"Okay, good. Well, Mabel hired my friend Thom and I to clear the land behind your house and help you get everything ready for the garden. That was really the first day that you and I talked. You helped me with a problem."

"I helped you? How?"

"Well, it was after we were done clearing the land and we had this big pile of stuff to burn. Thom went on home and you and I sat out all night watching the fire. Your father, he was away on a trip and well, when he was away, the fence was always turned on. Well, the day before that, Rory, he's my brother, had gone out into the woods to look for me and then the fence turned on and he got trapped out there. That night, as we sat by the fire, you found out Rory was stuck out there and you offered to help. You told me you knew how to turn off the fence. And then the next day, you skipped school and turned off the fence so I could go rescue Rory before the mandatory viewing."

She stares at me in disbelief, mouth slightly hanging open. "I turned off the fence? And I skipped school?"

"Yeah, crazy, huh?" I say giving her a slight smile.

She nods, mouth still agape. "And then what happened? Did we become friends because of that?"

"Well, sort of. It's hard to explain in words what really happened after that. For me, it was like the first time I got to see that side of you. The side of you that you never usually let people see. I guess you could say that I was very intrigued. We spent a little time together and just kind of became a couple. It all happened pretty fast."

"So you became attracted to me because I turned off the fence for you?"

I shake my head. "No, I was already attracted to you, I already thought you were flat out gorgeous. But I never realized until then that there was so much more to you than I'd given you credit for. See, I never saw you as anything other than the rich daughter of the Mayor. I never took the time to get to know you before that."

"You think I'm gorgeous?" And again her mouth falls open.

I laugh even though I try hard not too. I guess, as far as she remembers, this is the first time she's heard me say it so it would be shocking to her.

"It's not funny!" She lashes out at me, pulling my laughter to halt.

"Hey, I'm sorry. I wasn't laughing at you. It's just that I can't imagine you not knowing how beautiful I think you are. I, I'm sorry I upset you." I apologize. I can't believe I just upset her. Can't believe she'd think I would laugh at her. I want to hug her, make sure she knows I didn't mean it like that but I can't do it.

She folds her arms over her chest but her shoulders drop a bit so I think she's relaxing a little.

"Is there anything else you want to know?" I ask. Obviously, I'm sure there is but I don't know what exactly she wants to know right now.

"Why are we married?"

"What?" I startle not understanding her question right away.

She sighs. "What I mean, is I'm only 17. That's awfully young to be married. I just wondered if there was a reason for it. Like, um, if we had to get married or something." She rephrases for me and her cheeks blush bright pink.

Pregnant. She wants to know if we got married because she was pregnant. "No, we didn't have to. You weren't pregnant or anything."

I see her relax a little more but her cheeks stay bright pink. "Well, was there another reason?"

"Yes and no. Above all, aside from everything else, we got married because we love each other more than anything. But we got married sooner than we would have normally because you were going to be reaped. You wanted a chance to be married, to be a wife, before you had to go into the games."

"I knew I was getting reaped before it happened?"

"Yeah, that's kind of a complicated story. And kind of a long one at that."

"It seems like everything is complicated. I don't think I've ever been more overwhelmed in my entire life." She sighs and rubs her forehead.

"Does your head hurt? Want me to get some of your medicine?" I ask, springing to my feet.

"Headache." She informs me as she closes her eyes and keeps rubbing her temple.

"Here, it says to take this if your head hurts." I say handing her one of the blue pills from the bag the medic sent. I get her a glass of water from the bathroom sink to take it with. She takes it and swallows it. I can't help myself and I reach out to stroke her face. My touch startles her and she pulls away, eyes flashing fear.

"Sorry." I mumble and take a step back.

"I think I'm going to try and rest." She says and looks down at the floor. Her cheeks are red. I've definitely made her uncomfortable. With just one brush of my hand on her cheek, I've made her pull away from me.

"Yeah, sure. I'll take the floor, you take the bed." I tell her, not making eye contact. I grab a pillow off the bed and flip the lights off. She doesn't speak again and it's dark so I can't see her but I hear her as she climbs under the blanket and gets situated in bed. The concrete is hard and cold and I know I won't sleep tonight. I'll have to see if I can get an extra blanket tomorrow. I took the floor because I know the thought of sharing a bed with me would really send her into a panic right now. And I don't want that, I just want her to be comfortable. I want her to feel safe around me. Want her to trust me. And more than anything, I just need her to love me again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

(Madge POV)

When I wake up the next morning, I hear the shower running and assume it must be Gale. I'd had a difficult time falling asleep at first last night but once I did, I slept all night. I think there may be something in that blue pill I took for my headache that causes drowsiness because even now, after a solid night's sleep, I feel groggy. My headache is gone though.

I sigh, thinking back to what transpired between Gale and I last night before bed. He was doing the one thing I've been practically begging someone to do ever since I first woke up in the Medical Center. He was answering my questions. And giving me fully honest answers at that. I should have thanked him. Should have shown even a hint of gratitude. But I didn't. Nope. All I did was manage to get snippy when he laughed and get myself all emotionally worked up. And it is just plain strange sitting and having deep conversation with Gale Hawthorne. When I'd told him I wanted to go to sleep, I was nervous that he would climb in bed alongside me but thankfully, he didn't. I do feel guilty for him having to sleep on the cold, hard floor with no blanket but I just couldn't bring myself to share a bed with him. I can barely converse with the boy, much less sleep next to him all night under a shared blanket. Married. We are married. I just can't understand how that happened. I mean, I know what he told me. How he explained it all. But somehow, in this damaged mind of mine, I just can't see it happening. Can't see us holding hands or kissing. Can't imagine us doing other things married people would do. Gale Hawthorne has seen me naked. Naked! A feeling of embarrassment washes over me at the thought of all this and instinctively, I pull my knees up to my chest and hug my arms around them.

If I ignore what everyone says happened over the past year and only focus on what I actually can remember, I feel inexperienced. All my life, I've been single. Never had a boy ask me out on a date. Never even really had a close friend who was a boy. Never been kissed, never known what it feels like to get a present or even a hug from a boy. And I'm supposed to make the leap from that to being married? I close my eyes and shake my head slightly to myself. I don't know how to make that happen. I just don't.

I hear the shower water turn off and the knowledge that Gale will soon reappear before me sends a flutter of butterflies through my stomach. I contemplate pretending to be asleep still but before I can decide, the bathroom door opens and Gale steps into view.

"Morning." He greets me. His eyes flash of undeniable hope as he looks at me. I look away, not wanting to also see the disappointment I knew would follow as soon as he realized I still didn't remember him as my husband.

"Good morning." I mutter quietly as I fiddle with the stitching on my blanket.

"Did you sleep alright?" He asks as he sits in the chair and begins to put on his shoes.

"I did, thank you. I appreciate you letting me have the bed." I offer up, knowing I should have said thank you yesterday.

He shrugs as if to tell me it was nothing and keeps his eyes on his hands as they tie up his shoelaces. There's a very awkward silence and I feel like I should make conversation but I have no idea what to talk to him about. And I have a feeling he hasn't a clue what to chat about with me either based off our mutual silence. Thankfully, a knock at the door lightens the feel of the room. Gale goes to answer the door and I don't see who it is but they give him two papers and leave.

"Itineraries." He says holding them up for me to see.

"Itineraries?" I question as I raise an eyebrow.

"Yeah. They do that here I guess. Let's us know where we're supposed to be when, you know?"

"Well, let's see what we're doing then." I say holding out my hand to take my copy. I hadn't realized that we would have schedules to follow but since I have no inkling of what my life is like at the moment, I guess it's for the best that I have a schedule to lay out my day for me.

"We're supposed to go to breakfast at 8:00. That's in 20 minutes. Then we each have our own appointments. Looks like I've got task orientation all morning." He says as he reads over the papers.

"And I have to go back to the Medical Center. Doesn't say why though."

"They probably just want to check you out, make sure you're feeling alright."

"I guess so. Um, I want to take a shower but I don't know where my things are."

"You don't really have much stuff. Bringing us here was challenging and adding luggage would have made it all the more difficult. There's soap and shampoo in the shower. And we're all supposed to wear these grey outfits. Everyone wears them but I'm not sure what the reason for that is."

"Oh." I say as I think about the reality of all my worldly possessions being gone. I don't care about the clothes or jewelry or anything like that but it feels so empty to think that all I own right now is a simple grey top and pants, a bar of soap and some shampoo. I climb out of bed and head for the bathroom. If we are expected to be at breakfast in 20 minutes, I'll have to hurry. In the bathroom, I take a quick shower being careful not to get my stitches wet as I wash my hair. The stream of water doesn't hold much pressure, which makes it easier to be cautious. The water is also bordering on cold, barely qualifying as being lukewarm. And it's just a shower stall. No bathtub like I have at home. I'd give anything to be at home, in my house, the one I grew up in, where I could soak leisurely in my tub with water that's warm and relaxing. After I get out, I dry off with a towel and dress in the standard outfit. I avoid looking in the small mirror over the sink because I don't want to see the wounds on my face or the stitches in my head again. Just having to see all the scrapes and bruises that cover my arms and legs is enough for me right now. I don't have a ribbon to tie my hair back with so I just leave it down. Maybe I can find a band or clip later today and figure out a way to style my hair that'll conceal the stitches and cover where they had to shave my scalp.

When I come out of the bathroom, I find Gale has made the bed and is waiting patiently for me.

"Feel better now that you got a shower?"

"I guess. A bath would've been better. At home I always prefer to use my bathtub." As soon as I say it, I regret it. You don't have a bathtub because you don't live in the Mayor's house anymore, I scold myself. I assume Gale and I live in the Seam. I should know this.

Gale's face falls a little and he doesn't say anything about my slip up. Just gives me a tiny smile and takes a deep breath. "Ready to go?"

"If you are. Lead the way."

I follow behind him as he leads us down a few hallways and to an elevator. He punches a few buttons on a keypad and we head upwards, the elevator stopping along the way and a few more people getting on before we continue. I keep my face turned towards the floor both out of embarrassment over my wounds as well as nervousness over all these new and unknown surroundings. As I'm looking down, I notice Gale's hand move towards me a bit and then retract and his fists ball up. It seems like he may be wanting to hold onto me but is fighting off the urge. And I'm glad he's resisting because I'm just not ready for that yet.

Once we arrive on the level where the cafeteria is, we follow behind everyone else into a large windowless room lined with tables. Up at the front of the room is a wall with a large window-like cutout where everyone is handed a tray of food. The room is buzzing with activity. People talking amongst other members of their tables and laughing. My stomach rumbles at the smell of food and it's only now that I realize just how hungry I am. Gale and I get in line and wait our turn. While were waiting, I'm lost in thought as I watch all the people of the room when all of a sudden I hear my name cried out and see a small, dark haired girl bounding towards me, frantically waving her hands at me. I take a step back initially, not sure what to do because I don't know who she is or how she knows me. Just seconds before she reaches me though, Gale whispers "It's my little sister Posy. She's your biggest fan."

I nod to him. That makes sense. I knew he had a sister I think but I don't know if I met her. Wait, that's not true. I did meet her. At a viewing with Prim,I think. She was eating strawberries and had sticky hands. The memory seems so foggy but I feel like it should have been just the other day though in reality it was probably almost a year ago. The girl reaches me, throwing her arms around my legs, obviously delighted to see me.

Gale reaches down and swoops her up in his arms. "Hey Pose, how about a hello for your favorite brother too, huh?" He teases her and kisses her forehead. She gives him a toothy smile and a giggle but twists around in his arms and reaches for me, arms wiggling for me to take her. Gale tries to stop her. "Hey Posy, Madge is a little tired still. Maybe she can play with you later, okay?"

"No, it's okay. I'll hold her." I tell him softly as I reach my own arms out and take the little girl from him. It feels strange but she's just a small child. This I should be able to manage. He looks at me and I can't figure out what emotion is in his eyes before the little girl demands my attention.

"I have to tell you something." She says, her face suddenly extremely serious.

"Okay, go ahead."

"I broke your perfume on the floor. I'm sorry." She confesses and her little dark eyes brim with tears that look as if they may pour down her cheeks at any moment. Perfume? She broke my perfume bottle? Well that's no big deal. Not to me anyway. It was just Capitol stuff anyway, nothing I picked out myself. She looks like it's weighing heavily on her though so I do what feels natural and give her light squeeze of a hug along with a smile.

"That's okay. Don't worry about it."

Her eyes get bigger and she lights up. "You're not mad at me?"

"Of course not. I'm sure it was an accident. Accidents happen all the time."

She turns and gives Gale a big grin. "See, it's okay. You didn't havta be mad at me bout it!"

"I already told you I wasn't mad. But you weren't supposed to be touching Madge's things and you know it."

She turns back to face me and whispers loudly "He yelled at me bout it."

"You yelled at her?" I ask in shock. She's so tiny I can't imagine yelling at her. Especially over something so trivial that must have been an accident.

He sighs and looks annoyed slightly at Posy tattling on him. "Didn't mean to yell. She caught me off guard and I was a little on edge. It was while you were in the games." He explains then adds, "I already apologized to her." And then he shoots Posy a look.

The little girl in my arms looks at my face and reaches up with her petite hand and runs her fingers over my healing cuts. It's makes me self conscious but I try to remind myself that all children tend to be curious and that's all she is. Simply curious. But it also makes me think that everyone is looking at me and becoming curious about what happened to me. Hopefully the scars won't be too bad.

"Is your boo boo getting better?"

"Posy! Leave Madge alone." Gale answers her before I can even get a word out. He seems like he's being very protective of me, not wanting her to bother me. She looks at him, giving him a face that makes me want to laugh. This little girl is quite the spitfire and most definitely related to the Gale Hawthorne that I remember! Watching someone so tiny dish out attitude right back at Gale is pretty amusing I end up having to bite my lip to keep the laughter from slipping out.

"It's okay." I manage to say without laughter. "She's just curious."

"She should have better manners." He mumbles back at me and gives the girl a look of his own. She ignores him and turns her attention back to me.

"My dollies didn't get to move here with us."

"Aww, that's too bad. How many dollies did you have?" I ask her, a little surprised that a Seam child would have the luxury of a doll, much less multiple dolls.

"You know that, silly! I have 3!" She giggles as if I had been teasing when I asked her.

"You gave her your old dolls." Gale leans over to remind me quietly.

"Oh, right, of course." I say and I feel my cheeks blush with embarrassment. If I can't even carry on a conversation with a small child how in the world will I ever manage to fit in with people my age? I see Gale motion to a table and I follow his gaze to see his family sitting with the Everdeens. His brother nods back at him and comes over to us.

"C'mon Posy. Gale and Madge need to get their food and you need to come finish eating your own food." The boy, Rory I assume, tells her as he reaches for Posy.

"I wanna stay with Madge!" She pouts and clings tighter to me. I'm flattered but uncomfortable all at the same time.

"Nuh-uh. Ma already told you that you needed to finish your food, now come on. You can see Madge later." He tells her, refusing to bargain with her.

She starts to pitch a fit and I get more uncomfortable, not knowing if I should step in or even if I did, what I should be saying. Do I tell her it's okay to stay with me or do I encourage her to do as he told her or what? Gale steps in and pulls her from my arms, carries her back to the table and hands her over to their Mother. She has a tantrum the whole way there causing people at other tables to turn and stare at us, only furthering my discomfort. I look down to the floor, focus on my shoe and try to ignore my surroundings. Gale returns looking something of annoyed or frustrated.

"Sorry. She's kinda going through a phase right now and she can pitch a fit with the best of them when she doesn't get her way." He apologizes as he runs his hand through his hair.

I halfway nod in reply and then thankfully, the line moves forward and we're suddenly at the head of the line. This keeps us from having to have conversation as we now collect our food trays. Once we have our trays in hand though, we have to go find seats. I assume he'll want us to sit with his family but I really wish I didn't have too. It isn't that I have a problem with them or anything, I just don't know them and it feels so awkward. Personally, I'd like to go find a table alone. Just me, no one else. Not even him.

"Do you, um, want to sit with my family? We don't have too. I know it might be weird for you right now and all." He asks hesitantly.

"May as well get it over with." I mutter and head towards them. I already made him sleep on the cold, concrete floor all night. The least I can do is allow him to enjoy a meal with his family.

He looks at me and there's such a sadness haunting his eyes that I have to look away. I begin walking towards the table and I know without checking that he'll follow behind me. Come on Madge, you can do this. You can hold up an illusion with the best of them, you've done it for years. Surely you can make small talk over breakfast with a handful of people.

I set my tray down next to Prim and Rory and across from Katniss. At least I know the Everdeens. Well, mostly just Katniss but Prim a little. Gale takes a seat next to me.

"Hi Madge."

"Good morning Prim." I say and give her a smile. I look down at my breakfast tray and see that I have some sort of porridge or oatmeal, a handful of raisins and walnuts and a glass of water. Not exactly the Belgian waffles and whipped cream that Mabel would have made me had I been at home but I feel so hungry that I really don't mind. I try to keep food in my mouth to avoid having to talk but my mere presence at the table seems to have everyone acting funny. Like they don't know what to say anymore than I do. Mostly it's just slightly forced small talk about nothing specific. When breakfast is over, everyone disburses to their assigned places saying hurried goodbyes as they scatter off. I guess I need to head over to the Medical Center. I look over at Gale and Katniss, the only two remaining people, apparently waiting on me.

"I should get going. I'll catch up with you later." I say through one of my illusion smiles. Perhaps if they think I'm happy and doing fine they won't worry about me or look so sad. When they do that, it just makes me feel guilty. I turn and begin heading off without waiting for much of a response and Gale calls out after me.

"Want me to walk you to the Medical Center?"

"No, I'm fine. You have your own places to be." I call back over my shoulder. I avoid making eye contact.

Once I finally find the Medical Center, after a few wrong turns that is, I check in at a desk with a woman who checks for my name on a list only to have to flip several pages before finally locating it apparently and she tells me to have a seat, that someone will be out for me momentarily.

"Mrs. Hawthorne? I'm Dr. Castillion, please come with me." A man with salt and pepper hair and silver wire-rimmed glasses tells me. Hearing my name said like that sounds so foreign. Mrs. Hawthorne? Doesn't even feel right. The it occurs to me why the woman at the desk couldn't locate my name on her list at first. I'd given her the name of Madge Undersee, not Madge Hawthorne. Didn't even occur to me. Geez, I can't even get my own name correct. This is ridiculous. I follow him to a small room which I assume must be his office. There's a file cabinet and desk and two chairs. And not much else. Apparently, in 13, less is more. So far everything I've seen is sparse, dull and cold.

"I wanted to meet with you this morning because I'll be the Doctor overseeing your recovery. I'd like to establish some baselines on you and then we'll meet each week or so to chart your progress."

"So you think I'll make a full recovery? That I could regain my memory?" I ask hopefully. Please say yes, I think in my head, please say yes.

"I don't see anything on your initial intake stats that would indicate this to be permanent. We'll have you meet with therapists who will lead you through activities meant to spark and awaken your memories. If need be, I may prescribe medicines or treatments along the way. Our ultimate goal is for you to have a full recovery."

"Okay, well, where do we start?" I ask eagerly, ready to get going. The sooner I start treatments, the sooner I might have my life back.

(Gale POV)

I can't sleep. All night I listen for her. Listen for the sound of her sleeping, breathing. It's the most amazing thing to have her alive and here with me but at the same time it isn't really her. Not my Madge. This Madge is nervous around me and pulls away if I touch her. My Madge isn't like that. My Madge likes to curl up against my chest and loves me. This Madge definitely doesn't love me and she sure as hell isn't curling up in my arms and resting her face against my chest. I'm not sure if this Madge even likes me. I can tell when she finally falls asleep. Her breathing evens out and that makes me relax a little. I try to think back to when we weren't a couple. Try to think of any interaction we had. It was minimal at best. Occasional passing by with Katniss where I usually made some sort of snarky remark to her if anything. She remembers planning to have a garden but not making it. What happened just before that that might help me to help her remember? Was there anything positive? After much thought, all I can come up with won't help me. The night in the meadow. The one with the infamous ruffled nightgown. That was before the garden was cleared so she probably remembers it but not in the same way that I do. All she'll remember is that I snapped at her for trying to help me, made her cry and caused her to lock herself out of the house. She won't know what I later confessed about that night. She won't know that I was snippy with her because of the dream I was having about kissing her. Won't know that the sight of her in that ruffled nightgown drove me crazy in a good way. Nope, she won't remember any of that. Why did I have to be such an ass to her? If I hadn't been, maybe if I'd even once bothered to be halfway decent to her she'd be just a little more comfortable around me now. It's my own fault.

When the clock tells me it's morning, I finally get up from the floor and head into the bathroom to shower. When I come out, she's awake, sitting up in bed with her knees pulled to her chest, blanket tucked around her. Part of me had hoped she'd wake up and remember me today but one glance at her leery blue eyes tells me it's false hope. In the elevators going to breakfast I have to fight back the urge to wrap my arm around her and pull her to me. It's the most awful of feelings when she pulls away from my touch and that's the only thing giving me the control to fight that urge. It's like having my heartbreak over and over but I can't tell her that, have to try not to show it. At breakfast, things seemed to be going somewhat smoothly as I watched Madge hold Posy. This is good I thought. She's doing good. She's comfortable with Posy just like she always was. But it was short lived. Her lack of memory about the dolls she gave Posy seemed to fluster her and it was only furthered by the scene Posy made with her tantrum. Madge looked so uncomfortable and all I wanted to do was hug her close to me and comfort her. But how do you ease someone's discomfort when you yourself are part of it? And I figured she wouldn't want to sit with my family so I asked her, offering for us to sit alone and her response sent my heart right out of my chest. May as well get it over with. That's what she muttered. Get it over with? The Madge I know, the one I love and desperately miss, would never say that. She loved to spend time with my family, even before she really got to know them, that was something she enjoyed doing. So when I hear her say those words-get it over with-my heart just fell. I was about to tell her we'd sit somewhere else but she marched right over and sat on down with everyone. You could feel the tension during breakfast though. No one quite knew what to say so everything ended up feeling fake and forced. Stiff. And she had her illusion smile plastered across her face the whole time. Even when she left, she flashed it at me and Katniss, leaving saying she didn't want me to walk her to the Medical Center. Of course, she doesn't know that I can tell the difference between a real Madge smile and the illusion Madge smile. She has no idea we've ever talked about the difference. It's brutal having to watch your wife fake being happy. This is so frustrating and I feel like I don't have her back at all. And truthfully, I don't.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

(Gale POV)

"So I guess she's not doing that great?" Katniss comments after the two of us watch Madge dash off.

"I don't know. She let me explain how we became a couple and not a whole lot else. I think it's too overwhelming for her to get too much information in one sitting."

"I could imagine it would be." She agrees. "But what about you? You hanging in there?"

"Trying my hardest." I shrug with a sigh. "It's rough though because she doesn't know me, not now anyway. She just remembers how I was to her before your games. And she won't let me near her without flinching or pulling away."

Katniss nods. "Do you think she'll come around?"

"I don't know Catnip. Sometimes, I feel like she doesn't even like me. How in the hell will she ever be able to love me?"

"Hang in there. This will get better soon, it has too."

"Did you know about any of this? The rescue and escape to 13?" I ask her.

"Not a bit of it. Haymitch said I was too much of a risk. Was afraid I'd be held captive and tortured for information by the Capitol if anything went wrong with the plan. I was just as surprised as you."

"Are you glad?"

"Glad to have not known about it? I guess so considering it worked out for the most part. Glad to be in 13? Well, it's better than being under the watch of the Capitol for sure but I miss the sunshine, the woods, you know?"

"I wish Madge could have known. She wouldn't have been paranoid and tried to run off if she'd have known."

"Gale, you understand why they couldn't tell her anything, right?"

"I guess." I shrug.

"It would have been terrible for her to hold any information whatsoever. They would have done the cruelest things to her, tortured her repeatedly for information if the plan wasn't a success. And the plan was a long shot. We're lucky it worked."

"I just miss her so much. I can't even kiss her." I say, tears brimming up in my eyes. God, I hate crying. I haven't cried this much ever.

"Be patient. I know it's hard." She says as she reaches over and touches my arm gently. We aren't the huggy, touchy type of friends so this is a big thing for her to reach over in effort to comfort me.

I take a deep breath and fight back the tears, wiping them from my eyes. "Come on, let's get to our orientation thing."

We both have something called Task Orientation this morning, as do most of our families and The Krulls and Peeta and the handful of tributes they rescued from the arena. It's something they do with all new people to help them get acclimated to 13 and what their role will be here. My siblings and Prim will all be in school though and therefore not assigned a job. When Katniss and I arrive, everyone is already seated and waiting for us before it can begin.

"Sorry, we got a little lost." Katniss lies apologetically as we slide into empty chairs. The woman at the front of the room nods understandingly and then begins.

"Today I'll be introducing you to 13. Based on your intake results from the Processing Center, you've each been assigned jobs which you will report to daily from here forward."

She goes on to read out our names from a list and tell us what we'll be doing. Mrs. Everdeen will be working in the Medical Center based on her experience as a healer. Katniss will work in the Defense Department because of her knowledge of the Capitol and experience in the Games and as a hunter. Haymitch, Beetee and Johanna Mason will be working there too. Anyone with games experience apparently. I wonder if when Madge gets better if that's where they'll expect her to work too? Peeta and the Krulls are obviously sent to work in the Cafeteria/Kitchen for their baking and cooking experience. My mother is sent to the Laundry Department and it makes me feel bad for her. I hate that even here she'll be forced to work by doing other people's laundry. She doesn't seem to mind though, nodding her head in agreement when her task is read off. I expect they'll put me in construction or something like that since I worked in the mines. That's why I'm so taken aback when I hear that I'll be in the Cafeteria/Kitchen. I guess my very brief experience at the Café is what they decided to go with. That's fine though, it isn't labor intensive so I can do it. Probably would have been more enjoyable to be in Defense with Katniss but I don't know much about the Capitol. I notice that Ballard guy from the arena isn't here. Did they not rescue him? It seems like he was part of the plan so I wonder why they didn't get him too?

When they announce that I'll also be working the in the kitchen, Mrs. Krull turns back in her seat to smile at me. I smile back at her and it hits me that she is a woman I need to have a conversation with. She apparently was in on this plan the whole time and may be able to fill me in on more details of the plan. Yes, I definitely need to speak to her sometime today.

The woman from 13 continues to speak, explaining more about 13 and how everyone here plays a part to keep it going. I still can't believe that all this time 13 was right here, hidden away from all of Panem, growing stronger everyday. I wonder if the Capitol has suspicions of this or if like everyone else, they think 13 was abolished?

We're taken on a tour of 13 after the assignments are doled out. Everything here is underground and I'm amazed at what they've managed to do. The Agriculture Department is most surprising to me. They have figured out how to grow plants and vegetables and fruits using special lighting and heat sources. They even have animals down here. This is where the majority of our food comes from, if not all of it. It's pretty impressive to see all of this. They have a department or section for everything you could possibly think of. Apparently, they began building and preparing long before the rebellion and then when the Capitol took out 13, they retreated here, those of them that survived anyway. After that, they slowly built and grew over the next 75 years. They have spies in the Capitol and in each of the districts. Usually in the form of Peacekeepers. That explains the Peacekeeper who lead us away from the viewing and out of 12.

After the lengthy tour, we're to have lunch and then report to our assigned areas where we'll meet our supervisors and they'll instruct us from there. As we head to the cafeteria, I try to get near the Krulls so I can maybe talk to Mrs. Krull but it's no good. The hallways are too narrow and there are too many of us moving through them. Someone does catch me though.

"Hey, you the husband?" I hear from behind me as a hand whacks the back of my arm.

I stop walking and turn to see Johanna Mason. "Yeah." I answer, not really sure what she wants.

"Just wanted to say I was sorry. For the memory thing, you know?" She quickly says.

She's apologizing to me? It isn't her fault. She didn't do it on purpose. In fact, I should actually be thanking her. If not for her, Madge wouldn't even be alive right now. It's only now that this occurs to me. "Uh, no apology necessary. Medic says she should get over it. Actually, I probably owe you a thank you. For making sure you got her out of there."

She just shrugs as if it was nothing and then walks passed me, continuing on towards the cafeteria as if those are the only words we needed to speak to each other and our business is now finished. In a way, I kind of admire that about her. Kind of like she only interacts when necessary, not creating opportunities for anyone to get any closer to her than necessary. Probably keeps her life a lot simpler that way.

I continue on towards the cafeteria and find the room already quite full. I go through the line, scanning the room with my eyes for Madge. I don't know how long she's supposed to be at the Medical Center because I didn't read her itinerary all the way through. For all I know, they may be feeding her over there. And they must be because I fail to spot her amongst the rows of tables and crowds of people. She isn't here. My heart drops a little at the realization.

I grab my tray and then search for a seat. I see the Krulls but they're all together and I sort of want to talk to Mrs. Krull alone so I don't sit with them. I end up joining Katniss and Peeta.

"Hi." Katniss says, seeming slightly startled as I sit down with them. I notice Peeta's eyes are a little red. I must have interrupted something between the two of them. But I've already sat down so it may be awkward if I get up and leave.

"Hey. You guys seen Madge?" I ask.

"No. She must still be in the Medical Center." Katniss tells me giving me a look that says I need to get lost so they can continue their conversation in private.

"Think I'll go see if I can find her. See ya around." I say as I get up from my chair. I leave my food tray behind but grab the apple from it as I go.

I decide I don't feel much like having lunch with everyone right now anyway. I head down to my unit, apple in hand and once there, plop face down on the bed. I'm so exhausted from having not slept the night before that instantly, I fall asleep.

(Madge POV)

After they've poked and examined me fully in the Medical Center and given me my first memory assignment, I'm instructed to head to the cafeteria for lunch. After lunch, I'm supposed to rest and then work on my assignment. The assignment is written on paper, folded up in an envelope and I haven't looked at it yet. I have no desire to go to the cafeteria after how awkward breakfast was this morning and honestly, my head hurts a little from having to answer questions for the medics all morning as they established what Dr. Castillion called my baseline. Basically, they were documenting my starting point just in case my memory comes back in bits and pieces instead one full rush of information. So, headache pounding, I head to the unit I share with Gale, deciding I'll skip lunch today.

I open the door using the keypad. The woman working the desk at the medical center wrote it down and gave it to me as I was leaving. It was kind of her to make sure I had it because I hadn't thought to ask Gale for it and he hadn't thought to give it to me. She had to call and get the code from the housing department but I appreciated her doing so since my only other option was to go get the code from Gale.

Very much to my surprise, as soon as the unit door opens, I see Gale is already here himself. Fast asleep, face down on the bed, a lone apple beside him. Softly snoring. A pang of guilt hits me as I realize he must not have slept much last night on the floor. I close the door behind me and slip off my shoes, not wanting to wake him with my footsteps across the floor. On the nightstand, I see my pills and I take one of the blue ones, like last night and go into the bathroom for a glass of water. After I swallow the pill, I decide a nap may be what I need too. I don't want to lie on the bed with him so I reach over him and grab a pillow.

I lay down on the floor between the bed and the wall and place the pillow under my head. It only takes about 10 seconds before the chilly floor starts to make my hipbones hurt. I roll over, trying to get comfortable to no avail. I sit up, sighing to myself. This is not helping my headache. I look back at the bed, Gale still sound asleep. He's laying in the middle of it so even if I wanted to, I couldn't lay down with him without having to curl up next to him. What am I going to do?

In the bathroom, I look for towels that I could lay down to pad the floor but there aren't any. Apparently the laundry has been picked up already. Of course it has. If it hadn't, then something might actually be going my way for once. I turn back to face the bed and Gale. I'm just going to have to suck it up and get on the bed with him. I carefully position myself on the bed next to him, making sure I lay in a way that keeps me from having to touch him. I'm close to him but not touching him. It's the best I can do for now. I close my eyes and quickly drift off to sleep, the headache meds kicking in and covering me in a blanket of drowsiness.

(Gale POV)

When I wake up, I find Madge, curled up next to me. My breath catches in my chest as hope rises up within me. Has her memory returned? Does this mean that she knows me? That she loves me again? I stare at her, afraid to move. If she doesn't remember me, I don't want to wake her up. This is the closest I have gotten to be to her without her pulling away. I want to savor it. Want to use this one, precious, undisturbed moment to ease the pain that's been relentless on my heart. She's so beautiful. Even with her wounds and bruises, she's breathtaking. I cautiously reach over and trace one of her golden curls with my fingertip. Feeling braver after this doesn't wake her, I gently run my fingers over her cheek. I force myself to pull back though because all I want to do right now is just kiss her. Want to cover her face in kisses and then press my lips to hers. It's been so long since I got to kiss her. So long since I felt her lips against mine. I prop myself up on my arm and just watch her sleep. She looks so peaceful. So at ease. So unlike the Madge I've seen since we've been here. God, I hope her laying here beside me means she remembers.

My curiosity about her memory is answered about an hour later when she wakes up. Her blue eyes opening, widening when she sees my face in such close proximity to her own. And then she does it. She rears back, and then sits up quickly, straightening her clothes. She doesn't remember us. I try to keep my face from falling but I know it is anyway. I sit up too.

"Hey." I say quietly.

"Hi. Were you watching me sleep?"

"Yeah, sorry." I say as I get up off the bed. I've already made her so uncomfortable and she hasn't even been awake for a full minute yet. Good job Hawthorne. Way to look like a creeper.

"It's okay. You don't have to leave." She calls out to me as I go to walk towards the door.

"It's okay?"

"Well, I mean, it's weird but it's okay. I'm not mad or anything."

"I didn't mean to seem creepy or anything. It's just, I mean, I woke up and there you were sleeping next to me. I couldn't help it."

"I had a headache after I finished at the Medical Center. Decided to skip lunch and head back here to rest. I tried to sleep on the floor but I couldn't get comfortable so I didn't have another choice except to get on the bed with you. I, I hope that was alright." She explains and blushes slightly at the end of the explanation.

"Yeah, it's fine. Of course it is." I reassure her.

"So, how was task orientation?" She asks, changing the subject and sounding so much more like the Madge I know than the Madge with no memory.

"Not too bad actually. Got to take a tour of this whole place and got my work assignment. I'll be working in the kitchen."

"The kitchen? You cook?"

"Not exactly. I was working at the café in town while you were in the games. Guess they assigned based off that."

"You worked at the café?"

"Yeah, briefly. But it was after you left so you wouldn't have known about it. It's not something you forgot, I mean."

"Well that's good to hear for a change." She says with a bit of humorous sarcasm.

I sit down on the bed again since she seems comfortable now but I don't try to touch her or try to get too close to her. "I guess it's pretty frustrating hearing about all this stuff you're supposed to remember but don't, huh?"

"Frustrating. Overwhelming. Embarrassing."

"Embarrassing?"

"Mmhmm. Like this morning? At breakfast? If I can't carry on a simple conversation with a child about her dolls, how on earth am I going to be able to function around adults?"

"Don't let what happened with Posy embarrass you. She doesn't know about your memory loss, we didn't want to tell her because she's so young. And she probably thought you were just teasing her anyway. She's crazy about you."

"Crazy about me?"

"Yeah, I wasn't kidding when I said she was your biggest fan. She practically idolizes you. And you, you're pretty fond of her too. You liked to spoil her rotten, do girly stuff with her."

"She's really cute. Lot's of personality in such a tiny person too."

"That's one word for it. She's more than a handful sometimes but it never bothered you. You'd just take her aside, whisper in her ear and then she would calm right down."

"What'd I whisper?"

"Different things. Depended on the situation. Usually you'd make a deal with her or bribe her somehow. Worked like a charm, every time."

"I wanted to do something this morning but I wasn't sure if that was okay or not!" She exclaims.

I smile, careful not to laugh like I did last night. "It would have been fine. That's probably good though, right? That your instinct lined up with your past behaviors?"

"I guess. I feel like I don't know what to do anymore."

"How was the Medical Center? Did they say anything this morning?"

"Okay. I met my Doctor. He's going to meet with me each week to track my progress. And the rest of the week, I'll be given assignments and work with therapists to try and recover my memories."

"What kind of assignments?"

"They gave me one today but I haven't opened it yet. That's what I'm supposed to work on the rest of today." She says as she grabs an envelope from the nightstand and holds it up to show me. "What are you supposed to be doing?"

Shit. I forgot about going to meet my work supervisor after lunch. I glance at the clock and see that it's way passed lunchtime. In fact, it's almost dinner time. "I uh, was supposed to go eat lunch and then meet with my work supervisor. Kinda slept through that though."

"Well maybe there's still time before dinner. You should go. Just explain that you overslept and I'm sure they'll understand."

"Yeah, I probably should. Will you be alright here?"

"I'll be fine. I have an assignment to work on anyway. Go, I'll see you later, at dinner." And she waves me off.

"Okay, bye." I tell her as I hurry off towards the Kitchen. On the way there, all I can think about is how good that just went. She was comfortable talking to me. I was comfortable talking to her. Were we making progress? Does this mean that we're heading in the right direction? Yes, I think it does.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

(Madge POV)

I can't believe how good that just was. We just about had a normal interaction. Sure it wasn't a very lengthy conversation but it still counts. He had startled me a little bit when I first woke from my nap to find his face, only inches from my own, eyes staring right at me. At first, I'd jumped, pulled back in reaction, but then I remembered something and tried to smooth out my response. I remembered when I'd been the one watching him sleep and he'd woken up, then lashed out at me. I remember how awful it felt to have him snap at me and look at me like I was insane. It was bad enough that I'd even cried. And that happened before we were even friends. I imagine it would feel even worse to have your spouse react that way and I already make him feel bad enough so I did my best to soften my response. I'd called after him as he hurried to leave the room, visibly upset. He'd turned in surprise and eventually come back and sat on the bed, talking with me for a little while before we both realized he was supposed to have been somewhere for his new job.

Now I sit alone in this little place, with about two hours until diner, assignment in hand. I open the envelope and pull out the paper so I can see what it is exactly that I'm supposed to be doing.

_Look at the enclosed picture and write down anything you think of when you see it. After you've done that, see what anyone else can tell you about the dress and then write down your response to that as well. Bring the completed assignment to your next Medical Center appointment for discussion._

I pull out the picture and see that it's of a dress. A fancy one. White, strapless with ruffles all the way to the floor. I take the small pencil that came in the envelope and quickly jot down a few words.

Fancy. Capitol Designed. Lovely. Delicate. Expensive.

But that's all that I can think of. And these are just descriptive words for what I see in the picture. No memory is sparked if that's what the goal is. I shove the paper away from me and get to my feet. I'm not sure what it is I really expected to happen with my first assignment but I'm not liking this one so far. It seems stupid. A picture of a dress? Great. What is it supposed to mean to me though? Is it my dress? Is that why they're showing it to me? Was it supposed to bring on a flood of memories? Because it's not. All it's doing actually is making me feel frustrated. I fold it in half and put it in my pocket. I think maybe I need to stretch my legs a bit, go for a walk. I slip my shoes back on and head out the door.

My plan is to just sort of wander around and check this place out. Unlike everyone else, I didn't get the tour this morning and I'm curious as to what this place is like. The hallways are pretty much empty, probably everyone is still working. I know the floor I'm on is only residential so I take the elevator to another level. I push a button on the keypad at random.

"Let's see where this takes me." I say aloud to myself as the elevator begins to move. It stops only moments later on a floor and I poke my head out hesitantly. I see just another empty hall but I can tell it isn't residential because the doors aren't so close together like on my floor. I step out and decide to go left. I don't have anywhere specific I need to be right now so it doesn't really matter where this takes me.

I wander the winding hallway for awhile but don't see anything. Just a few random doors that only open with keypad codes. I reach the end of the hallway and finally find a door without a keypad. I open it, revealing a stairwell.

"Why not?" I mumble to myself and head down the stairs. Once I reach a landing with another door, I go through it and find myself on another residential floor. I decide to wander through it to see how it compares to my own floor. From what I can tell, It's pretty much all the same. Gray doors, plain white walls, no windows or natural light. As I walk, I search for the elevator, deciding this floor isn't much to look at either. I round a corner and bump into someone.

"I'm so sorry!" I spout out as I steady myself. And then I see who it is. It's Rory. Gale's brother.

"Madge? What are you doing on this floor?"

"Oh, hi. Um, I was sort of just taking a walk. Kind of wandering around, not really going anywhere specific. Is this your floor?"

"Yeah. I just got finished with school. I was heading home."

"Oh, they have school here?"

"Yeah. It's different though. They teach different stuff. Like stuff we can use here in 13."

"I see. Where's Posy?" I ask, doing my best to make conversation.

"She and Vick are in a different school section because they're younger. I think they get out at a different time. Probably already at home"

"Well, I guess I'll see you around." I say awkwardly, not really knowing what else to talk to him about. I know he's technically family and all but to me he's just another stranger whose name I happen to know.

"I'm heading home if you want to come with me. Maybe visit with everybody?" He offers up then adds "If you wanna."

"I don't know. I think I'll keep walking a bit. See you later, okay?" I say as I continue walking and look back over my shoulder. He sort of waves at me and looks at me funny. God, he looks like Gale. A slightly younger version of Gale. I wonder if I was close to him? Gale told me I helped him get back across the fence so maybe we were friends? Maybe that's possible? And Gale has a big family. I think I would have liked that. Was I close to them at all? Did we do things together? Ugh! There is so much I don't know.

I locate the elevator and make my way to the Cafeteria. I know it isn't time for dinner just yet but maybe if I'm early I can meet up with Gale when he's finished speaking to his supervisor. Maybe we can eat early and then I can get out of here before too many people come in and I get overwhelmed. The cafeteria is empty but I hear people towards the back, in the kitchen. Workers probably. That must be where Gale is. I head towards the kitchen so I can let him know I'll be waiting out here for him but as I near the door, out comes Tripp Krull. I guess he works here too, which makes sense.

"Hey there!" He greets, his whole face lighting up at seeing me.

"Hi. Are you working?"

"No, just finished up. Off until breakfast tomorrow. Are you looking for Gale?"

"Yes, I was. Have you seen him?"

"Yeah, he was late so the supervisor is still in there with him going over everything. You could probably wait for him."

"Thanks." I say as I smile and take a seat at one of the empty tables. Surprisingly, he pulls out a chair and takes a seat next to me.

"Mind if I keep you company while you wait?"

"Sure, thanks." I tell him. Tripp doesn't make me quite as nervous as The Hawthorne family does because I remember knowing him from growing up. My father and I ate at his family's café all the time.

"So, how's it going so far?"

I sigh and give him a tired smile. "It's going."

"That good, huh?" He laughs. "How's your head?"

"Damaged. Still no memory and lots of headaches."

"Listen, I feel like I owe you an apology. It was kind of my fault that you had to be knocked unconscious." He tells me. His voice serious and soft.

"What? How so?"

"I knew that there was a plan to get us out. I was the other 12 tribute, don't know if you knew that. Anyway, the day before we entered the arena, Haymitch told me some things, not a lot, but enough that I knew we were getting help. Once we were in there you kept telling me we needed to separate from our alliance and I kept putting it off. I knew you were getting paranoid but I had explicit instructions not to tell you anything, no matter what. So I didn't. And then you and I had to split up moments before the rescue was supposed to happen and I should have stayed with you. I should have stayed because I knew how much you didn't trust Johanna. So, for what it's worth, I am sorry you got hurt."

I stare at him, taking in his face, which shows genuine sorrow. He was the other tribute? We were in this together?

"I appreciate the apology though it doesn't sound like you owed me one. Besides, as far as I can remember, it's like it never happened." I joke with him.

He smiles and looks a little relieved. "So we can still be friends then?" He asks, seemingly teasing.

"On one condition." I tease back.

"Oh yeah? What's that?"

"Can we pretend that I haven't lost my memory and only talk about things I actually do remember or about new things? I have so much I don't understand going on right now and it would be nice to have one person that I can talk to where I don't feel like I'm making them tiptoe around me." I explain. And I mean it. With all this about Gale and being married and being part of his family now, I feel so uncomfortable all the time. With Tripp, we were never super close friends so it will be nice if he'll just ignore my memory loss and just become a regular friend.

"Um, I don't know. I, uh, I mean, I can be your friend for sure, that's not a problem. I just think there's a lot you probably don't remember and I should tell…"

"No. I'm serious." I interrupt him. "I know it's a strange request and all but I just have so many people pleading and praying for my memory to return that I just can't take it. It makes me feel like I'm constantly letting them all down every time I don't remember something. I need someone who won't be like that."

He looks uncomfortable and that of course makes me feel the same way. I shouldn't have asked this of him. He obviously doesn't want to do it and since we weren't great friends before, more like acquaintances, it was silly of me to ask such a thing of him. I probably sound like a crazy person. This was stupid.

"Just forget I asked. It was stupid." I say, feeling totally embarrassed. I get to my feet and head for the door as quickly as I can.

"Hey, wait!" He calls after me. I don't wait, don't look back. Instead I just keep walking as fast as my legs will carry me.

When I get back to my unit, I go inside and practically throw myself on the bed. Hot tears pour from my eyes. I hate this so much. All of it. I just want to go home, to my house where my family lives and where I know everything there is to know about my own life. This has to just be one huge bad dream. It's the only thing that makes sense. A nightmare. That's all this is.

(Gale POV)

When I finish making nice with the supervisor who already doesn't care for me, she gives me my schedule and goes over what I'll be doing. Mostly washing dishes and collecting trays and trash. Mopping floors. Nothing fancy, nothing hard. I'll report to work just after lunch and stay until after dinner is finished. I'll do this everyday starting tomorrow. Today, I'm finished with everything I have to do.

It's still before dinner so I figure I have time to get back to the unit and meet up with Madge and we can head to dinner together. I'm still soaring from what transpired earlier. It was so good, so reliving to have had normal conversation with her. Neither of us weirded out by the other. It may be a really small step but it's a big step in my book. It lets me know I have a hope. A real, honest to goodness hope of winning her back again.

Back at our unit, I enter to find a sobbing Madge, face down on the bed.

"What's wrong? Are you okay?" I ask in alarm. What could have happened? I rush over to her and sit down next to her on the bed, careful not to touch her.

She sits up and looks at me, face red and puffy from crying, tears still pouring down her cheeks. "No! I am not okay! I'm going crazy not knowing who the hell I am anymore. I can't take it!"

"Hey, it'll be alright. It'll all work out." I say softly, trying my best to comfort her without hugging her. And all I want to do right now is pull her to me, wrap my arms around and hug her until this pain goes away for her. The most I let myself do is splay my hand out on the bed, just in front of her. Putting it there in case she wants it but making it non-threatening in case she doesn't.

Her fingers inch towards mine but then pull back as she balls her hands up. She looks up at me. Blue eyes looking so lost, so sad that it makes me hurt. "I need answers. And not just answers, I need the whole story. The things that will be hard for me to hear, the good and the bad. All of it."

I nod and swallow. I hadn't expected to have to tell her everything so soon. Figured we'd cover a little at a time. "I'll tell you whatever you want to know."

"Start with the reason we got married. That's where we left off before."

"There was a contract signed on your behalf, when you were an infant. It stated that your name would never go into the reaping bowl in exchange for you to marry Senneca Crane on your 18th birthday." I begin. Maybe it is best if I just pour it all out. Make it as quick as I can.

"Who signed it? Why didn't I know about it?"

"It was your mother's deal. She was terrified you'd be reaped and die like your aunt. She never told you about it. Neither did your father or Mabel. At the end of Katniss's games, Senneca Crane was executed for allowing two Victors. When that happened, you and I were already dating and very much in love. We both assumed that his death meant the contract was void and you were therefore free. And for a little while, we were free and happy, crazy in love."

"Keep going." She orders through tears when I pause to watch her response to what I've just told her.

I nod and continue. "Well, I ended up proposing, you said yes obviously, and we planned a lengthy engagement. At least until after you finished school and turned 18. We, we were really excited." I pause as a lump forms in my own throat as I remember that day in the church when I'd spontaneously asked her to mine, forever.

I fight off tears and continue on. "Then one day Snow summoned you. Practically kidnapped you is really more the way I should put it. Pulled you from school and put you right on a train to the Capitol. Didn't even let you pack a bag to take. Once you got there, he made it clear you were not free of your contract. He made you choose between being reaped, with 500 entries in the bowl, or marrying his personal advisor who was a creepy, scary old man."

"I chose the reaping right away, didn't I?"

"Yeah, you remember?"

"No. Just instinct. If I was in love, I wouldn't have thrown it away, even if taunted by the Capitol."

"Then you decided if you were going into the games anyway, you should be married before you go. You didn't want to miss out on the chance to be a wife. To be my wife. And so we got married. You planned the whole thing in just one week."

"A week?"

"Yep. And then we were married and you moved to the Seam. And you started training for the games, like a career tribute would. Katniss, Peeta, Rory and I helped you train whenever we could. And then Snow announced a Quell twist. Early start to the games. And then you were reaped and until you got here, that was the last time I saw you."

She sits quietly, legs folded, staring down at her hands. I watch as a tear slips from her chin, landing on her knee. I reach over, wipe it away.

"I know that's a lot to understand. I can answer whatever questions you have though. Whenever you're ready."

"Questions is about all I have anymore."

I want to tell her that isn't true. That she has me too. But I don't. "Let me answer them for you. Maybe it'll all be better for you if you know everything."

"Everything you just told me, it doesn't explain my father and Mabel being in prison."

"It sort of does. See, your father was against the marital contract your mother signed. He spent years trying to prove she signed it while mentally unstable. He'd hoped that would give reason to void it. And to help make her look as if she really were unstable, he did something awful. He and Mabel poisoned her slowly, regularly, with tracker jacker venom. That's part of why she was always so ill. She had to be put into a Capitol Facility. From there, the Capitol figured out somehow what your father and Mabel had been doing and they arrested them. You had to testify against them even though you only found out what they'd done after the fact."

"My father intentionally hurt my mother?"

"He said it was the only thing he could think of that might help break your contract."

"Even still…I could never…how do you do that when you love someone."

"Dunno. Guess he just loved you so much it seemed rational to him at the time. I don't think he was proud of himself for doing it, if that makes the blow of it any softer."

"It doesn't." She sobs, making futile attempts to wipe her weeping eyes. "It doesn't at all."

I can't handle seeing her fall to pieces like this. I just can't. I reach for her, doing what every part of my being screams for me to do, and I just pull her against my chest, wrapping my arms around her, gently rocking her as she cries against my chest. And she lets me. For once, she lets me.

_**A/N: First off, thank you all so very much for your reviews and for reading this story! Secondly, I want to wish all of you a very, Merry Christmas!**_


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

(Madge POV)

I let myself cry against Gale's chest until the tears no longer fall. Everything he just revealed to me, destroyed my mind's eye image of my father and mother. Both of them, liars. Both of them thinking they know what's best for me without consulting me or each other. Both of them deceiving me as well as each other. And for what? For me to end up in the games anyway? For them to end up in the Capitol, one in prison and the other in a facility? It makes everything I ever knew about them, every memory I currently have of them, tarnished, twisted and ruined.

When I finally manage to get my crying under control, I stay against Gale's chest for a moment longer. It feels comfortable. Not awkward like I would expect. I can feel the warmth of his body against my face. Feel his chest move as he breaths. Feel his arms wrap around me and his hand gently stroke my hair. And all of this makes me feel safe. And so I wonder, is this the way it was before? When we were a couple? Did he comfort me and make me feel safe? Did he patiently let me cry when I needed to cry? Is that one of the things I loved about him? If only I could remember.

I pull back, wiping my eyes and look up at him. He reaches his hand up to my cheek and wipes away a tear, his thumb lingering for a second as if he doesn't want to let go of me. And if I'm being truthful, I don't want him too either. So I don't move and I don't say anything. I just stare at him and he stares at me.

Eventually, he speaks. "I'm sorry you had to hear all that."

"Thank you for telling me. And for comforting me too."

He nods. "Is there anything else you want to know?"

I think for a minute before answering. I want to know more about us. About me and him. "Yeah, but um, it might be embarrassing for me to ask you." I say and I feel my cheeks blush and I turn my face away from him so he won't see it.

"Hey, don't do that. Don't not ask just because it might be embarrassing." His voice tells me gently as his fingertips lift my face back look at his.

"It's us. I, well, I want to know about us." I confess and I know my cheeks are blushing all over again.

"What about us?"

"All of it?" I say giving him a sheepish look. "I mean, you explained how we became a couple and why we got married but I want to know more than just the surface stuff. I want to know what it was like, you know?"

A wide smile spreads across his face. "You wanna know the good stuff, huh?"

I know he's teasing but it's so embarrassing that I'm having to sit here and ask him about all this. I give him an exacerbated look.

"Sorry." He says quickly. "I didn't mean to embarrass you."

"It's okay." I say granting him forgiveness. "And yes, I do want to know about the good stuff as you so tactfully put it, but I want to know other stuff too."

"Like what?"

"Like our first date, where did we go?"

"I took you to this place in the Seam I called the clearing. It was this big open area amidst a bunch of trees, out of sight from everyone else."

"Did I like it?"

"Yeah, I think so. You went there without me after that so yeah, I'd say yeah, you liked it."

"And here I thought you were just a slag heap kinda guy." I tease.

"For the record, I never once took you to the slag heap." He professes, hands held up teasingly in defense of himself and his reputation.

"Uh-huh. Sure you didn't." I laugh. "Okay, well, was our first kiss in that clearing?"

"No, we did kiss, but it wasn't for the first time. We'd kissed before."

"I kissed you before our first date?" I ask, a little in shock.

"I'm the guilty one there. I kissed you."

"Tell me about it? Everything?" I plead wanting to know every little detail. As far as my mind can remember I've never had a kiss in my entire life so I'm dying to know what the very first one was like.

He smiles and I can tell he's remembering it. "It was the same day you helped Rory. After the viewing, I walked you back home and instead of taking you to the front door, we walked around back to your back porch. You were standing on the steps and I don't know what happened, it was like I just couldn't resist doing it and so I whispered goodnight to you and then just went for it. Kissed you quickly and then took off without another word."

"Oh my gosh." I feel my face flush again and look down in embarrassment. It sounds perfect. Like one of those moments you read about in a storybook or something. Like it was just meant to be. I bet it was wonderful. I bet I didn't sleep a wink that night out of pure elation.

"Yeah, it was every bit as good as it sounds." He adds and his voice sounds dreamy.

My stomach rumbles loudly and I try to cover it with my hand. I hadn't eaten lunch and now my body is embarrassingly pointing out that I need dinner.

"Hey, you must be starving. I bet we can still catch the end of dinner, come on." He says pulling me to my feet.

"I am hungry but I hate going to the cafeteria." I admit to him.

"Why? What's wrong with the cafeteria?"

"Being around a lot of people isn't fun for me right now. All it does is get me frustrated when I can't remember something."

"Well, what if we sit alone? Just me and you?"

"I guess so."

And we head off to the cafeteria, him leading us, me walking just behind him. We don't hold hands or anything like that but he does look back to me occasionally and smile at me. Somehow, being with Gale feels easier since I let him hold me and comfort me as I cried. I'm still shy about a lot of things about us but it was like having him comfort me allowed me to see that maybe I can trust him. Maybe there is more to him than my damaged mind wants to remember.

(Gale POV)

I can't believe she let me hold her like that for so long! Even when she finally stopped sobbing and I reached up to wipe a tear from her face, she hadn't flinched. It's like she suddenly wasn't as scared of me as before. Like we crossed a line somewhere that allowed her to be comfortable.

And then later, in the cafeteria, she and I had sat alone. Just the two of us. It helped that we were so late we almost missed out on dinner altogether and there weren't many people left, but still, it was just us. Now, as we head back to our unit, I'm hoping this pattern continues. I hope that we can keep making this kind of progress.

"So Gale, I do have more I want to know about us if you're up for it."

"Anytime. Ask away." I tell her as we enter our little unit.

"How much time passed between that first kiss and our first date to the clearing?"

"The day after that kiss, I was worried. I'd acted purely on instinct and gotten caught in the moment and because I left immediately after it, I wasn't sure how you felt about it. I wasn't sure if that was okay with you or not. So I hid from you the next morning at school when you were looking for me. I wanted to see your expression so I'd know what was coming at me."

"I bet I was fine with the kiss, wasn't I?"

"Yeah." I smile at her. "I brought you a flower, waited until lunch to give it to you."

"What kind of flower was it?"

"Sunflower." I say as I remember the look on her face when I'd slid that flower across the lunch table to her. She'd lit up like a candle. And I knew she liked me.

"Oh! That's my favorite flower!" She shrieks in excitement.

I try not to laugh and just smile at her for a minute. She's so excited right now that you'd think I just handed a flower to her now.

"You already know that though, don't you?" She asks, suddenly realizing her slip up.

I shrug. "Yeah, I do. But I still like seeing you get so excited about it. I feel like I just gave you flowers again or something. It's nice."

I watch as her cheeks turn pink. I hope she knows how much I really do love her. I hope it comes across as I tell her all about us. "After I gave you the flower, that's when I asked you to go to the clearing with me."

"Did we go that day?"

"After the viewing that night. And then before I walked you home we officially became a couple."

"We did? What'd people say about that?"

I pause for a moment before I answer her. I know good and well what people thought but I really want to know what she's thinking right now. I want to know if this is still something she wants. But how do I ask her about that without freaking her out? This is going all so smoothly that I definitely don't want to scare her off by asking. But I need to know. I do. "Well, I can tell you about it, but before I do, there is something I'd like to know. Something I want to ask you."

"You have a question for me?" She repeats, surprised look on her face.

"Yeah, I do. I'm just curious about what you think about all this. About us, I mean. Is it still something you want?" I manage to get out but my voice is shaky, revealing my nerves. I practically hold my breath as she responds.

"Gale, I can't really answer that." She says with an apologetic sound in her voice. "I'm not even really sure how to explain it to you. It's just that as far as I can remember, as far as what my mind tells me it knows to be true, I hardly even know you. That makes it extremely difficult for me to want to be married to you right now, in this moment."

Her ocean blue eyes look at me, waiting for a response. But I don't have one. I really hate every word that just came out of her mouth. It isn't what I wanted to hear at all. It's more of what I didn't want to hear.

"Gale, I didn't mean to upset you. I'm just trying to be honest." She tells me when I don't respond.

"No, it's fine. I…I asked the question so I have to appreciate your honesty." I choke out. And it really isn't anything I can be upset with her about. It was my question. I should have prepared myself for hearing something other than what I'd hoped for. I just got caught up in the moment with her and all this reminiscing about dating and kissing. And she seemed so excited about all of it that I didn't think it through before I asked her that question.

"This is probably just as hard for you as it is for me, huh? Just in the opposite way?"

I suck in a deep breath and nod. "It is. But that isn't your fault, so I hope you'll keep feeling comfortable asking me questions. About anything. It doesn't even have to be about us. If there's anything at all that I can do to make this easier for you, I hope you'll let me know."

"Well, I could use some help with my first memory work assignment if you're up for that."

"You got it. Lay it on me!" I say and give her a smile. It takes every ounce of effort I have to smile but I do it because it's for her. Because it makes it easier for her.

"They gave me a picture of a dress and I was supposed to write down anything that came to mind and then find out whatever I could about it." She explains as she pulls a folded photograph out of her pocket and sets it before me.

I stare down at it and a whole wave of memories pour over me. It's her wedding dress. Just the dress though. No shoes or the navy sash or her veil. And she isn't wearing it. It's on a dressmaker's form. I have to close my eyes for a moment because the memory of her in that dress, on that day, is just too much for me. Tears well up in the corner of my eyes and I fight to hold them back. After a few seconds, I reopen my eyes and while still staring down at the picture, I answer her. "It's your wedding dress."

"It is? Huh. I guess the Capitol designed it."

"What makes you say that?"

"Well, it just isn't what I would have pictured if I'd had any say in it. Like all those ruffles for example, I never would have asked for that. It's pretty, very pretty, but it just isn't what I would have chosen. I shouldn't be surprised though. I never get to pick out any of my other clothes either." She says nonchalantly as if to her it's just another dress.

I don't tell her that the ruffles are a secret between the two of us and that she did indeed ask for those ruffles. Those ruffles were a surprise for me, from her. I decide right now that I'll keep the ruffles to myself until she gets her memory back.

"It had more too it. There was a veil for the ceremony and a navy blue sash." I tell her, ignoring her ruffles comment.

"Oh yeah? I do like navy a lot so that at least makes sense. Shoes? Do you know what they looked like?"

"Not exactly. They gave you some to go with the dress but I never saw them. You switched them out to wear the shoes I gave you."

"You gave me shoes?" She asks, eyebrow raised.

"For your birthday. Boots. You loved them."

"Boots? Like for hunting? Did we go hunting?" She leans in and whispers as if she's afraid someone will overhear us.

I smile at her. "Yeah, like hunting boots. And you didn't really hunt but you did go into the woods with me."

"No way!" She exclaims, mouth hanging open.

"Yes way. You liked it out there. Even spent the night once."

"I can't believe I did that. I always wondered what it would be like beyond the fence but I was always to scared to go out there."

"You weren't scared at all."

"When you tell me things like that, I have a hard time believing that the girl you're talking about is me."

"Well, hopefully you'll remember her one day. She was really something." I say wistfully. And the minute I do, I wish I hadn't. Her face hardens and I realize the way I said it seems insulting towards how she is now. "Wait, that didn't come out right."

"Forget it. I'm pretty beat though. Think I'll get ready for bed." She says as she promptly stands and goes into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her without so much as a look back at me. And I can't say I didn't have that one coming.

Nice Gale, real freaking nice. Might as well have told her you don't like her at all now. And I do like her. Hell, I love her. I just miss the her that loves me back. I decide to would be easier on the both of us if I'm not here when she comes out of the bathroom. I'll get out of here for a little while and come back later after she's asleep. I get up and leave the unit. Not sure where I'm heading but I keep going.

I end up in a place that I saw during our tour. It's a part of the agriculture center but is open to anyone. It's the closest I can get to being outside. A huge room, filled with all different kinds of trees grown in huge planters, under special lights and heaters. They have a few benches scattered about between the trees and I find one to sit down on. The place is empty, not a soul in sight.

I lay back on the bench and close my eyes. I messed up. I should have thought before I spoke. Shouldn't have asked her that question about how she feels about us. I mean, what did I expect her to say? Yes, Gale, I have no clue who you are but who cares, let's just be married! Arrggh! I'm screwing this up! I had her, right there in my arms, got to hold her to me for the first time in weeks, had her talking comfortably with me and I blew it with my big ass mouth.

I lay on the bench so long that I fall asleep. When I wake up, I have no idea what time it is or how long I've been asleep. I get up, stretching my arms over my head. Not a bad nap considering it's a bench. Sure beats the heck out of the concrete floor in our room. Madge should definitely be asleep by now so I begin heading back. On my way, I realize that it must be way later than I thought because I see people milling about, making their way through the halls. I stop a random passerby and ask the time.

"It's quarter of 6." The woman tells me and then continues on her way.

Quarter of 6! I spent the entire night out on that bench! I wonder if Madge is awake yet? I wonder if she noticed I never came back? And if she did, will that make it better or worse between us? Will she see it as me giving her space or abandoning her? I quicken my pace as I make my way back to the room but when I arrive at the elevators there's a wait because of all the people in the hallways. I opt to take the stairs since it'll be faster than waiting for an elevator and a then having to wait as it stops on every floor between here and my own. The stairs turn out to be a good idea because it's empty. Guess everyone here prefers the elevators. I decide that here and now, the stairs will be my preferred method of moving between floors. I'm two flights away from my floor when I hear voices that make me stop and listen. Familiar voices.

"All I'm saying is, I don't see why you wouldn't just do it. This could be your chance. The one you never really got before."

"But she doesn't remember and it seems wrong to do what she asked and not tell her that I've been in love with her for years."

It's Tripp and Marah. Talking about Madge. I freeze, needing to hear more.

"She doesn't even know the person she's married to."

"And then what? I get close with her and she ends up developing feelings for me back? That's great and all but what about when her memory returns and she knows I wasn't honest with her? Then where does that leave me? At least if I'm honest up front, I can still be her friend."

"Didn't you get enough of just being her friend before?"

"Just stop Marah. I never should've mentioned it to you."

And then I can't hear them anymore. They've left the stairwell. What did Madge ask Tripp to do? And when did she even see him? And why does Marah have to egg him on like that? Does she have to be so against me and Madge all the time? And most importantly, what is Tripp planning to do about it? It being whatever it is Madge asked of him.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

(Madge POV)

I stay in the bathroom for awhile, not wanting to see Gale right now. His comment about how great I used to be really has me fuming and if I don't cool down, I'm afraid I'll snap at him. Honestly, I know he didn't mean it the way it sounded and he even apologized for the way it came out but I have to believe that sometimes, things sound a certain way because there's a bit of truth behind them. And with what he said, there probably is. Of course I was more likeable to him before I lost my memory than I am now. I don't even know him now. And I don't seem to know myself either for that matter.

After about an hour, I finally come out of the bathroom, intent on going straight to bed. Much to my surprise though, Gale isn't here. He's gone. I wonder where he went? He didn't even have the courtesy of knocking on the bathroom door and telling me he was leaving so I assume he doesn't want me to know where he is. I turn down the lights and crawl under the blankets. At first, I place myself square in the middle of the bed but then I decide that I'm being ridiculous. Gale shouldn't have to sleep on the floor. And I do trust him not to touch me or do anything to make me uncomfortable. So I scoot over to one side, making sure to leave the blanket turned back on his side so that he'll know he's welcome in case I'm already asleep when he gets back.

I lie in bed with my mind playing back over the memories Gale shared with me tonight. Our first kiss was on the back steps of my house. And it was unexpected, which I like. And he told me he'd followed it up by bringing me a sunflower to school the next day which I also liked. He never told me about how others responded to us dating but I still want to know so I'll have to ask him again. Anytime Seam people date town people, it's always huge gossip. My being the daughter of the Mayor would have only fueled such gossip. And Gale, while being from the Seam, was in fact one of the most sought after boys in school thanks to his good looks. A fact he was quite aware of, fully enjoying the bevy of girls that flocked to him.

At some point, I drift off to sleep. I don't sleep through the night though. Instead, I wake a few hours later after a nightmare. The nightmare was about my father hurting my mother but the details are fuzzy to me now and I can't remember it fully. I check the clock as I notice Gale still isn't back yet. It's 4:30am! Where is he? Shouldn't he be back by now? I know we left things on sort of an unpleasant point after his comment and my getting angry but still, he should be back. Did he go sleep at his mother's place? Would they even have room for him there? And do they allow that sort of thing in 13? I turn up the lights and sit up in bed. When he comes back, I'll have to talk to him. I need to apologize for getting angry but I also need to make sure he knows that I am trying my hardest, that none of this is easy for me.

I stare at the four, blank walls for the next hour and he still isn't back. Breakfast will start being served in an hour so I go ahead and get up. I make the bed and get myself dressed. I hate this grey clothing they insist we all wear here. It's dull, just like everything else. I wait a little longer but after he still doesn't return from wherever it is he disappeared to, I decide to take myself to breakfast and try to eat before too many people get there. It'd been so much easier last night at dinner when Gale and I got to the cafeteria just before the end of dinner service. I just can't handle the crowds of people very well. My hope is that going early will give me the same smaller crowd results.

The elevators are crowded but I just keep my head down. I don't see anyone I know so I don't have to worry about people chatting with me. And if my face is turned away from them, they won't be able to stare at my wounds. Back in 12, everyone in the whole district knew who I was so there was no way I'd ever be able to blend into a crowd like I manage to do on the elevators.

Once I arrive at the cafeteria, I hurry to get in the food line only to find that I'll be eating the same boring oatmeal mush with raisins and walnuts again. Guess they don't do variety with food. Doesn't matter though, I find a seat away from everyone else and choke down the meal as quickly as I can. The sooner I finish eating, the sooner I can get out of here.

"Hey Madge! You by yourself this morning?"

I look up from my mushy breakfast to see Marah Krull, Tripp's older sister. "Good morning. Yes, I'm just eating and then heading over to the Medical Center." I tell her with a smile. I don't know her very well except from the café. She's older than Tripp and I, so she was never in my classes at school. She was always pleasant though whenever I saw her in the café.

"Well, enjoy! Have a good day!" She chirps and then continues on her way. I realize she's working. She has on an apron and is carrying a bin of silverware.

Before I can get too many more bites down, I'm interrupted again, this time by Tripp. "Hey, do you have a minute?"

"Sure." I tell him, still slightly embarrassed that I'd asked him to be friends with me without acknowledging the year I can't remember. I think I blush a bit.

"I wanted to say I was sorry if I upset you yesterday. I didn't mean to."

"No, don't apologize. It was foolish of me to ask such a thing. Just got overwhelmed with everything and it leaves me sort of longing for a bit of normalcy. Just forget I asked, okay?"

He nods and doesn't say anything else about it and it makes me relax a little. "So, you don't look like you're enjoying your breakfast all that much."

"Mushy, bland oatmeal two days in a row leaves a lot to be desired." I say as I push the food around in my bowl.

"Wait here, I'll be right back!" He says and he dashes off towards the kitchen in the back. Moments later he reappears, a small shaker in hand.

"Try this with it." He suggests as he sprinkles something into my oatmeal.

I take a bite and realize it's cinnamon and sugar. And it makes it so much better! "Wow, who knew a sprinkle of cinnamon and sugar could make such a difference."

"It really does. Spices and seasonings don't seem to get used much here, probably hard to get them. I figure no one will notice if I sneak this out and doctor up your meal for you." He whispers with a smile.

I lean in, smiling back and whisper "It'll be our little secret!"

"Good, now enjoy! See ya later, okay?"

"Bye Tripp!" I call out and wave as he hurries back to the kitchen. Thanks to Tripp, I'm able to scarf down the rest of my meal much easier. It's still oatmeal but at least it has flavor to it now. As soon as I finish, I get up and make my way out of the quickly filling cafeteria. Another communal meal survived without having awkward memory loss slip ups, I think to myself as I leave the room.

The woman at the desk in the Medical Center recognizes me this time without having to take my name and sends me back to my therapist right away.

"Good morning Mrs. Hawthorne. Ready to begin your first day of therapy work?" A man with whiskers asks as I enter a small room.

"I am. And please, call me Madge." I'm still not comfortable with the sound of my last name as Hawthorne rather than Undersee.

"Of course. And pardon my manners, my name is Renaldo. Ren for short. Please, have a seat."

I sit down in the armchair he gestures too and he sits in the one across from me.

"So Madge, why don't we get started with you telling me how you're adjusting to all of this. I imagine it's come with a few challenges."

I watch as he settles back into his chair getting comfortable. It's funny, I always pictured a therapist to be taking notes or sitting behind a desk but Ren isn't. He's just sitting here, ready to chat with me as if that's all we're doing. Instantly, I feel more comfortable.

"Well, it hasn't been easy. I mostly find myself feeling overwhelmed."

"With what exactly?"

"Everything? I feel like I have no idea who anyone is or who I am for that matter. Every time I get around a big group I feel stiff. Like everything I do or say feels forced and unnatural."

"Is it easier with just one person at a time?"

"It is. But it's still hard even then. I can't seem to say or do the right things and end up feeling embarrassed. Or I take things the wrong way and end up angry."

"Do you feel in control of your emotions?"

I think for a moment before I answer him. "No, not all the time. One minute I'm fine, the next I'm crying my eyes out and then before you know it, I'm laughing. I wasn't like that before. I always had perfect control over my emotions and actions. It was practically a talent."

"That's understandable and expected with head injuries. You should regain control of your emotions as you become more comfortable with your surroundings and those around you. How has it been adjusting to learning you're married?"

"That's the hardest part. You see, Gale, my husband, he and I were never friends. I always thought he hated me. My memory cuts off just before he and I started dating. So that makes it incredibly difficult when I'm with him. I don't know him at all, not really. And when I watch him, I can tell it's hurting him that I can't remember us as a couple and then I just feel guilty. But I can't just pretend everything is fine and just be his wife. I mean, I've never even kissed anyone and suddenly I find out that I'm married to a boy I barely know? I don't know what to do with that."

"Mmhmm. What about your assignments? Have you had any yet?"

"Just one. They gave me a picture of a dress and I was supposed to write down anything that came to mind. So I did but when I looked back at what I'd written they were all just descriptive of the picture, not specific to a memory. Come to find out, it was a picture of my wedding dress."

"Did it spark any shred of memory for you?"

"Nope, nothing. But, that may be because I didn't design or pick out that dress. I had Capitol buyers that did all my shopping for me. From the looks of that dress, I don't think I had any say in it whatsoever."

"Would you want to watch video of yourself?"

"You have video of me? How? Of what?"

"Not just of yourself. It's footage from the games. We as a staff were unsure if you should see it but I feel strongly that seeing yourself, your real self, may reawaken those sleeping memories. The choice will be yours though. We wouldn't force you to do anything like that if you found it to be too difficult."

The games. They have video of me in the games. Do I want to see that? Do I want to watch that? I think for awhile before I answer him. I do want to see it but what if I kill someone? Can I handle seeing that? I wonder if they can edit it for me? "Um, I would like to see it, but not all of it. Would it be possible to have it edited? I don't want to see if I killed anyone."

"You didn't kill anyone in the games. Never had too."

I breathe an audible sigh of relief. That's truly good news. I don't know if I'd be able to live with myself if I knew I'd taken someone's life. Ren gives me a warm smile and I know he must understand how I feel.

"So would you like to see it then?" He asks.

I nod. "Yes, I think it would be good to actually see myself from a time I can't remember. Sometimes, when Gale tells me stories they sound like make-believe and I can't picture it. So I do think actually seeing would be helpful. If not for my memory, at least for understanding on a higher level than I can now."

"Alright then. I'll have a device brought to your residence later today. Watch what you can but try not to get too upset with anything you see. We can discuss it at our next session."

"Okay, I can do that. Thank you very much."

"Now, before I send you over to have those stitches checked out, is there anything else I can help you with this morning?"

"Actually, yes. Can you tell me why we have to wear grey clothing all the time?"

He chuckles a little and smiles. "It seems silly, right? Well, it started so long ago. When we first took 13 underground, very few of us had anything more than the clothes on our backs because of how quickly the Capitol destroyed our district. We'd already been stockpiling supplies and somehow, quite a large quantity of grey colored fabric bolts had been collected. When our seamstresses began making new clothing, this is what they used. And very soon, everyone here was dressed in all grey. Eventually, the Leadership Board decided to make it the official color of the new 13."

"That all makes sense but why do we have to wear it? Why the requirement?"

"That came later. Over the years, we've welcomed in many, many people from other districts in Panem. People needing escape or refuge. Some of these people were able to bring possessions with them, depending on the circumstances of their escape. At first that didn't seem like a problem but soon we began to notice a divide forming amongst our citizens. Those originally from here, had plain grey, simple clothing. Those coming in often were of status back in their former districts and therefore, they owned fancy, expensive clothing. This gave an impression of being special and we began to notice division rather than merging."

"I see. So you want everyone here to feel like they're on the same level. Like we're all equal." I say as I think about how divided everything had been in 12 with the Seam and the Town. It makes sense.

"Exactly. The Capitol always tried to have division amongst each district because division weakens you. Here in 13, we only want unity, which makes you stronger."

"I like it."

"So do we." He says with a wink. "Now, off you go. Those stitches need to be checked out to make sure everything's healing."

I head over to an exam room to let the medic examine me. It makes sense, what he said about the Capitol not wanting unified districts. If you have too many people working together, they might do what 13 had done and form a rebellion to overtake the Capitol.

In the exam with the medic, she takes all my vitals and notes that I seem to be better hydrated now. She points out that I should be eating more though because I've lost another half pound when I should have started gaining. I don't offer up the fact that I've skipped a meal. I try not to cringe when she lets me know that I'll be on a special weight gaining diet if my weight doesn't start improving on it's own. The last thing I want since I can barely get down this terrible food as it is now. What I need is breakfast from Mabel or a good dinner from the café.

She gives me a new cream for the wounds on my face. Something with Vitamin E oil to help ease the scarring. I hope it works. Right now, I have big puffy red lines across my face. When she checks my stitches on my head wound though, she sees signs of infection. Great, just what I need. More complications. She cleans the infected area with a solution that stings and then hands me a bottle of medicine that I have to take to fend off the infection. She cautions that I have to keep the area clean and dry as much as possible. She's kind enough to give me a hair band to tie my hair back with and helps me secure it in a way that covers the bald spot and stitches almost completely.

Once I'm finished with the medic, I'm supposed to go to lunch and then back to my unit to rest until my portable viewing device arrives. Curious to see if Gale's been back yet or not, I swing by the unit first before going to the cafeteria. I kind of hope he's there so I can talk to him about last night. To apologize, to explain, to just sort of make things right. To make sure we're okay.

He's not there though it looks as if he has been. I can tell someone's been sitting on the bed I made before I left but that's all. He wasn't due to work until after lunch so I maybe he headed to the cafeteria early so he could eat before work. I put my new bottle of pills and the tube of cream on the nightstand and then head to the cafeteria myself.

After I've collected my lunch tray, I look around for Gale but don't see him or Katniss. I do see Mrs. Hawthorne on the far side of the room but she's engaged in conversation with someone and I feel strange about going over to sit with her alone. I'm about to take my tray and find a spot alone when I hear my name being called out. I whirl around and see Marah waving me over to where she and Tripp are sitting.

"Hey, Madge, over here. Come sit with us!"

"Hi, you guys finished working already?" I ask as I set my tray down at their table.

"Yeah, just finished up a few minutes ago. Thought we'd grab a bite before we go crash."

"Marah despises getting up early and we had to up at 5:30." Tripp explains.

"I was up early too but I don't mind."

"What job did they assign you?" Marah asks me as she picks at her sandwich.

"They didn't yet. I have to go to the Medical Center for therapy every day until I get my memory back."

"Lucky you. I got the pleasure of washing dishes all morning." Tripp says.

"Hey, they're giving me a portable device to watch our games later today. Would you want to watch too? I mean, since you were there and all." I offer.

"I don't know, I'm pretty beat." He tells me sounding hesitant.

"Don't be ridiculous Tripp, you never even got to see your own games. Of course he wants to come watch it with you." Marah interjects before I can reply to him. He shoots her a look and then looks to me and nods.

"Sure, I'll come watch it with you." And then he adds, "If that's alright with Gale of course."

"Why would he care? Besides, he has to work and to be honest I haven't even seen him today. He disappeared and I can't find him."

"Well, I just didn't want to step on any toes, you know?" He tells me still looking slightly hesitant.

"It'll be fine. And Marah, you can come too if you want." I offer, realizing it was rude of me to invite Tripp and not her too.

"Thanks but no thanks. I already watched them."

"Oh, right. I guess you did." I say, feeling a tad embarrassed.

We finish up eating and head for the elevators. Marah returns to their floor but Tripp comes with me back to mine. I'm glad he's going to watch it with me. Somehow that makes it seem less scary. And if I have questions along the way as I watch it, he'll be able to answer them because he was right there with me.

In my unit, I find the portable viewing device already there and waiting for me. They must have delivered it while I was at lunch. I turn and look at Tripp. "You ready for this?"

"Ready if you are." He tells me and slides down to sit on the floor. I start the video and sit down on the floor beside him. Ready for my first look at what Madge Undersee, Tribute in the Games, looks like.

I expect the video to begin in the arena as the gong sounds but it doesn't. Instead, it starts with the Reaping. I watch as they call my name and I walk up to the stage. I smile the whole way up there, head held high, not looking afraid at all.

"Wow, I don't even look scared." I practically whisper.

"You were scared but brave beyond belief. You were so determined not to let the Capitol see you sweat." He tells me, an admiring tone to his voice.

And then something happens that I didn't expect at all. Tripp's name isn't called out. Rory Hawthorne's is. And Tripp volunteered. He went in by choice. I turn to face him in disbelief and confusion but before I can say anything, he just shakes his head as if not to ask. I do anyway.

"Why would you volunteer for Rory?"

"I didn't know yet that there was a rescue plan. I couldn't let you go in there with Rory, he was your family, and I couldn't let Gale volunteer and go in with you. You would've been so heartbroken if you managed to make it back home."

I stare at him trying to understand how he could have even considered making such a sacrifice for me. It, as with most everything these days, doesn't make sense to me.

"You did that for me?"

"Yeah. But can we just not talk about it?"

"No way. You make a sacrifice like that for someone and it warrants being talked about! Why would you ever do that for me?"

"You and I had become friends. Really good friends. And on your part, that's all there ever was but for me, I always cared about you a little bit more."

Tripp Krull and I had become good friends? And he had feelings for me? He did this out of feelings for me? "But…I was married. Why would you have feelings so deep for someone who wasn't available?"

"That's just how it works sometimes. You can't force your heart to feel a certain way. But don't worry, I was never disrespectful of your marriage with Gale. I wouldn't do that."

And somehow, I know he's being truthful. I know he wouldn't cross any lines with my marriage. I don't know how I know this, I just do. I feel it in my gut. "Did Gale know how you felt?"

"Yeah, sort of. We'd come to a point of understanding. He was fine with my being friends with you but I don't think he was ever too crazy about me in general."

I don't know what else to say so I just nod and we continue watching the video. Tripp seems relieved that I'm not going to make him discuss it with me. The video blurs past me though because my mind can only focus on the newest discovery. Tripp Krull liked me. Maybe even loved me. And he did so even when he knew it would never lead anywhere. He cared so much for me, that he was ready to die just so I wouldn't have to endure the heartbreak of going into the games with Rory or Gale. I tear up, touched by such unselfish, unconditional caring on his part.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

(Gale POV)

What the hell? Tripp's going after Madge now? Would he really do that? Would he take advantage of her lack of memory like that? Was he going to finally get to make the move on her that he'd always wanted to make? Would it work? I lean my head back against the stairwell wall, close my eyes and force myself to take slow, deep breaths. No need for me to get all worked up. Not just yet. Just because I overheard part of that conversation does not mean I need to panic. I tell myself this even as I feel my temper beginning to boil.

I need to get to Madge and just see her. I need to talk to her, let her know that I'm sorry for being thoughtless last night when I made that comment about how great she used to be. And I need to be sure she knows it wasn't intentional that I didn't come home last night. I pray she doesn't think it was something I did out of ill intent. Please be home, please be home. I take the stairs two at a time as I hurry to our unit. Once I get to our floor, I push past the crowd of people waiting at the elevators and go straight to our door. I jab the buttons on the keypad and burst through the door as soon as it unlocks only to find an empty room. She isn't here.

Breakfast. She must already be at breakfast! If I hurry, I should be able to catch her. My feet are taking me as fast as they can to the cafeteria when I bump into Katniss.

"Gale! Hey, glad to bump in to you. I need to talk to you"

"I'm sorta in a hurry, can it wait?" I tell her impatiently as all I want to do right now is find Madge.

"Actually, no. I need to show you something. Trust me, you'll want to see it."

"Catnip, I really have to find Madge. I'm sorry. I'll come find you as soon as I can, I promise." I apologize as I hurry passed her, sending her my most apologetic look before I continue to make my way to the cafeteria. She calls my name out in frustration one more time but I don't stop and I don't look back. I can't right now. I just can't.

In the crowded cafeteria I scan around for her to no avail. Marah Krull finds me though. And she knows I'm looking for Madge.

"You looking for Madge?" She asks feigning ignorance.

I glare at her, afraid if I speak I might just outright punch her instead. And as much as I'd like to do that, I know it isn't the solution I need at the moment.

"Because if you are, she isn't here. She was eating with Tripp but you've just missed her. Sorry." She gloats as she wipes down a table and flits passed me.

I hate her. I really hate her. I clench my jaw shut and storm off towards the Medical Center. She had breakfast with Tripp, huh? Well isn't that just perfect. He's gonna do it. He's making his move and trying to steal her away from me. Well I won't let that happen. No way in hell is anyone taking her away from me. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever. I'll fight for her. I'll win her back, memory or no memory, she belongs with me.

I fight back stinging tears in my eyes as I board the elevator for the Medical Center. I'm about to get off on that floor when I'm headed off by Katniss, this time with Haymitch too.

"Come on Kiddo, we need you to see something. The princess can wait." He tells me as he blocks my exit of the elevator and they instead climb aboard with me.

I go to push passed them but they stop me. Haymitch with his grip on my arm, Katniss with her voice. "Gale, please."

"Fine. Just get this over with fast. I need to get to Madge." I cave as I fold my arms over my chest.

"If you'd cooperate, we'd get finished much faster." Haymitch points out as he casually leans against the wall of the elevator.

"Look, you will want to see this. Come with us to the Defense Center, watch this video clip and then you can go find Madge. She's with her therapist right now anyway so you couldn't talk to her for at least an hour." Katniss reasons with me.

I silently follow them to the Defense Center where they have to get a special pass for me to enter with them since I don't have clearance for this Department. It takes forever as I wait impatiently for the man behind the desk to fill out a form with all my information. Finally, he hands me a temporary pass that I must wear around my neck so long as I'm in here and must surrender it before leaving.

With that nonsense all squared away, the three of us make our way to Haymitch's office. He has an office? That drunken fool of a Victor actually has an office? That's something I never would have imagined. He sits at his desk, props his feet up on the desk and Katniss gestures for me to sit in a chair next to hers.

"Alright, show me whatever it is already."

"This kiddo, is footage obtained from the Capitol. It aired all over Panem last night." He tells me as he clicks a remote and a video begins to play.

I watch as Snow gives a lengthy speech about the sabotage on the arena during the Games and the escape of not only Tributes, but their families as well. He's careful not to mention that 13 is where we escaped to or that they were our saving grace. He makes it sound more as if we all are hiding somewhere in the Capitol lands between one of the districts. He does make certain to warn that the penalty for such actions can be death if seen fitting by the Capitol. The video then switches to an interview of Madge's father. He looks awful. Thinner, paler with heavy bags under his glazed over eyes. I can tell that stylists have tried to cover it up but I know him well enough to know that he isn't well or being taken care of.

In the interview he speaks in such monotones that it doesn't even sound like his voice. His eyes don't move or blink. He seems drugged almost. Or hypnotized. I don't know, altered somehow. He speaks directly to Madge.

"Where ever you are my darling daughter, I ask that you please show yourself. Find a peacekeeper or loyal citizen and identify yourself. If you act accordingly, the President will be willing to offer you immunity for your help in bringing justice upon those who have acted against Panem."

And then the video clip ends with a posting of pictures of all of us. Those of us that disappeared. Those of us charged with kidnapping of tributes, destruction of Capitol grounds, and treason. One by one, each of our faces appears on the screen so that anyone watching knows exactly what we look like. And then Snow places a bounty on our heads. Anyone who sees us and provides information leading to our capture will be richly rewarded by Snow himself.

Haymitch clicks off the video and looks to me. "So, I guess you can see our dilemma. Do we tell her or not tell her?"

"You can't. She's barely holding herself together as it is now. This would crush her, seeing her father like that. She cried for so long just finding out that he was in prison. She won't be able to deal with this on top of everything else she has going on right now. Does Snow know where we are?"

"Snow doesn't have a clue where we are. If he did, they'd already be on us. He's trying to bait Madge with her father. But don't buy that load of bull he's selling about giving her immunity. If they get their hands on her, she's a goner for sure. And so are the rest of us. They'll break her down, pick her little beat up brain for info and then discard her like trash as they hunt us all down."

"We wanted your input on this because we weren't all on the same page about how to proceed."

"The Defense Department wants my input?" I inquire skeptically.

"Not with our Defense plans. We've got that handled. Your input is needed with how we should proceed with Madge."

"What do you mean?"

"Obviously Madge is in a delicate state with her memory missing a few things and all. This video is classified information, stuff not privy to the rest of 13. If we tell her about it, she has to keep it confidential. She won't be able to discuss it with anyone. Not her doctors, not her friends, not a soul."

"We were only even considering showing this to her because it directly involved her family." Katniss adds quietly.

"You really can't show this to her. She isn't in a good place right now and she gets so overwhelmed. Even playing with Posy was too much for her the other day. I'm telling you, she can't handle this. Not right now anyway. Maybe later, maybe when she's got a better grasp of everything, but not yet."

"Alrighty then, the video waits until you say the word." Haymitch says as he pulls his feet from his desk, sitting upright in his chair.

"Come on, I'll get you signed out and walk over to Medical with you." Katniss says. I follow her out of the room and back to the front desk where I again have to go through all the paperwork and hoops to get signed out and turn in my temporary pass. It takes nearly an hour, which is beyond insane.

By the time we get back to the Medical Center, Madge is already gone. I've just missed her for the second time today. I bang my fist against the concrete wall in frustration, blooding my knuckles. The woman working the front desk of the Medical Center notices then insists that I have my hand looked at by a medic before I leave. I protest but she's already on her phone, paging someone for me.

I roll my eyes and sit down in a chair. Katniss takes a seat and waits with me. I look over at her and she gives me the most unsympathetic look ever.

"What? It's your own stupid fault you know. Probably oughta do something about that temper of yours. What's up with you anyway?"

"Just really need to talk to Madge is all."

"Sure. That's all it is."

"Can we not talk about this?" I ask her, annoyed at this whole day so far.

"Fine. Wanna hear about other problems then?"

"Shoot." I tell her, happy to hear about anything other than things relating to Madge.

"You know the other day when you sat down at the table with Peeta and I and it was all weird? Well, it was like that because Peeta got some bad news about his family."

"Wait, they aren't here too?" I ask, only now realizing I hadn't seen any of them since we got to 13.

"No. His mother was deemed too great of a risk to try and bring here. She's too much of a Capitol supporter. When plans were being made, all the families were secretly evaluated and the board here in 13 wasn't comfortable that she could be trusted."

"What happened to them?"

"After we all vanished,the Capitol picked them up. Closed down the bakery and summoned them all to the Capitol. They're probably all being held in the prison and interrogated. Peeta's a wreck. He agrees that his mother wouldn't have wanted to come here, but he feels for them all the same. They're still his family."

"Aww man. No wonder he looked so upset." I can't even imagine being here without my family, knowing I'd never see them again.

"Yeah. He's been a total wreck. So if you see him at work maybe you could be extra nice to him?"

I nod and realize when she mentions work that I'm going to be late for my first day if I don't wrap it up here soon. Thankfully, the medic arrives and quickly cleans and bandages my hand so I can go.

As I hurry to the cafeteria, I remember that I still haven't seen Ballard anywhere and I'm sure Katniss knows his whereabouts. "Hey, what happened to that Ballard kid from 4?"

"Ballard? He's one of the insiders for 13. We had to leave him behind otherwise his cover would've been blown."

"That kid was an insider? Wow." I just assumed 13 only had connections with adults.

"Yeah, like they told us, there are insiders all over the place." She shrugs as if she's already accepted the fact that it's just how it is, spies walking amongst us our whole lives while we're none the wiser.

Once I arrive in the cafeteria, I do a quick search for Madge but once again, I fail to find her. I do notice that Tripp isn't anywhere to be seen either. He better not be with her, wherever she is. Not if he's worming his way into her heart.

I check in with my supervisor and get sent straight over to the sink that's rapidly filling with dirty dishes. As I wash the dishes, my mind gets me more and more worked up about this whole Tripp thing. Before, back when Madge and I were just dating and he'd tried to make a move with those stupid flowers, I was so pissed off. I'd cut out of school and gotten in a fight with Madge over it. Oh, and I'd knocked the daylights out him too. And for awhile, that had worked, up until I overheard that stairwell conversation between him and Marah this morning. I thought he was just being a good friend to her. Even after I found out that he was in love with her, I still trusted him not to act on it. I did, I really did. And apparently, I'm a flipping idiot. And now I'm up here scrubbing dishes while he's off somewhere being the sleaze that I originally thought he was. If he so much as lays a hand on her, I'm gonna kick his face in all over again. She may not remember it, but she is my wife and he does need to remember that even if she doesn't.

After the lunch service clean up ends and dinner prep completed, we are given a short break to eat an early dinner since we'll be working through the dinner shift and I remember what Katniss said earlier about Peeta's family. I go over to where he's sitting and join him for our break.

"Feel like some company?"

"Katniss told you, huh?" He says knowingly as he eyes me.

I shrug and sit down anyway and start chowing down on my meal. The food here is plentiful enough but it's not exactly delicious. I eat it anyway because at the end of the day, food is still food.

"I'm stuck on dish duty. What'd they stick you with?"

"Baking. Nothing fancy though. Just doing mass quantity loaves of bread."

"Well, that beats doing dishes." I offer up for lack of any other conversation starters.

"I guess. So how's it going with Madge?"

I grumble a little as I feel this is going to be the new question I get asked whenever I see anyone who knows us. I know everyone means well but it's sort of a difficult question for me to answer. "Okay. Could be better but it could also be a lot worse."

"Any memory yet?"

"Nope. Right now she doesn't know me, or us rather, at all." I reply trying not to sound as pitiful as I feel.

"You should take her on a date."

"A what?" I ask in surprise.

"I said, you should ask her out on a date. It's gotta feel funny being married to someone you don't feel like you know so take her out, let her get to know you all over again."

I sit back in my chair and stare at him, mouth half open. It never occurred to me to do anything like that. And it's brilliant! That's exactly what I need to do!

"Mellark, you just may be a genius!" I proclaim as a wide grin spreads across my face.

"I do what I can." He says looking pleased that he may have helped out with my situation.

I fly through the rest of my shift just wanting to be done as soon as possible. The dinner rush keeps me so busy that I don't get a chance to peek out into the cafeteria to look for Madge. I should have thought ahead to tell Katniss to meet up with her so she'd have someone she actually knows to eat with but of course I was too busy to stewing about Tripp and Marah too think of it. Hopefully, Tripp didn't think of it and offer to eat with her. I try to focus on Peeta's idea of taking her on a date instead of focusing on Tripp. It's probably best if I'm not incredibly ticked off when I finally get to talk to her today.

When my shift ends, I rip off my apron and rubber gloves, tossing them aside, and haul it as fast as I can up to our floor. First I'm going to apologize and straighten out last night and then I'm going to just ask her out. Tell her I want to take her on a date, let her get to know me all over again.

I'm all amped up with excitement until I round the corner and see Tripp Krull coming out of my unit! Oh hell no! He was not just in there with Madge! In my own home! Rage burns through me and the next thing I know, I have him pinned against the wall, my forearm tight against his neck.

"You keep your hands off my wife!" I snarl at him.

He looks at me, eyes wide and scared, and tries to speak to me but I have my arm pressed so hard against his throat that he can't. I pull back my arm but maintain my stance.

"I…I didn't touch her! I just…we were just…a video." He stammers, caught completely off guard by my actions.

"I heard you and Marah talking this morning and I'm warning you right now that if you do anything, your ass is mine!"

His eyes get even wider and he opens his mouth to say something else but I shove away from him, giving him one last threat-bearing glare and let myself into the unit.

Inside, I don't see Madge but when she hears the door open, she steps out of the bathroom. Just the sight of her melts my anger away, makes me calm down. She's here. She's here and she's beautiful and I love her.

"Hey." Is all I can say, not taking my eyes from hers.

"Hey." She offers up in return as she gazes back at me.

"I've been chasing you down all day trying to find you."

"You were?"

"Mmhmm. Kept just missing you everywhere I went. I needed to explain about last night, I'm sorry it took me until now to find you."

"I looked for you too. At first anyway. Then I kind of thought maybe you didn't want to be found." She tells me softly, sounding unsure about how I'll feel.

"I always want you to find me. I'd never hide from you." I tell her, taking steps until I'm closer to her. I want to pull her into my arms and kiss her. Want to kiss her more than anything. She doesn't step backwards but I can tell my closeness to her makes her nervous as I see her swallow, eyes studying my every move. She can tell I want to kiss her. I don't though, I hold back.

"Can we talk?" I ask her.

She nods, eyes still watching me as I gesture for us to sit down. She sits on the bed and I sit facing her, still close to her but not as close as when I first came in.

"About last night, look, I left because I was mad at myself for what I said or for how it came out and I knew I'd upset you. I ended up falling asleep on a bench in the agriculture center and didn't wake up until this morning. I never meant to not come back last night and I'm sorry that I didn't."

"I'm sorry that I got so upset. I really did know that you didn't mean it the way I took it."

"So we're okay then?" I ask giving her a hopeful smile.

She bites her bottom lip and smiles as she nods. I smile back and decide this is the perfect time to ask her on a date.

"Well now that we have that all squared away, I have something to ask you."

"What's that?"

"Well, I wanted to ask if you would go on a date with me."

I watch as her cheeks flush pink and she bites her bottom lip again, a smile lingering underneath. "You want me to go on a date with you?"

"I was thinking it would be good. I want you to get to know me all over again."

Her cheeks still pink, she smiles fully now and nods. "I'd like that a lot."

"Alright, it's date then. Tomorrow night."

"Okay, it's a date." She repeats, still smiling. And now I find it even more difficult not to kiss her.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

(Madge POV)

A date. Gale Hawthorne just asked me out on a date! I'm ridiculously excited, especially if you consider the fact that technically, we're already married. But I cant help but be excited. As far as I can remember, this is my first date ever! And it's with Gale Hawthorne! I feel like one of those silly girls from school that used to swoon at his feet just at the mere sight of him. And I kind of like how it feels. I know I blushed three shades of pink when he asked me. I'd had to bite my lip to keep from smiling so big. It's good, this feeling, this happiness.

Earlier that evening, while Gale was still at work, Tripp and I had been watching the video of the games. We hadn't made it through all of it. Not even close. The video wasn't just of the games, but also of reapings and interviews and training scores. We made it through the final pre-games viewing, the one with the interviews. I'd looked amazing in a blue gown and sapphire necklace. I do notice that my dress, once again, is covered in ruffles. I must have had the same stylist for my wedding as I did in the games. In the interview, when Ceaser asked me about Gale, I'd spoken so eloquently about how in love we were. And it didn't look as if I was exaggerating one bit. I'd wondered as I watched myself, the unfamiliar version of me, how it really felt to be so in love. Was it every bit as wonderful as I made it sound in that interview?

We'd decided to call it a night on the videos because it seemed like a good stopping point and he'd left just a few minutes before Gale returned. I figure I'll finish watching the videos tomorrow. My attention now is on Gale. Ever since he came home and asked me to go on a date, I can't stop staring at him. And I think he might be noticing. And it's so embarrassing!

"So how was work?" I ask, trying to talk instead of stare.

"Ehh, it was work. Dishwashing all afternoon. How about you?"

"The Medical Center? It was okay. There's an infection in my head wound where the stitches are. They gave me some medicine for it. And I met with my therapist. I like him I think. Oh, and they gave me a video of the games to watch."

"You're going to watch the games?" He asks looking horrified.

"Yeah. My therapist and I discussed how it may be helpful for me to see the me I can't remember. I already started watching it with Tripp earlier. I invited him to watch since he was in there with me."

"How far into them did you get?" He asks. I notice his face tighten a little but I'm not sure why. Perhaps just mentioning the games angers him.

"Only as far as the final pre-game interviews. The next video is the actual start of the games."

"Interview huh? You looked so stunning that night. That dress…it was perfect." He tells me, his face breaking into a slight smile as he recalls seeing me on the stage with Caesar.

"You think so? I loved the blue color but I guess I must have had the same stylist for the games as I did for our wedding because it was covered in ruffles again."

"When are you going to watch the rest of it?"

"I don't know. Tomorrow I guess. I don't have to go to the Medical Center so I may as well make use of my free time." I shrug.

"Oh."

"You can watch it with me, if you want to I mean." I tell him, unsure if he would want to see it. And for him, it would be seeing it again, since like Marah, he already endured it once.

"I'd like that." He tells me, his eyes staring at me, like he's thinking something but not saying it.

"Me too." I say, almost so quietly I think he might not hear me. But when I look up, he's still staring, a smile on his face and then I'm almost certain he did hear me after all.

As we get ready for bed, I notice him take a pillow from the bed and put it in the floor. I can't let him sleep down there again. "Um, Gale? You can sleep in the bed too if you want. I know the floor isn't very comfortable and it's cold."

"Are you sure? I don't mind the floor if it makes you more comfortable." He asks me hesitantly.

"Don't be ridiculous." I say, feeling embarrassed and just wanting him to turn out the lights so this conversation can be over. Thankfully, he does just that.

I crawl under the covers and lay my head back on my pillow. I'm very aware of Gale being under the blanket, lying next to me though he isn't touching me or even lying too closely.

"Goodnight Madge."

"Goodnight Gale." I whisper back to him.

(Gale POV)

As Madge gets showered so we can go to breakfast, I lay back, hand behind my head, and think back at how great last night was. She'd given me permission to sleep in the bed with her. Not in the way I would want of course as I couldn't hold her or anything but it was progress. Big time progress. She isn't scared of me. I'd made sure to stay on my side of the bed just in case she had second thoughts once we were both under the same blanket. But she didn't. Or if she did, she never said it or showed it. After she'd whispered goodnight to me, I'd layed awake for at least an hour, listening to her breathe so softly as she slept and then just as I'd been about to doze off myself, she'd said something. Not to me, but in her sleep, as she was dreaming. But it was what she said that kept me awake for another hour out of sheer happiness alone. Gale. She'd mumbled my name. At first, I'd thought she'd woken up but then I realized she was just dreaming. Apparently about me. My heart soared to a whole new level. I'd hoped she'd say more, listened closely hoping to hear more words cross those precious lips of hers. But she hadn't. And eventually, I'd fallen asleep.

This morning, I'd woken up before her and for just a few minutes, let myself stare at her as she slept beside me. Her face was relaxed and calm, lips slightly parted. I'd reached over, wanting to touch her face but held back. Things were going good and I didn't want to ruin that by having her wake up to me touching her as she slept. Instead, I forced myself out of bed and into the shower. She was awake, sitting up in bed, smiling at me when I came out of the bathroom. Seeing this made an instant smile spread across my face.

Now, as she showers, I decide that I need to make our date something really great, something truly worthy of being her first date. But what in the world can I do stuck underground in 13? Katniss. I need to ask Katniss. She'll be able to give me an idea maybe. Whatever it is, it needs to be special and it has to be perfect.

"Ready to go eat?" I ask as Madge exits the bathroom. Even in all gray, she still looks radiant to me.

"Ready if you are." I say as I hop to my feet.

At breakfast, they give us the same old boring oatmeal that they've served every day. Again though, it's free food so I won't complain. It may not taste fabulous but it serves it's purpose. I'm licking my spoon clean when I spot Tripp across the cafeteria, staring at us. He sees me looking at him and he ducks his head and turns away but not before I notice a purpleish bruise across the front of his neck. Thankfully, Madge's back is to him so she doesn't see him. It would be difficult for her to understand right now why I can't stand him. Maybe later, much later, after her memory returns, I'll talk to her about what happened. what I overheard him saying and how I chose to respond to it. She won't be happy about it. I know that for certain. But I think maybe when she remembers everything, she'll at the very least understand what happened with my temper and Tripp.

"Yesterday, Tripp saw that I wasn't enjoying my bland breakfast and he snuck some cinnamon and sugar out for me. Made this goop taste so much better." Madge tells me, just making conversation.

"Did he now? How friendly of him." I ask sounding less than enthused. If she notices, she doesn't mention it.

We've taken to sitting alone, for now anyway, because it makes Madge more comfortable. My family stops by to greet us, but just briefly. Posy bounces up and down in front of Madge, prattling on about her school. I guess 13 has some sort of program for little kids her age and it's set up like regular school. And apparently, she loves it. Vick and Rory look less enthused about school. Especially Rory. But it's not just that, something else seems wrong. I try to catch his eye but he won't meet my gaze. Something is definitely up with him. With everything going on with Madge, I haven't had much time at all for my family. As my family says their goodbyes and begin to head off towards their daily activities, I know I need to say something to him. "Be right back." I tell Madge as I get up and dart after him.

"Hey, Rory, wait up a minute!" I call after him. He turns and sighs but does wait for me.

"What?"

"You alright? You seem funny."

He hesitates and then looks up at me. "Yeah, I'm fine. Gotta go though, don't wanna be late." He answers glumly before turning back the direction he was headed and continuing on his way, not waiting for a response from me.

I know he's lying to me but I let him go. I'll try to catch up with him later and see if he's okay. He'll talk when he's ready so I'll give him some time before I push him on it. Back at my table I see Madge is finished eating and waiting patiently for my return.

"Hey, thanks for waiting. You ready to go watch that video?" I ask, smiling down at her. She returns the smile and stands beside me. Out of the corner of my eye I notice Marah Krull, arms folded over her chest, shooting me a death look. I ignore her, as well as the urge I suddenly have to give her the finger, and lead Madge out of the cafeteria and back to our unit.

She turns on the video device and then settles onto the bed next to me to watch. It's weird watching this now that I know she survives it. Watching it firsthand wasn't quite as easy on the nerves. I watch as the tributes rise from the tubes onto their podiums, panicking at finding themselves surrounded by water. I glance over at Madge and she's leaning forward, arms resting on her knees, eyes wide and glued to the screen. And then I realize she doesn't know that she knows how to swim. This is the reaction she would have had in the arena if I'd never been able to teach her to swim. She looks terrified.

And then the gong sounds bringing my eyes back to the screen as I watch her dive effortlessly into that blue water. I quickly turn my eyes back to her and she has her head cocked to the side in confusion and she turns to me.

"I…I can swim?"

"And you do it so very well. Impressive, huh?" I ask with a smile.

She nods, stares back at the screen and then back at me again. "How? I mean, did you…"

"Yeah. I taught you. Not for the games though, just for fun. Water in the arena was just a coincidence." I explain when she's so stunned that she can't even form a sentence.

She nods but doesn't say anything, just looks back and keeps watching. Her face is full of bewilderment as she sees herself throwing all the weapons and supplies into the ocean. "How did I get so, so confident and bold?" She practically whispers in way that tells me it isn't really a question for me to answer but just her thinking out loud.

She watches for a little while, every now and then, murmuring thoughts out loud to herself. She's completely engaged in the video, leaning forward, close to the screen. I find myself watching her and her reactions more than the video itself. When it comes up on the part where that monster creation is about to attack her, I reach up and pause it.

"Um, you may not want to watch this next part." I warn her.

"Why?"

"It's a little bit violent."

"But, they already told me I didn't kill anyone." She protests.

"You don't. This is different. It's what happened to your face and it's pretty gruesome to watch."

Her hand reaches up and delicately runs over the puffy pink scars that cross her face. After a minute, she looks at me. "No, I think I should watch. I want to see."

I lean forward and start the video again. I watch her only, not needing to see that horrific nightmare again. When it's over, she pauses it again and then just stares straight ahead at the screen.

"Madge?" I ask as I timidly move my hand closer to her, feeling the need to console her but not sure she would want me too.

"That was horrible." She utters so low I can barely hear her. Her chin quivers and I see tears brimming her eyes for a moment before she closes them. I go ahead and reach my hand out, placing it over hers. When she doesn't flinch away from me, I keep it there, gently stroking her hand.

"I know it was. But it's okay. You're okay now."

Her eyes flash open angrily. "Am I though? Because it sure doesn't seem like it to me!" She spits at me.

I hadn't expected this spark of anger and instinctively my hand retracts and I move back a bit. When she sees that, she softens and buries her face in her hands. "I'm sorry. That wasn't about you." Her muffled, sobbing voice tells me.

"It's okay. You're allowed to be angry." I tell her, excusing her outburst.

"Maybe. But it still isn't okay for me to take out my anger at you. I didn't mean it to be that way. I just don't have control over my emotions very well these days. It's something I'm working on."

"Madge, it's okay. Really. I'm full of temper and rarely able to control it. Believe me, if anyone can sympathize with flashes of anger, it's me." I tell her, giving her a smile. I really want her to know that it is okay for her to be angry. Or upset or happy or whatever she feels. I don't want her to feel like she has to hide or edit herself around me. Ever.

"You seem pretty in control of your temper to me." She observes giving me a skeptical look.

"Not always. We've had a few fights about my temper. Thankfully, you've forgotten them." I tell her, adding the joke on the end to hopefully lighten the mood.

She wipes the tears from her eyes and smiles the tiniest of smiles at my joke. "We had fights?"

"Well, just a couple. But that's all part of it, you know? The good, the bad, the amazing. All of it comes as one package deal."

"I think I've seen enough videos for this morning. Tell me about this date you're taking me on tonight." She says as she reaches over and turns off the device.

"Nuh-uh. Nope. It's a surprise."

"Seriously? You aren't going to tell me anything?"

I shrug. "You'll just have to wait and see. Speaking of dates, I have some prep work to do for that. Mind if I disappear for a little while? I can try to hurry and be finished in time to eat lunch with you before work."

"Okay, keep your little secrets. Make me suffer if you must." She teases dramatically.

"It'll be worth it, I promise."

"I hope so! And don't rush back just on account of me. Just do whatever top secret prep work you need to do and I'll just see you tonight for our date."

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine. I know where to find you if I need you."

"Alrighty then, guess I'll see you tonight. Meet you back here tonight as soon as I get off work." I tell her with a sneaky smile.

I leave in search of Katniss and I really hope I can find her. I have an idea and I'll need her help to make it happen. But if I can find her, if I can get her to help me, it'll be perfect. Absolutely perfect.

I finally track Katniss down in the Defense Center. Because of the security level here, they make me wait at the front desk and have her come out to see me instead of me going back to see her. I can't talk to her here with no privacy though so I have to ask her to take a break. Luckily, she can take one and we walk to a nearby, empty corridor.

"So what's up?"

"I need a huge favor and because I'm your very best friend in the whole world, you have to do it for me."

"Oh geez, if you're laying it on that thick, it must be something huge. What do you want?"

"It is huge. I want to take Madge out on a date tonight. A first date. And it has to be perfect. I have an idea but I need your help to pull it off."

"You want to take your wife out on a date?"

"Well, yeah. But she doesn't remember us dating or as a couple or even as friends for that matter. Peeta thought it would be good to take her out, let her get to know me again. I already asked her to go out with me and she said yes and seemed really excited about it. Please, you have to do this for me!" I beg.

"Peeta, huh?" She smirks.

"Yes, now will you help me or not?" I ask impatiently.

"Of course I'll help you. Tell me what all you need me to do." She says as she rolls her eyes. Hearing her say yes makes me so happy that I grab her and pull her into a hug after which she shoots me a look that tells me I shouldn't do that again. She isn't the huggy-lovey type. And she tells me to get my enthusiasm under control.

After she and I go over all the details of my plan and she tells me she'll have to pull Haymitch in on it but that she knows he'll be fine with it. She agrees to take care of everything and I have to once again fight the urge to hug her before I hurry off to work.

Work goes by so painfully slow that I think I might never get out if this dreadful kitchen and get to my date with Madge. And it's all I think about all afternoon. On our break, I tell Peeta about it and he thinks she'll love it. He does me one better and offers to bake something for her too. He isn't sure what he'll be able to do but he tells me to come see him before I leave work and he'll have something for me to give her. Once dishes are finally all washed and my area cleaned up, I find Peeta.

"It's just simple sugar cookies. Don't have much to work with back here." He explains as he hands me two heart shaped cookies wrapped in a cloth napkin.

"No, it's perfect. Thanks so much. For the date idea and for the cookies, for everything. You have no idea how much I appreciate this."

"Anytime, glad I could help. Now go get to that date of yours, don't want to keep her waiting!" He tells me with a smile.

And I do exactly as he says, heading home to Madge just as fast as I can, taking the stairs two at a time in the hopes it will get me to her that much faster. Once I reach our door, I pause for a moment and take a deep breath. All my excitement has now been joined by nervousness and I feel like I'm about to take her on our very first date all over again.

**_A/N: Okay, okay, please don't kill me for making you wait for the actual "date" chapter! It's coming in the very next chapter, I promise! And it'll be worth the wait! Thanks as always for all your kind reviews and continued support of this story!_**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

(Gale POV)

After I calm my nerves down, I punch the code on the keypad and let myself in. When she hears the door open, Madge appears in the doorway of the bathroom, smiling at me.

"Hey there." I say, not able to wipe the smile from my face. She looks amazing as ever. Hair pulled up and I'd swear she has gloss on her lips though I have no idea where she would've gotten it from.

"Hey." She replies as she leans against the doorframe.

"You ready?"

She takes a deep breath, from nervousness I think, and nods her head. Part of me wants to take her hand as we walk but I'm too unsure about it so I hold back. It would ruin everything if I were to scare her off before the date even begins.

"So now will you tell me where it is you're taking me?"

"Nope."

"Aww, come on! You've gotta give me something here!" She pleads.

"Sorry, no can do. Trust me though, it'll be worth the wait."

"I've been dying all day!" She confesses, guilty grin on her face.

"It'll be worth it." I say again, glad she's been as excited about this as I've been.

We take the elevator down several floors and when we get off, Katniss is waiting for us.

"Alright, here's your temporary passes. You have 3 hours clearance, thanks to Haymitch. It's closed right now so you'll have the whole place to yourself, no workers getting in your way or anything. Anyway, have fun, I'll see you later." She tells us holding out the temporary passes I'd asked her to get for us.

"Thanks, I owe you one." I tell her gratefully as I take the passes and she slips onto the waiting elevator. Before the doors of the elevator close, we share a glance and she smiles. I'm so thankful she was able to help make this date happen.

I turn to Madge and she's looking at me suspiciously, trying to figure out just what it is we're about to do. Before she even has a chance to ask me any questions, I pull a dish towel I swiped from work out of my pocket and hold it up to her. "Okay, you have to put this on."

"What?"

"Gotta blindfold you. Makes for a better surprise."

She pauses, eyeing the blindfold cautiously and I have a split-second moment of panic thinking I took it too far with the blindfold but then she turns around, back to me as she holds up the towel to her eyes and says, "Well, if it's for the element of surprise then I guess I have no choice in the matter. Help me tie it."

"That's the spirit." I say as I blindfold her. I love that she's willing to play along with me on this. "Okay, we have a little bit of a walk and there's some stairs too but just listen to me and I'll make sure you don't fall or anything." I tell her as I go over to the door and punch in the code Katniss wrote on my pass.

"Alright, lead the way." She says as she blindly holds out her hand for me to take it. Smile still on her face.

I stare down at her hand before I take it and lead her through the door and down some stairs. I'd of course wanted to hold her hand and help lead her down the stairs but I was prepared to just talk her through it or let her hold onto my arm or sholder if that made her more comfortable. The hand though, that's a good sign.

"Do I hear water running?" She asks me as we make our way down the final flight of stairs.

"You don't hear a thing. And I'm not telling you anything yet." I tease. She's right though. Water is pouring down the walls all around us, pooling in the center of the enormous room.

She gets the most adorable pouty look on her face and I have to choke down a laugh.

"I heard that." She says pointing out that my stifled laugh didn't go unnoticed, blindfolded or not.

"Okay, I'm gonna let go for a second but don't move an inch and don't you dare peek!" I instruct her. I wait for a second to be sure she won't move and then I go over to where Katniss set up the media player I'd asked for and turn on the music before I hurry back over to Madge and untie the blindfold.

She looks around for what feels like an eternity and her eyes look up at me. "What is this place?"

"It's the water reservoir for 13. This is where all the melted snow and rain from above ground runs down and collects before it gets sent through the filtration system and filled into tanks for use."

"And we're allowed to be down here?"

"Katniss works in the Defense Center and they can get clearance for pretty much every part of 13. I begged her for this favor. Wanted someplace special for our first date. If we'd been back home in 12, I would've taken you to the woods or the lake. Figured this would get us pretty close."

"I like it. It's like being by a waterfall or something." She says softly as she sits down on the blanket that's spread out on the concrete landing. "Can we touch it?" She asks me.

I nod. "Go ahead. I warn you, it's cold though." And I watch as she timidly leans over and reaches down and dips a pointed finger in the water. She shrieks and pulls it back laughing.

"Told you so." I taunt playfully as she rubs her hands together trying to erase the cold of the water.

"How'd you even know this place existed?"

"Saw it briefly when we got our tour of 13. You should take one of those yourself, you know. It's astounding what they've manage to build here, how they make use of every single thing they have."

"Maybe I will."

"I have one more surprise for you." I say as I pull out the heart shaped cookies and present them to her.

"Oh my gosh, are those real cookies?" She exclaims in excitement.

"Yeah. Had them made just for you."

"You have no idea how much I've been wanting something sweet like this!" She tells me as she closes her eyes, taking a bite.

"Glad you like it." I tell her as I watch her enjoying the cookie. This is going really good so far.

"Here, don't you want one?" She asks as she pushes the other cookie towards me.

I shake my head slightly. "No, those are just for you."

She gives me a look, breaks it in half and holds part out to me. I take it, if only because I like the gesture. And because part of me knows that she won't take no for an answer.

"The music is a nice touch." She comments.

I realize she doesn't know that I learned how to dance so I stand up and hold out my hand to her. She leans her head to the side as she takes my hand and stands.

"Gale Hawthorne dances?" She says with raised eyebrows.

"Only for Madge Hawthorne." I say softly as I gently place one hand on her waist and pull her towards me, careful not to get too close for her comfort level but close enough to still dance with her. As we waltz around to the music, I keep my eyes on her the whole time. Her eyes meet mine and she bites her bottom lip, then smiles.

"You're pretty good at this. Did I teach you?"

"Uh, no. Peeta taught me so I could surprise you at our wedding. But trust me, I would much rather have had you teach me."

She stops dancing because she's laughing so hard. "I..I'm sorry! I know I shouldn't be laughing, it's just I never would have pictured Peeta Mellark teaching Gale Hawthorne how to waltz!"

"And what would you have pictured Gale Hawthorne doing?" I ask, laughing myself as I remember how awkward it'd been dancing with Peeta.

"Not dancing with boys, that's for sure. I don't know really. You were always kind of a mystery to me."

"No, tell me. I wanna hear."

"Well, I knew you were always hunting, always out in the woods whenever possible. Kind of like you weren't afraid of getting into trouble. And I noticed more than a few girls falling at your feet regularly, which you didn't seem to have much of an issue with."

"So you think all I did was hunt and flirt with girls?"

"Well, isn't that what you did?"

"Alright, alright, I think we both can see I've expanded my interests a little since before you were in my life." I concede.

"Seems like that goes for both of us. But I should maybe give you more credit than just hunting and girls. I remember watching you with your family and you always seemed so happy around them."

"You were watching me? When was this?" I ask, not having heard about this before.

She blushes and looks away from me. "I don't know."

"Oh yes you do! Come on, out with it!" I tell her, grinning big and letting her know she isn't getting away with not fessing up to watching me.

"Just at school or at the viewings of Katniss's games. Like the one were you didn't have any shoes on. Do you remember that one? Well, because of Prim I was sitting with your family and I remember watching you with Posy. She fell asleep in your arms and you carried her home like that. It was easy to see that your family was important to you."

"I remember that day."

"Me too. You were mean to me every single time I saw you that day. I never could figure out why you hated me so much."

"Hey, I know I was mean but trust me when I say I didn't hate you. A lot of that wasn't even about you."

"What was it about then?"

I hesitate because I hate thinking about how rude I used to be to her but then again, this is exactly what I wanted. A chance to talk to her and for her to get to know me. The current me. The new me. The one that isn't ugly to her. "Well, for starters, when I was rude after you bumped into me with your bag of groceries, that was more about how it made me angry to see you buying stuff for dessert while I was struggling to feed my family of five plus Prim and Mrs. Everdeen. It was a lot on my shoulders and it was just an inopportune time for me to see you with a sack full of luxuries, you know?"

"That makes sense. I can't imagine how hard it would be to be so young and have all that responsibility." She says, nodding in what looks like honest understanding.

"And when you noticed I didn't have shoes on, I was short with you because I was embarrassed that you'd noticed. It made me defensive."

"Gale? Why didn't you have on any shoes? If it's okay for me to ask."

"I always want you to ask me anything. It's always okay, I promise. And I was barefoot because when I'd gotten home from school that day, I found out Vick's shoes had lost their sole and we had to glue it back on. The glue had to set all night and he didn't have another pair of shoes to wear in the meantime. I couldn't let him go into town being the only one barefoot. I did it to support him, to make him feel better. And it wasn't the least bit embarrassing until this pretty girl noticed and pointed it out to me."

She blushes again when I call her pretty and I realize I haven't yet told her how pretty she looks tonight. "By the way, you look just as pretty tonight. Really pretty."

This only serves to make her blush deeper and she bites her lip again. "Thank you." She whispers.

It's quiet between us for a moment before she speaks again, returning us to our previous conversation. "One more thing about that day since we're already on the subject of it…Later on that same night, like in the middle of the night, I saw you in the meadow and you were mean then too. What'd I do that time to bother you?"

"Oh Madge, you weren't bothering me. You never bother me. So you really want to hear about that night? The whole story?"

She nods. I hadn't wanted to tell her this one particular story again. Wanted to keep it for myself but maybe I should tell her. Maybe she'll be happy knowing it again. "I'd gone for a walk and then laid down in the meadow to kinda clear my head of all the mounting stress and I was so exhausted that I fell asleep. As you remember, you spotted me laying there and thought something was wrong and rushed right out to help me. And then I woke up to find you standing over me, staring at me, and again, I was rude to you out of my own embarrassment."

"How is me finding you asleep in the meadow embarrassing?"

"That's the best part. I was dreaming about you." I admit to her, feeling a little embarrassed now even though somewhere in her mind, she already knows this story.

"But…but your lips, they were… you were kissing…" She stutters out in astonishment.

"Yeah, I know. Totally embarrassing, right? To be dreaming that you're kissing this outrageously gorgeous girl only to wake up and find that very girl standing over you? I was mortified." I tell her. I leave out the whole thing about the nightgown with the ruffles. I still want to keep that to myself for now.

Her mouth turns up at the corners as she smiles at me, taking in what I just told her. "I can't believe you had a dream about kissing me before we were ever even friends."

"Yep. I couldn't believe it either when it happened. I mean, I always knew who you were, it wasn't like I didn't notice you or think that you were nice to look at but it was around this time when I for whatever reason started becoming very intrigued by you. Like you'd cross my mind at the most random of times. Not that I would've admitted it to you back then though."

"Really?"

"Mmmhmm." I murmur. We're sitting on the blanket now, facing each other and she's doing that thing where she bites her bottom lip again. And it makes it really difficult not to lean in and kiss her right now. I don't think I was this nervous the first time I kissed her. I wait though. Somehow, someway, I wait.

"Okay, time to move on to the next part of the date." I announce as I get to my feet and reach my hands out to help her up.

"There's more?"

"Yeah, there is if you want there to be."

Her cheeks color a touch as she replies, "I want there to be." She says it so softly and tenderly that it makes my heart flutter. She's enjoying this. She likes being on this date with me and isn't ready for it to end yet. And what's more, after I helped her to her feet, she didn't let go of my hand. She keeps holding it.

"Me too." I say as I lead us back up all the stairs, looking back once over my shoulder at her to smile, her hand still tucked into mine.

After we leave the water reservoir, I take us to the Agriculture Center to the area where all the trees grow.

"This is where I've been coming when I miss the woods. It isn't the same but I like how the trees smell. Makes it feel less like we're stuck underground."

She closes her eyes and I watch as she inhales, taking in the smell. "It does smell nice. Like being at home almost."

I lead us over to a bench and sit down, still holding tight to her hand, afraid if I let it go for any reason that I won't get it back. "It's peaceful here, that's why I like it. And we don't have to have special passes to get in here."

We sit on the bench, side by side for the next hour or so just talking with each other. She asks me about things I like or dislike, shares with me about herself, most of which I of course already know but love hearing just the same. Eventually, she begins to yawn and I realize that as much as I never want this night to end, I should probably bring it to an end and get her home to bed.

"Looks like I better get you home before you fall asleep on me." I tell her as I stand up and pull her to her feet.

We walk in silence but it's an almost comfortable silence as opposed to the awkward ones we've had since we got to 13. The whole way back to our place, I try to decide if I have enough courage to kiss her or not. She's been so receptive to me all night but the fear of rejection has me really nervous and questioning if I should try or not. It's been such a perfect night that I'm scared to ruin it if she isn't ready for me to kiss her yet. As we get off the elevator and walk to our door, I decide I just have to do it. I have to kiss her. To end this date and not kiss her might actually kill me.

As we walk inside, I let the door close behind us but stay standing right by the door. It feels like the official end of the date place to me. I turn to face her and I'm standing so close to her, still holding her hand. Her bright blue eyes are wide and the way she's biting her bottom lip gives me the encouragement I need. I reach out and take her other hand too, intertwining our fingers.

"I had a really great time with you tonight." I whisper as I lean in closer to her face.

"Likewise." She whispers back. She's so close to me that I can feel her breath against my face as she speaks.

My heart is racing as I whisper back "I'm glad." And then before I can chicken out, I lean down and press my lips against hers. And it's the closet thing to heaven that I've felt in weeks.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

(Madge POV)

His lips pressed to mine, gently, lovingly and it was over all too quickly. When I open my eyes, his face is still near mine, eyes on mine. My heart is pounding and my knees feel weak, my head spinning. He just kissed me. And I liked it. I feel so floaty right now that I can't think to speak, my mouth won't form words and even if it could I doubt my voice could speak them.

He smiles as he lets go of one of my hands and brushes his fingers gently alongside my face. "I have to go turn our passes back in to Katniss. Be back shortly, okay?" He tells me softly.

I nod, still incapable of speaking and he stares at me a moment longer before he squeezes my other hand once before letting it go as he leaves. As soon as the door shuts, I melt to the floor. I just had the best night of my life and it was with Gale Hawthorne. He'd put so much thought into our date and definitely gone out of his way to make it special for me from start to finish. Even now, him leaving to go return those passes, I have my suspicions that it was merely an excuse so that I could have a moment alone after he kissed me. A moment to let it sink in without worrying about feeling bashful. And I'm grateful for it.

It was a better date than I ever imagined it would be. The water reservoir was unique and private and the music playing added just the right amount of romance. And we danced! Gale knows how to dance! I know I must have blushed when he commented that he only dances for "Madge Hawthorne". Hearing it, my new name, from his lips, in that way, it was surreal. It sounded melodic and right. For the first time, it sounded right to me. I'd wanted to tell him that, wanted him to know what I thought, but I couldn't find the right words in my head and so I didn't.

He was so gentle, so careful all evening. Never once crossing any invisible lines that might make me uncomfortable. He'd sat and talked to me on that bench under the trees for so long. I never in all my years would have thought we'd be able to hold such conversation. I can't believe he has this whole other side to him that I never knew existed, all these years. There's something alluring about seeing him like this. Something that makes me want more. More conversations with him. More date nights. More kisses. More of him.

I get up from the floor and change into my sleep shirt before slipping into bed. You couldn't wipe the smile from my face if you tried right now. No wonder those silly girls from school all acted this way when they liked a boy. This, this happy, floaty feeling, it's like nothing I've experienced before.

I drift off to sleep as I wait for Gale to return. I'm vaguely aware of him returning and getting into bed a little while later. In my groggy state, I try to open my eyes and sit up to talk to him more but he, in his softest voice, stops me.

"Shhh, it's just me. Go back to sleep."

I feel his hand lightly stroke the side of my face as he says this. His voice sounds happy and relaxed. I close my eyes and begin to let myself drift back off to sleep but not before I take my own hand and reach it out to his.

The next morning when I wake up, still consumed with delight from last night's date with Gale. Our hands still folded together between us in bed. He isn't awake yet so I lie here, still as I can, and watch him sleep. As I lay here, my mind thinks about how it may be possible for me to be happy even if I never get my memory back. Obviously, I'd give anything to have it but should I never get it back, I think I'll still be able to be happy. I think I'll still be okay with this life. And a few days ago, that had been one of my inimitable fears-that I would never regain my memory and be trapped in a life I didn't desire. Now, after just one date, just one kiss, I feel like everything did a complete turn around.

"Morning." Gale says, startling me from my daydream. I'd been so lost in thought that even though I was looking at him, I hadn't noticed that he'd woken up.

"Hi." I say back, feeling giddy and bite my lip to try and control the butterflies that fill my stomach.

He grins and taps the tip of my nose with his fingertip. "Sleep good?"

"Mmhmm. Too good maybe. I think we might miss breakfast if we don't get up soon." I tell him as I suddenly notice the time on the clock, realizing we slept much later than usual.

"That's alright. I don't mind missing a bowl of lukewarm oatmeal. I'd much rather sleep in and wake up like this." He says, not moving from his pillow.

I again have to bite my lip to keep from over-smiling. I feel his thumb move back and forth across the back of my hand where it intertwines with his.

"Do you have to go to the Medical Center today?" He asks me.

I do. I have zero desire to get up and go right now though. Doing that means this moment has to end and right now, that's the last thing I want to happen. "I'm supposed to go let them check my stitches again. And then I have to meet with my therapist." I grumble.

He chuckles a little and then sits up, pulling me upright as well. "Aww, don't go getting grumpy on me. I'll walk down there with you if you want some company."

"You don't have anything you have to do this morning?"

"I want to go see my family but other than that, no plans at all. Then I have work this evening of course. But I can still walk you to the Medical Center before I go see my family, I don't mind."

"Okay. I'd like that." I tell him as I get up and head for the bathroom to get changed. Before I close the bathroom door I catch one last glance of him as he sits in bed, grinning from ear to ear. He's practically beaming he's so happy.

By the time we're both showered and dressed, we've definitely missed breakfast and I'm going to be about 5 minutes late for my appointment at the Medical Center. As we walk down there, Gale reaches out and takes my hand in his. This feels so natural to me now and it amazes me that it does. There's something safe about it. Something that makes me feel protected and cared for.

Once we arrive, we stand outside the door for a minute before I go check in at the front desk. A huge part of me is hoping that he'll kiss me again but terrified that he will all the same.

"Meet you for lunch in the cafeteria?" I ask him.

"See you soon." He smiles at me as he lets go of my hand and taps the tip of my nose again before turning and heading back to the elevators. My heart sinks a little. No kiss this time. But that's probably for my benefit. I've been so standoffish to him since I woke up in this place without my memories that he probably doesn't want to push his luck by trying to kiss me again. It's a respectable gesture but it leaves me longing just the same.

When I check in at the front desk, they send me straight back to see the Medic since I'm already running late. As I make my way down the hallway to the exam room, I bump into Tripp.

"Hey, what are you doing down here?"

He looks at me funny for a minute and then shrugs. "Just getting a bruise checked out." As he says this, I catch sight of the bruise and my hand goes to my mouth. The whole front of his neck is tinged purple and blue.

"Oh my goodness! What on earth happened to you? Are you okay?"

He sighs. "It was just a little misunderstanding I had with some guy. And I'm totally fine. I only came down here to get it checked out because Marah wouldn't shut up about it."

"Someone did this to you intentionally?" I ask in horror. Who would do such a thing to someone so kind?

"I seriously do not want to talk about it. It's nothing, I swear." He says, not looking me in the eye and his face covered in frustration.

I realize I'm being a little rude and apologize. "Of course, I'm sorry."

He shakes his head as if to forget about it. "I gotta get going. Had to leave work to come down here. I'll see you around."

"Bye." I call after him as he leaves without saying anything back. He doesn't seem like himself at all. What happened, I wonder? Who could possibly have done this to him? Whatever it was, he's obviously embarrassed about it and I assume that's why he's acting so funny right now.

After the Medic examines and scolds me for my tardiness, she lets me know that my wound seems to be responding to the medicines and no longer shows signs of infection. If it continues this way, I should be able to remove the stitches sometime next week. From there, I go meet with Ren. I find him, waiting patiently in his chair.

"Hi, I'm sorry for being late. It won't happen again." I apologize as I slip into my waiting chair.

"Oh no worries." He says with a wave of his hand. I guess his schedule isn't as tight as the medic's was. "So tell me, how are things going since we last spoke?"

"Well, good actually." I reply as I know my cheeks blush. "Gale and I, we went on a date."

"That sounds positive. Tell me about it?"

"It was good. I liked being able to talk to him and get to know him. It was comfortable, didn't feel forced or awkward. And I definitely feel more comfortable around him now."

"I like what I'm hearing. And what about the games? Have you begun to watch those yet?"

"Yes, I have. Still not finished, but making my way through them a little at a time. I had Tripp Krull, he was my tribute mate, watch the pre-games with me. And Gale watched with me after that."

"Was any of it difficult for you?"

"Yes. In different ways. I found out that Tripp had been a volunteer and that it had been on my behalf. He apparently cared very much for me and when Gale's younger brother was reaped, he didn't want me to have to go into the games with a family member and didn't want Gale to volunteer and me have to go in with him. That was difficult because now I feel like I'll always owe Tripp my gratitude. That was a massive sacrifice for him to have made for me and without my memory, it's hard to be the friend to him that I apparently had become before the games."

"And what else was difficult?"

"The Capitol Mutt that attacked me. Gale tried to stop me from watching but I just felt like I needed to see it for myself. And then I was sorry that I had. It was awful. I…I could have been killed!"

"But you weren't. You survived."

I nod. "I know but it still isn't easy to watch."

"The games never are dear. They never are." He says sadly and knowingly. I wonder to myself if he at one point lost someone in the games.

"So what's my next assignment?"

"I'd like for you to continue watching the games if you can tolerate it. Having someone with you is a good idea and I'd like for you to continue that if possible. Keep trying to get to know Gale. Forget about trying to be his wife but rather just get to know the real him and let yourself become comfortable with him. Do what feels natural. Your instincts are there, you just need to rouse them a bit. And I'd recommend the same with Tripp. Learn to be his friend again by just getting to know him and let things fall together as they may."

"I can do that." I say confidently with a smile.

"I know." He replies knowingly with a confident smile of his own.

(Gale POV)

I float on cloud nine all the way to see my family. Last night had been every bit as perfect as I'd hoped it would be. The whole thing, start to finish had been amazing. It really felt like I was dating her again. Not just spending time with each other because we were married and expected to do so but it felt like we were both there because we wanted to be. Because there wasn't any place in the world either of us would rather have been.

And that kiss. Oh man, that kiss. It was perfect and exactly what I would want her first, well first remembered kiss, to be. My lips had pressed into hers, quickly but softly, lingering only a second before I pulled back. Her eyes had closed and when they reopened, sparkled blue and her cheeks burned pink. I'd used every ounce of restraint I could muster to keep from pushing her against the door and kissing her again. I mean really kiss her. But I have to be patient and I have to move slowly. This is all very new and uncertain to her right now and pushing it won't win her over. And because I love her so much, I'll be patient forever, if that's how long it takes.

When I'd come back from returning the passes to Katniss, I'd found Madge sleeping already. I'd left mostly so she could think about that kiss and about our date privately. If we weren't married, she would have been able to do just that had it just been any normal date. And I didn't want to deny her of that. So I left on my errand, grinning like an idiot all the way to Katnniss's room and then back to ours. I'd tried to climb into bed without waking her but she stirred a little, groggily opening her eyes and moving to sit up. I'd stopped her though, she needed to sleep. I'd been tempted to kiss her again, maybe just on the forehead, I'd thought, but instead just reached over as she closed her eyes and run my fingers over the side of her face. She was just so damn beautiful. And then she'd surprised me by reaching out and placing her hand into mine. I'd closed my hand around hers and fallen asleep, finally feeling like things were once again becoming right with my world.

Then, this morning, there she was, still holding my hand, sort of lost in a daydream as she stared at me. Neither of us wanted to get up. Neither of us ready to be apart from one another. She'd let me walk her, hand in hand, all the way down to the Medical Center. As we said goodbye outside that door, I'd again wanted so terribly to just lean down and kiss her face again but I held back. Always with the little voice in the back of my head telling me to go slowly. Telling me that all of it would be worth the wait if I could just be patient and give her time to fall in love with me again.

Now, I'm on my way to see my family. I knock at their door and wait as I hear little feet scampering inside. Posy I think. Probably can't reach the keypad to open the door. I hear bigger footsteps and then keypad buttons being pushed before the door opens, revealing a sour looking Rory and a very hyper Posy.

"Gale!" Posy shrieks as she launches herself into my arms, hugging my neck.

"Hey, Pose. Whatcha up too?"

"Nothing. We don't haftta go to school today."

"I know. Where's ma and Vick?" I ask her, noticing Rory sulking back over to the bed and sitting down, flipping through a book.

"She' at work. Vick is over at his friend's house."

I put her down and walk over to the bed and sit across from Rory. Posy goes back to coloring in a book with a bright red crayon. Rory ignores me.

"Hey, what are you up too?" I ask, gently kicking his foot to get his attention.

"Reading. Can't you see?" He snips without looking up at me. And it makes my blood boil. What the hell is his deal?

"Hey! What's your problem?" I bark at him.

"You are. Did I not make that obvious?" He again snips.

"What the hell did I do to you?"

Posy drops her crayon at my cursing and I look up to see her staring at us. I try to shoot her a smile but she still looks at me with worry.

"Sorry Pose." I tell her before turning my attention back to Rory. "Seriously, what did I do?"

He puts his book down and finally looks up at me, eyes glaring. "I know it was you. The one who did that to Tripp's neck. And I think that's pretty shitty of you."

'Hey! Watch the language! And as far as Tripp Krull is concerned, that's none of your business."

"See, that's where you're wrong. Because the way I see it, you did something really messed up and I'm calling you out on it."

"You don't know what happened and I don't need you to call me out on it."

"I know you hit him or whatever. And I know that he may not be telling people it was you but I'm not stupid. I know it was you."

"You're damn right it was me! And I'd do it again in a heartbeat! Do you wanna know what happened? Do you? That little shmuck and his sister were making plans for him to steal Madge from me. I heard him talking about it with my own two ears! He was making moves on MY WIFE!" I shout as the anger of all this takes over me. I hear Posey's crayon drop again and look over to see tears spilling down her face.. She hates when we fight. I'm about to go over to her when she gets up and runs into the other room, slamming the door behind her. I leave her be so I can finish this with Rory.

"Gale, what is the matter with you? Huh? Did you forget that just a few weeks ago that guy did the unthinkable and took my place in the games? Did you forget that part? Have you forgotten that already? Because I haven't, not at all. We owe him forever Gale, we do."

"Rory, I didn't forget that but did you hear what I just said? He was making a move on Madge!"

"Yeah, so what if he was? It's just as crappy of you even if he was."

"How so?"

"Because even if he was, you doing what you did, acting like that, it shows how little faith you have in Madge. How you don't trust her not to fall for him. And that's not the you I know at all."

I sit back, stunned at what he just said. Me hitting Tripp makes it look like I don't trust Madge. That wasn't it at all. Well, kind of but not really. I trusted her, I did. But she wasn't herself. She didn't know me or us how how great we were together. And she did know Tripp.

Rory continues as I sit before him, still silent. "And you know what else? When Madge finds out what you did, she's gonna go ballistic. She'll freak out. And it'll ruin whatever it is you hope she feels for you again. You have to tell her."

Tell Madge? Is this kid crazy? "No way!"

"Tell her before she finds out from someone else. Sure, she'll be angry just the same hearing it from you but at least that way you're being honest with her. If she finds out elsewhere, she'll feel like you deceived her. If that happens, you'll never recover. She'll never trust you again."

I lean back against the wall. He's right. There's no way Madge can hear about this from anyone but me. I have to tell her. And try my best to explain it to her, to get her to see that I did what I did out of fear. I stand and swallow. I look at Rory, still unable to speak and just nod once. He nods back, knowing what I mean. Knowing that I'll go and try to make this right. He gets up and heads for where Posy is so he can soothe things with her for us. And I leave, heading out to fix this mess, to make things right as best I can, if that's even possible.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

(Madge POV)

After leaving the Medical Center I head to the cafeteria to meet Gale for lunch. On my way, I find myself still smiling, still glowing from how wonderful last night was. I think I really may be turning into one of those silly girls who only thinks of being in love all the time. And I never would have imagined myself like that. Of course, I wouldn't dare say I'm in love with Gale. Not love. Not yet, it's much too soon for me to feel that. But there's no question for me now that I definitely like him. A lot. And if last night is any indication of possibilities, I could easily now picture myself falling head over heels in love with him.

When I arrive at the cafeteria, Gale is waiting for me outside the doors. I smile and wave excitedly. He smiles back and starts towards me but something looks wrong. He looks nervous.

"Hey! Ready to eat?" I ask chipperly, hoping I'm mistaken as to how he looks uneasy.

"Not just yet. There's something we need to talk about. Can you come with me for a minute?"

"Sure." I choke out, his uneasiness now spilling over to me. What do we need to talk about? It doesn't look good, whatever it is.

He takes my hand and leads me down the hall to the empty stairwell and sits down on the steps, me falling into place next to him.

"Well? What's going on?" I ask when he doesn't seem to know how to start the conversation.

"I need to let you know about something I did the other day that wasn't good and you won't like it." He begins.

Great. He's about to ruin all this wonderfulness we just started. I wish he wouldn't. I've had enough angst and grief since I got here and right now all I want is for the happiness of last night to last a little longer. I'm not ready to part with it yet. "Gale, if it's something bad, I'd honestly rather not even know about it. I'm happy for the first time in awhile and I'd really like to keep it that way." I tell him, hoping he'll take the out I'm offering up and we can just go have lunch as planned. He doesn't though.

"I'm really glad you're happy. You have no idea how much I needed to hear you say that, how much I need to know that." He smiles and leans over, kissing my forehead so lightly that I barely feel his lips against my skin. "But I have to tell you this because it's something I shouldn't have done and if you hear about it from someone else, you'll never forgive me."

Forgive him? He needs forgiveness? What happened that could be so bad he needs me to forgive him? Did he cheat on me? Surely not. I hope not. Oh please don't let that be what he has to tell me. Please don't let that be it. I nod at him so he'll continue.

"A few days ago, I was in the stairwell and overheard a conversation between Tripp and Marah Krull. A conversation talking about him taking advantage of your memory loss and making a move to get you to fall in love with him instead of with me. Tripp has loved you for a very long time and it isn't new information to me. What is new about it, is that I had for awhile trusted him not to ever act on that love, not to ever try and take you away from me and to hear this private conversation where it's being discussed that this may be the chance he never got and how he should try and win your love, well, it infuriated me to no end. And then all day, I stewed over it, growing angrier by the minute. When I came home that night, he was coming out of our house and I just lost it. I completely lost it on him."

I cut him off before he can say anything else. "You? You're the guy who did that to his neck?" I gasp in horror as I put two and two together. I yank my hand away from his, not wanting him to touch me.

"Yeah. I…I'm so sorry. I just got so angry with what he said and then to see him leaving our house where he'd been alone with you, I couldn't take it." He apologizes and his face looks as if he may cry at any given second.

"You hit him? How could you? How could you do that? Have you seen his neck? It's all bruised! Tripp was coming out of our house because I had invited him to watch the games, because I wanted him there, not because he had some ulterior motive! I can't believe you!" I say, climbing to my feet.

He quickly stands and grabs at my hand, pleading for me to stay. "Madge, please wait. Don't leave!"

"Don't leave?" I spit back at him as I jerk my hand away from his and look at him in disgust. "You think I want to be around you right now?" I ask incredulously.

"Please, just let me explain…" He continues to beg before I cut him off.

"I don't know you at all. And I'm not sure I want too." I say, tears stinging inmy own eyes as I turn and walk away without looking back at him. How could he do this? How could he physically hurt someone like that? And for what? Because he thinks he heard a conversation? Because he thinks he saw something he didn't? This is all my fault. Tripp getting hurt never would have happened if I hadn't invited him over to watch that video. I just had no idea Gale was so jealous, so crazed. Tripp must have though. He must have known because he'd specifically asked if it would be alright with Gale for him to come over. And I'd brushed it off as if it was no big deal. Because why would it be? Why would he care if I had a friend over? And even if Tripp has feelings for me, does Gale not trust me? Does he think that I'd cheat on him? I may not remember that I'm married but I do know that I am and I'd never go against the sanctity of that. I just wouldn't.

I storm furiously into the cafeteria and spot Tripp and Marah over at a table alone. I march right over to them. I have to apologize. "Tripp, I need to talk to you." I blurt out, tears still stinging my eyes.

They both look up at me and can see that I'm upset. Marah gets up immediately and mumbles something about having to go somewhere. She ducks off and I sit down across from Tripp. His neck looks so bad and just seeing it wracks me with guilt.

"You didn't tell me that Gale is the person who hurt you. I'm so sorry!"

"I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to know. How'd you find out?" He says quietly, looking down at the table.

"Gale just told me. I had no idea he would act like that. I didn't know that would happen and it's all my fault you got hurt, I am so, so sorry Tripp!"

He looks up at me and sighs. "Would you stop apologizing? It isn't your fault. It's my own fault and it was just a big misunderstanding."

"It is my fault! If I hadn't invited you over to watch the video this never would have happened." I insist as I lean forward across the table towards him.

"You don't know that Madge, you really don't know. Look, do you want to get out of here? There stuff you should know that I was hoping never to have to tell you but I guess now I'm gonna have to. It's the only way you'll be able to understand all this."

I nod at him and we both get up from the table. I have no clue what he has to tell me but I need to know, whatever it is. We walk, a decent sized and noticeable space between us on his part, until we come to a common area that's mostly empty. We sit down on a bench, away from everyone else and I stare at him, waiting.

Finally, he starts. "You can't be mad at Gale for what happened."

"Like hell I can't. Him hitting you? That's not an okay thing."

"I need you to just listen right now. Let me just get this all out before you talk, okay?"

"Sorry." I say quietly and nod for him to continue again.

"Gale had a reason to do what he did. A reason to feel threatened. Back when you two were dating, right when you got together, that was when I decided to try and get you to go out with me instead. You see, I'd thought you were the most incredible, most beautiful girl I'd ever seen for as long as I could remember. It was always you. I just never found the courage to act on it. And you never dated anyone so I figured I had plenty of time, you know? And then all of a sudden, in waltzes Gale Hawthorne. And before I knew what was happening, he had your heart in the palm of his hand. I panicked. I thought I just needed to show you that I could be just as charming as he was. Foolishly, thought that was all it would take. So, one day, I got to school really early and left this massive bouquet of sunflowers on your desk. Anonymously. And then I watched from afar as your whole face lit up when you saw them."

He pauses as if he's picturing this whole memory in his head before he tells me the rest of the story. "Anyway, I took off to find Gale and when I did, I boasted about how I'd stolen you away from him, about how I'd won. And he punched my lights out."

He again pauses, this time as I gasp, hand covering my mouth. Gale had done this before? This was a recurrent behavior for him?

"And he had every right to do that. I kinda had it coming. I mean, I knew you two were somewhat together and it was stupid of me to do what I did. After that, I never made a move again. Eventually, Gale and I came to a sort of unspoken agreement that he was comfortable with you and I being friends so long as I never crossed that line again. And for a very long time, that worked wonderfully. You two were happy and in love and you and I were close friends."

"What happened this time?"

"It really was a misunderstanding. Gale somehow heard me and Marah talking about you. I'd told her how you wanted to be friends and leave the past out of it so that you could have someone you didn't have memories to worry about with. She was all for it. Was telling me that this would be the chance I never got before to win you over. Like you having lost your memory and not knowing who Gale was somehow leveled the playing field for me. Like if I wanted to, I could try to get you to love me and not him. It was all Marah pushing though. It wasn't like I planned to act on it."

He stops talking and looks directly at me with the saddest but most sincere of eyes. "I would never do that to you. I wouldn't take advantage of you, ever. I promise I wouldn't."

"I believe you." I say softly. And I do, I really do believe him when he says this to me.

"So Gale, having heard all that talk about this being my chance, comes home from work to find me exiting your place. It's only natural that he'd flip out."

"Tripp, I can see why he would be upset but violence? That's unacceptable."

"He only did what he felt he needed to do. To protect you and what you have with him. I'm not mad. Embarrassed but not mad. I understand, I do. If you were my wife and the situation had been reversed, I'd probably have done the same thing."

"Why didn't you tell me that it was him who hurt you?"

"I'm not even really hurt. He never even hit me. He just held me against the wall and told me to stay away from you. His arm just left a bruise is all and it looks way, way worse than it is. And I didn't tell you because I didn't want to have to get into all of this, me explaining how I love you and how that makes your husband go insane."

"You love me?" Until now, all he's told me, I just assumed it was a very serious like, not love. Love is a whole other level.

"Is it that crazy of a notion?"

"No, not crazy. Just…unexpected."

"Well isn't that how love always is?"

"I don't know. I can't remember what it feels like to be in love."

"Trust me, if anyone knows what it feels like to be in love, it's you. You love Gale so much, so totally and completely. He's your whole world. Give him a chance again and it'll all come back to you. It will. Before you know what hits you, you'll be falling in love all over again."

I stare at him. Feelings of guilt now exchanged for sorrow and thankfulness. Sorry his love is unrequited. Thankfulness that he was able to reassure me about Gale with just a simple statement. His confidence in the love Gale and I share reassures me that being with Gale is right for me.

"Tripp…I wish I was able to tell you how much it means to me that you just had this conversation with me. I know it can't be easy for you."

"Any chance we can just let all this awkwardness disappear now and just be friends? No scheming sisters, no irate husbands, no weirdness between us? What do you say?"

"You've got yourself a deal my friend." I say with a grin as I hold out a hand so we can shake on it. He looks relieved and grips my hand, shaking it in return. And we have a deal. We'll be friends and we won't worry about anyone misunderstanding that. We'll make sure it's clear so there's never a question in anyone's mind.

"Now go find that husband of yours and forgive him already. He's gotta be going nuts right now." He says as he gently pushes me towards the cafeteria. His face has a smile on it and he looks like a burden has been lifted from his shoulders by having been honest with me about everything. But in his eyes, behind everything else, there's a sadness that tries to hide.

(Gale POV)

Her words cut into me so deeply that they took the breath right out of my lungs. I don't even know you and I'm not sure I want to. The last words out of her mouth before she stormed off. She wouldn't listen to me at all, wouldn't let me explain. But can I blame her for that? I already know that I can't. I knew before I ever told her that she'd be furious. I hadn't forgotten the last time I hit Tripp how angry she'd been at me. How we got in a fight and she'd thankfully forgiven me. Could she do it again? Was it even fair of me to ask that of her?

I stay in the stairwell as long as I can before I have to go to work. I try to pull myself together but I'm sure it registers all over my face that I'm a wreck. But how could I not be? I may have just thrown away my whole life because I let my temper get the best of me. How could I not have thought about that before I went and shoved him against the wall by the throat? Why didn't I think it all the way through? I'm so stupid. So stupid.

I suffer through work, thankful I don't have to interact with other people during work. I can't even stand myself right now and I can't imagine anyone else would want my company either. As soon as my shift ends, I hurry home, just wanting to talk to Madge. To fix this and make it all better. To try and do that. If that's even possible.

Outside the door though, I freeze. I don't know what I'll do if she won't talk to me. Or worse, what if she isn't even here? What if she's really done with me and she's gone? I hold my breath and open the door, closing my eyes, afraid I'll see the worst if I look to see if she's here.

When I gain enough courage to open them, I see her. She's here. Sitting crossed legged on the bed, staring at me. I catch my breath and try to make myself speak. "I wasn't sure you'd be here."

"I still live here." She says curtly. "And we aren't finished talking." She adds.

"I know. I have more to tell you. I want to explain it. I know that doesn't make it better but if you only knew the story behind it all, it might make more sense at least."

"I already heard the story. About how this isn't the first time you assaulted Tripp out of jealousy."

"He told you?" I ask as my heart sinks. She went to him and he told her everything before I could. Now I look like an ass and he looks like the innocent victim.

"Yes. But before you flip out about it, you should know that he was completely understanding of what you did and encouraged me to forgive you and let it go."

"And are you going to do that? Are you going to be able to forgive me?" I choke out, desperate for her to do just that.

She looks at me, studying my face. "I already did. "

Scared I haven't heard her correctly, I repeat what I think she said. "You already did?"

"I forgive you. But we do still need to talk about this. It is not okay with me for you to lose your temper to the point that you physically hurt someone. Especially when it's over me."

"I know. I won't let it happen again."

"And I need to know why you didn't trust me. Why you thought you would have anything to worry about, even if Tripp was planning to try and steal me away from you."

"Oh Madge, it isn't you that I don't trust. It's him. All this, it was just too familiar." I say as I sit down on the bed in front of her.

"No, there had to have been some part of you that was worried I would do something dishonest behind your back."

"I trust you, I do. But I do not trust him. See, I know what it's like to love you, how it makes you feel and how it takes over your soul completely. And right now, you're still deciding if you even want to be with me, so hearing some guy say what he did and knowing he loves you, it was just too much. Too scary to let happen. Because if it worked, if you decided that you'd rather be with him than me, it'd kill me."

"I'm not deciding about being with you Gale. It may be taking me some time to become comfortable around you and to get to know you again but I am with you." She explains quietly as she traces tiny circles with her fingers on the bed, not looking up at me.

I reach my fingers out to hers and take her hand. She's with me. Hearing her say it floods me with relief that I've needed so badly. She may not love me yet but she is with me and that's the most she can offer me right now which I'll take. Happily, thankfully, I'll take it. Madge is with me. "You have no idea how much I needed to hear you say that to me." My voice coming out so quiet and hushed.

She looks up at me, her hand still in mine. "I'm sorry that we fought." Her tiny voice tells me as she gives me an apologetic look.

I lean forward, doing the only thing that feels natural right now, and I kiss her. As I kiss her, I can feel her kiss me back, leaning into me, reaching for me. I let go of her hand and press my palms to either side of her face, kissing her deeper. When I pull back from the kiss, I leave my hands on her face. She's breathless and flushed. Blue eyes alive and thrilling. And then she does something I don't expect at all. She reaches forward, knotting my shirt in her fist, and pulls me to her lips, kissing me again.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

(Madge POV)

It had been so blissful the past few days between Gale and I that I am beginning to live for those little moments of shared kisses, intertwined hands and secret glances. And I mean really live for them. I'd find ways to prolong goodbyes and goodnights or rush through things I needed to do so that I could be waiting for him when he came out of work. It was as if suddenly, I just can't get enough of him.

My favorite thing though was getting to kiss him so much. Oh my word, he was such an incredible kisser. Not as if I had anyone to compare it too or anything but there was something about the way he made me feel when we kissed that just told me he was a natural at it. No wonder all those girls back in school raved about him. They weren't exaggerating at all, like I'd previously assumed. It was as if he had a talent for it or something. And now I got to reap the benefits of that talent whenever possible. Kissing Gale was better than I'd imagined. Whenever his lips pressed against mine, it was if I melted away, lost in the thrill of it all.

So far, kissing is as far as we taken things. Gale's been so patient. So unbelievably patient about letting things progress at a pace that would be comfortable for me as this was all new territory for me. Although as nervous as his touch had made me in the beginning, I knew it wouldn't be long before I wanted more. Before I wanted to move things along. Before I'd feel that need for him to not stop at just kissing my lips. Just thinking about it was enough to make me anxious. Both in an unnerving way and a good, exciting way.

Tonight was another date night for us. Being in 13 required that our date nights be somewhat creative as there were very few things a person could do here. Tonight, would be another surprise though. Gale had insisted on it, refusing to share even a snippet of a detail with me. Just be here when I get off work. And don't eat dinner. Those were his only instructions. The closest things to a hint that he was willing to offer me. So, while the rest of 13 was off enjoying another bland dinner in the cafeteria, I was pacing back and forth across our tiny living space, watching the minutes tick by in a painfully slow fashion.

Finally, I heard Gale pressing the keypad outside our door. I ran my fingers over my hair and smoothed out my top as I bit my lip, waiting for him to enter. When the door opened, he walked in, carrying a wooden storage crate that appeared to be pretty heavy.

"Hey Beautiful." He said as he leaned over the crate to press a kiss to my forehead.

"What's all that?"

"This, is our date." He tells me proudly as he set s the crate down on the bed.

"You got us a box?" I ask inquisitively.

"No, I got us a date. Now, you need to go hide in the bathroom until I say you can come out."

"Are you serious?" I ask him.

"Yep. Now get moving and no peeking until I say come out. Got it?"

"Fine, fine. I'm going." I say, putting my hands up in defeat as I headed for the bathroom.

As I wait behind the closed door, I can hear him moving around on the other side and I try to imagine what it is he's doing. Finally, after what feels like forever, he calls out to me.

"Okay, come on out. I'm ready."

I open the door and find that Gale has transformed our little place in a matter of minutes into a romantic setting. There are candles everywhere, illuminating the entire place with soft, dancing light and a blanket spread out on the floor with a plate of food and a bottle of wine. Where on earth did he find a bottle of wine?

"Well don't just stand there, get over here. You're missing our date!" He tells me, smiling and waving me over and patting the ground next to him. I grin and make my way over to him, settling down next to him on the blanket.

"How did you manage to get a bottle of wine? And all these candles?"

"I have my ways." He says mysteriously.

I give him a look and he gives. "Fine, if you must know, the wine was smuggled in by Haymitch, that man could find liquor anywhere in a 50 mile radius. And the candles I borrowed from the supply closet I found in the kitchen."

"You stole candles?" I whisper.

"No. I borrowed candles. They're going back tomorrow."

"It looks lovely. All of it, really." I gush. This is the most romantic dinner I've ever seen.

"Glad you like it. I thought you might." He says as he hands me a cracker and some cheese.

"And cheese? I don't think I've seen cheese the whole time we've been here!"

"Just something Peeta found for us. He's got better access to the food than I do." He explains through a mouthful of food.

After a just one glass of wine, my head feels fuzzy and my inhibitions fade away. I was used to having wine with my dinner back when I lived with my father. Anytime Capitol visitors were around, we always brought out the wine. It only hits me faster this time because I haven't had any in so long. Eventually, I move closer to Gale, leaning my head against his arm as we talk. When I do, he wraps his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him, leaning down and kissing my head.

"I never would've pegged you as a wine drinker you know." I say, my face buried against his chest, eyes closed. The wine making me a little giggly as I enjoy the shower of small kisses on my head.

"Nah, I'm not really. Some moonshine every now and then. At a party or if I couldn't sleep. Wine I never really had the money for."

"Moonshine? Did I ever drink that?"

"Don't think so. You weren't to crazy about me drinking it either."

"Well, what was I crazy about? What did I love?" I wish I knew what all my favorite things about him were during the time I can't seem to remember.

"Uh, me silly." He teases, making a face as if he can't believe I'd ask such a ridiculous question.

I smile up at him. "Obviously. But what else. What things did I love that were just between me and you? What were my favorite things?"

"I don't know. You liked when I would give you flowers. Anytime I did that, you'd take one and pin it in your hair. It was your way of letting me know that you liked it."

"I do like flowers."

"Especially sunflowers. Those you always liked the best. That was what you used at our wedding, you know."

"I did? Hmmm, I'm surprised I had much say in it."

"Madge? You had say in just about all of it. It was pretty amazing how you pulled it all together and made sure it was really perfect for us. And you did it in just a few short days."

"But I thought the Capitol took care of everything? I mean, they always did with everything else. I didn't even get to pick out my own clothes."

"You didn't have any say in who was invited, which ended up being just about all of Panem. Everything else had your touches on it in one way or another. The cake, the flowers, your dress, the music. It was all you."

"My dress? Really? It was so different than what I would've picked." I tell him as I remember the picture of the ruffle covered dress.

"That's because you don't know the secret." He whispers as I feel his fingers brush through my hair.

"What secret? We have a secret?" I ask, intrigued and delighted. The wine still freeing any jitters I feel, allowing me to lean more closely to him as we discuss this secret.

"Yeah, we have one." His voice muffled by my hair as he plants more small kisses on my head.

"Tell it to me?" I ask. Closing my eyes as I feel the bliss of his kisses to my head send tingles down my spine.

"The ruffles. That's our secret." His voice less muffled now as his face pulls away from my hair.

Ruffles? How is that our secret? I don't get it. "I don't understand." I say looking up at him. He leans down and presses light kisses on my face.

"You know that night you found me, asleep in the meadow? The night I woke up with you standing over me?"

"Yeah…"

"Well, that was the start of the ruffle secret. Do you remember what you were wearing?" He asks between kisses to my forehead.

I think back, trying to focus on the memory and not on his kisses. It was the middle of the night. I had on a nightgown. That short ruffled one. "My ruffled nightgown?"

"Mmmhmm. And it drove me absolutely insane. It was all I could do to not grab you and pull you down in the grass with me. God, those ruffles….the way they grazed over your legs…" He whispers as his lips finally find mine and he kisses me. I can feel it in this kiss, the desire he's remembering.

"So big, tough, Gale Hawthorne has a thing for ruffles, huh?" I tease when the kiss breaks.

"Guilty." He confesses, an almost embarrassed smile on his face. "But only on you."

"Well that actually explains a lot. My wedding dress and the blue dress I wore in the pre-games interview. I was doing it for you. Like I was sending you a secret message or something." I say aloud as it all suddenly makes sense in my mind.

"Yep. As soon as you found out I liked you in that nightgown you called up your Capitol shopper and requested she send you more clothing with ruffles. You used to love taunting me with it. You'd show up at school or my house or wherever and you'd have something on with ruffles on it. And a sneaky smile to go with it. You'd have so much fun driving me crazy, reminding me of that night in the meadow. And you made it very, very challenging to keep my hands off of you."

"All because of a nightgown?"

"One very alluring, very tempting ruffled nightgown." He says breathily as he covers my mouth with his again.

Hearing all this, the secret we shared and how I used to tease him with it, makes me want to kiss him even more. That, combined with the effects of the wine, cause me to find myself needing to be closer to him than I am. I shift, lifting myself up slightly and resettling myself on his lap. His arms encircle me, his lips magical against mine. That blissful, floaty feeling consumes me and I press myself against his chest and his lips begin to travel down my jaw, onto my neck. It feels so extraordinary, leaving me wanting more of this, like I suddenly can't get enough of him. I let out a tiny moan, unable to control myself. At first it fuels him, his lips hungrier against my skin but then, out of nowhere, he slows their movement. And then they stop altogether.

"We should slow down." He whispers in my ear. Even the feel of his breath sends a surge of need and want right through me. Slow down? Is he crazy?

"What?" I manage to get out, breathless and dizzy.

"This. We should slow down. I got a little carried away. Sorry, memories, you know?" He explains.

I stare at him confused. "But…it's okay. I like this." I tell him, thinking he must be doing this for my benefit. He must think I'm nervous.

He smiles down at me, runs his thumb over my cheek. "I like it too." Kiss to my lips but only quickly before he speaks again. "But I can't rush through this with you. As much as I'd like too, it isn't fair to you if I do."

"Are you serious? You want us to stop?"

"No. Not at all. But I want to be sure when things move further for us that it isn't clouded with wine."

"You think I want you to kiss my neck like that because I'm drunk?" I ask, not sure if I should be insulted that he thinks I'm drunk or if I should be grateful he respects me enough to stop just in case I am.

"No, not drunk. Just maybe a little tipsy. But it isn't just that. Madge, you have no idea how much I want you. Here. Right now, everyday, all the time. Trust me, I want you. But I have to wait because it only means something if you honestly want it too. It has to come from you, not me."

I stare at him, my eyes watching his and I see so much love in his eyes, on his face. He truly loves me. I can see it right there in his eyes. My heart skips a little as I go to speak. "I can still kiss you though, right? That's still okay?"

"More than okay." He whispers as he leans forward, kissing me, slowly this time. I fall into it, savoring it, taking it in. How did I get so lucky? How did I ever end up with someone so…so everything my heart could have ever wished for?

(Gale POV)

I wrap my arms around her as she curls against my side. Having her sleep like this, wrapped against me, keeps me from falling asleep myself. Because I'm just so completely happy that we're at this point. The last couple days have been incredible. As incredible as when we very first began dating back home in 12. It was like we had that fight about Tripp and my temper and then once that was resolved, she really began to warm up to the idea of us. She warmed up to me. Even now as she falls asleep in my arms, I can't get enough of her. I just love this girl so much. If it's even possible, I think I love her even more now than I did before.

Tonight, we'd had a date night again, something I intend to keep doing. I'd borrowed a bunch of candles from the supply closet in the kitchen. No one will miss them before I return them tomorrow and they're the long-burning kind so I knew I wouldn't use them all up tonight. Then, after sharing with Peeta my plans to continue date nights, he manages to score some soft cheeses and bakes me some crackers. I'd gone to Haymitch hoping he could get me a bottle of champagne and as I suspected, he found a bottle for me in no time. Some sparkling wine he says tastes better than champagne. Girls love it, he'd said. I have no clue where he found it and I definitely don't want to find out what girls he's shared a bottle of wine with so I thank him and get the heck out of his office.

I'd divulged the secret about the ruffles to Madge finally. The moment just felt right to tell her and she responded well to it. More than well actually. She'd climbed into my lap and our kissing grew more intense. She was eagerly welcoming my kisses, pressing herself against me, kissing me back. I'd gotten caught up in the moment, almost forgetting that this was new territory for Madge now. When I heard that light moan, that ever pleasurable sound slip from her mouth, I'd realized I needed to slow us down. I didn't want to stop us but I knew I needed to. Madge is new to all of this, she doesn't remember anything from before and I need her to be certain of every single move she makes. If she were to get caught up in the moment and get carried away and then have regrets later, I'd never forgive myself. So, I'll keep things slow. I want to be absolutely certain that when things progress between us to that next level, that it's felt one hundred percent on both sides. It has to be what we both undoubtedly want.

While she sleeps soundly in my arms, I run my fingers through her blonde, wavy hair and watch her. She's so precious to me and feeling her come back to me, one slow step at a time, makes me begin to feel whole again. I have her. She doesn't love me yet of course but she will. I can feel it. She will love me, I know she will.

The next morning, when I wake up, she's awake already but is still tucked under my arms.

"Morning my love." I say before I realize it's too much. She may know I love her but that doesn't mean she wants to hear me talk about it when she isn't at that point yet. Inwardly, I cringe, hoping she won't pull away from me over my saying that. She doesn't. Instead, her face lights up and she presses her lips against mine. It's enough to let me know that I didn't freak her out.

"Morning. How'd you sleep?" She asks.

"Too good." I mumble as I hug her tighter to me, not ready for us to get out of bed and not wanting to let go of her. She responds by nuzzling her face in the curve of my neck. I feel her lips kiss me there, just once and quickly before she releases herself from my grasp and heads for the bathroom, smiling back at me over her shoulder before closing the door behind her. God, this girl drives me crazy. In the best and worst ways.

Later, at breakfast, she continues to show me that she's growing more comfortable day by day when she takes her food tray and heads straight over to where my family is seated. It's the first time she hasn't wanted to eat alone. I grab my tray, following behind her, smile smeared across my face.

Breakfast goes well with my family. Posy couldn't be happier to have Madge at the table. She's really been missing her and we were all running out of excuses as to why Madge wasn't able to come around much. Rory seems to have forgiven me for the whole Tripp thing. And honestly, the kid is wise beyond his years. Had it not been for him, I don't know that I would've told Madge about everything and that could've ruined everything for us. Yep, he's a smart one, I'll give him that.

I was intrigued when Posy ratted out Rory about a crush he has on some girl in his class.

"Rory's got a girlfriend. He luuuvvvs her!" She giggles. Rory, not nearly as amused as everyone else at the table, gives Posy's chair a firm kick under the table.

"I do not! Shut up, Posy!" He says, face frowning.

"It's true! He talks about her all the time." Vick chimes in, winning himself a chair kick as well.

"All right, all right. Leave him alone you two. If he doesn't want us to talk about his love life, we need to respect that." I teasingly scold, while taking my own jab at Rory.

To that, he shoves back from the table, storming off. I realize I probably took it too far and I feel bad since I kinda owe him. "Be right back. Gotta do some damage control." I whisper to Madge.

"Hey man, wait up!"

"Leave me alone, alright? I don't have a girlfriend."

"But you do like someone, don't you? That part's true?"

"Kind of."

"Well that's nothing to be embarrassed about. What's her name?"

"Her name's Rebekah. She's in my class."

"Well have you talked to her yet?"

"No. Wouldn't know what to say. It's different here. Back home, it wouldn't have been a big deal. I was the little brother of a legend. Here, I'm nobody."

I laugh a little. "So that means, here, you get to be the actual legend, not just the little brother of legend. What are you waiting for? Go find her and give her some of that Hawthorne charm we're famous for."

He straightens up a bit, looking more confident now and smiles. "Never thought of it like that."

I gesture for him to get going, to go find her and he does. He heads out of the cafeteria, legs moving much faster than before. I turn back to the table to see Madge, holding Posy on her lap, talking with her in an animated fashion. I stand back, just watching them together. I love seeing this. Seeing her fall back into place with my family. My eyes meet with my mothers and she smiles across the room at me. She too, is glad to see Madge coming around. Life is finally good again. We're finally happy. All of us, together and happy.

**_A/N: Thank you everyone for your reviews! This was just a happy, fluffy chapter because well, because don't Madge and Gale deserve that at this point? I think so. _**

**_And Bekylou4jc, I hope you enjoyed the little surprise I threw in just for you!_**


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

(Madge POV)

I finally got my stitches out and now I have a nice scar to show for it. It sort of matches the one across my face. There aren't many things that I miss about the Capitol but I must admit that right about now I sure wouldn't mind having these scars taken care of. The Capitol, being vain as they are, would have polished these scars right off my body without even asking. They would have made sure I never even saw them. But, they of course have all the latest and greatest technology whereas 13, does not. Not for to use for vanity's sake anyway. So, the scars will stay. It isn't as if I'm worried about being ugly. That isn't the case at all. I just want my old face back. The one that doesn't hold proof of things I can't remember.

I'd hoped to have my memory back by now but so far that isn't the case. I've got nothing. Big, fat nothing. And I'm bordering on throwing a pity party for myself. But that's just how I feel today. Ask me about it tomorrow and I may not care one bit if it ever comes back because I'm just that happy. That's probably the most annoying thing about my head injury. The mood swings. Well, more like frequent mood shifts. Elated one day, pity party the next. My doctor says that it's completely normal and to be expected. He tells me that as long as on average, my good days outweigh the bad, that I'm in good shape and progressing nicely. And they do. I find myself happier more often than not.

I'm warming up to the Hawthorne family and slowly starting to spend more time with them. Hazelle and Rory are fully aware of my memory situation but Vick and Posy don't really know about it. Vick, I think, can tell something is different about me but doesn't ask any questions for specifics. Posy on the other hand just thinks I'm me. That little girl is hands down my favorite person here outside of Gale. She's spunky and full of energy and life. I love how she'll just climb right up in my lap whenever she wants and make herself right at home. It makes me feel like part of the family.

Family. I miss mine. My parents and Mabel. All of them, gone. Ripped both from my memories and my life. I find that my memory gap serves to make me feel unsettled about them and what I've been told happened during the time that I cannot remember. I have moments of jealousy that most everyone here was able to bring their families while mine was not so fortunate. Peeta's either. I feel worse for him though. He has no one, whereas at least I have the family I married into. Apparently, no one in his family was able to join him here. They have no idea where he is or what happened to him after the arena was disrupted. They were deemed unfit for rescue and transfer here to 13, based on his mother's nature. My family just couldn't be here because of being in prison and a facility. Peeta has Katniss though and they've become extremely close. I see them together everywhere. Still, I can imagine just how badly his heart must be missing his family. Because I certainly am missing mine.

The other thing that I miss is sunshine. Oh what I wouldn't give for just a few hours of sunshine. They have a specially created lights system here that works like the sun and the lights get brighter during the day, dimmer at night, mimicking the light cycle of an actual day. They do a phenomenal job of making 13 feel like it gets real daylight but it isn't the brightness I miss. It's the feel of the warmth on my skin. And nighttime stars. I'd love to be able to see stars again.

There are only a handful of people ever allowed out of here and above the ground. All of them being part of the defense department. When Gale found out that Katniss got to leave for a few hours one day on some classified mission she wasn't at liberty to discuss, he was green with envy. He misses being above ground too. Occasionally, as we lay in bed at night talking, he'll tell me stories of his hunting time in the woods outside of 12 and when he does that you can hear it there in his voice just how very much he longs to return to it.

In a few weeks, I'll be given the assigned a work position here in 13, having completed my time at the Medical Center as a patient. Ren tells me that even if my memory doesn't return that I'll still be released from care based on my ability to function independently. Because I never actually held a job before, I'm curious as to what they'll have me do. I won't be in the cafeteria or kitchen or laundry center because I know next to nothing about that kind of stuff. Ren said they'll give me something like an assessment exam that will help them determine where I would be of most use. I have mixed feelings about working though. Part of me welcomes the challenge of learning a skill and part of me is terrified. What if I'm not good at anything? What if they can't find anything to do with me? I mean, my whole life, at least the memorable part, I was cared for round the clock. I didn't cook or clean or craft anything. My only responsibility was to be an image of complete submission and support for the Capitol. That I could do. I could pretend all day long around Capitol people but what good does that do me here? None. Ren can tell that I'm worried about the work thing. He keeps reassuring me that it's no big deal, nothing to fret about. I hope he's right. I hope I don't turn out to be a total failure.

"Got you something." Gale's voice says from above me as I feel his lips press quickly against the top of my head. I'd been so lost in thought that I hadn't heard him come in just now.

"Hey! Sorry, didn't hear you come in." I greet and apologize at the same time. He smiles and tauntingly holds up a small little box in front of me. "What is that?"

"This, is one vanilla bean cupcake with chocolate buttercream frosting. Made especially for the one I love!" He announces as he lightly shakes the box in front of me.

I smile. He's taken to doing that. Telling me that he loves me, working it into small conversation like he just did now. He's careful not to over do it, not wanting to push me away or anything but he definitely still does it. And although I'm still not ready to say those words to him yet, I find myself wanting to hear them from him all the same. "You had me at cupcake. Hand it over!" I say holding my hand out for the box.

He does. As he leans forward and places the box in my hand he also takes a second to kiss me again, this time a light peck of my lips. As I open the box and pull out the dessert, he lays back on the bed, resting his hands behind his head.

"Peeta make this?" I ask through a mouthful of cake.

"Yep. One for you and one each for Katniss and Prim."

"I think he just may be my favorite person right now." I say as I continue to devour the sweet cake. Peeta's been doing this a lot lately, sneaking and baking small treats that I, along with Katniss and Prim, reap the benefits of.

"My feelings are so hurt!" Gale teases, placing his hand against his chest in mock astonishment.

"Hush. You know what I mean." I say as I move towards him, leaning over so he can have a bite. He lets me feed him the last bite, leaving a small whip of chocolate frosting on the corner of his mouth. I take my finger and wipe it away. When I do, he moves his arms out from behind his head and wraps them around my waist, capturing me and pulling me down closer to him. I don't resist. I love when he's like this, all playful and flirtatious with me. He's very good at it.

"What were you thinking about when I came in?" He asks as snuggles me close against him.

"Nothing in particular. Just thinking about progress I've made sine we got here."

"Yeah? Well, you're doing great you know."

"I guess so. Mostly, I just wish I'd get my memories back."

"Head injuries take time to heal."

"Head injuries suck." I mumble.

He laughs. "Agreed. But overall, I'd say you're doing the very best anyone can ask of you."

"I wonder if when I regain my memory I'll also regain control over my moods. Right before you came in, I was bordering on throwing myself a pity party. Which you ruined by the way with that whole cupcake thing."

"What? They don't serve cake at pity parties?" He teases.

"No, I'm pretty sure they don't." I smile back at him. I'm helpless against his charm sometimes. I couldn't be pitiful right now even if I wanted too. He's just too darn cute. I inch my face closer to his and intending to steal a quick kiss. Instead, he keeps the kiss long, pressing his lips against mine. Butterflies flutter in the pit of my stomach. I can never get enough of kissing him. Ever.

"Still feel like having that pity party?" He whispers, his forehead against mine.

Unable to speak and only wanting to kiss him more, I shake my head and lean back into his lips. I can feel him smile beneath the kiss, happy. Ever since our date with the wine, I've wanted to kiss him more. A lot more. And he's happy to kiss me any old time but he's always guarded. Always holding back. He may have thought it was the wine that had me wanting things to go further that night but it really wasn't. True, the wine had undone any inhibitions which may have tempted me to be shy but I felt what I felt. And what I felt was a need for him to keep kissing my neck. He hasn't let it go that far since then though. Always pulling away from me as things get heated.

"You sure are good at this." I whisper between kisses.

"At kissing?"

"Mmhmm." I murmur against his mouth.

"At kissing you." He corrects me, his lips leaving mine only long enough for him to speak.

I trail my lips away from his mouth, moving across his cheek and towards his ear. He isn't stopping me, so I continue. Perhaps he's lifting those boundaries after all. My kisses find his ear and then move down to just below it, onto his neck. Gale's hands are tangled in my hair and I can hear him breathing heavily. He likes this I think to myself as I move my hands over the muscles of his chest. Even through his gray shirt, I can feel how toned his muscles are. I move further down his neck, my lips dancing along the neckline of his shirt. And then he does it. He pulls back.

"Madge…" He says softly. And I can hear it there in his tone that we're finished. That this isn't going to continue.

"You are so frustrating!" I fuss as I bury my face in the pillow. I hate when he does this. When everything is feeling so good and that blissful, floaty sensation is taking over me. When all I want is to keep kissing him, keep exploring his body.

(Gale POV)

Her lips are soft as satin as they move against mine. God I love kissing her like this. I love it. I love her. Which is why when I feel her move her lips to my ear, kissing down onto my neck, I don't stop her. I close my eyes and savor it, take it in, wanting more. My hands go up and tangle in her blonde wavy hair and then I feel her own hands running over my chest. It's all I can do to stop as her lips tease around the neck of my shirt. Takes everything I've got to push back from her, to stop her there. I whisper her name, my breathing making it difficult to speak words. This had gotten so good, so quickly. She knew what I meant though. She knew I was stopping us. I can't believe it but I am. Don't want to but I am. I have too. I don't want it to go any further right now. Not now. Not until she loves me back.

"You are so frustrating!" Her muffled voice cries out from her pillow. And don't I know it. I'm just as frustrated with myself as she is. But that doesn't mean this is the right time.

"C'mon, don't be mad." I tell her, running my fingers through her hair.

She pulls her face from the pillow and gives me a mean, pouty face. "You are no fun whatsoever Gale Hawthorne."

"And you are one pouty girl Madge Hawthorne." I tease back.

"Well stop giving me reasons to pout and maybe I can resolve that about myself." She says as she sits up, folding her arms over her chest.

"All in good time my love, all in good time."

"Bet you didn't make us wait this long the first time around." She mumbles under her breath but I still catch what she's just said.

"Oh yeah? Well, that would be a losing bet for you to make." I tell her very matter of factly as all those nights in the woods flood back into my mind. All those times I forced us to stop.

She looks at me, head slightly cocked to the side before she responds to what I've just said. "Really?"

"Well don't go sounding so surprised about it. You make me feel so cheap." I continue to tease her, pretending to be horribly insulted.

"No, seriously? You made us wait a long time?"

"And you hated me for it back then too."

"How is that possible? I mean, why did you wait? I hadn't lost my memory back then, I was fully aware of what I was doing."

"You may not have had a head injury but it was still a huge thing. I didn't want you to do something in the moment, in the heat of things, and then regret it later or resent me for it."

"Were you like that with all your girlfriends?"

"Not exactly. But you were different than just any old girlfriend. You were more to me and I wanted to be certain it stayed that way."

"You knew you wanted to marry me all the way back then, in the beginning?"

"Not right away or anything but I knew there was something about you that was different. I knew what we had was on a whole different level than anything I'd ever experienced before. Before too long, I knew it was hopeless, I had to be with you forever."

"Huh. I guess I just figured waiting wouldn't have been a consideration. So how long did we wait?"

"Well, it felt like forever, I'll tell you that much. But in reality, we only waited weeks. Felt like years though."

"And was it perfect? Was it worth all the waiting?" She asks me as her cheeks blush pink.

"Perfect. Me and you, alone in your room all night while your father was out of town. Thunderstorm outside. Sleeping with you in my arms all night long afterwards. Couldn't have been more perfect. It was the first night we ever said I love you to each other."

Her face gets all soft and glowy as she imagines it. She doesn't remember it so imagining is all she can do. Thinking this sends a sharp pang to my heart. A sadness for her that it is possible she'll never get the memory of those moments back. And she deserves to have that.

"Sure sounds like it was perfect."

"It was. And it will be again, I promise. You just have to trust me on this." I tell her as I stroke the side of her face with my fingers. My heart flutters as she leans her face against my hand, closing her eyes. She may not love me just yet, but she's getting much closer.

"I trust you."

"Good. Wanna go for a walk before bed?"

"Sure." She says as she opens her eyes.

After our quick stroll, which has become something of an evening habit for us, we go to bed, her curled up in my arms, face pressed against my chest. The nights never last long enough, morning always comes too soon. And then I have to get up and share her with the rest of the world. Well, not the whole world. Just anybody we see in 13. And selfishly, I wish it could always be just me and her. Having her warm up to me like this is sometimes so wonderful that I start to think back to how it felt to have her not know me and not want anything to do with me. I hope I never have to feel that again. I never want to feel that kind of heartbreak ever again. I don't think I could bear it.

We're just about to the cafeteria when we run into Katniss.

"Hey, there you guys are, I was just looking for you. Listen, I need to steal Gale away for a little while. We need his opinion down in the Defense Department."

My opinion? That's new. "On what?"

"Can't really talk about it right now but Haymitch sent me to find you. I just got your work assignment switched for the day with your supervisor. Today, you're helping on a special assignment."

"Right now?" I ask. Surely I don't have to go right now. Madge and I haven't even eaten breakfast yet.

"Fraid so. Sorry Madge, he'll catch up to you later today, okay?" Katniss insists, apologizing to Madge while handing me my temporary pass for the Defense Department.

"Go ahead. And have a good day." Madge encourages me as she reaches up on her tip toes to kiss me goodbye.

"You'll be alright having breakfast alone?" I ask her.

"Of course. Besides, I won't be alone, I'll go sit with your family. Now get going already. Do something exciting for once instead of just washing dishes."

I glance over at Katniss who is impatiently tapping her foot, waiting for me to hurry up and say my goodbye. "Okay. I'll come find you in a little while." I tell Madge as I kiss her one more time.

"So what's this all about?" I ask once we're seated in Haymitch's office.

"Well kid, we have an upcoming rescue mission that we need to pick your brain for. Katniss here tells us you know the woods around 12 just as well as she does, if not better. That true?"

"A rescue mission in 12? For who?"

"The woods? You know em or not kid?" He asks again, ignoring my inquiry as to who needs rescue. Guess he probably can't tell me.

"Yeah, I know them like the back of my hand. What do you need to know?"

"And you could lead a group quickly through them in the dark?"

"Depends on the size and ability of the group, but yeah, I think so."

"Think or know kid?"

"If they can keep up with me, then yeah, I can lead a group in the dark." I look over at Katniss and she gives me a nervous look but I can't really tell why.

Haymitch shuffles some papers on his desk and then looks back up at me. "Okay then. Let's go over the game plan." And he plops down a stack of papers in front of me.

A mission? I'm going to be helping with a rescue mission? I thought they just needed my advice on something, not actually use me as a part of the mission. My mind is reeling as I flip through the pages, scanning all the information. This is way more than I anticipated they would ask of me. Way, way more.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

(Gale POV)

All I can think is what will Madge think about this? How does she feel about me leaving and going on a very dangerous, very risky rescue mission? I just spent the better part of the morning in Haymitch's office going over all the mission plans. It's huge. Way bigger than I think it should be but apparently, according to people they have working on the inside, this is our one shot and it's completely necessary. Once I read over all the information, I knew I had to do it. I had to help however I could. But I also knew there was no way I would do it without talking it over with Madge first. Just me and Madge. No Haymitch or anyone else around to put any pressure on her. I want to know how she really feels about me being a part of this. And if she isn't comfortable with it, I'm not going to do it.

I don't even know how to begin speaking to her about it. I had to practically beg Haymitch to let me talk to Madge first. He'd expected me to agree to help right away. And in all honesty, I think I would have been quick to join them had Madge not been in the picture. If she wasn't a factor, I'd never have to even think about it. But, she's my everything and I refuse to do this without her approval. Finally, he'd agreed to give me two hours to get back to him. Apparently, our window of opportunity is extremely narrow. And it's later tonight. Right now, I'm on my way to find Madge. I have no idea what her schedule is like today so I'm gonna check home first. Hopefully she's there. I really don't want to have to discuss this in a public place. I punch in the key code and enter. There she is, asleep on the bed. She looks so completely peaceful that I can't stand knowing I'll have to wake her up. I sit down on the bed next to where she's laying and gently shake her shoulder.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" She asks groggily as she yawns and rubs her eyes waking up.

"Had to come find you and get your thoughts on something. Sorry I had to wake you up. You not feeling good or are you just bored?"

"Oh I'm fine. Mild headache earlier but it seems to be gone now. They aren't nearly as bad as they were before. What's up? What do you need to talk about?" She tells me as she sits upright, scooting herself closer to me.

"Well, you know how I had to go to the Defense Department today? They wanted to talk to me about a rescue mission. One for District 12. And they want me to be a part of it."

"Rescue for 12? For who? And how big a part are we talking here?" She spouts out questions rapidly, fully awake and alert now.

"It's a rescue to get out as many citizens of 12 as we can manage. And it's kind of a big part for me if I do it. I'd be leading groups through the woods to the pickup points and going back for more if possible."

Her mouth hangs open and for a moment, she's silently stunned. "As much of 12 as possible? What?"

"Yeah. 13 has people in the Capitol who are undercover and send messages and warnings back here. Well, apparently, Snow is furious over still not having located the escaped tributes and their families. He's declared vengeance on 12 as we had the most escapees. He's gonna demolish it. All of it."

"When? When is he doing this?" She asks, her eyes wide and full of horror as she pictures the place she grew up being destroyed.

"Tomorrow morning. So the rescue has to happen tonight. They want to get as many people out as possible. If I help, I leave in a couple hours."

"And if you don't help?"

"Then I don't help. I will only do it if you're one hundred percent okay with it. I would never go otherwise."

"No, I mean, if you don't go, then who helps in your place?"

"Someone from the Defense Staff here in 13. They want me and Katniss because we know the woods so well that traveling through them swiftly in the dead of night will be easier for us. They think it'll help rescue more people."

"Katniss is doing it?"

"Yeah. Haymitch will be part of it too but he stays in the hovercrafts. And there's of course a few people from 13 on the rescue team."

"What about Peeta?"

"Nah, not Peeta. He's not familiar with the woods and he's not part of the Defense Department. His skills and talents aren't really needed by the Defense Department. I think that's why they put him in the kitchen to work originally anyway."

Madge is quiet. Fidgeting with the hem of her shirt. I don't say anything, just let her think. I know the last thing she expected was to have me come in here and drop all this on her. Heck, it was the last thing I'd expected to happen today. When she finally looks up at me, her eyes are teary.

"You have to do it. This whole thing, it's all my fault. All of it. Had my mother never signed that deal, had I never gone into the arena, had I never needed rescue from the games, none of this would be happening. 12 wouldn't be in danger at all. Not like this anyway. You have to go Gale. I don't want you too, but you just have too. I can't let everyone die just because of me. Please, you have to help them. For me." She pleads, tears flowing from her eyes.

"No, no. Don't blame all this on you. Remember who's really responsible for all this. It's Snow. It's the Capitol. Not you. It's never your fault, okay?"

"But it is." She insists through her tears, shaking her head and then continuing. "Will you do it? Will you go?"

"I'll go but only if you're really sure about it."

She leans forward, pressing her lips against mine with fierceness and emotion. I grip her shoulders, kissing back. When we pull back, her tearstained face is enough to break your heart. Fear, sadness, guilt. It all registers there.

"I'll be back tomorrow morning. I'll find you as soon as I get back. I promise. You…You'll be alright here tonight by yourself?"

"Don't worry about me. I'll be just fine. Maybe I'll go kidnap Posey for a sleepover or something. You just go do what you have to and get back here to me. Safely." She says, futilely wiping the tears from her eyes and trying to put on a brave face.

"I will. I promise. And Madge, I love you." I whisper, then kiss her softly once more before I have to leave. I don't usually tell her I love her. Not in straight out words like that but I needed to say it right now and it's okay that she isn't able to say it back to me yet. When I say it, her tears only flow more profusely and she nods, kisses me back and then gestures for me to go.

Outside our door, I have to stop and lean against the wall for a moment to collect myself. I take a few deep breaths and close my eyes. It's so hard to leave her here. Every part of me is screaming at me to just stay. To stay here with her where I know we're together and safe. But I know that I can't do that. I have to do this.

Back in the Haymitch's office everything becomes a whirlwind as soon as I say yes. They take me and Katniss to be fitted for special nighttime gear. Black clothing so we'll blend into the night. It has a temperature feature which is meant to help maintain our body heat as we'll be outside in the cold of night for hours. Glasses that have night vision. Boots.

"Is there anyway I can get my old boots? These are fine and all but I think I'd be more comfortable in my own." I ask once I try on the issued boots. They're stiff, not broken in like mine and I know they'll slow me down.

"I'll approve that, if you really think it'll help you." The man issuing our equipment and clothing says. He scribbles something on a notepad and hands it to another worker who then disappears through a door. When she returns, she's holding my boots in hand. They'd taken them from me when we first got to 13 and issued me the standard uniform stuff. Having them back, feeling them on my feet, gives me confidence that I can do this. Makes me feel more like Gale Hawthorne of 12. It feels good.

After clothing, we're given weapons and quick lesson on how to use them. Small, handheld guns. I've never held one before and it feels strange having one in my grip. It's lighter than I would've imagined and unnerving. I've hunted for years. Killed animals for food. I'm not unfamiliar with using weapons. Yet, somehow, knowing this gun is meant to be used on humans, it leaves me with a sick feeling in my stomach. I don't want to have to use this. Hopefully, I won't have too.

We're given a quick meal and then sent to load up on the hovercrafts. There's a total of four crafts going. One runner for each craft. That's what Katniss and I are. Runners. When the crafts land out in the woods, we'll disembark and make our way to the fence where we should find people waiting for us. Undercover Peacekeepers in 12 are supposedly responsible for collecting people and bringing them to one of two sections of fence that has power temporarily turned off. One section in town and one in the Seam. I'm working the town section because I'm more familiar with the woods there than Katniss is. Madge and I spent a lot of time in the woods behind her house whereas Katniss kept more towards the Seam side of the woods.

There will be two other runners who have never actually been in the woods outside of 12 but have studied extensively over landscape maps. Apparently, 13 has a couple people like this for every district. People who's job it is to know the ins and outs of every district even though they've never actually been there. It's supposed to help strengthen the rescue teams should a rescue ever be needed. Like tonight for example.

There's a pilot for each craft, a communicator and a medic. The pilot of course flies and navigates the hovercraft. The communicator sends and translates messages back and forth with a command center in 13. The medic is for just in case something happens. Just in case something goes a little bit off plan. Each hovercraft can hold up to 50 passengers. We'll have to make multiple runs, complicating our mission, making each run slightly more dangerous than the previous one. And the runners are personally in extra danger because once each group is loaded onto a hovercraft, it takes off heading out to drop them off in 13 before coming back to pick up the next load of people. During that time when the hovercraft is gone, us runners will be making the trek back through the woods towards the fences of 12 to collect another group of people. Meaning that during that time, we're out there completely alone. No way to communicate. No way to call for help or to escape. If something goes wrong, 13 won't be there to help us. That'll be our most vulnerable time during the mission.

We're instructed that if anything happens and we're captured that we are not, under any circumstances to divuldge the whereabouts or secrets of the existence of 13. As they told us all that, all I could picture was being stuck in some Capitol prison and being tortured as they tried to pry information from us. I shuddered and tried desperately to shake off the image that was now trapped in my mind.

The mission is to rescue as many as we possibly can but in truth we won't be able to save everyone. Not by a long shot. We've already been told that time will only allow us a maximum of 4 runs. And that's a best case scenario. And we've been forewarned that not everyone will be willing to come and not everyone is welcome to come. The undercover peacekeepers will have predetermined who will be eligible. If anyone is deemed to be too much of a Capitol Supporter, they aren't welcome and therefore won't be gathered and brought to the fences. 13 is very big on keeping itself safe from the hands of Snow and they're cautious with who they rescue because of this.

Once I board my craft and feel the engines roaring beneath my feet, I have a surge of adrenalin. An urge to get out there, get this done. A feeling like I can do this. My hands and feet are jittery as we take off. Nervous energy. Anxiousness. Anger even. Towards the Capitol of course. How dare they plan to do away with an entire district of people? As if they don't matter? As if they don't love, hope and hurt and feel just like anyone else? As if they were nothing of value? How dare they.

(Madge POV)

I sit crossed legged on our bed until my tears dry up. He's gone. Not forever of course but there's something about just knowing that he's away from here that leaves me feeling so empty. So hollow and alone. Like the best part of me is missing. It's a new and unwanted feeling. One I dislike very much and hope I never have to feel again.

He'd let the decision be mine. Said he wouldn't go unless I was comfortable with it. I didn't want him to go at all but at the very same time all I wanted was for him to go. I didn't even know it was possible to have two such opposing desires at the exact same time. How I could selfishly want him here with me but also plead for him to go and save as many people as he could?

I am so ready for him to just be back. Hasn't even been gone two hours yet but the second that door closed behind him, every part of me ached for him. His words tugged at my heart and I'd found myself almost returning them, almost speaking them back. I love you. He'd said it, knowing full well I wouldn't say it back. Knowing I'm not quite there yet. But now I wonder if I am? Is that what this feeling is? Have I fallen in love with him?

_**A/N: Okay, sorry this chapter was shorter than usual, it just sort of worked out that way.I'd intended to make it longer, especially from Madge's POV, but liked it better with just a small glimpse into the emotions she's feeling about Gale's departure. Chapters should return to normal length with the next posting. Thanks again to all of you who follow, read and review this story! **_


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

(Madge POV)

After I've dried my eyes and washed my face so that my crying won't be so evident, I head over to the Hawthorne's so I can steal Posy for awhile. She'll be able to keep me busy and keep my mind from worrying. Thank heavens for Posy and her overly excited ways. On my way over I realize I didn't ask Gale if his family was aware of him working on this rescue mission and I don't want to bring it to their attention if he didn't want them to worry. I decide that if they ask, I'll just say that Gale's working on a project with Katniss. It's enough of the truth that I won't be lying to them but vague enough that I might be able to avoid spilling any secrets.

As soon as the Hawthorne door is opened following my quiet knock, I'm nearly tackled to the ground by Posy herself.

"Madge!" The tiny girl cries out in delight as she throws herself at me. I laugh and bend down, helping her climb into my arms. I don't think I'll ever tire of having her greet me like this. I'll surely miss it when she's older and no longer thinks I hung the moon.

"Hey there Posy! You are just the person I was looking for!"

"I am? You came just to see me?" Her little eyes wide with happiness.

"Mmhmm. I wanted to see if you wanted to spend the night tonight but first we have to ask your mother if it's okay."

She shimmies down from my arms, taking my hand and tugging me to follow her inside. "Ma! Madge wants me to spend the night with her! Can I go?" She calls out to the back of their apartment where I assume Hazelle must be.

Hazelle soon appears in the front room and smiles when she sees me. "Madge, what a pleasant surprise. We were just heading out for dinner if you care to join us."

"Thank you, I will. I also wanted to see if you would mind letting Posy spend the night with me tonight?"

"She has school in the morning so I'm afraid that might not be the best idea." Hazelle explains and I suddenly remember that here, Posy is a student and can't just come spend the night any old time.

"But Ma! I wanna go!" Posy whines from below Hazelle, tugging at her shirt.

"Posy, what did we discuss about whining when you don't get your way?" Hazelle scolds and I can hear in her voice that she's exhausted with having to deal with Posy's fits.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have mentioned it to her before speaking to you first." I apologize, feeling guilty for having gone about this in a way that lead to Posy having a fit.

"Oh don't worry about it. It's alright. Posy just seems to think that whining is the solution to all life's problems. We've been working on learning to be more grown up, haven't we Posy?"

"Yes mam." Posy says sounding glum as ever and looking down at her feet.

"Now that's much better. How about we compromise on this? Madge can have dinner with us and then you can go home with her for an hour but then you have to come home and go to bed. Do we have a deal?"

The little girl nods, seemingly happy again and grabs my hand, swinging it back and forth. Hazelle looks to me and smiles again. "I'm just afraid if she spends the night she won't sleep a wink and she'll be more than her usual handful of herself for her teachers at school tomorrow. I hope you understand."

"Oh of course I do. Again, I'm sorry I suggested it to her without asking your permission." I apologize again. I feel so foolish for making such a mistake.

"Don't be silly, Madge. You're family. You don't need my permission to invite any of us over." She says softly, pressing her hand over my shoulder for a moment as she speaks. There's a warmth and sincerity when she says these words to me and my heart feels it. Family. She thinks of me as family. I reckon I knew this back before I lost my memories but hearing it now, it sounds sweet and inviting. Like I'm included in something special.

I nod and smile. "So where are Rory and Vick?" I ask as we head out to the cafeteria, Posy still holding tightly to my hand as we walk.

"They went to go meet Rebekah, Rory's girlfriend. They'll be at dinner."

"So they're officially a couple then? Rory and Rebekah?" I ask. I hadn't heard of this yet but I also hadn't asked.

"Yes, it's official so to speak. Rory finally got enough courage to talk to her and as it turns out she'd had her eye on him as well but had been too shy to approach him. They've been practically inseparable ever since then."

"That's good to hear. I'm glad he's happy."

"I'm happy for him too though I'm not sure I was ready for him to grow up and start dating." She says with a sigh before looking down at where Posy walks between us. "Posy, promise me you won't go dating and falling in love until you're at least 30, okay?"

"Okay." The little girl agrees easily, not realizing Hazelle was teasing.

"Is Gale at work?"

"Sort of, yes. He's working on a special project with Katniss tonight."

"Well, I'm sure he'll enjoy that more than washing dishes."

I nod, unable to answer, afraid I'll give away what he's really doing right now. Once we arrive in the cafeteria and get our food trays, we join Rory, Rebekah and Vick at the family's usual table.

"Madge, this is Rebekah. Rebekah, this Madge, my sister in law." Rory introduces us.

"It's very nice to meet you Rebekah." I say, smiling at her. She's pretty. Dark hair like the Hawthornes but with blue eyes instead of grey. She stares at me for a moment and smiles at me then looks quickly down at her food, pushing it around her plate. It seems odd, as if I've made her uncomfortable though I'm not sure why. Maybe she's just really shy. Hazelle had mentioned that, hadn't she? I push the thought from my mind and let myself enjoy the table conversations around me as we eat.

After dinner, Posy comes back to my place with me, coloring book and crayons in tow. She tells me how she got them at her new school. That every child in class gets them. She shows me pictures that she's colored and points out how she's getting better at staying inside the lines. We color a picture of a horse together and she insists that we tear it out and hang it on my wall. I sign my name on the bottom of it and hand the purple crayon to her so she can do the same and she just gives me a look before tossing the crayon to the floor.

"What's the matter? Don't you want to put your name on it?" I ask as I squat down next to her.

"I don't know how to write my name." She pouts.

I laugh a little. "Is that all? Well don't worry, I can teach you how to do that. It's easy!"

Her little face looks at me, skeptical that I can teach her. I nod and pick the crayon up from the floor. She timidly watches as I take a blank page of paper and carefully print out P-O-S-Y at the top of the page. I hand her the crayon and guide her hand as it draws out each letter.

"See, you can do it. All you need is a little practice." I encourage her. "Why don't you try it without my help this time?"

I watch as she struggles to copy the shapes of the letters but she manages. Her print is anything but steady or neat but it is legible and she repeats it twice more on her own, each time getting better at it.

"I did it! I did it!" She cries out with pride.

"Now, how about you put your name on that picture of ours?" I say tilting my head towards the horse picture on the wall. She's just finished it when there's a knock on the door.

"Hey, I'm here for Posy." Rory tells me when I open the door.

"Look what Madge taught me! My name! It's my name!" She squeals as Rory enters the small room.

"Wow, good job Pose." He says looking down at the page where she's been practicing her name. "Hey, listen, I wanted to explain about earlier at dinner. About Rebekah." He says quietly to me now.

"Explain what?"

"Why she stared and got all quiet when you sat down. I know you noticed."

"Oh, I just figured she was shy is all. Was it something more than that?"

"She is shy but that wasn't it. I forgot to warn her before you sat down with us about your scars. I'd told her about you before and how you'd been in the games and how that landed us here in 13. But I didn't mention the scars because, well, I just don't think about em. To me you're just Madge. I don't even notice the scars anymore. Anyway, Rebekah was just surprised is all. She didn't know that you'd been hurt in the games and she was just a little shocked is all. I'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable."

"I wasn't uncomfortable. And I can't say the scars don't make me take a second look myself sometimes. They are pretty frightening to look at."

"She didn't mean to be rude. It just caught her off guard, ya know? She's really nice and I like her a whole bunch. I…I hope you'll be willing to meet her again sometime." He says with a bit of question in his voice. As if he's afraid I've already written her off.

"Don't be ridiculous. If she's important to you, and I think that she is, I'd love to meet her again. I wasn't offended at all, I promise."

He grins in relief. "Thanks Madge! Hey, where's Gale? Shouldn't he be home by now?"

"He, um, went to work on a special project with Katniss tonight. He'll be back later."

His face goes still and for a moment, I think he must see through my vagueness. Must see that I'm not being completely honest. But he doesn't say anything. He just turns our attention to Posy who has been busy still practicing her name.

"Posy Hawthorne! What did you just do?" He exclaims making her jump a little.

"I ran out of paper!" She whines and I realize that on my concrete floor, in purple crayon, is a scribbly written P-O-S-Y. She wrote on our floor.

"Doesn't matter! You know you can't do that!" Rory scolds her.

I reach over and put my hand on his arm to stop him. She was so excited to have learned how to write her name that I don't want her writing on my floor to take away from that. "It's okay. Don't worry about it."

Rory just looks at me and shakes his head. "Same Madge you always were, spoiling her rotten whenever you can." There's a hint of smile behind his words and I can see that he means this to be a compliment.

I squat down to Posy. "You shouldn't color on people's floors but I'm not mad. It's okay just this once." I tell her and she loses the whiney face and her proud smile returns.

Rory and Posy head on home and I'm once again left alone with my thoughts. I wonder where Gale is right now? What part of the mission he's working on? Is he safe? Is he scared or does he feel confident? So many questions are flooding through my mind and I'd had so little time to discuss details with Gale before he had to leave. Perhaps it's better that way though. Better if I don't know what exactly he's doing right now. I slide down to the floor and trace my fingers over the crayon markings Posy left behind. It's going to be a very long, sleepless night.

A knock at the door brings me to my feet in a flash. Is something wrong? Have they come to tell me that the mission failed and something happened to Gale? I swing the door open and very much to my surprise, find none other than Rory Hawthorne standing there.

"What are you doing here?"

"You didn't really think I'd let you sit here all night by yourself while Gale's out on that rescue mission did you?"

"How did you know?"

"You gave it away when you said he was working with Katniss. Prim told me this morning about the top secret mission."

And with that, the brave front I'd been trying to uphold crumbles and the floodgates of tears opens. Just knowing he knows what's going on makes it impossible to hold all this inside myself. If he's at all uncomfortable with my show of emotion, you'd never know it. He just wraps his arms around me and hugs me, letting me cry into his shoulder.

(Gale POV)

When the hovercraft lands and the doors open, I'm down the steps and my feet hit the ground running. The faster I move through here, the faster, I can get back. I figure it'll be twice as hard to lead a group through the woods as it is to travel them alone so I'm hoping to make up some time by moving faster. The other runner, Wyck, assigned to gather groups from town is following right behind me, keeping a decent pace.

As I run, the smell of the outdoors hits my senses harder than I remember. The smell of soil and leaves and the chill of the night air. It's been so long since I experienced any of this. It feels so, so good to be out from underground. To be up, above the earth, it's more revitalizing than I'd expected it would be. And my memory of the woods isn't failing me either. I'd know my way through these woods anywhere, anyday, anytime.

I reach the treeline of the woods without problems. I pause here, waiting for Wyck to catch up. Once he does, I point out the part of the fence in the distance where I see people gathering. It's just next to the meadow and just before the Mayor's house. Geez, did they have to do this next to the his house? They couldn't pick a different spot to have a rescue? But then I realize that all the lights are off in the Mayor's house and he must be out of town. I wonder if because he's important, if he and his family will get to be moved to another district and escape before the district is destroyed?

Wyck gives the bird call signal to the peacekeeper near the fence, who in return sends it back letting us know that it's safe to come for the first group. In the moonlight, we dart across the field and at the fence, I see the first group. It's smaller than I thought it would be. Maybe 10, 15 at best.

"This it?" I ask through a whispered voice.

"Hard to get town people. Just go, I'll have more soon." The peacekeeper tells me urgently as he pushes people through the fence. Even in the moonlight, they can see my face and I can see theirs. They're surprised to see me but they know it's not the best tome to talk. As a group, we run for cover of the trees. Once there, we do a headcount. 12 total. We split into two groups of 6 with me leading one and Wyck leading the other. I take those who look like they can move faster and he takes the slower looking ones. This is the point where we'll likely have more distance between us. I'll probably lap his group.

"Alright, stay quiet and follow behind me. If you start to fall behind, call out just once and I'll slow down. Please push yourselves to go as fast as you can though. The faster we move, the faster I can get back here for the next group." I tell them in a still whispered but urgent voice. They all stare at me, nodding. They understand what it'll mean to be caught. To be captured trying to escape.

And with that we move, running as a group in a single line. Each person following the one in front of them. We aren't moving as fast as when I was coming through here alone but we're still making good time. Not once does anyone ask me to slow down. Not once does anyone fall behind. I get the group to the hovercraft sight and help them aboard. The medic hands me a bottle of water and I guzzle it down.

"Is this all? 6 people?" He asks as I drink.

"Yeah. Wyck has 6 for his hovercraft too. I'm heading back for more." I tell him as I hand back the empty bottle.

"We'll take this group and be back for you as fast as we can." He says and then the door closes as the craft prepares to take off.

I don't wait to watch, I just head back the same way I came, moving as fast as I can. I pass Wyck and his group halfway back. They're really moving slow. I don't stop to talk though. Just a nod and a glance as I shoot passed them. This is where I make up time I remind myself when my legs start to ache from the running. It's been too long since I ran like this and my body is tiring faster than I thought it would. Regardless, I push forward until I'm at the treeline again. I catch my breath for a moment and scan the fence, looking for a group. I spot them with the peacekeeper, more this time as he told me there would be.

"This is the last of the town I can get. Take your next run to the Seam. They have more there than they can handle. I already messaged the other runner's hovercrafts to let them know of the change of plans."

I nod and lead my new group towards the treeline. Once in the safety of tree cover I survey my group. I won't have the leisure of taking only the strongest this run so I'll have to move slower to accommodate the group. Headcount gives me a total of 27. It's a huge group. And I've got both children and adults.

"Okay, I'll need you all to move as fast as you can. It may be hard but I'll need you to really push yourselves. Stay quiet and keep moving, following me. If you can't keep up and need me to slow down, call out once and I'll wait."

They nod and murmur yes. I start to lead them and right away, I have to slow down. And then after just a short distance, slow even more. This group is too big and to mismatched in ability. I need to rethink my plan. We can't go this slow. It's too risky. If anyone at all was tailing us, they'd catch us in no time flat. I pause the group and survey it again.

"Okay, we need to change the way we're doing this. If we keep going at this slow of a pace, we'll never make it."

"We're doing the best we can!" One woman snips at me, folding her arms across her chest.

"And I'm telling you right now, your best isn't cutting it. If we don't speed up, the whole group is in danger. Okay, any of you carrying personal items, you need to drop them. Any extra weight will only slow us more."

A round of complaints start to come up as the materialistic town people imagine parting with their belongings. They don't have much anyway but there are a few of them toting backpacks or small bags.

"Seriously people, we do NOT have time for this! Drop whatever you can, now!" I order. They look at me, pausing before finally dropping their things.

"Okay, now, if you're stronger and able to, please put one of the smaller children on your backs. Even carrying them, I think we can move faster than if they walk alone. I can carry someone too."

A few of the men pick up children and one of the women does as well. There are still several who'll have to walk on their own. I look at them and pick up the weakest looking of the bunch, throwing him onto my back.

"Alright, we'll get going again. Move as fast as you can. Your lives and the lives of others are depending on it." I tell them before turning and continuing towards the pickup site. Even with this boy on my back, I'm moving swiftly. Faster than before. I turn back, looking to see how the rest of the group is doing and see that they're coming, but struggling to keep up. I can't let them rest yet though. We have to move fast. Have to keep going. The sooner I can get them to the site, the sooner I can make my way to the Seam and help there.

When we finally arrive at the site, the hovercraft is waiting for us. The medic hands me an orange flavored drink this time. "Electrolytes. Rehydrates you faster than plain water. You holding up okay?"

"Yeah. I'm heading back out. To the Seam this time."

The medic nods and says "Alright. Wyck headed that way too. Our pickup site stays the same though so you'll have further to lead the group. Time wise, it's probably going to be your last run. This run took a lot longer than we expected."

"Got it." I tell him as I wipe my face on my shirt. Even though it's freezing out here, I'm sweating like crazy from all this running.

"Who will collect our things?" A woman calls out to me in a snotty voice from the door of the hovercraft.

"What things?" The medic asks.

"The ones he made us drop on the way here." She says, pointing a finger at me.

"You had them leave personal items in the woods? On the path here?" The medic asks. As he says it, I only now realize that may have been a bad idea. It leaves proof. Proof that we were here. Proof that they were rescued. Shit. I can't believe I didn't think of that.

"Yeah. They couldn't carry it and run. It was slowing us down."

"It leaves remnants! You should have known better!" He barks before calling up to the communicator and telling him what I did. They discuss it as if I'm not even here and then finally I cut them off.

"Look, I was just trying to get them to hustle. I'll go back for the stuff myself. I'll get it and then head to the Seam. I can move fast, it'll be fine." I tell them.

"Go! Quickly!" The communicator tells me and I turn, running back again without even looking back.

It was so stupid of me to not think of that. To not realize I was leaving a trail of proof behind. So stupid. Now, I've made my run even more daunting. Not only did I add distance to my run, but now, I'm going to be responsible for carrying a bunch of crap. And going back this way again only adds more danger to myself. If by chance we were followed at all, I'll be running right back into them. I don't think we're being followed but you never know. I don't think we pulled enough people out of the town for it to be noticeable. Even still, as I near the area where we dropped the belongings, I slow and then pause behind a tree. I want to be extra cautious here. I wait. It looks all clear so I go for it, grabbing bags and slinging them over my shoulders as fast as I can.

I look around the groud to make certain I'm not missing anything and then just as I'm about to get moving again, I hear footsteps coming towards me in the dark. Panic hits me and I flip my night vision glasses on my face. I hadn't been wearing them because I know the woods so well but now I need them. I look all around and I don't see anyone but I still hear footsteps. I can't hide behind a tree too well with all this crap so I put my hand on my gun and wait. That's the only thing I know to do. I keep my eyes focused on the direction of the sounds and wait.

And then, my glasses pick up a figure in the distance. It's Wyck. He's coming back this way with his second group.

"Wyck! It's me, Gale!" I call out to him so he won't be startled by my presence. "Why are you coming back this way?"

They stop in front of me. He's got a huge group. Maybe more than the craft can hold. That's why I heard him so much sooner than I saw him. Because there's so many of them.

Out of breath, he struggles to speak to me. "It's the only way I knew to come. I wasn't sure if it would be faster to take a more direct route and I already knew what to expect on this terrain. What are you doing?" He asks.

"Long story. Look, can some of your people carry some of this stuff? I can get to the Seam a lot faster if you all can take some of it without it slowing you down."

"Yeah, we can." I hear a familiar voice answer me. It's Thom.

"Thom?" I ask as I hand over bags and he passes them back. "Are there a lot more waiting?"

"A lot. You're gonna have to hurry. It's starting to turn into a frenzy back in the Seam." He tells me.

"Thanks!" I call out to him as I begin running as fast as I can, moving easier now that I'm not lugging a bunch of bags. If Thom says there's a frenzy, it must be getting bad. I need to move fast. Faster than I have been. I hope Katniss has been able to get groups back to the pickup sites. I hope she's doing okay.

I can hear the chaos of the Seam before I even reach it. People are flooding through the fence and the few peacekeepers there aren't able to control the crowds. And noise is at an all time high. It's only a matter of minutes before the regular Peacekeepers are made aware of the commotion and come this way. I need to grab whoever I can and haul ass. I won't be able to get everyone. Not at all, not by a long shot. I grab a man as he reaches the treeline of the woods.

"Hey, I'm here to help. We need to gather a group and get moving. We don't have much time left before we're trapped out here and the Capitol comes for us." I tell him, hoping he'll be able to help me.

"Just grab anybody?" He asks me.

"Anybody we can. But if they're stronger, we can move faster." I tell him. I don't want to leave anyone behind but I have a real sense that time is running out and weak and feeble won't be able to make this trip. They just won't.

"Got it." The man tells me and together we work to collect a group amidst the chaos. We've just begun running through the woods, back towards the pick up site when I hear the whistles of real Peacekeepers in the background. We're out of time. There won't be anymore rescue runs. We'll be lucky if we get back to the pick up site ourselves.

"Faster! We have to run faster!" I yell back at the group. They're keeping pace, fear and adrenaline fueling them as they run blindly through the woods behind me. They know what the whistles mean too. They know we're in real danger of getting caught if we can't move fast enough. Silently, we run as we listen to the noise fading behind us.

_**A/N: Two chapters in one day makes for a very good day don't you think? ;) **_

_**Hope you enjoyed it!**_


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

(Gale POV)

My legs keep moving long after I've lost feeling in them. My head feels dizzy and my stomach aches. We're so close to the pick up site now. Just a little more and we can get the hell out of here and I can get home to Madge. The group is running just as swiftly as I am still. These people, Seam people, are much easier to work with than that last town group I had. The town group didn't seem to understand that they had to hustle. These people though, know all too well what will happen if we miss this hovercraft or if we're caught.

We've covered too far a distance for us to be able to hear the whistles of the Peacekeepers anymore. I try not to think about what's happening now back in the Seam. Try hard not to picture the wrath that's being had upon innocent people who weren't lucky enough to escape. I know when this is all said and done that I'll feel guilt for not having moved faster. Guilt over having to leave people behind even though I knew going into this that would have to happen. I knew we couldn't save everyone. Wouldn't that have been better though? Wouldn't it have been great to see the look on Snow's face when he was informed that every trace of life in 12 had somehow disappeared? If all that remained where useless houses and belongings. Not a soul in sight. As if we'd all vanished into thin air? Yes. That would have been far more enjoyable than the reality. In reality, we only made a dent. Only saved a mere handful in comparison to those that Snow will kill as he destroys the district.

When the hovercraft is in sight, the engines are already roaring to life and the Medic is hanging out the door, furiously waving us toward him. Calling out to us. Yelling over the roar of the engines for us to hurry.

"Come on! We have to leave right now!" He screams at us.

My group launches themselves through the doorway and I throw myself through just as the door closes behind me. We literally used every second we could. Had we been 10 seconds slower, they would have had to leave without us. We would have been stranded out here in the woods of 12 until they could try and come for us again. And there's no way to know how long that could be. Hours, days. Maybe even months. Maybe never. God, I can't even think about it.

Once aboard, I collapse on the floor, unable to move, overtaken with exhaustion. I feel us begin to move. My eyes close. I don't even have the strength to hold them open. My breathing is labored and I start to lose consciousness as I feel the Medic tugging at my arm. Something pinching at my hand. Something warm moving up my arm, as if inside it somehow. And then, everything just goes black. Silent and still and black.

When I come too, my head is pounding and I no longer feel movement of the hovercraft. I'm in bed. I'm aware of a small hand in mine. My eyes open and adjust to the lights and I see Madge, her hand pressed into mine, asleep with her head resting on my bedside. She's here. Waiting for me. I gently squeeze her hand and she wakes suddenly, sitting upright instantly.

"Gale! You're awake!"

"Hey beautiful. Miss me?" I say with a grin. God, she's so incredibly beautiful to me that just the sight of her here, waiting for me to wake up sends my heart soaring.

She doesn't answer, just presses her lips to mine and kisses me. I pull her up onto the bed and she lays alongside me, still kissing me. She did miss me. I can tell. She really is falling for me again and this is proof of just how deeply she's falling.

"I was so worried you wouldn't make it back to me!" She finally says and tears spring to her eyes.

"Hey, don't cry. I'm here and everything is just fine. I'm not even hurt. Everything's just fine." I whisper as I hug her to me tightly. She sobs into my chest as I hold her.

"You weren't awake! You got back but you weren't awake. They sent for me and they told me you'd passed out on the way back. They had to give you oxygen and fluids but you still didn't wake up. When I got here, you were so still. You've been out for hours. It was so scary, Gale!" And she buries her face in my chest again.

"Hey, hey, stop. I promise I'm fine! I was just exhausted is all. It was a lot of running around and I just wore myself out. I'm not hurt, I'm fine. Totally fine." I reassure her as I hold her tight and run my hands through her hair.

A medic pops through the door and Madge sits up. "How are we feeling Mr. Hawthorne?" She asks as she undoes the iv that's been hooked to my hand.

"Good. I'm good."

"You should be alright to go home now. Seems you had a little bout of dehydration and some effects of exhaustion. We infused fluids and that should help the dehydration. You may have a lingering headache or dry mouth for a little while longer but those should fade over the next few hours. You're on work release for the next 24 hours, your supervisor has already been notified." She tells me as she scribbles on a chart and then has me sign myself out of the Medical Center. She's nice but seems hurried though maybe that's always how it is down here. Maybe that's just the way it works.

I slip my boots back on, hoping that I'll be able to just keep them this time instead of turning them back in. The medic doesn't seem to notice so I don't ask about it. Just tie them and then take Madge's hand as we head out of the Medical Center.

Once in the hallway, I realize why the medic seemed so hurried. The place is packed, people everywhere. Lined all along the hallways.

"What's going on?" I ask not really to anyone in particular.

"I think some of the people were injured trying to escape to the hovercrafts." Madge says quietly.

I look around, suddenly recognizing faces from 12. Seam mostly. No one looks to be overly injured. Seems like lots of blistered feet from all the running in footwear that was already in bad shape. Some exhaustion for those who weren't in great physical condition. Some just trying to warm up having nearly frozen without coats.

"Have you seen Katniss? Do you know if she made it back okay?" I ask Madge.

"No, I went straight to your room. We can try to find her if you want."

"Yeah, I just wanna make sure she made it back alright. It was kinda crazy there at the end."

I lead us over to the reception desk and wait for the clearly busy worker to acknowledge us. When he looks up finally, I ask about Katniss.

"Do you know if Katniss Everdeen has been here? She worked the rescue mission tonight."

He sighs. "Even if I knew, I couldn't tell you. That would be privledged information. If you have questions, you should address them directly to the Defense Department." His attitude urks me and I'm about to say something about it but Madge cuts me off.

"Thank you anyway." Madge says politely as she tugs my hand, leading me away. "Come on, we'll go ask Haymitch." She tells me as we exit.

In the defense department, there's a lot going on but nowhere near as much commotion as in the Medical Center. I ask at the front desk to speak with Haymitch and the worker tells us to have a seat. She then calls him to come out for us.

"Hey kiddo, let's talk a walk. Too much going on right now for me to deal with the trouble of getting you two clearance to come back to my office." He says as he appears before us and we follow him out of the Defense Department lobby. He leads us over to the stairwell before he turns to us.

"Alright. I know you're probably wanting to know how she is, if she's okay or not. I'll tell you what I know as of yet."

"Did something happen to Katniss?" I ask in alarm. He seemed all to ready for my arrival. Like he was waiting for me to come to him.

"She's in surgery. Should be out in about an hour or so. There was a whole lot of commotion there at the end of the mission. She was trying to gather her last group and they were just starting on the way back to the pick up site when a fight broke out between her group a few stragglers who'd followed them, hoping to join them. She attempted to break up the fight and was caught up in the scuffle, got knocked to the ground and then trampled a bit. Broke her leg. Shattered it actually. They're piecing her back together right now."

"Oh my God. How'd she manage to get back to the site like that?"

"A couple bigger guys in the group carried her. She had to tell em which way to go. Without her, they weren't getting anywhere."

"And the guys who started the fight? Did they make it back here?"

"Not that I know of. It's all still being looked into. All in all, she's lucky. Coulda been a lot worse. I suggest you get on home now and rest yourself."

"Thanks for the information. If you see her when she wakes up, will you tell her I asked about her? That I'll come see her later?"

"Sure thing kiddo." He says then he shuffles back towards the Defense Department without another word.

As I go over what he said, things flood back into my mind. The chaos and the craziness that was happening at the Seam. How they had so many people and how the Peacekeepers had been coming, blowing their whistles and furthering the panicked feeling at the fence. Haymitch is right. It really could have been a lot worse than a busted up leg. She's super lucky she was able to get out of there. I'm definitely gonna go talk to her tomorrow if she's up to it. If I know her though, she's gonna be all kinds of irritated about her leg and having to rest up for the next several weeks while it heals.

Once Madge and I are almost home, she stops us. "Gale, we should probably go let Rory know that you're okay."

"Rory? How'd he know about this? I didn't tell my family." I ask in surprise. I hadn't intentionally not told them, there just wasn't enough time to think about it.

"Prim told him about Katniss and when I told him you were busy on a project with her, he put two and two together figuring it out. He stayed with me all night until they sent for me saying you were back."

"He did?"

"Yeah, he was really great actually. Let me cry all over his shoulder and everything." She says looking both grateful and embarrassed.

"Good. You two always had some sort of special bond. I'm glad he stayed with you. Glad you weren't alone though I hate to hear that you were crying." It makes me happy to hear that Rory was there for her. I knew she'd be uneasy with me gone but I had no idea that she'd be so upset. And I do like knowing that she and Rory are becoming close again. The friendship they shared was important to both of them and I know Rory's missed that since Madge lost her memory.

She shrugs. "Couldn't help it. I was worried. More so than I expected I would be. As soon as you left, all I wanted was for you to come back."

"Well, no need to worry anymore. I'm back and I don't plan to go anywhere anytime soon. I won't leave you, I promise." I tell her as I squeeze her hand.

She smiles up at me and her face looks relieved but like there's something else there that I can't quite pinpoint. She looks away before I can figure it out. We walk to my family's home in silence. A comfortable one. A tired one. Once we let Rory know that I'm just fine, we head home to our own place.

Inside, I feel exhaustion creeping back up on me and the sight of my own bed only makes me feel it that much more. I'd love nothing more than to just crawl under those blankets and sleep for the next five hours however, I know I need to shower first. I kick off my boots and head into the bathroom. The steam of the shower and warm water is soothing on my tired body. I lean my forehead on the tile and let the water run over me. I don't think I've ever been so worn out in my life as I am right now. I turn off the water and dry off, pulling on pajama pants and a t-shirt.

Back out in the bedroom, I find Madge already in bed but still awake. I give her a smile before turning down the lights and collapsing on top of the bed. My pillow never felt so soft, I swear it. Madge just lays next to me, her fingers lightly tracing circles at the nape of my neck as I start to drift off. I'm almost asleep, so much so that I first think I must be dreaming when I hear her. But then I realize that I'm not. That I am awake and she did just utter those words I've so longed to hear her speak. I love you. Quiet as a whisper. I love you.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

(Gale POV)

My breath catches in my chest and I roll over to face Madge. Her eyes widen for just a second. I think she thought I'd already fallen asleep. She hadn't thought I'd hear her.

"What did you just say?" I ask, my face just inches from hers.

"I…I said I love you." She whispers again, stuttering as she speaks.

My lips don't wait one second before crashing into hers, kissing her intensely. Those words making it impossible for me to hold back. Making it impossible not to kiss her with all the emotion I feel right now. Those words I haven't heard cross her lips in so very long. My hands grab onto her, pulling her to me. Her response mirrors mine, kissing me back with equal emotion.

"I love you too. So much." I whisper in her ear as my lips trail down her jaw. "You have no idea how much I've wanted to hear you say that."

"I only just realized it today. When you left." Her breathless voice explains as my kisses find the curve of her neck, my hands on her waist. She arches her back, sighing softly. The sound of it ringing like music in my ears. Her hands clutch at my shirt and then I feel her mouth against the skin of my neck. A thrill surges through me and I need more. More of this. More of her. More of my Madge. I roll over and hover above her, my face just over hers. Even with the lights down low, I can see the look in her eyes. Vulnerable and dancing with excitement. She reaches up and pulls my face down to hers. Her lips pressing against mine as her fingers run through my hair and then trace over my neck and shoulders. I move my hands slowly down her sides until they rest on her hips, pressing against her, needing to be closer. When her hands tug at the hem of my shirt, I don't fight her on it. My arms raise and I let her slide it upwards, over my head, tossing it aside. When I feel her tongue graze over my collar bone, a moan escapes me. One of my hands finds one of hers and our fingers intertwine. It feels unbelievable to be able to be with her like this again, to have this closeness, this togetherness. My free hand moves, running up her thigh and she shudders beneath me.

"I've missed this so much." I breathe into her ear before planting kisses along her neck, down onto her shoulder. Every bit of my being wants to devour her, ravish her. I've held back for so long, waited so long, missed her so much. And it was all worth it. Every second of it. Somehow she's fallen in love with me all over again. Somehow she's completely mine again. Boldly, wantonly, I strip off her nightshirt, seeing her for the first time in so long, it takes my breath away. Our eyes lock with each other and I swear all time stands still. She's mine and I'm hers and for once, at long last, everything is exactly as it should be. Her lips meet mine again and we melt together, utterly lost and consumed in one another.

Later as she rests her head against my chest, I run my fingers through her long blonde hair. I'm a whole mess of emotions and feelings right now. Love, exhiliration, exhaustion, completeness. All because this one girl fell in love with me again.

"Hey, you asleep yet?" I whisper to her.

"Mmmm. Not quite yet." She murmurs, snuggling closer to me.

"I have something for you." I say softly as I slide out from under her. She yawns and sits up as I turn up the lights a little then go over to the drawer of the nightstand.

Back on the bed, I sit across from her and she eyes me curiously. "I've been holding onto this for you, until you might want to wear it again." I tell her as I hold out her wedding ring.

Stunned, she stares at it, looks up at me and then again at the ring before she finally can speak. "I have a wedding ring?"

I smile a little as I take her hand and slip it on her finger. "Of course you have a ring silly."

"I just assumed…I mean, I never even thought…Where did you…" She stammers making a mess of her words as her cheeks flush the loveliest shade of pink.

I laugh before explaining. "It's a family heirloom. When we got engaged, my mother gave it to me for you. It was my grandmother's before that. They took it off you in the Medical Center and gave it to me."

"Why didn't you ever tell me about it? It's so beautiful."

"I wasn't exactly trying to keep it a secret or anything. It's just that everything was so overwhelming for you. I mean, you wake up and find out you have a husband and a whole life you don't remember and I just figured the last thing you'd want was for me to expect you to wear this ring. I didn't want you to feel obligated about it."

"Oh Gale!" She exclaims as she leans forward, kissing me. "I love you."

"I'm never gonna tire of hearing you say that." I grin. And I mean it, I really mean it. After weeks of never being able to hear her say it, I hope nothing more than to hear her say it over and over again.

(Madge POV)

When I wake up, Gale's still fast asleep, his arms wrapped all around me as he hugs me against his chest. His bare chest. I close my eyes and inhale, taking in the memories of last night. It was more than I ever could have imagined. So perfectly perfect. Thrilling so that even now, hours later, I doubt I could hide the smile plastered across my face.

I hadn't meant for him to hear me say it. I'd thought he was sleeping. He'd been so exhausted and worn out when we got back here and the only reason I'd even whispered it was that it was all I could think about as he lay there next to me, safe and sound. Him leaving may have been scary for me, much more so than I expected it to be, but in the end I'm so glad that he went. After all, it was his leaving that brought me to recognize that what I was feeling was love. That I'd fallen for him all over again.

When he rolled over and asked me what I'd said it startled me. I knew then that he'd heard me. I repeated it for him and in a moment like no other I can remember, he'd kissed me so intensely, so deeply. He had definitely been hold back on me when we were kissing any time before this. This was so much more. And for once, when I wanted more of it, more of him, he hadn't stopped us. My admission was all he needed to feel comfortable going there with me again. For him it was revisiting territory we'd been too before. For me, it was all new. For me, it was as if it were the first time all over again. I had no idea it would be so incredible. It was like the floaty, blissful feeling I always felt when we kissed but better. Euphorically blissful.

And then, as I lay my head against his chest, drifting off to sleep, he'd surprised me. He'd returned my wedding ring. I didn't even know I had a ring. And it was so beautiful. So very, very beautiful. Delicate and simple. I'd always just assumed that I didn't have one, that it wasn't something Gale could have afforded. Most Seam marriages didn't have rings and if they did, it was just a plain band, never a diamond. The shock of it had me stumbling over my own words and thankfully, he hadn't been insulted but rather found it comical. He'd explained that it was a family heirloom. That his own mother gave it to us. This was hard to even fathom because Hazelle's husband had died in the mines years ago. This was very likely all she had left of him by way of material things. For her to offer that to me, to us, it meant so much. She truly thinks of me as part of her family.

I have no idea how my mind managed to forget such powerful, wonderful things as what I'd had last night. Head injury or not, it was had to imagine I would ever know what it felt like to be that loved so much. Being with Gale, like that, would not be something I'd forget about twice. Wouldn't be possible. I also have no idea how he, having not ever forgotten what it felt like, could manage to restrain himself, to hold back for my sake while I fell in love again. It's just one more way that shows just how much he does in fact love me. It's the only way he could have possibly held back like that. Because he loves me so very much.

But now that we were back on the same level again, now that we were whole again, I had no intentions of making him wait for anything ever again. God, I'm never going to be able to stop smiling, I think to myself. I'm so giddy that I find myself pressing kisses to his chest, lightly running my fingers up and down his stomach. I hadn't meant to wake him up, he was so tired but I was so lost in my thoughts and memories of last night, I'd kissed him awake.

"Hey there." His sleepy voice whispers as I feel his lips against my temple.

"Sorry, didn't mean to wake you up." I say as I plant one more feathery kiss on his skin.

"Mmm, it's fine. You sleep good?" He yawns.

"Yeah. Go back to sleep if you want."

"No way." He smiles. "Feels like it could have all been a dream. I'm glad it wasn't."

I feel myself blush and I hide my face in his chest, biting my lip. "I'm glad it wasn't either." I tell him, still hiding my face.

"Don't go hiding that pretty face on me now." He teases only furthering my blushing as he pulls back a little so he can see me. He's smiling just as much as I am. We're going to look like two newlyweds with grins like this on our faces all day.

"Wanna go get some breakfast?" He asks me.

"Um, I think we missed that. We might still be able to make it to lunch though." I say as I gesture to the clock.

"Oh man, I had no idea we'd slept so long." He says, sitting up and then wincing as he did.

"You okay?" I ask, alarmed at his sudden wincing.

"Yeah, just really sore is all."

"What hurts?" I ask.

"Everything except my heart." He flirts.

I roll my eyes at his cheesiness but love it just the same. "Well after we eat maybe we can stop by the Medical Center and get something for that. I'm sure they have something to ease muscle pain."

"Okay. Come on, let's get up." He agrees, nodding to me.

He's about three steps away from the bathroom door when he stops and points at the floor. "Did Posy do that?"

I follow his finger's pointing and see the purple letters written on the floor. P-O-S-Y. "Yeah, don't be mad though. I told her it was okay."

"I'm not mad. I didn't even know she could write her name. Guess that school here is paying off."

"Nope, I taught her last night. She was practicing it and ran out of paper and in her excitement, it ended up on the floor. Rory was ready to kill her but I didn't care. Honestly, I kind of like it. Gives this place a little character."

"You taught my little sister to write her name?" He asks looking at me with amazement.

"Yes."

"God, I love you." He says shaking his head as he comes over, kisses me and grabs my hand, leading me into the bathroom with him, his arm slinking around my waist as he pulls me against him. He leads me into the shower, peeling away our clothes between kisses. The steamy water only amplifies the blissful feeling of his touch and I find myself leaning back against the shower wall as he kisses down my neck. By the time we're finished with one another the water has long since run cold and I'm almost certain we won't make it to lunch on time. We dress quickly after drying off, hoping we'll be able to catch the end of the lunch service if we hurry.

"You're going to make us miss lunch if you don't stop that." I tell him when he comes up behind me and I feel his lips against my neck, his arm around my waist, pulling me back against him.

"Lunch is overrated." He replies, his words muffled by my hair.

"Gale Hawthorne!" I giggle as I playfully pull away, resisting him. I would love to stay here like this with him all day but we should eat. Neither of us ate breakfast and he must be starving because I know for a fact I am.

He groans but takes my hand and leads us for the door anyway, stealing one more kiss before opening it. Out in the hall, smile like kids in love as we make our way to the cafeteria. There, we surprisingly make it in plenty of time to get our food trays and end up having to search for a place to sit because it's so crowded in here. All the new people from 12 are here and it's strange to see so many familiar faces. Not necessarily faces that I can personally put names with but faces I've seen in 12. And I get more than a few looks myself. Guess they recognize me too. We end up sitting with Gale's old friend Thom and a couple other guys he knew from the mines. I don't know Thom personally, or well, I don't remember him anyway, except that I always saw him around with Gale at school.

"Well if it isn't the lovebirds who started this whole mess." Thom teases as we sit down.

"Shut up. Would you rather be sitting down in the mines or sitting here eating lunch?" Gale jokingly reminds him.

"Point taken." Thom replies with a few accompanying nods from the other guys.

"Seriously though, this place isn't all bad once you get used to it. " Gale tells them. "You'll see."

"So what gives anyway man? You two know the whole time about this place? How on earth did you ever find it?"

"We were just as surprised about 13 being here as you were. Our escapes, mine from the arena and his from 12, were done without our having anything to do with them. Something my parents helped arrange a long time ago as a back up plan for the reaping." I explain as I swallow down my bite of sandwich.

"Really? Huh. You'd never know your father had anything to do with it, what with all his pleading videos and all. You'd think he knew nothing about where you were." Thom says.

I stop chewing my food and stare at him. Pleading videos? What is he talking about? Is there something I don't remember that Gale hasn't mentioned? What videos?

"Uh, Thom, we don't get video feeds down here. Madge hasn't seen any videos." Gale says quietly. I don't fail to notice that he says Madge hasn't seen any videos, not we haven't seen any videos. Something gives me a feeling he knows what Thom is talking about. Like I'm the only one at this table who doesn't know some big secret.

"What videos?" I ask. My voice is flat as I speak and I avoid making eye contact with Gale, looking only directly at Thom.

"Just some viewing stuff. Didn't, um, realize they don't show those here." He mumbles uncomfortable shifting in his chair.

"What videos?" I repeat.

"The Capitol went nuts when you guys all disappeared. They had your father tape some messages, asking you to turn yourself in." He finally tells me.

My father had a message for me? And no one told me about it? A message that apparently was on viewings for all of Panem? We may not get viewings here but Gale's looking awfully guilty. Like he's seen them or at the very least knew about them.

"If you'll excuse me." I say as I get up from the table. I refuse to sit there at a table full of basically strangers from 12 watch me get upset over this. As I'm walking away, I hear Thom tell Gale that he's sorry and I hear Gale's chair push back as he stands to follow me. He catches up to me, takes my hand and doesn't say anything. Once we're in the stairwell, he stops and I look at him waiting for him to explain.

"Madge, I didn't know there multiple videos. I only saw one, right after we got here. Haymitch and Katniss showed it to me and wanted to know if I thought you could handle seeing it yet."

"Obviously you decided I couldn't handle it." I point out, folding my arms over my chest. The happiness I was feeling prior to lunch fading, giving way to anger. How could he know something like this and keep it from me?

"It was too much. All of it. You were so overwhelmed with your head injury and with trying to adapt to having this whole life you can't remember and it just seemed like if I told you about it or showed it to you that you might break. You just seemed so fragile at that point."

"That doesn't mean I don't deserve to know about this. He's still my father."

"I know he is. But I also know that message isn't really him. It's not him talking to you, it's the Capitol. They're the ones making him say it. Trust me, it wasn't a message from him."

"Trust you?" I practically snort. "That's comical considering I just found out you've been keeping a secret like this from me. Is there anything else you think I'm not able to handle? Any more things you decided I don't need to know about?"

"Madge, please don't be upset about this. You have to understand, I just didn't want you to have to bare anymore upsetting news. You were struggling so much as it was in the beginning. I thought it would crush you." He pleads softly, desperately trying to get me to see his reasoning. He reaches out for my arms but I resist, keeping them folded across my chest.

I feel so betrayed and so anger right now and all I want is to be alone. I don't want to talk about this anymore with him and I just want to be by myself. I turn and begin making my way up the stairs as hot tears pool in the corners of my eyes. I hear Gale start to follow me and I know I can't look back at him without losing it right now. "Don't. Don't follow me right now." I choke out without looking back. And he doesn't.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

(Madge POV)

I'm glad he doesn't follow me this time. I don't want to be around him right now and I don't want to fight either. I just want to think all this over in my head and decide how I feel about it all. I'm wiping tears from my eyes as I round the corner and smack right into Rory.

"Madge? What's wrong?" He asks immediately concerned at the sight of my tearstained face.

I just shake my head. "I'm okay."

"You don't look okay. Want me to go find Gale for you?"

"No. I just need to be alone right now. Need to think some stuff over. But I'm fine, really."

"You and Gale had a fight, huh?" He says, giving me a knowing look.

I just look at him, tears pouring down my cheeks again.

"Come on, let's go talk somewhere. I promise I'm a really good listener."

I recall what Gale had said yesterday about how Rory and I had been very close friends back home and I decide that maybe talking to a friend is just what I need. Maybe just talking it through will give me a little clarity. I look to Rory and nod. He gives me a half smile and leads me towards his house.

"Is your family home?" I ask cautiously. I don't want to discuss this with everyone listening. Just Rory.

"Nah. Ma's at work and Vick and Posy are still in school. The lower grades had some kind of activity after classes today. Nobody will hear us talk."

"Okay."

Once there, we sit down and he just looks at me for a minute. I don't know where to even start. "Did you know that right after we all came here, that President Snow had viewings all over Panem? With my father pleading for me to turn myself in?"

The shock on his face lets me know right away that he wasn't aware of it. "No, I didn't know."

"Me either. But Gale did and he didn't tell me about it. My father sent a personal plea to me, broadcast over the entire country and Gale didn't tell me. Him and Katniss both knew about it this whole time."

"Did he say why he hadn't told you?" Rory asks calmly. Not taking sides, not judging. Just listening.

"He said I was too fragile. That I seemed so overwhelmed with everything as it was that he was sure it would be too much for me to handle."

"What do you think about it? Would it have been too much for you?"

I stop and think about this. My instinct was to be angry that Gale withheld something from me. I hadn't really stopped and done what Rory just asked. I hadn't stopped to think if it really would have been too much for me to handle or not. I close my eyes and try to picture how my first days and weeks were here in 13. It was true that I'd been overwhelmed. I was overwhelmed and uncomfortable. Everything was foreign to me and scary almost. I'd woken up in an unfamiliar place, found out I was married to Gale, who at the time I didn't know, discovered my father had poisoned my mother, that all my family was locked away in the Capitol, and that I'd been sent into the games as a cruel twist of a marital contract. It had been a massive amount to take in. And it had felt unbearable. Suffocating even.

"I'm just…I feel so betrayed that all this time he knew about it."

"Madge, I can't even imagine what it's like to go through all you've had to deal with since you woke up here but I do know that Gale is crazy about you. He would never do anything to hurt you. Ever. So if he decided that something might be too much for you, then it was probably coming from a place of good intentions."

"That doesn't make me feel any less foolish."

"That's just because you're looking at it all wrong. Don't feel foolish, feel loved. He loves you so much that he wanted to protect you from any further heartache since you were already trying to make sense of so much. He made the decision to not tell you about the video because he loves you."

His words ring through my ears making more sense than anything I was personally thinking. He's so very right. He's so right. I'm just looking at it wrong is all. "Rory, you are wise beyond your years, you know that? Thanks for the perspective." I tell him, giving him my most grateful smile. And then the smile doesn't feel grateful enough so I lean forward and give him a hug.

"Ehh, it was nothing. Like I said, I'm a good listener. Anytime you wanna talk, feel free to come find me." He says with a shrug as if it were nothing.

"No, really, thank you. Gale told me that you and I used to be really close. It's nice knowing that we're friends."

"Not just friends, family." He says with a smile. "Now go find Gale and smooth this all out. He's probably stressing like crazy."

"I will, thanks again!" I call out over my shoulder as I head out the door, ready to go straighten this out with Gale. I need to apologize for getting upset, for overreacting.

(Gale POV)

It was hard not to follow her. I know she's upset with me and that's fine, but I just wish I could get her to see that I wasn't trying to withhold information or keep secrets from her. I just didn't want her to have to know about the video from her father. For starters, there was nothing she could do about it anyways. Secondly, it was all Snow speaking. Her father wasn't really calling out for her. Snow was. And I'll be damned if I ever let him get his hands on her again. Thirdly, it would have just been one more difficult thing for her to have to deal with and her plate was full enough as it was. I didn't want it to be a tipping point that would take her under completely. And more than anything, most importantly, I'd really thought I was making the right decision. And I did it out of love. My motives had been completely pure. But how in the world do I get her to see that now? The look in her eyes was the most brutal part of it all. She'd looked so betrayed.

I didn't follow her because I didn't want her to be even more upset. If she needs a little space, I can give her that. For a couple hours or so. I hope that's all she needs. I hope she won't pull away for longer. It'll kill me. It really will. Especially after we've made so much progress in getting back to us. I just got her love back, I can't lose it now. Not again. Not ever.

I decide it would be a good time for me to go check on Katniss. When I'm done seeing her, I can go look for Madge and try again to explain and apologize. Down in the Medical Center, it's much calmer than it was before. No hallways full of waiting refugees from 12. The worker at the front desk lets me know what room I can find Katniss in and I make my way down the long hallways, looking for her room number. When I find it, the door is closed and I peek through the little window on it to be sure it's okay for me to visit. She's laying in bed, leg hanging up in some sort of device. She looks miserable.

I knock as I open the door. "Feel like some company?"

She shoots me a glare but it's a teasing one and I know it well enough. I enter and take a sit in the chair by her bed.

"Looks like you survived the mission a little better than I did."

"Yeah but I almost didn't if that makes you feel any better. My hovercraft was literally taking off as I got there with my last group. If we'd been even five seconds slower, we would have been stuck out there."

"Geez Gale. Why'd you cut it so close?"

"Didn't intend too. It was crazy. I managed three runs though. Two in town, one for the Seam."

"You did a Seam run?"

"Yeah, my last one. They didn't have enough people in town. Sent me and Wyck to Seam to help out since there were so many there."

"I did four runs. The first three were smooth but that last one, well, this is what I have to show for it." She grumbles as she gestures to her leg.

"What's the prognosis? You gonna be on your feet again anytime soon?"

"I wish. I'm down for at least six to eight weeks. Then I get to do some super fun physical therapy for another six weeks after that. And that's assuming everything heals as planned. If not, I may be looking at more surgeries."

"Sheesh. Rough prognosis. What are you gonna do for six to eight weeks?"

"Probably lose my mind." She jokes sarcastically. "But really, I'll still be working with the Defense Department. Just no missions anytime soon. And a lot more sitting down."

"Hey, did you know that there was more than just the one video of Madge's father played over Panem?"

She looks surprised for a second before answering. "Yeah…I did. Who told you though? It's supposed to be classified."

"Oh, Thom shared it with Madge and I at lunch. Everyone from 12 saw it firsthand-it isn't classified anymore."

"Oh. Didn't think about that yet. So Madge knows now too, huh?"

"Yeah, she knows. And she's not happy that we kept it from her. She's actually not even talking to me right now."

"It wasn't like she could have done anything about it even if we'd told her. She'll get over it." Katniss shrugs as if it issn't a big deal. And really, I guess to her it isn't.

"You should've seen her face. She looked so betrayed. And the worst part is that just last night, she finally told me that she loves me again and now, just hours later, she isn't even speaking to me."

"She loves you again, huh? I'll never be able to wrap my head around that. Gale Hawthorne and Madge Undersee. That's just not something I ever expected to come home too. But for what it's worth, I've never seen two people look so right together as you two do. She'll get over this Gale, she will."

"Thanks. What's the deal with you and Mellark these days?"

I get another teasing glare from her before she really answers. "I don't know. I find myself wanting to be with him and then other times it just seems impossible. Thankfully, he's a very patient person."

"You should just go for it already. Being in love, it's the most incredible feeling I've ever had. You'd probably like it if you'd just let yourself be with him already. I can tell you like him. It's so obvious."

"Yeah, maybe so." She sighs and I can tell this is as far as she'll be letting the conversation go. She's not one to talk about her feelings and it isn't like us to do so. I only asked because it's rare to get her like this. Rare for her and I to spend much time alone. Back before her games, we were always together. It won't ever be like it was before. We're both too different people now. But it is nice to have this friendship, even if it's different than it once was.

"The videos of Madge's father, were they pretty much all the same?"

"No. They got progressively worse as it went along. Each one had him looking just a little more crazed than the one before. Between you and I, I think he's taken the brunt of the fallout from our disappearance."

"Can't we do anything about it? Can't we rescue him somehow?"

"A rescue mission? Out of a Capitol Prison?" She asks pointedly with raised eyebrows.

"It could work. If we had enough insiders to help."

"It would never work." She says shaking her head.

"I just wish there was something we could do. For Madge's sake."

"Wishes and dreams my friend, wishes and dreams."

"Tell me about it."

We sit in silence for a few minutes as we both think about how much we wish things were different. How we wish Snow was around. How we wish there were no games. It would be so much better for every single person that way. But she's right. Nothing but wishes and dreams. No way will we ever have a completely free Panem.

"I'm gonna go try to talk to Madge again. I'll come by and see you again tomorrow if I can."

"Thanks. I have a feeling I'll be going a little stir crazy by then. Probably would appreciate the company."

I leave and try to figure out where to begin looking for Madge. And also what it is I can say to make her understand. I go by our place but find it empty and seemingly untouched. She doesn't appear to have been here. Where else would she go if she wanted to think or be alone? Not to my family's house. No way to be alone there. I was just in the Medical Center and I didn't see her there so I know she hasn't gone to talk to her therapist or anything. The agriculture center? To sit on the benches by the trees? Maybe. I head that way and just as I enter the area with the trees, I see her. She's here. Not sitting though, walking this way though she hasn't spotted me yet. I pause and wait so she can see me. I hope whatever look crosses her face will give me a clue as to where I might stand with her right now.

"Gale! There you are!" She exclaims as soon as her eyes spot me. She quickens her pace, heading towards me. Good, I think to myself. This is good. It means I have a chance to make this better.

"Hey, I was looking for you. Feel like talking?" I ask as she reaches me.

"I was just looking for you too. Been all over the place."

"I was in the Medical Center, checking on Katniss." I explain.

"Oh. I hadn't looked there yet. Anyway, I do want to talk to you though." She says, biting her bottom lip a little. Like she's nervous or something.

"Come on, let's go home. It'll be more private there."

As we walk, we are both silent and then I feel her small hand slip into mine. Even better I think. She's not angry anymore, that's for sure. Relief floods through me. We might just be okay.

Back in the privacy of our own place, she sits on the bed, patting the spot next to her for me to sit too. I do.

"Listen Madge, I really want…" I begin before she holds up her hand to cut me off.

"Wait Gale. I just need you to listen for a minute, okay?" She says softly, not angrily at all.

I nod and wait.

"I want to apologize to you for how I reacted to finding out about the videos. I'm sorry. And I want you to know that I was wrong for being angry with you. I wasn't looking at the situation in the right way. My instinct, however wrong, was to feel as if you'd done something behind my back but really all you were doing was trying to love me. I realize that now."

"I promise I didn't keep it from you for any reason other than I didn't want it to hurt you more than everything already had. I promise."

"I know that. I do. And while I still wish you would have told me about it, I do understand why you didn't."

"And I only knew about the one video clip. I never knew it kept going. You'd been having such a hard time with everything that when they asked me if I thought you should see it, I told them no, not yet. I'm sorry that I made the wrong decision. I really am."

"Gale, stop. It's okay. I just overreacted. I don't blame you. I know you made the decision for what you thought was best at the time."

"So we're okay? Us?" I ask her, just to make sure. Just to hear her say that we are.

"As long as you can forgive me for how I acted earlier." She says, her face both apologetic and hopeful.

"Guess that makes us both forgiven then." I say with a smile. It feels so wonderful knowing that everything is okay between us again. It may have been a small tiff but she's just so precious, so important to me that any problem will always feel huge.

"Guess so." She grins back and then I can't help but pull her to me, kissing her as we fall backward onto the bed. She's laying over me, kissing me in a way that stirs my desires for her. I run my hands downward over her back and onto the curve of her hips. Her mouth moves over my cheek and down over my jaw, onto my neck. A quiet moan escapes my throat and I feel her hands snake underneath my shirt, hands running over my stomach. I pull at her shirt, peeling it away from her, her skin smooth beneath my hands. Just seeing her, hovering above me, nearly takes my breath away.

"You are so exquisite, so beautiful." I tell her, staring at her with nothing but want. She smiles and her cheeks blush. I love how she blushes in moments like this.

When her lips move against mine again, I feel her hands lingering at the waistband of my pants. Her fingertips running lightly underneath it. Teasingly so. The craving I have for her intensifies and I have to have her. I roll us over and pull my shirt off. Her hands working to unfasten the button of my pants and I shove them off. I slide downwards as I kiss her face, then her neck and down over her chest. Her fingers knot in my hair and she gasps as my mouth reaches just beneath her navel. My tongue trails teasing kisses over her stomach. When she arches her back and utters my name in a breathy voice, I move back up to kiss her, running my hands up her thighs. She says it again, "Gale" all breathless and wanting, making me lose all control and give myself over, desperately needing her.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

(Madge POV)

"If this is what happens after we have a fight, I think I might have to become more disagreeable going forward." I tease as I lay, sprawled across our bed, tangled in Gale's arms and the blankets.

He laughs softly in my ear and runs his fingers over my arm, slowly up and down.

"What you think I'm joking? Because I'm so serious right now." I continue to tease. I hadn't expected that making up would be so…so inconceivably wonderful. I was literally floating on happiness right now.

"We don't have to fight to do this you know." He says as I feel his lips press gently to the top of my head. I can still hear the laughter in his voice and I know he loves this every bit as much as I do.

"Was it always like this?"

"What do you mean exactly?" He asks laughing out loud again.

"This perfectly wonderful. Being together. The two of us."

"Always. Everything with you has been that way. Even when other things we were dealing with were bad or stressful, everything with you has always been so perfect."

I sigh happily at his words and close my eyes. I try to imagine what we were like back in 12. I hate that I can't remember but I'm so glad that he patiently waited while I my heart found his all over again. It was like it was meant to be, the two of us, falling in love.

"Hey, how's Katniss feeling? I didn't ask you." I ask him, realizing.

"She's not super happy about being layed up in bed. And she's down for 6-8 weeks, maybe longer. And she won't be helping on any missions anytime soon."

"Oh that's awful! 6-8 weeks? It must have been pretty bad."

"Yeah, she's pretty lucky to have made it back to the hovercraft like that."

"What was it like? Was it scary being out there?" I ask. We never really talked about his mission after he'd returned.

"Yes and no. It was really good to be outside and breathe in fresh air and smell the outdoors, the trees and dirt, you know? But knowing what we were doing, how dangerous it would be if we got caught, that was more than a little bit scary."

"Did you have any problems, like Katniss did?"

"Sort of. I was assigned to town runs at first since I was more familiar with the woods in that area. Because of that, I had smaller groups to work with than she did. That was a good thing, it made it easier to keep everyone together as a group. The hard part was that they were all from town and not really understanding the urgency of the mission. It was hard to get them to move as swiftly as I needed them too. But I still managed to get two groups of town people back to the craft."

"Only two groups from town?"

"Yeah, not enough people there who they were able to get to me. Seam was going nuts so they sent me there for the final run. It was a madhouse. People everywhere, trying to escape, trying to get through the fence. I managed to get one good, fast moving group from there before we came back here. It was close though. Too close for comfort."

"What do you mean close? Like they would just abandon you out there?" I ask in horror as I sit up.

"Well, not abandon but they would have to leave without me if need be. Our time span for the rescue was tight and if I'd been much slower at all, they wouldn't have been able to wait for me. I would have had to stay out there until they could manage to come for me again when it was safer."

"And when would that have been?"

"Who knows? Maybe a couple hours. Maybe days. It depended on the Capitol really. How long it would be before we could slip past them."

"Gale, I had no idea that they might have to leave you out there!" I tell him as horrible thoughts fill my mind as I picture what could have happened.

He sits up too, hugging me to him and kissing my forehead. "It's fine. I'm here and I'm just fine. No need to let yourself get all worked up over what could have happened."

I'm quiet in his arms for a moment before I ask my next question. "Do you think you'll have to help on anymore missions? Now that Katniss is injured, I mean?"

"I don't have to do anything. If you aren't comfortable with me doing missions, I won't do them. But nobody's asked me to help out on anymore anyways. I only got asked this time because I knew the woods outside of 12 so well. I'm sure I'll be back washing dishes tomorrow."

"I am glad that you were able to save so many people. I hate thinking about 12 being destroyed."

"I know. I'm thankful for those we were able to rescue but we left so many behind." He says quietly and I hear him take a deep breath in. I can tell he's remembering being there and having to run away with helpless people still behind.

"You can only do so much. You're just one person."

"I know that. I just…I wish things could be different. Wish that Snow wasn't in charge. Like if all of Panem could be free? No games, no Capitol, no Snow? It would be so much better I think."

"Gale, what do you think is happening to my father? I know you said the videos weren't really him speaking to me but rather President Snow sending me a message through him. Do you think they're hurting him Gale?"

"I think anyone in a Capitol prison is in bad shape. I don't think it's good for any of them."

"But specifically about my father, do you think my disappearance is making it worse for him?"

"Madge, if there was anything at all I could do, I would. I really would. But you have to just try and remind yourself that your father knows you're safe. He's happy that you escaped, that they can't get their hands on you ever again. Try to think about that instead of the rest of it." He tells me softly, obviously avoiding giving me a direct answer to my question. In a way, it's still an answer though. It means that yes, in fact things are worse for my father because I vanished from the arena. That he's being tortured because of my absence.

"I wonder about my mother and about Mabel. If anything's happened to them? And what about Peeta's family? It's so terrible not knowing if they're all okay."

"They probably aren't bothering your mother. She was so sick it wouldn't do them much good, you know? And as for Mabel, well, all I can say is she's a lot tougher than she looks. She's Seam and Seam people are tough. As for the Mellarks, I don't know."

"Did they tell you how they would do it? How the Capitol planned to destroy 12?"

"No, and I didn't ask. It's easier not to think too much about the things you can't help. The things you can't change."

"Yeah, I could see how it would be."

We lay quiet in each others arms for awhile, both lost in thought about 12 and the Capitol and the misery of everything.

"We're two really lucky people, you know that?" He says to me.

"The luckiest." I agree. And I mean it. We're the luckiest people I know. We have each other and we're safe in 13 where the Capitol can never hurt us again. Lucky is barely good enough to describe it really. But in the back of my mind, it's hard not to notice the guilt I feel for all of it. The guilt that will probably always linger for everyone not so lucky as we were.

(Gale POV)

I'm in the back of the kitchen, just getting started on the dishes when my supervisor comes in and stops me.

"Hawthorne, you've been reassigned. You can take this slip down to the Defense Department."

"Right now?" I ask as I take the slip of paper from her hands. I'm glad to not be washing dishes but I wasn't expecting to be reassigned to Defense.

"Yes. They're expecting you." She says as she steps in to take my place at the sink.

I head on downstairs to Defense and find Haymitch waiting for me at the front desk. He waves me back to follow him and in his office we sit down. I don't have to get temporary clearance to come back or anything like I usually do.

"So what's going on? Why am I working down here now?"

"Well Kiddo, it's like this, Katniss is outta commission and without her, my team is down a person. She suggested I bring you on board and in truth I'd rather work with you than some nitwit they might rustle up for me here otherwise."

"Is it temporary? Until Katniss comes back?"

"Nah, it'll likely be permanent. Why? That gonna be a problem for you?"

"I uh, I just need to talk this all over with Madge. I don't know how she'll feel about all this. Would I have to leave and go on missions?"

"So the princess wears the pants, huh?" He chuckles.

"If that's the way you wanna call it, fine. Doesn't insult me one bit. She's pretty much my everything and I won't leave her behind again if she doesn't want me to." I shrug, not letting him get to me. And I mean every word of it. I'll flat out refuse if they tell me to go on a mission and Madge doesn't want me to go. Just won't do it.

He shakes his head and sighs. "Fine, fine. Get her approval if that's what you have to do. And yes, there may be missions. It's just part of it."

"I can talk to her tonight and I'll let you know tomorrow. These missions, are they always rescue ones? Is that what I'd always be doing?"

"They vary. Some are rescue, though not typically of the size of the one you just worked. Some are just delivering and collecting messages with our undercover people. Your face is recognizable thanks to Snow and all his viewings and searching for all of us. That'll probably keep you stuck here a lot of the time. Won't use you unless we have too."

"Okay, I'll talk to her and let you know. Anything else for now?"

"Nope. No need in getting into it unless you're actually gonna do the work. Come see me tomorrow at 9. We'll see where we're going from there."

"Okay, thanks." I tell him as I get up and head out of the Defense Department. I decide to go see Katniss again before I talk to Madge. I'm hoping she'll be willing to shed a little more light on what all it is that I'll actually be doing. Maybe tell me some of the missions that she's worked on. When I talk this all over with Madge later, I want to be able to give her as much information as possible.

I find a very bored Katniss, still laying in bed with her leg up in traction.

"Oh thank God. I've been seriously about to die of boredom."

I laugh a little. "That much fun, huh?"

"I'm stuck in bed in a room by myself nonstop. What do you think?"

"Nobody else come to visit?"

"Yeah, Peeta's been here but he's at work right now. Prim's at school and my mother is working."

"Speaking of work, I just found out that I was transferred to Defense."

"You're welcome." She says with a smile.

"Yeah, about that…" I start off.

"Don't tell me you'd rather be washing dishes?" She asks with disbelief on her face.

"Maybe. It's just with Madge, things are different for me now. I don't know how comfortable she'll be with me going out on missions. She had a hard time when I was gone the other day."

"It's a good job Gale. You'd finally be getting to do the things we always wished we could do. You're going to be a part of the team that fights against the Capitol and all that they stand for. This is what we used to dream about, you know?"

"Key word being used too. Look, I'm all for being opposed to the Capitol. But I won't risk anything with Madge. I know what it feels like to think I'm going to lose her and I don't want her to ever have to feel that about me. I'm gonna talk it all over with her tonight and give Haymitch a final decision tomorrow morning. I came here to you hoping you might be willing to give me some insider perspective on what I'll really be doing."

"Shut the door. I'll tell you enough so you can make an informed decision." She tells me with a sigh.

I do as she says, shutting the door so we can speak without being overheard. Missions are always considered classified and she's supposed to be limited as to what she can say.

"So you want to know what the missions are like, right?"

"Yeah. What kind of stuff will I be doing?"

"Well, if you're here in 13 it's usually research and prep type work. Gathering background information and stuff before missions. It's a lot of reading and watching videos and stuff like that."

"And if I'm not in 13?"

"Not all missions are like what we just did. That was a huge one. I've been out on a couple. They aren't all that big a deal."

"C'mon Catnip. I need real details here." I tell her. I don't want the same vague crap that I already know.

She hesitates. Thinking to herself. I'm not sure if it's because she doesn't want to break confidentiality or if she doesn't really want me to know what it's like. I wait though, not pushing her to hurry.

"Gale, I'll tell you this and it's all I can say. You'll be a part of missions and you will have to leave 13 periodically. Sometimes it'll be for a few hours, sometimes a few days. It varies each time. Sometimes you'll be rescuing people and sometimes you might be just a messenger or transferring information. Anytime you have to leave 13, it'll be somewhat dangerous though sometimes more so than others. And more often than not, you won't be able to let anyone know where it is exactly that you're going. A lot of what happens in Defense is secret. I don't think it's anything you wouldn't be able to handle though. And I think you'd like it if you just gave it a shot."

"If Madge wasn't a factor, I would be down in defense right now, rearing to go. But life is a whole different thing when you're married. It isn't just about me anymore. I won't do anything without talking to her first and only then if she's okay with it. Thanks for telling me what you could."

"Come back and see me tomorrow after you talk to Haymitch?" She asks sounding glum. I think she's pretty disappointed that I'm not sure I want to transfer to Defense. Back before her games happened, both she and I would have jumped at the chance to do this. But what she can't seem to understand, what I was trying to explain, is that things are different now. I'm different now. And even if that disappoints her, I still feel like it was all a change for the better. Being with Madge makes me a better person.

"Yeah, I'll see ya tomorrow."

I head upstairs, unsure of how to really go about talking this over with Madge. Just yesterday we were talking about how she didn't like me being gone. I'd held her in my arms and told her how I wasn't planning on leaving. How I would be staying right here with her. I had no idea this was going to be offered to me. There's a part of me that is just itching to get out there and be a part of anything that works against the Capitol. But the other part of me, it never wants to be away from Madge again. Because, what if the worst happens and I get captured? What if I get hurt? What if I can't get back to her? I'd never forgive myself for what it would do to Madge. We've been through far too much already for me to go taunting fate with opportunities for more problems to arise.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

(Madge POV)

I'm lost in a memory assignment when Gale comes home, surprising me by being early. I push my work to the floor and smile at him.

"Hey, what are you doing here? Not that I'm complaining." I say as I reach up to kiss him.

"Would you believe it if I said I skipped out of work cause I missed you already?"

"I like it, but what's really going on?"

He sighs and plops down on the bed facing me. "Gotta talk something over with you."

A knot instantly forms in the pit of my stomach. No conversation ever brings good news when it starts out like that. "Okay. So talk, I'm listening." I say, trying to ignore the pit and be optimistic.

He takes my hands in his and his eyes shine with nervousness. I was right. This won't be a fun talk. "I received a work reassignment today. Got transferred to the Defense Department."

My stomach knots up even more. Defense Department. That means more missions. "How'd that happen?"

"Katniss recommended it. I'd be on on Haymitch's team, filling in for her while she recovers but even after she comes back on full duty, I'd have to stay there."

"Oh." I say trying desperately to hide my disappointment. I don't want him on the team that goes out on missions. I want him here. With me. But is it fair for me to feel that way?

"But hey, before you go getting upset, you should know that I didn't accept the transfer yet. I talked it over with Haymitch and then again with Katniss and I told them I couldn't agree to anything until you and I discussed it."

"I'm not upset." I say trying a little to hard to sound normal and making my voice sound high pitched.

"It's okay if you don't want me to do it. There's a big part of me that would rather stay here with you anyway."

"And the rest of you? It wants to go out on missions and fight against the Capitol?"

"Yeah. It does. But like I told them, I won't go anywhere without you saying it's okay."

"Don't do that Gale. Please don't put this decision all on me."

"Not on you, on us. But your feelings matter a lot. What do you think? And be honest."

"That feeling I had when you were gone last time, it was horrible. It was as if the minute you left, I just felt so empty. I would hate to feel that all over again. But I also know that you could be very valuable to the Defense Department, definitely more valuable than washing dishes."

"You should know, that sometimes I wouldn't be able to tell you where it was I was going or what the reason was. And Haymitch says that because my face is recognizable that they'd likely only send me out of 13 if need be. That I'd be here the rest of the time. But the possibility that I'd leave would always be there."

"Is it terrible that I don't want you to go? I know it's selfish of me." I ask as I look down at the blanket. I feel tears coming on and I really don't want want to cry about this. Stupid lack of control over my emotions.

"I can't say I don't feel the same. I want to be here with you. All the time. Not off trying to help the rest of Panem. It isn't easy for me to be away from you either."

"So we're both selfish then?" I joke a little. He gives me a smile and reaches up to wipe away one tiny tear that slips down my cheek.

"Who can blame us, I mean, we are pretty amazing together." He jokes back.

"But I also know that without brave rescue teams, neither of us would be here right now. We might not even be together. I might be dead were it not for someone being willing to be part of a mission to save me."

He sighs again and pulls me to him, pressing his forehead against mine. "I know."

"Do you think we could get Haymitch to bend some rules?"

"What do you mean? What rules?"

"Like if you were out on a mission, do you think I could know where you were or when you might be back? Or maybe someone in defense could keep in contact with me a little on the longer missions, just so I know everythings alright?"

"Maybe. Be worth asking anyway. Wanna come with me to talk to him in the morning? I'm meeting him at 9."

"Maybe. It depends. If we haven't come to a decision by tomorrow morning, then yes, I will. Let's just sort of think this all over tonight and we can decide tomorrow before you go to see him."

"Okay. That sounds fair to me."

"What did Katniss say about it? Was she able to say anything about it?"

"Not much. She did seem pretty surprised that I wasn't jumping at it right away. Like she was having a hard time seeing why I needed to talk it over with you first."

"Oh. I do appreciate it though. I mean, you talking to me about it first."

"I'd never do it any other way. Katniss just has a hard time understanding that because she still sees me as the same person she left behind when she went into her games. Old me would've been fighting like crazy to be switched over to the Defense Department."

"Do you miss it being like that? Your life, I mean? How it was before?"

"Never. Not once. Before you, everything was just about surviving. Stay alive, keep my family alive. Being with you makes it better. I'm actually living now. There's a purpose. As cheesy as all that may sound."

"It's not cheesy. I think that must be how love is. Although I'm not sure any of us will ever really get to live."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that being hidden away underground isn't truly living. And the rest of Panem isn't really living either with the lack of freedom and with the games always hanging over their heads. As long as Panem stays the way it is, with Snow ruling over everything, no one is really getting to live. Not truly anyway."

"Yeah. I know. But it is better here in 13 than it was for us in 12. At least here, no one's trying to put you in the games. And here, we have the essentials. Food, shelter. Each other. It's not perfect being stuck down here but it's a good when you compare it to the alternative."

"I guess so. I'm thankful we're able to be here but it isn't what I would have pictured my life being like."

"What'd you picture?"

"Before you? It wasn't like I pictured anyone or anything specific, I just sort of dreamed I'd have a family and a house. Figured my children would have grandparents to visit and a yard to play in. Just little stuff like that." And then I add "I don't mean to sound ungrateful for what I do have though because I am very, very grateful."

"I don't think you sound ungrateful at all. Those are all perfectly normal things to wish you could have or to see yourself having one day."

"Gale? Did we want a family? I know we got married very early and all but did we ever talk about having children in the future?"

He grins ear to ear and I think I blush a little. "We talked a little about it. Not until right before you left though."

"Well did we want them or not?"

"Oh yeah. A house full of them!" He announces, still grinning.

"Just how big is this house we're filling?" I tease with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, it's massive. We're talking a giant, mansion sized house." He teases as he gestures to the size with his arms.

I reach back and grab a pillow off the bed and hit him with it. He laughs and falls to the side trying to duck out of my way.

"How do you feel about it? Do you want us to have kids one day?" He asks me.

"I don't know. Haven't thought about before now."

"And now?"

"Maybe one day. I'm not sure how good I'd be at it. I'd like to be though. A good mother."

He, still lying on his side on the bed, reaches over and wraps his arms around me, pulling me down to him. "You'll be a wonderful mother. I see how good you are with Posy. And it's always been like that. I've watched you with her as long as we've been together and it's so effortless for you, the way you're able to care for her. I don't doubt for one minute your ability to be a wonderful mother whenever that time comes."

"I hope so. You'll be a great father. You practically already are to Rory, Vick and Posy anyway."

"Yep. One day, one day. We're gonna have that house full one day. Just you wait and see." He says pulling my face to his and lightly kissing the tip of my nose, then my lips.

We lay in comfortable silence for awhile. I think we're both imagining us as parents. I do want to have children with him. One day. Far from now. We are still so very young and I'm just getting accustomed to being married and I still don't have my memory back. It's not the right time for a family right now. Yes, one day I hope to have that house full of children with Gale but for now, I think I'll just enjoy being his wife. And oh how much I do enjoy that. So very much.

(Gale POV)

I'm sound asleep when she wakes me up, shaking me and whispering my name. "Gale, Gale, wake up."

"What's wrong?" I ask going on alert.

"Nothing's wrong. I just have to talk to you for a minute."

"What's up?" I ask as I sit up and reach over to turn up the lights a bit.

"I think you need to do it. I think you should transfer to the Defense Department."

"What makes you so sure? Have you been up thinking about this all night?" I ask her, curious where her mind is at. Wondering what it is that made the choice suddenly clear for her. And hoping she's slept at least a little bit.

"I just think it's what you should be doing. It's what you would've done if I wasn't in the picture. And it's what you'll be best at. It'd be a waste for you not to do this."

"But are you sure? I won't be upset if you want me to stay here instead. I'd be happy to stay a dish washer forever if that made you happy, if that gave you a sense of security." I can't believe she's okay with this. We'd talked about it and she'd been hesitant at best. The more I thought about it this afternoon though, the more I felt like I wanted to do it. I wanted to be a part of what worked to save people from the Capitol's evilness. But I hadn't shared that with her too much. I really did want this to be her decision. And I really was prepared to go into Haymitch's office tomorrow and turn him down.

"I'm sure. I trust Haymitch and if he's leading your team and calling shots, I trust him. He may be a little different than most but he isn't stupid. And I trust you. I know you'll act with caution, with your safety in mind, even when that's a difficult thing given the situations you'll likely encounter. I want you to do this, if that's what you want for yourself. I do."

I'm quiet for a moment taking in what she's saying. Her face reads nothing short of sincerity. She's having a little faith in me and letting me do this. If that's what I want. It's as loving a gesture as I could ever ask for.

"Okay. I'm gonna do it then." I whisper taking a deep breath in. My eyes are locked on hers, searching for any hint of disappointment but instead, all I see is her fighting spirit. She's glad I'm going to do this. I see it all over her face. I lean forward, kiss her softly, whispering "I love you." against her lips.

"I love you too. Now get some sleep, you've got a big day tomorrow. Can't have you falling asleep on the job on your first day." She says as she takes her finger and pokes my forehead with it, pushing me back to lie down again. I do and she snuggles up against me after turning down the lights again.

When I wake up the next morning, she's already up. I hear the shower running so she must be in there. I get up and make the bed so she won't have to do it later. As I wait for her to finish up in there, I spot her memory work assignment on the floor next to the bed. I reach down to pick it up and lay it out in front of me on the bed so I can see what it is. They've been routinely giving her the most random things as assignments. Pictures for her to look at, lists of words, things I don't even understand. And none of it seems to be worth a crap as far as helping her regain any memories in my opinion. This assignment looks to be just more of the same. A series of flash cards with writing on them. I'm about to put them back on the floor when I realize it's Madge's handwriting. On one side of the card there's a word or a name and on the other, she's writing phrases and words. I think it's things she must remember or something.

I flip through the cards and find one with my name on it. I glance back at the bathroom door and can still hear her in there so I figure I have a minute to read my card. I feel a little sneaky and wrong for doing this but at the same time, she did leave it out where I could easily see it anyway so I figure it isn't really a secret or anything. And I'd kinda like to read it without asking her just because it's like getting to see what she really thinks. What she really remembers.

I turn over the card and begin to read the elegant script scrawled on the back. Mostly it's just words.

_ Katniss's friend, hunter, daring, fan club, girlfriends, family provider, angry, quiet, despises me, rebellious, Seam, handsome_

That's what she remembers? That's it? My heart slumps a bit and I think back to before Katniss left for the games. The things she remembers aren't wrong. I was all of those things. But the part that really stabs at me is how much it hurts that she can't remember the things about me that changed once we were together. How I realized it was impossible to despise her because I realized I'd never known her, the real her. How I'd stopped having multiple girlfriends and ignored my so called fan club and had eyes only for her. How I stopped being so angry and found myself with a smile plastered across my face, giddy with love. As happy as I am to have her back, loving me once again, I hate that she can't remember what we had back in 12. She deserves to have those memories.

I flip to another card and see it labeled _My Father_ on the front. On the back it says this.

_ Mayor of 12. Respectable. Overworked. Tired. Busy. Concerned. Important._

The next card says _Myself_ on the front and on the back it reads these words.

_ Daughter of the Mayor, pretty, poised, example setter, friendly but friendless, lonely, insignificant._

Oh my God. Is this how she thinks she used to be? Is that how she remembers herself? Lonely and insignificant? That's terrible. She was more than that. She may have been lonely at one point but why can't she remember the time after that when she was anything but lonely? When she was so loved that those around her, those closest to her, would do anything to help her? Her mother, her father, Tripp and myself. We all love her and we all made decisions based on our love for her. And Insignificant? She's anything but that!

I'd give anything to get all her memories back for her. Anything. There's more cards here, lots more and I wish I could go through all of them but I don't have time. I pick up the pencil from the floor and scribble a few words of my own on her card and on mine. If she looks at these cards again, I want her to see what I see when I remember us.

_**A/N: Thanks so much for all the reviews! You guys are so awesome! **_


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21**

(Madge POV)

I reach up, standing on my tip toes to kiss his lips. "Have a good day, I'll see you tonight. Date night, don't forget!"

"Love you." He says, his lips pecking against mine once more before he heads off to his first day working in the Defense Department.

"It's good to see you two happy like this." I hear from behind me.

I spin around and find Tripp. My heart clenches a bit. Ever since he confessed his love to me and that whole jealousy incident with Gale, I've had a hard time being around him. I still carry a lot of guilt when it comes to him.

"Hey, how's it going?" I ask, trying to sound cheerful and casual.

"I'm good. I mean what I said though, about my being happy for you two."

"Thanks." I tell him, full of awkwardness.

He senses it and shakes his head with a subtle laugh. "No, sorry, I don't mean that in a weird way. What I mean is, it's good to see you looking like your old self again. Looking like the pieces of your life have fallen back into place."

"Oh, well, I can't argue with that. It does feel good to be on the road to normalcy again."

"What are you up too right now? They just changed my shifts at work and I've got a bunch of time to kill. Want to do something?"

"Um, I would, but I kind of have a memory project I have to finish up before my appointment with my therapist." I tell him. And I'm not exactly lying to him. I do have to finish what I was working on yesterday afternoon when Gale came home. But the partial truth I'm not telling him is that I really don't want too because I don't know how to act around him anymore.

"Oh, okay. Next time maybe. How's it going with the memory stuff by the way?"

"Still no memories. Not even a flicker of one." I sigh.

"Well, keep at it. It'll come back sometime I'm sure. Anyway, guess I'll go see what other troubles I can get myself into. See you around." He tells me as he waves and heads off in the opposite direction of me. I watch him go wishing it could be somewhat different between us. Not in a romantic way of course, no, not that. I just wish there were a way to be friends with him and not feel like I'm taking advantage of his heart, of his feelings for me. He's already done far too much for me in one lifetime.

I head back to my room, wanting to wrap up the assignment I'd tossed aside yesterday. I'm almost finished with my memory assignments. Ren says that soon, I'll just do periodic check ups with my team of doctors instead of the regular ones I've been doing. As much as I'm thrilled to be finished with all the Medical Center appointments I do think I'll miss all the assignments. At first, I hated them. I thought they were stupid and I definitely don't think that they're working to help me regain any memories, but I've grown to enjoy them as thought provoking activities. Like the assignment I'm about to finish up now. They gave me a stack of cards and wrote names and places on one side of the card and I'm supposed to flip it over and write down the first things that come to mind when I read that name.

Some cards are easier than others for me to fill up. Like the one that said School on the front. That one was easy. I was a good student. Good grades. Near perfect attendance. Never a troublemaker. Not my favorite place to be. That was an easy card to fill out. It was the cards with names that I found to be more difficult. The problem is that since my injury, I've learned quite a bit about things that have happened but that doesn't make them memories. This assignment is focused only on what I can truly recall about a place or person, not about knowledge I've since gained on the topic. That makes it harder. Like the card for my father.

I'd quickly written the words, _Respectable. Overworked. Tired. Busy. Concerned. Important._ These were the words that came to mind when I thought about how I remembered him. It was difficult however to ignore the words that come to mind out of information I've gained recently rather than out of memory. _Prisoner. Liar. Horrible._ These are words I would want to add to what I actually wrote. My mind wonders if I felt that way before my head injury? According to Gale, I'd become aware of my father's poisoning my mother and becoming a Capitol prisoner long before I left for the games. How did I feel about it back then? Was I angry? Did I forgive him? Pity him? Miss him? It's so difficult to know. My mind, my memory, it just feels like a big empty black hole. And I hate that.

As I flip through the rest of my cards, I notice writing on one of the cards that I don't recognize as mine. It's on my card. Gale must have written it. _Selfless. Giving. Kind. Strong. Adventurous. Brave. Determined. Fierce. Breathtaking. Mesmerizing. Wife._

Tears spring to my eyes as I run my finger over the words he scribbled at the bottom of my card. He sees me so differently than I'm able to see myself sometimes. The girl he knew still feels very foreign to me in a lot of ways. Like his word Adventurous. I don't see myself that way at all. I never once remember being on any sort of adventure. Of course, I do know that I must have been somewhat this way because Gale told me I'd gone to woods with him. That I'd lived it out there. I'd even learned to swim! But I can't remember that version of me. No matter how hard I try, I just can't remember myself.

I wipe away the tears and hurriedly flip through the rest of the cards to see if there are any others that Gale may have written on. When I see his card, I smile and feel the tears well up again. Here he has written the words, _Love. Husband. Soul Mate._

It's true. He is all of those things. He is my husband who I love so incredibly much, and if there is such a thing as a soul mate, I'd bet on my life that he was mine. After all, hadn't I fallen hopelessly in love with this man twice now? Yep, he'd have to be my soul mate. There's no other possible explanation.

I wonder if he did this while I was in the shower this morning? Why wouldn't he have just told me about it? I guess that's just his way though. Little loving surprises here and there. He knew I'd read this today and see what he'd added. He'd filled in the parts I couldn't. The missing pieces of my mind. I want to do something special for him too. Something to let him know that I care just as much about him as he does about me. But what? I don't have time to think about it right now though. Right now, I need to finish this assignment and get to my appointment.

I scribble down quick answers on my few remaining cards and hurry down to my appointment with Ren. After I'd been late that one time, I've made a very conscious effort not to do it again. Not that it was a big deal with Ren that day but I still felt bad about it.

"So how did it go with the assignment?" Ren asks once I'm settled into my chair across from him.

"Good I guess. Still no memory or anything worthwhile but it was thought provoking if nothing else."

"It's all worthwhile, even if it seems otherwise. Remember that." He says. "In all of life, it's all worthwhile."

There seems to be some sort of hidden wisdom behind his words. It's a feeling I often get when I talk to him. Like he must have been through quite a bit in his life. We never go into discussion about it though. All our conversations revolve around me and my life. And I suppose that's how it should be in a therapist/patient relationship.

"Gale wrote on two of the cards too. I didn't know it until this morning. He must have seen that I was working on this and decided to add in his own thoughts." I say holding out the two cards that Gale wrote on.

Ren takes them and reads over them. He looks back up to me and smiles. "You seem to be making a lot of progress as a couple. How do you feel about him having looked at your work and about what he wrote?"

"I don't mind that he looked at it. It wasn't a secret or anything. As for what I think about his additions, well, all I can say is that I wish that I was able to remember the things that he remembers. We may be making progress and doing fine now but it's like we each have different starting points for our relationship."

"Does that matter to you?"

"Sometimes. I feel as if I'm behind him in a way. Like until I regain my memory, I think I'll always feel as if I need to catch up to where he's at. Does that make any sense? It's kind of hard to explain."

"I think I see what you're trying to tell me. Perhaps it's not as important as you think though? Perhaps, you should try and focus only on the here and the now of your relationship and not on catching up to him. It's not a race."

"I can try." I say with a sigh. "Ren, do you honestly think I'll ever get my memory back? I would have thought something, even a small memory would have come back by now."

"The human brain is a very complex thing. Memory loss isn't a cookie cutter type of problem so there unfortunately isn't a clear yes or no answer to your question. The best I can say is that you have the potential to regain anything you once had. Nothing was irreparably damaged in your injury."

"I may not have my memory but I'm pretty positive this is one of the most frustrating experiences of my life." I say.

He chuckles. "Probably so my dear, probably so."

"Well, what's next? Where do we go from here?"

"I wanted to ask how you were feeling about Gale's transfer to Defense. Are you comfortable with this transfer?"

"I wasn't initially but the more and more I thought about it, the more I felt he just needed to do it. When I think back to the Gale Hawthorne that I remember, he wasn't the type to waste away washing dirty dishes. He was so much more than that. He was a fighter. A tough guy. A rebel. Being married to me shouldn't change that about him. I appreciate that he respected me enough to let me have a say in the matter but I think today is the first day that he'll really be working where he's needed."

"And how will you feel about him going away?"

"I can't think about that now. I'll worry about it when the time comes. He needs me to be supportive of him, whatever he's doing and I plan to do my best to make that happen."

"You know something Mrs. Hawthorne? You are one very smart young lady."

"Thank you." My heart flutters a little at the sound of my name. I still love hearing my name as Mrs. Hawthorne rather than Undersee.

"And this wraps up our session. I'd like to see you again in about a month, just to check in and see how you're doing. But if you feel like you need a session with me before that, just stop by and schedule one."

"Thank you, I will. And I want you know I've really appreciated our talks."

"That's what I'm here for. Anytime." He says with a smile as he stands to shake my hand.

As I head back home, I realize I should go visit with Katniss. Gale said she was getting a little stir crazy so it may be nice of me to stop in and see her. I find out what room she's in and stop by. Her door is closed but there's a window on it so I peek through before knocking. I don't want to wake her if she's resting. I see Peeta, resting his head on her bed. She is in fact asleep so I'm glad I didn't knock. I can't imagine it's easy to sleep with your leg all tied up in that contraption thing. I watch through the window for a minute. Peeta's eyes are closed but he isn't asleep. His hand is moving. Fingers running up and down Katniss's uninjured leg. It's easy to see how much he cares about her. I'm glad she has somebody loving her in the way that I have Gale. Everybody deserves to have someone care about them in the way that Gale cares about me.

(Gale POV)

If I'd thought it was annoying going through the process of getting temporary clearance into the Defense Department, it's twice as awful to get permanent clearance. A lot of paperwork and boring stuff. Haymitch had been glad I'd said yes but didn't seem surprised by my decision. When I asked him about being able to discuss mission destinations with Madge he'd scoffed at me. Told me "We'll see." And that was that. No further discussion. And all I've been doing since then is paperwork and more paperwork. While he kicks back for a nap, snoring just loudly enough to be annoying. So far, I've gotta say, this sucks.

When I'm finally finished with it, I toss the stack back onto Haymitch's desk. It lands amidst piles of papers and trash with a resounding thud. He startles awake, grumbling.

"You finished?"

"Yeah, finally."

"Alright. Here's your badge. You'll have to wear it at al times down here or anywhere in 13 where you're sent for official business. Don't lose it. If you thought the paperwork to get it was a pain in the ass, you should see the crap you have to fill out to get it replaced."

I make a mental note to never lose it. Ever. I slip the cord around my neck and examine the badge. It has my picture and name on the front and a swipe strip on the back. "What's the swipe strop for?"

"Grants access to any area of 13."

"I can go anywhere I want?"

"Don't go nuts or anything. It's all recorded in our systems every time you swipe it."

"Sure. Ok. So what's my first assignment? What am I working on?" I ask, eager to do something other than paperwork.

"We have a break until after lunch. Then we'll have a departmental meeting. See ya back here after lunch kiddo." He says easing himself back into his chair as if to resume his nap.

"Yeah, okay." I say as I leave. His eyes are already closing.

I wonder if Madge is ready for lunch or if she's still at her appointment. I decide to swing by our place before heading to the cafeteria. I find her sitting cross-legged on our bed. Doing nothing at all.

"Hey beautiful, what are you doing?" I ask smiling at how her cheeks still flush pink when I call her beautiful.

"Just thinking. Are you finished with work already? I thought you'd be there all day."

"Nope. Just got a lunch break. Thought I'd see if you wanted to have lunch with me. You hungry?"

She nods and climbs off the bed. I lean forward and press my lips to her forehead. "You okay?" I ask her. She seems really quiet.

"What? Oh, no, I'm fine. Just lost in thought."

"What about?"

"Just stuff." She shrugs. "How was your first morning? Was it better than doing dishes?"

"Not better than dishes I'm afraid. All I did was paperwork and more paperwork. Then I have a departmental meeting after lunch. Gotta say this hasn't been near as exciting as I thought it would be."

She laughs a little. "I'm sure it'll liven up a bit as you get settled into it all."

"How about you? How was your morning?"

"Good. I saw what you wrote on my cards." She says stealing a quick glance up at me. I can't tell if she's angry about it or not.

"Yeah, um, about that, see I just couldn't help it. I wanted you to see what you were missing. So you could see what I see when I think back to how it was back in 12."

"I didn't mind that you wrote it. It was sweet really."

"You sure? You don't seem very happy about it."

"I am. I liked reading what you thought."

"Then why do you seem so sullen?"

She stops walking and turns to me. "I loved what you wrote and it was a lovely surprise to find it. If I seem sullen it's just that I'm a little sad that I can't remember the things that you can. I just left my appointment with Ren and we talked about it there. I'm fine, I promise. You're just catching me at an off time."

"Don't be sad. It was supposed to make you happy." I tell her, kissing her forehead again and running my hands over her arms. I hate that I made her sad.

"It does. Really. I was watching Peeta and Katniss together earlier and thinking how everyone deserves to have someone love them the way that you love me."

"Well then cheer up already. You're loved and that should make you happy." I say giving her a little nudge. It's been awhile since she seemed this bummed out about her memory loss.

She takes a deep breath. "Gale, just kiss me already and let's go eat lunch."

I do just as she orders, planting a long, sweet kiss on her lips. It's clear that she doesn't want to talk about it anymore. Whatever it is that has her thinking, missing her memories, it isn't something she wants to discuss. And she does seem to have liked what I wrote. Maybe it's just hard for her sometimes. I brush it off, not thinking anymore about it as we walk hand in hand to the cafeteria.

We find a table and sit down to eat. "Hey, look what I get. This card right here, it gets us into any area of 13 that we want." I say holding up my badge for her to see.

"Oh yeah? Well where are you taking us?"

"Where do you wanna go?"

"Hmmm, somewhere top secret. I want to see the good places. The ones they don't show you on those tours." She says leaning forward across the table and lowering her voice. Her whole face lit up with excitement.

"I'll see what I can do about that. See what I can find out." I whisper back with a grin. In my head, I've already got an idea but I won't tell her about it yet. I'll let it be a surprise for later. Maybe for our date tonight. Yes, I think that's exactly what I'll do.

Over the rest of our lunch she seems to cheer up a little and I think that she must have been telling the whole truth when she said I was just catching her at a bad time. She had just finished her session and that was bound to get her thinking and mulling over the lost memories of her past. When I have to go back to work, I take my time kissing her goodbye. Savoring our kiss, running my hands over her back and down to her hips.

"You'd better stop that if you plan on making it back to work on time." She whispers in my ear as my lips travel to her neck. I can feel her heart racing in her chest as she presses herself against me.

"I hate work." I whisper back as my lips nip at her neck once more before I force myself to pull away, knowing she's right.

"I'll see you tonight. And I expect more of that." She whispers as she steps back, a gleam in her blue eyes.

I smile and shake my head. I love how easy it can be to get lost in just one kiss with her. She's so intriguing, so tempting. So perfect. I stare at her until she finally gives me a light shove towards the door.

Out in the hall, I run my hands over my face. Time to switch my focus back to work now. I head back down and get to the meeting room just as the meeting is beginning. Madge was right, I would've been late if I'd stayed much longer. Haymitch shoves an agenda in front of me and doesn't spare me the look that tells me I was close to screwing up right off the bat.

Most of the meeting is just each team going over the general details and new business of projects they're currently working on. It seems each district has a team leader who has a team working under them. Most of what they discuss doesn't interest me much partially because I don't know much about other districts and partially because I don't know enough about what it is they're working on for it to make sense to me. When they come around to Haymitch though, my attention peaks.

"We're awaiting word on the condition of 12 before determining what our next step will be. I'm expecting to receive some communications sometime tomorrow. I'll update everyone at the next meeting with what our game plan will be." Haymitch says. Everyone in the room nods, seeming to understand what he's talking about. I don't though. Not fully.

When the meeting ends and we're back in his office, I take the opportunity to ask him about it. "What's up with 12?"

"We're waiting to see how they fared after the Capitol's destruction efforts. The mayor, his family and the Peacekeepers were all evacuated just prior to the destruction. We need to find out just how destroyed it really is."

"What'd they do to it?"

"Bombings. Waves of them."

"What then? What happens when we find out how it is there?"

"Well, if it seems that people could possibly still be there or if there could be people that managed to escape into the woods, then we'll try to go back and get them. If not, then we'll leave 12 alone and focus on what Snow's next move is."

"Snow's next move?"

"Yeah kiddo, his next move. You don't think he's finished yet do you?"

"Finished what?"

Searching for your wife for starters. Other tributes and victors as well. He was made a fool on national television. He won't be letting it roll off his back like nothing happened. He's seeking vengeance."

I nod, unable to really find words at the moment. I never thought about it this way before. He's dead right too. Snow won't just roll over for us. He will keep tossing up all of Panem in search of Madge and the rest of us. My mind wanders too about what Haymitch said about 12. Would there be a chance that anyone's been able to survive? Would there be another rescue mission in search of survivors? And if 12 isn't in need of another rescue, if it really was demolished, does that mean we go after Snow next? My mind is so flooded with questions but I know I can't ask them right now. Not sure Haymitch would even have answers for me yet.

I head over to see Katniss before I go up to get Madge for dinner and our date. I'd promised to come by and see her to let her know what my final decision to Haymitch would be. Her door is open so I poke my head in.

"Hey! How's it going?"

"Gale, thank God you're here. I'm about to lose my mind."

I laugh at her dramatics and pull up a chair next to her bed. "So I took the transfer." I tell her.

She rolls her eyes. "So Madge gave you permission, huh?"

"Why do you have to be like that Catnip? Huh? Madge is your friend. And I am too." I ask with a little annoyance in my voice.

She sighs. "Don't go getting all worked up over it. It's just weird to me sometimes how you two are a couple and seeing the way you function together."

"So how's Peeta? You two becoming a real couple yet?" I ask just to get a jab in.

"Shut up Gale. You wouldn't understand how it is with Peeta and I."

"And you can't understand how things are with Madge and I so stop judging."

"Did you come here just to argue with me? Because I can do that with the nurses."

"Actually no. I came because I said I would. Because I thought you'd be happy to hear I took the transfer. The arguing was all your fault with the snarky commentary about me and Madge."

She sighs. "Truce?"

I nod. "When do you get out of here anyway? You won't be here all 6-8 weeks will you?"

"Not sure. Earlier today they said something didn't look right on my blood work. An infection setting in possibly. If it is, then I'll be here a little longer while they deal with that. The meds they keep giving me are knocking me out. I slept solid all morning and I still feel exhausted and crappy."

"Well, I'll stop by again tomorrow and check on you."

"You're leaving already?" She pouts.

"Sorry, got go meet up with Madge. It's date night." I say unable to hide my grin. I love date night.

"Date night? You guys are still doing that?"

"Yep. Went so good on the first one and all that I insisted we make a regular thing. That Peeta of yours, he has good ideas, gotta give him credit for that."

She just gives me a look and shakes her head as I leave. I don't know why she's so anti-love, anti-relationship. Back before her games I always thought she never dated or showed interest in guys because she was so focused on caring for and feeding her family. But now that we're here in 13 and that isn't an issue, I can't figure her out. I can tell she cares for Peeta but she just doesn't seem to be able to let him in all the way. She's still so guarded. And she really needs to loosen up a bit. She really does. Maybe all this laying in bed for the next several weeks will actually do her some good. Maybe she'll be able to finally relax and allow herself to enjoy something for once.

Upstairs, I find an empty unit but there is a note from Madge.

_Gale,_

_I went on ahead to dinner with Rory and Rebekah. See you up there!_

_Love you,_

_Madge_

I smile knowing she's up in the cafeteria right now with my family. It's so much better than how I felt when she was shying away from them at first after her head injury. This feels so much more like my Madge and I love it.

**_A/N: Per a request, the next chapter will be mostly a fluffy date night chapter. Coming soon, hopefully in the next day or so! I love when you guys let me know what it is you want to see more of with this story! Thanks for all your ideas and suggestions and I'll keep doing my best to make them a part of my story!_**


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22**

(Madge POV)

I'm enjoying dinner with Rory and Rebekah and the rest of the Hawthornes so much that I didn't even notice when Gale came into the cafeteria. He just snick up on me, pulling out the chair beside me and looping his arms around my waist and kissing my cheek.

"Hi." I say, blushing a little at his display of affection in front of his family. I glance around the table and notice a sly grin from Rory to Gale. No one else seems to notice though. Rebekah smiles at me across the table. She's rather nice and I'm happy she and Rory have found each other.

"Hey. You ready for our date?"

"As soon as you eat your dinner." I say pushing his food tray towards him. He seems awfully excited for our date but he still needs to eat something before we go. He starts shoveling food into his mouth.

"I swear he used to have table manners Madge. I don't know what happened to them." Hazelle tells me as she shoots Gale a look.

I laugh and elbow him under the table. "Slow down. Our date can wait a few minutes. Just eat your food and try to enjoy your time with your family." I whisper as I lean over to him.

"It's no fair. How come you two always get to go on such cool dates? All we ever get to do is walk around." Rory grumbles.

"Cause I'm important." Gale says smugly as he holds up his badge.

"Yeah, well you two had cool dates even before you worked in Defense." Rory argues.

"Our dates are just fine with me." Rebekah tells him.

"Nah, that's just because you don't know any better. Gale's always taking Madge to cool places."

"Maybe we could all double date sometime." I suggest. Rory lights up but Gale kicks me under the table.

"That'd be awesome! Can we really?" Rory asks Gale.

"We'll see." Gale grumbles through a mouthful of food. I shoot him a look. He needs to be nicer. I think he forgets that he too was once Rory's age and trying to impress girls.

"I wanna go too!" Posy chips into the conversation.

"You're too little." Vick tells her.

"Am not! If Madge says I can come, I can! And she likes when I go places with her! Don't you Madge?"

I fight the urge to laugh and nod my head at the little dark haired cutie with her hands on her hips. "Yes, Posy, I do like your company!"

"Aww, don't bring her along!" Rory now grumbles from across the table. Poor Rebekah just looks helpless, not really knowing what to say.

"Perhaps we can find something to do as a family? With everyone? You too Rebekah." I say trying to appease everyone at the table.

"I think that's a brilliant idea." Hazelle contributes, throwing a thankful smile my way.

"Oh it's just genius." Gale tells everyone sarcastically. "Now, if you'll excuse us, my wife and I have somewhere we need to be right now. Just the two of us." He says standing and pulling my hand for me to join him.

He drags us out of the cafeteria before any further Hawthorne family date talk can continue. Out in the stairwell he pulls me to him, covering my mouth in a deep kiss before pulling back and giving me a look.

"Making plans for Rory to double date with us? And for a family date too?" He asks with a raised eyebrow.

"You don't like your family?" I ask teasingly because I know he's also teasing.

"Love em. I do, really. But I like having you all to myself when date night rolls around. Can't do this if they're all watching us." He says dipping his head for another kiss as he slips his hands around my waist.

"Can't argue with that." I say smiling. "Now, where are you taking me tonight? You sure do seem awful eager to get wherever it is we're going."

"You'd be eager too if you knew what I did."

"Nothing, huh? That's what you're going to give me?"

"Pretty much. Just hush and follow me." He says leading me.

Once we're standing in front of the doors and he swipes us through, I know instantly where we're at. The water reservoir.

"The water reservoir again? That's what you were so excited about?" I ask curiously. And it isn't that I'm not excited to be here again, it's just that I would've expected someplace totally new to us given all his antsiness about getting here.

"Mmhmm. Don't be unimpressed just yet though. This time, it's gonna be a little different. He says leading me into the building and down all the steps to the same landing that we danced on that first date night.

"Okay, you've got me curious. Now what?" I ask looking at him suspiciously.

"Now we swim." He says pulling off his shirt and grinning at me.

My mouth drops open. Swim? I can't swim! I don't know if I remember how! He reaches over and pulls my mouth closed with his fingertips.

"You can do this you know."

"But I'm not sure I'll remember what to do…" I say softly, not any less nervous about it.

He begins to pull my shirt over my head and I robotically begin to slip out of my pants. Can I really do this? Will I remember what my body needs to do once I'm in the water? Will it all come back to me?

"How deep is this water?" I ask, voice trembling.

"Don't know. Maybe 30 feet?" He guesses as he jumps right into it, disappearing beneath the surface for a moment. When he comes back up, he's smiling huge and looking very happy. He swims over to the edge where I'm standing and holds out his hand to me.

"Come on in."

"I….I don't know…" I choke out, still searching for the courage to take this plunge. Literally.

He pauses, staring at me for a minute or two and then says very softly, almost dreamlike, "Do you trust me?"

And those words, that one question, seem to make it all make sense. I do trust him. He won't let anything happen to me. I reach out and take his hand, letting myself fall into the chilly water. In my head I answer him with these words "With my life." And I do.

Once I'm in the water, his arm loops around my waist and I wrap mine around his neck. It's the weirdest feeling being in water where I can't touch the bottom. It's weightless. He watches me for a moment, eyes seemingly lost in a thought before he speaks again.

"You okay?" He asks, still not letting go.

I nod. I am okay I think. I find myself kicking my legs to stay afloat and it feels natural but I don't know how I knew to do this. Maybe he's right. Maybe it is one of those things that just comes right back to you.

"Want a quick refresher lesson?" He offers.

"Okay." I squeak out. He pulls my arms from around his neck and a bit of panic takes over me and I tighten my grip on him.

"Hey, hey, calm down. I won't let go, I promise." He says sensing my fear.

"Sorry." I apologize but don't let my grip go.

He pulls me to him again. His lips dance across my forehead as he whispers again. "Do you trust me?"

This time I answer out loud as I swallow down all my fears and loosen my grip. "With my life." I say it so quietly that I doubt he really even heard me over the sound of the rushing water. And suddenly, his lips crash onto mine, kissing me so passionately and pulling me to him, tightly against his chest.

(Gale POV)

"With my life." Her voice nearly whispers but in my ears it rings loudly. Those are the exact words she spoke the first night at the lake when I was teaching her to swim. I'd asked if she trusted me and those were the words she'd said both that night as well as just now. It stirs such a memory within me that I have to kiss her with all that I have. Every ounce of what I feel for her coming through in one kiss. When I pull back, she's breathless and clinging to me, her face flushed and eyes wide.

"Wow. If this is swimming, I think I like it." She finally says.

"It's not swimming but I like it too."

"What was the reason for that?" She asks me still breathless while I continue to stare at her, unable to look anywhere else.

"I couldn't help it. It was what you said, those words, with my life."

She tilts her head a little to the side and looks at me funny. "Yeah?" She asks still not understanding. I'd be lying if her not making the connection to the memory didn't leave me feeling a little deflated. I'd give anything for her to be able to just once remember how we fell in love the first time around.

"You said the exact same thing to me once before. The very first time I took you swimming at the lake. You were hesitant to get in the water, I asked if you trusted me and you said those words just like you did tonight."

She's quiet for a minute, chewing on her bottom lip, looking off to the side. "I don't remember that." She finally says with a sigh.

I feel bad now that I pointed out yet another thing she can't remember and she seems bummed about it. I swim backward a bit pulling her with me as she unloops her arms from my neck and just holds my arms.

"Didn't mean to make you sad. I'm sorry."

"Don't worry about it. It wasn't you that made me sad. I just hate that I can't remember all the special moments you and I had together in 12."

"Still sorry I brought it up." I tell her again as I continue to pull us around the water.

"It's okay, really. Just drop it?" She says giving me a hopeful look. I nod and decide to lighten the mood by splashing her a little.

"Hey!" She cries out as she splashes me back. I don't think she's noticed yet but we aren't touching anymore. I let go of her when I splashed her and she's treading water just fine on her own. I splash back once more wanting to keep this going, to see if she can keep swimming.

A wave of water hits the back of my head as I try to swim away from her. Her laughter ringing out, echoing in the air. When I turn back to face her, I don't see her anywhere. Panic floods through me and I instantly go under to see if I can see her. I see her and swim, kicking hard to get back to where she is. I shouldn't have swam so far off from her. Not yet. By the time I get to her though, she's resurfaced and I bob up next to her, grabbing hold of her waist.

"I thought you were sinking. Scared the hell outta me for a second there."

"I was swimming. Guess I remember how to do that after all." She says with a grin as she dives under the water again. I smile and dive down after her. She's just as fast now as she was when she left for the games. I love how this skill came back to her.

"I love this!" She says as we come up for air again. "How come we didn't swim the first time you brought me here? This is awesome!"

"I wasn't sure if you would want too. Thought it might be too revealing." I explain as I gesture to our lack of clothing. She blushes.

"Oh. You're probably right. I was so nervous just being on a date with you that I can't imagine how I would've handled having you see me naked."

"You were nervous?" I ask. I of course know that she was a little but I'd love to hear about it, from her point of view. And I love the bashful look she gets on her face when she talks about this.

"Completely. I had no idea how to act on a date and much less a date with you of all people." She says, swimming over to the landing and propping herself up with her arms on the edge of it, legs floating freely behind her.

I swim over and do the same. "Would it make you feel better if you knew I was just as nervous as you were?"

"What'd you have to be nervous about. You remembered what it was like to date me. For me, it was all new."

"But that's part of what made it so scary. I mean, what if you didn't like me this time around? What if you were bored senseless with being around me? What if I tried to kiss you and you got all freaked out about it? I had no idea where you stood and how I should act. Trust me, it was nerve wracking." I admit.

"You thought I didn't want you to kiss me?"

I shrug. "Wasn't sure. All I knew was that it was exactly what I wanted to do. What I was dying to do. But it's one of those things you can't really take back once it's happened. If I made a move too soon, I'd scare you off. It would've crushed me if that'd happened."

"Is it the same?"

"Is what the same?" I ask having no clue what she's asking me.

"Kissing me now. Is it the same as before?"

"I'd say it's better if anything. You see, back then I was thrilled to kiss you. Loved kissing you any chance I got. But now, well, now it's so much more to me. Now I know what it feels like to not be able to kiss you anytime I want. I know what it feels like for you not to want me close to you like that."

"It was so strange waking up and seeing you next to my bed that first day. I couldn't figure out why you were there. And why you would be holding my hand. I thought you were playing some sort of joke on me. A cruel joke." She says thinking back over our time in 13.

"It nearly killed me when you snatched your hand away from me and I realized you didn't remember me at all. Madge, I don't know if I'll ever be able to really explain to you how thankful I am that you managed to fall in love with me all over again. For awhile, for me, there was no greater fear in my life."

"Guess true love really conquers all, huh?" She says sliding closer to me, resting her cheek on my arm.

"Guess so." I lean my face down and kiss her temple. God I love this girl so much. "Ready to get out of here? This water's cold and I don't want you to catch a cold or anything."

She nods and hoists herself back up onto the landing. Once I do the same, I realize I should've brought towels for us. This isn't like being outside in the summertime by the lake. There's no night air to dry off in. And we're soaked.

"Here, use this to dry off some. I didn't think to bring us towels. Sorry." I apologize as I hand her my shirt. She hesitates but takes it after I give her a look that tells her not to argue me on it. I shake off what water I can and then just tug my pants back on. I can dry off back home. When she hands back my shirt, it's dripping wet. I wring it out and slip it on. I'm tempted to go shirtless but I'm not sure if there's a rule about that in 13 or not.

Once we're both dressed we head back up the stairs and out of the water reservoir room. The hallways are nearly empty because it's late but I still turn corners cautiously. I may have clearance to get us into to places like that but technically, Madge needs a temporary pass to come with me and I doubt that swimming's allowed. I know Haymitch said they can see where I swipe my badge at but I don't care. I wanted this date with Madge tonight. Wanted to give her a taste of what our dates were like back in 12. And I don't regret it.

We manage to get back to our room without anyone noticing that we're all wet but Madge's teeth are chattering and I'm still chilly myself. I take her hand and lead us into the bathroom, turning on the shower, letting it heat up as much as it can. When the steam is rising up around us, I peel off Madge's clothes and pull her into the shower, letting the water fall over her.

She closes her eyes as it warms her up and I run my hands over her arms, up and down them until her teeth stop chattering and I no longer feel goosebumps on her arms. Suddenly, her hands tug at my own shirt and I pull it off. I'd been so concerned about her that I hadn't stopped to remove my own clothing. There's a glint in her eyes as we stand there under the shower and then I feel her hands working to unbutton my pants and pushing them off. Watching her, feeling her hands on my body, it drives me crazy. I step closer to her, backing her up against the shower wall and kiss her earlobe, then alongside her jaw. She tilts her head to the side and I move mouth down along her neck and collar bone. The subtle gasp that escapes her sends a thrill right through me and I reach down, picking her up, kissing her mouth as I move us to the bedroom.

I lean backward on the bed, pulling her down with me. She hovers over me and works her way down my neck and over my chest, moving her mouth over my skin. "Madge…" I say, all breathless and needy. My hands tangle in her wet hair and I desperately want more of her, more of this moment.

"I love you." She whispers between kisses as and we lose ourselves in one another.

**_A/N: As I said, this chapter was pure fluff for a reader that requested it. Hope you enjoyed it! For those of you that prefer a little more plot, don't worry, the next few chapters will be more purposeful to the storyline._**


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23**

(Gale POV)

It's been a couple weeks now since I transferred to the Defense Department and I'm enjoying parts of it, others not so much. I most certainly enjoy not having to wash dish after dirty dish. I enjoy knowing some of the behind the scenes stuff that I wouldn't otherwise have knowledge of but I hate all the paperwork. And let me tell you, they have paperwork for absolutely everything. They document practically everything you can think of. And I hate paperwork. I like being able to have breakfast, lunch and dinner with Madge now. Before, I wasn't able to eat dinner with her because I was stuck in the back doing dishes but now I get to eat with her every night.

So far, I haven't been offered a chance to go out on any missions but that's only because there haven't been any. There may be one soon though. After the bombings on 12, our secret connections with the Capitol sent communication letting us know it was possible some people could have survived but that we should hold off on rescue attempts because the area was under heavy surveillance. Guess Snow and his people were waiting and watching to see if the attack on 12 would produce Madge for them. To see if her curiosity over the fate of her home would peak enough to draw her out of hiding. Fat chance on that. No freaking way would I ever let Madge out of 13 right now, maybe not ever. After her being in the games and then Snow posting her picture everywhere, there isn't a soul in Panem who doesn't know what she looks like, who doesn't know that there's a massive reward hanging on her head. Nope, I think I'll prefer to keep her safe and sound here instead.

I stretch out my arms and roll my neck from side to side. I've been staring down at this mess of papers for hours and my body is aching. Katniss had warned me that a big part of Defense was what she called researching. I hadn't realized what she meant was reading. Because everything is on hold while we wait to return to 12, I'm stuck reading over communication logs. Logs of conversations and correspondence to and from the Capitol and 12. Well, 12 when there still was a 12 anyway. Mostly it's just a bunch of boring stuff about coal production, water or electricity usage or stuff like that. And it's all just between the Justice Building, the Mayor, and the Capitol. Nothing else. No personal conversations of town people who were wealthy enough to have also had phones. So far, I haven't seen anything that strikes me as important. And to me, it seems silly to even have me reading this because I'm not even the first person to read it. There are markings and highlighted sections and the pages are wrinkled letting me know that many other people have already read this. I have no idea why they would think I'd be able to notice something that the rest of them didn't. Mostly I just think it's Haymitch's way of giving me busy work so I don't bug him.

A glance up at the clock tells me it's almost time for me to go meet up with Madge for dinner. Madge was assigned a work position finally. They put her in the Processing Center for now but she was told that might change should they decide she'd be more useful elsewhere. And it's very part time for now. Her team of doctors discussed it and they don't want her to take on too much, too soon. I personally think she can handle it just fine and wish they'd let her work as much as she wants too. And she does want to work more than the meager hours per week they've allowed. She said she gets very bored the rest of the time, which I'm sure she does. Her work in the Processing Center isn't difficult. Basically she just greets and welcomes people into 13 and gets them started on paperwork. Right now she's only working there a few hours a week. The rest of the time, she's just on her own so it's no wonder she gets bored. She did start watching Posy in the afternoons for a few hours almost every day. It was her idea and it was greatly received by my family. Don't get me wrong, we all love our little Posy to pieces but sometimes she's a handful and sometimes it's nice to have a break from her. And I personally like that Madge loves Posy so much to want to get her so often. Old Madge was like that too and I'm glad New Madge is the same in that way.

I'm just about to head out for the day when Haymitch pokes his head into the room.

"Hey kiddo, need ya to come take a look at something before ya go."

"Sure." I say as I shove back from the table and follow him into his office.

"New developments with Madge's father. Thought you'd wanna see for yourself." He says as he clicks on a viewing device and a video clip begins to play.

My stomach churns as I drop down into a chair, my eyes glued to the screen and wanting to look away at the same time. I watch as her father sits, strapped to a chair and looks nearly unconscious as he receives periodic zaps of electricity. The only thing proving he isn't unconscious though is the intermittent sound of his agonizing cries. Haymitch reaches forward and clicks off the device after a few minutes of my watching.

"That goes on for hours but you get the gist."

"Snow aired that for all of Panem?" I ask as I imagine that being played as a mandatory viewing.

"No. Not yet anyway. This is footage from inside the prison. One of our guys just transferred there and he was able to get us a copy."

"When you say not yet…you mean eventually this will air?"

"Not sure but I think so. My opinion is that the longer Madge stays hidden, the angrier Snow will get. Eventually he's gonna pull out all the stops to get her to crawl outta hiding. He isn't gonna let this go. Not now, not ever."

"Can't we do something to help? Something to get her father out of there?"

"Not sure. It would be damn near impossible. Even tougher than breaking her outta that arena. Personally, I haven't ruled it out though. Just wanted to share this with you for now. Gonna be the topic of discussion at tomorrow's department meeting, didn't wantcha caught off guard." He says gruffly.

I nod, swallowing as I try to find my voice. "Uh, thanks." I manage as I stand and leave the room. This was not what I'd wanted to see. Not something that was easy to see. And now, I was going to have to tell Madge about it. Technically, I'm not supposed to tell her since it's classified department information, but after how upset she was last time about the videos of her father there's no way I'm not going to tell her about it. It's going to be hard though to tell her about this just because it is her father and it is confirmation that he's being tortured relentlessly.

There has to be a way though. A way to do something. Anything. How long can Snow torture him anyway? What's his plan when Madge doesn't appear? Is he going to air that horrific footage all over Panem? And then what? What'll he do when even that doesn't give him what he wants? What's his move then? A huge part of me is almost afraid to find out.

(Madge POV)

"Now all you have to do is wrap this piece around here and then give both loops a good tug to tighten it up." I tell Posy as I show her how to tie her shoelaces.

"It's hard." She pouts as she scrunches up her face in frustration.

"Well it is right now, sure. But if you keep practicing it'll get easier. I promise." I reassure her as I untie the laces and hold them out for her to try again.

I've been watching her after school more often now. Being by myself so much was getting very boring and I enjoy her company anyway. And I think that Hazelle, Rory and Vick appreciate a little time without her as well. Living quarters are small here and I think that with her large personality, she can sometimes make those spaces seem a little too small. So when I asked Hazelle if I could borrow Posy most afternoons, she gratefully agreed. As did an eager Posy. So, whenever I'm not working, which is more often than not, I get time with Posy.

Some days we draw pictures, others we go for walks. Sometimes, like today, I try to teach her something new. We've been working on learning to tie her shoes for about an hour now and she's doing better but she still doesn't have it down yet. It looks like it'll take more afternoons of practice before she can do it on her own. But, she is trying and that's really all that matters.

As she sits and practices, I reach down and play with her hair. It's dark just like Gale's is. I wonder, if when Gale and I have children, if they'll have dark hair like him or blonde like me? Or would it be something in between that perhaps? Secretly, I hope that they have dark hair like Gale but blue eyes like me. I think they'd be the most beautiful of children. Ever since Gale mentioned that he wants a house full of children one day, I keep catching myself daydreaming about what it'll be like. I picture Gale coming in the front door, me with dinner on the stove, a whole scad of little dark haired, blue eyed children racing down the stairs to greet him at the front door. I picture it being perfect. Absolutely perfect. And then I find myself remembering how things really are. Or how they'll actually be, rather. There won't be a staircase for the children to go bounding down or a kitchen for me to be cooking dinner in. Nope, not for us. Us, we'll be trapped here in 13. We'll have living quarters, not a house. It won't be the daydream I keep seeing in my mind.

When that brings me down, I try to remind myself just how fortunate we really are to be here and then I feel guilty for even being the slightest bit disappointed that my daydream won't play out exactly perfectly. And honestly, wouldn't I trade all of that in a heartbeat for children who will never be pawns or puppets for the Capitol to toy with? For children who will never have to fight other children just to stay alive? For my husband to have a job that doesn't have him slaving away for ridiculous amounts of hours for pathetic wages? For all of our safety? Yes, yes. If given the choice, I'd trade it a thousand times over again. I'm extremely lucky to be here in 13 and even when that's not what I'd expected my life to be like or what I'd pictured for myself, I should always try and remember that. I am one very, very lucky girl.

I've just finished securing Posy's pigtail braids when Gale comes in from work. I smile as the little girl leaps at him, screeching his name. He swoops her up in his arms and kisses her forehead.

"How're my two favorite girls doing?" He asks sounding energetic but something seems a little off and he isn't looking me in the eye. Something's wrong.

"Madge's teaching me to tie my shoes. It's hard work but I'm a good practicer." She informs him with confidence.

"That's great. Listen, me and Madge can't go to dinner tonight with you so we'll walk you up there to Ma, but then we're gonna have to leave."

Before Posy can even get her tantrum underway, Gale cuts her off, adding, "And if you throw a fit about it, you won't be allowed to come back over tomorrow. Got it missy?" And he says it sternly enough that she clamps her mouth shut and folds her arms over her chest. Still not happy about it but not willing to sacrifice her time with me tomorrow for it.

Yes, there must be something wrong for certain. Gale would never be short with her like that if nothing was wrong. Posy throws fits all the time and usually he just rolls his eyes but today's different. Today he's not having it from her. And the fact that he just said we won't be making it to dinner doesn't forewarn of good things either. Please don't let it be a mission I plead in my head. Please, please don't let him be leaving for a mission. Not yet. I'm not mentally ready for that yet.

After we carry Posy to the cafeteria, we walk silently back down to our place. Gale still hasn't looked my way yet. Still hasn't made eye contact with me. The most he does is reach over to take my hand in his but his grasp is stiff. Whatever's wrong, it's really bad.

Back in our place, we sit down on the bed but before he begins to speak he gets up and starts pacing back and forth the small room.

"Gale, whatever it is, just tell me."

He keeps pacing and then finally stops, turns to me and takes a deep breath. "I saw something today that was hard to see. Hard to learn about. And I don't want to tell you but I have to tell you and I don't know how to do it."

"Just tell me. It's okay, just tell me."

He comes towards me, stopping just in front of me and taking both of my hands in his. Another deep breath and then he finally speaks.

"There was another video of your father. A prison surveillance video sent to us by someone how works undercover in the prison."

I swallow and try to ignore the anxious feeling growing in my chest. "What was on the video?" I ask quietly.

"They're hurting him."

"We already knew that was happening, didn't we? Assumed it at least?" I ask trying to clarify what's different about this time.

"Assuming and then seeing are two totally different things. It's bad. A lot worse than I assumed it was. "

"Do I want to know details?" I ask swallowing. Part of me thinks I won't.

He shakes his head. Closes his eyes. I know he's trying to push whatever it is he saw out of his mind. I refuse to let my own mind start imagining the things he must have seen on that video. I can't let my mind go there.

"Why show it to us? Why send it to 13?" I ask, trying desperately to focus on reasons rather than reality.

He shrugs. "I think just to keep us informed of where Snow's head is at right now."

"Because of me. Snow's still searching for me." I say aloud as it sinks a little further in. "Is he airing the video for everyone to see?"

"No. Haymitch thinks he might show it eventually though."

"And he would do that to try and entice me out of here? To get me to turn myself in?" I ask with a sickening feeling taking over.

He nods. "But we don't even need to talk about that. That's never something we need to even think about."

"Isn't there anything we can do? The person who sent us the video, can't they help him somehow? Do something to make it less terrible for him?" I ask, tears welling up, my voice cracking.

He grabs me and hugs me tightly against him. "I don't know Madge but I promise if ever there's a way to help him, I'll make sure it happens. I promise you that."

He lets me rest against his chest as the tears silently fall. Holds onto me as I try not to let my heart hurt so much for my father. I have such mixed feelings about him and the things that he did to my mother, the things he kept from me and lied to me about but no matter what he's still my father. When I finally wipe the tears away and pull back from him, he brushes his fingertips over my cheeks.

"I'm sorry this is happening. Sorry you had to hear about it. Sorry we can't help him." He apologizes softly as he looks at me. I can see that this is just as hard on him as it is on me.

"Thank you for telling me about it. I know that wasn't the easiest of things for you to have to tell me."

"You wanna go for a walk or something? Maybe see if the cafeteria's still serving dinner?"

"I wish we could get some fresh air." I grumble under my breath.

"Me too. Settle for the agriculture center, sitting under a potted tree instead?"

"If I have too." I say with a sigh as I let him pull me to my feet.

"Come on, we'll swing by the cafeteria, see if Peeta's still there. Maybe he can slip us a snack or something to take with us."

We walk upstairs and I wait outside the cafeteria doors while Gale slips inside to the kitchen to talk to Peeta. I'm not really in the mood to see anyone and chat right now. I'm angry at Snow, worried for my father and the helplessness I feel about it all is making 13 seem more claustrophobic than usual. There just has to be something that can be done to put an end to all of this. There just has to be.

_**A/N: My apologies for making you wonderful people wait for almost a week for this chapter to post! Hope you enjoy it and I'll try not to make you wait quite so long for the next chapter!**_


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24**

(Madge POV)

Gale had been right about Peeta being able to sneak us a snack to take to the tree area with us. Gale returned to me carrying two crisp, red apples. I make a mental note that I should seek Peeta out sometime tomorrow, see how he's doing. He's been so kind to me and to Gale and helped us all along the way but I wonder how he's doing. I know it was rough for him not having his family here with him and I know that Katniss just got injured and that must not be easy to deal with. I don't even know if during the rescue mission if they were able to save any of his friends from town or not. I hope so. I really hope so. He's been so kind and I hate to think of him being all alone here.

"Gale, did Peeta's family get put into prison like my father? I mean, I know they were taken to the Capitol for questioning but what happened to them after that?"

"I dunno. I can ask Haymitch tomorrow, try to find out for you if you want."

"I'd appreciate it. I'd hate to think they were enduring the same fate as my father. It isn't their fault that we all escaped and they were left behind. They didn't know what was happening."

"None of us knew what was happening." Gale corrects quietly.

"Who did know? I mean, someone must've known something."

"Mrs. Krull and Haymitch. Some undercover people too. Peacekeeper for sure. Maybe a train worker too."

"Who would've known that Mrs. Krull was a part of a connection to 13. Or our very own drunken Victor for that matter." I muse aloud.

Gale takes a bite of his apple and pulls me to lean against him as we sit on the bench under one of the trees. We're both quiet for a little while, neither of us in a particularly chatty mood.

"Do you think they'll go back to 12 anytime soon?" I ask Gale quietly. He really isn't supposed to tell me about the business of the Defense Department but he does anyway.

"Yeah, eventually. I really doubt anyone will be left by then though. From what I've heard, everything was destroyed. If anyone managed to live through that, they'd have to be able to survive the woods. It'd be hard for sure."

"Will you go with them when they go back to look for survivors?"

"Probably. Especially if they're looking in the woods."

"Do you think you'll go inside the district at all?"

Gale shrugs. "If I could. All depends on the situation. Why?"

"Just curious is all. It's hard for me to imagine what 12 looks like now."

"Yeah, I'm not sure if I want to see it or if I'm better off just remembering it like it was."

Another quiet moment passes between us. We just sit, me leaning against him, as we both try to picture what our former district would look like to us now. Would we recognize it? Would there be any buildings or houses that survived? Would it be like the images of the original 13 after the Capitol destroyed it? At every reaping day they'd shown all of Panem horrific images of the wasteland that 13 became following the rebellion. It was supposed to scare us. Supposed to show us what would happen if we too tried to rebel against the Capitol. And I have to say, it did scare me. A lot.

Once we go back to our place and get in bed I find it difficult to sleep. Every time I manage to drift off, I have dreams that shake me back awake. Dreams that are completely dark and I could hear my father crying out for me as I searched the darkness for him, never quite able to find him. I wake up, calm myself down, reminding myself it was only a dream and then roll over, trying to find sleep again. And the cycle repeated over and over throughout the night. I don't think Gale slept much either because neither of us get up and go to breakfast this morning. When Gale left for work, I still haven't even gotten out of bed. After he leaves, I pull the blanket over my head and close my eyes again hoping that this time, the dreams will stay away and I can just sleep.

(Gale POV)

After a night filled with bad dreams, replays of the torture Mayor Undersee was enduring, I drag myself into work. I was so exhausted I didn't even go to breakfast. I don't think Madge slept well either. She tossed and turned a lot it seemed. And she was sleepy this morning too. When I left to come here, she was awake but still in bed. I hope she's able to go back to sleep and get some rest.

I slump into the chair and try to focus on the communication logs I was working on yesterday. I must doze off at some point because Haymitch ends up smacking a mug of coffee on the table and I jump clear out of my seat.

"Drink up kiddo. Need ya awake for our departmental meeting later. Gonna want your input on everything." He says shoving the mug towards me, a little of the dark liquid spilling onto the pages of communication in front of me.

I take a drink, burning my tastebuds as I swallow it down. It tastes terrible but refreshing at the same time. Almost like the caffeine has started to hit me right away. I drink more. "Thanks. Didn't sleep real good last night. Hard to shake the memory of what I saw." I explain to him.

He nods just once. Not that he says anything about it but something tells me that he himself doesn't always sleep so well. Like he too has been haunted more than once by something he's had to see.

"Meeting is right after lunch. They'll show a few minutes of the tape so that everyone's on the same page and then discussion will open up as to what, if anything, can be done about it."

"I'll be ready. Thanks for the coffee." I tell him as I look back to my log again. I use my sleeve to wipe away the little puddles of coffee Haymitch spilled. It makes the ink on the paper smear but I figure that won't matter since I'm more or less just reading this as busywork. Besides, if there anything of value in here it would have been found long ago.

I find that the communications leaving Madge's house are at all hours of the day and night. It's like Mayor Undersee never slept. Never took a break. Always, always working. There are a few noteworthy things on a personal note. I notice more than once where it is suggested by the Capitol that Mayor Undersee extend the working shifts of the miners from 12 hours per day to 15 hours per day. The suggestion is accompanied by statistics that show how coal mining production would increase therefore increasing district revenue. Each time it was suggested, Mayor Undersee managed to tactfully decline the increase of hours. And really, aside form the Capitol, he would be the only person to benefit from such actions. It isn't as if us miners would benefit. And an increase in district revenue would increase Mayor Undersee's paycheck. He turned down money so that we wouldn't have to work even more ridiculous hours than we already did.

Another thing I notice is how the Capitol suggested an increase in electricity prices for those in 12 who were lucky enough to have it. This was so that he could afford to have the fence turned on at all times. Again, he declined, stating that there had never been an instance of anyone going out into the woods or crossing the fence. He argued it was better to have the power to the fence work intermittently so as to possibly catch anyone who dared to cross it. It was a lie of course. He knew good and well that Katniss and I used to go out there and hunt. I'm terribly glad he argued against keeping the fence power running nonstop. If that had ever happened, my family and I wouldn't be alive right now. There's no way we ever would have managed without my being able to hunt for food. Katniss's family either. A huge part of me really wishes I could ask him about this. Ask him why it is he wanted the fence to be off sometimes. Was it so people like myself and Katniss could survive?

This man, my father in law, had apparently done whatever he could to keep 12 from becoming a prison in and of itself. Sure he couldn't change the way most things in 12 ran but according to the logs I'm reading, he did do what he could when he could to make life for all of us better. And turning down a suggestion made by the Capitol is never an easy thing to do. It takes real guts along with smarts to find a way to spin their suggestion so that it doesn't look as good as they originally thought. If I ever do manage to see him again, I'm going to make sure I thank him.

When lunchtime rolls around, I stop by our place to get Madge but she's sound asleep so I don't wake her. I leave her a little note on the pillow next to her.

_Stopped by to take you to lunch but you looked so peaceful sleeping here that I couldn't bare to wake you. See you for dinner my love._

I end up grabbing my sandwich and taking it back down to work. I want to be here when the meeting begins and be ready to have my say in all of it. I hope that amongst us all, we can come up with a way to help Madge's father. I'd love nothing more than to come home tonight and be able to tell her that a plan is in the works. That there's something that can be done for him.

I mutter a few hellos and nod to a few as the rest of the department begins to file in as I wait very impatiently for the meeting to begin. Finally, Haymitch shuffles in and calls the meeting to order.

"Listen up folks. We're gonna show you a few minutes of some footage sent to us from inside a Capitol prison. Just watch it, then we'll talk after." He instructs as he clicks on the video.

I look away while the video plays out for everyone else. I've already seen all I'll ever need to see of that. Images and sounds burned forever into my mind. As it plays I expect to hear gasps from those around me but to my surprise, I don't hear a peep. Once the video stops playing, I look back at the group. I see concern on faces. Disgust even. But I don't see shock like I'd expected. I guess after awhile, you learn what to expect from our dear President Snow. His evil ways eventually loose shock value I suppose.

"Alright. So here's what we've gotta decide, is there anything we can do about this?" He asks as he settles into a chair.

"What we need is a way to get rid of President Snow. That would solve quite a few problems." A woman from another team says evoking a series of agreeing nods and yeses from around the room.

"We've been down this road before, Ethel. It isn't like we haven't thought about it from every possible angle. He's too powerful, we just can't take on something of that magnitude. We just can't." A tired looking man replies.

"I realize that. It was merely just a thought I shared aloud. A thought we're all probably having."

I haven't said anything yet but I feel like I need to. I clear my throat and go for it. "Listen, I agree with the comment about Snow being the root of all problems but I think we should focus on what we can do for Mayor Undersee. He's being tortured and unless we can find a way to help him, it's going to continue."

"You want us to break into a Capitol Prison and rescue a prisoner that Snow's most likely watching like a hawk?" A grumpy man across the table from me asks with a raised brow.

"I don't know what we can do, I just think there has to be something." I reply.

"How many guys do we have working for us in that prison right now?" Another man asks. I haven't learned many of the names here of the people who aren't on Haymitch's team.

A woman taking meeting notes pulls up something on her computer and then answers the question. "We have three total. Two Peacekeepers, an administrative clerk."

"And just how big is this place?" Someone else questions her.

She pecks a few more keys on her computer and then answers. "It's the smallest of all Capitol prisons, however it's reportedly the most secure. Only the worst of the worst get sent here. Solitary cells. Solitary torture. Able to house up to 100 prisoners. Peacekeeper to prisoner ratio is 9 to 1."

Crap. 9 to 1? That's horrible. We'll never be able to get to Madge's father with 9 peacekeepers hovering over him!

"Well if we can't get him out, can we do anything else to help him?" A woman asks in a quiet voice, not looking up.

"What are you suggesting?" Haymitch asks the woman.

"Only that if we don't anticipate a rescue, should we find a way to end this all for him? Have one of our men slip him a pill or something of the like. Something to put an end to all his agony."

Kill Madge's father? They want to kill Madge's father? How is that helping him?

"I agree with her. If we're one hundred percent confident that we won't be able to rescue him ever then we should consider ending this for him." I hear a man's voice pipe up. I'm staring down at the floor because I can't bare to look up at everyone.

"Are we really resorting to murder as an option here?" I ask deciding that I have to speak up. Have to fight this.

"Not murder. We wouldn't do anything for him without his consent. We'd have one of our guys provide him a lethal pill. It would be up to him as to if he decides to take it or not." The quiet woman explains softly showing her compassionate side.

I run my hands over my face. I can't imagine this as our only option. There just has to be something better. There just has to be. "But is there really nothing else we can do? Is this really our only option?"

"Right now, with the kind of security he's buried beneath, no, there isn't another option."

"I say we take a vote and begin plan development. The more time we waste discussing this, the longer that poor man has to suffer."

Everything feels like a blur. I can't even match up voices to faces anymore. My mind is desperately screaming for any other option. Madge. Madge needs a say in this. It's her father for crying out loud. If anyone deserves a vote, it's her. "I think his daughter should be given a vote. If this were my father, I'd want to be able to have some sort of say in it."

"She doesn't work in this department. This is classified information." The grumpy man barks at me.

"It's her father!" I spit back at him.

"Hey, hey, hey. No need to get all huffy about it. I think the kid has a point. It is the girl's father and it's not unreasonable to get her opinion on the matter." Haymitch breaks in before tempers boil over too much.

"Fine. Someone go get her so we can get this over with. Let her vote." The grumpy man says sitting back in his chair and folding his arms over his chest.

I look at Haymitch waiting to see what he'll say. He tilts his head to the side and gestures to the door. "Better go get her Gale. We need to wrap this up."

I stand, legs feeling a little shaky and head out without saying a word. I hate that I'm about to have to bring her down her and make her have a say on such an unthinkable matter. It breaks my heart to have to do this but there's no possible way that I can let them make this kind of decision without her input. No possible way.


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25**

(Madge POV)

After waking up and seeing that I've slept through lunch, I decide I need to go ahead and get up. If I lay here much longer I'm afraid that I may fall back asleep and if that happens I know I'll never be tired enough to sleep come bedtime tonight. I stretch my arms over my head as my feet hit the cold, cement floor. I miss carpet. Plush, soft, squish between your toes carpet. The kind I had in my room back home. Well, in my room before I was married anyway.

I shuffle over to the bathroom and turn on the shower. As I peel off my clothes, I glance at my reflection in the mirror. My hair is finally growing back where it had been shaved so they could stitch me up. I think it'll take forever before it catches up to the rest of my hair though. And the scars on my face are the same as always. Pink toned and obvious. I let out a quiet sigh as I step into the shower. The steamy water feels good and wakes me up a bit. I'm just finishing rinsing out my shampoo when I hear Gale's voice calling out to me. I turn off the water and step out of the shower where Gale is waiting, handing me a towel.

"Thanks." I say as I take it and dry off. "What are you doing home so early?"

"I'm supposed to come get you and bring you down to the departmental meeting." He says quietly. I study his face for a few seconds before saying anything else. He has that burdened look he gets when things are weighing heavily on him. Something's wrong.

"What's wrong? You've got that look. And what on earth do you need me for at your meeting?"

He gives me the saddest of smiles and then starts explaining. "There was a meeting, right now actually, about your father, for us to figure out what, if anything we can do to help him. I felt like you should have a say in what was going on."

"Oh, I see. Well, let me get dressed and I'll come with you." I tell him.

"Okay. Hurry though, we won't want to keep them all waiting."

I rub the towel over my head and pull on clean clothes. After slipping on my shoes without bothering to re-tie them, I stand and reach out for Gale's hand. He takes it, leading me out of our place and over to the Defense Department. When we arrive, Haymitch is waiting at the front desk for us.

"I filled out all the paperwork for temporary clearance. Just need a signature." He says pushing a small packet of paperwork towards me. I flip through the pages until I find the one on the back where there's a line for my signature and scribble my name on it. I smile up at Gale as I hand Haymitch the packet back.

"What?" He whispers down at me, not understanding my smile.

"It's the first time I've written my married name." I whisper back to him. It's silly, I know, but I kind of liked it. Liked how it looked on paper.

Gale smiles back at me for a moment before we're interrupted by Haymitch. "If you two lovebirds are done whispering to each other over there, we've got a room full of people waiting to vote."

I feel my cheeks blush and I hide a little behind Gale out of embarrassment. Gale just nods to him and pulls me to follow him and Haymitch down the hallway. We enter the meeting room and I suddenly feel very shy as multiple heads turn and all eues are on me. Gale gives my hand a gentle squeeze and pulls me to sit down next to him. Once we're seated, I don't let go of his hand, holding it tightly underneath the table.

"Alright, let's catch the lovely Mrs. Hawthorne up to speed on everything and then get on with the vote." Haymitch begins. "Here's the short version sweetie, your father's in a rough spot. Snow's doing a bang up job of torturing him and we've been trying to figure out how we could help."

I nod, keeping my eyes on Haymitch, waiting for the part where he tells me how they think they can help.

"It seems that the place they've got him makes it impossible for us to rescue him. The only other thing we see possible is to have one of our few inside guys slip him a lethal pill. Something to end his suffering. What we need from you, is your vote."

"My vote?" I squeak out.

"Yeah. Your vote. Do you want us to slip him a pill or leave him be?"

"Oh, I see." I reply, looking down at my lap. My mind swirling all over the place. A lethal pill? The best option they've come up with is a lethal medication to put him out of his misery? There won't be a rescue?

"It would be given to him with an option for him to decide whether or not to take it. The choice would be all his own. We would only be providing an option." Gale says quietly, leaning down to me.

"Can I have a moment alone? I won't take long, I just need a minute." I ask quietly as I stand up.

"Use my office. Down the hall, third door on the left." Haymitch says. I nod and begin in that direction trying to ignore the annoyed looks on the faces of the people in the room. Once I'm out in the hallway though, I feel Gale's presence behind me.

"No, just me. I need to be alone with my thoughts for a moment." I explain to him, hoping he won't be offended that I don't want him to come with me.

"Okay. I'll wait right here for you. Take as much time as you need." He tells me leaning back against the wall to wait. His eyes reflect the sadness I hear in his voice. I'm not sure if it's sadness for me not wanting him with me right now or if it's sadness for me having to make a decision as to how I'll vote. I don't have time to think about that just now though. I step into Haymitch's office and shut the door behind me. The smell of liquor and stale air makes my nose twitch.

How do I decide this? How would my father want me to vote? On one hand, the thought that we'd be giving him a way to put an end to his pain and suffering gives me a sense of comfort. To know that he would ultimately have that final decision, that it would be his choice. But on the other hand, sending him that pill would be giving up in a way. Saying that every option had been fully explored and there was no better solution. Sending that pill would be the end of my father. Do I really want to send my father the message that there isn't any hope?

Was there really no possible way to get him out? And what happens if we send him this pill and he takes it and dies? Does President Snow go after my mother next? Mabel? The Mellarks? Where does it end? It doesn't . It just doesn't end. Not with someone like Snow making all the rules and calling all the shots.

(Gale POV)

I pace back and forth across the hallway as I wait for Madge to come out of Haymitch's office. When she'd asked if she could have a minute alone, I just naturally assumed that meant a minute away from everyone else in the room, not me. Out in the hallway though, I'd found different. She really did mean she wanted to be alone though I don't think she meant it to be anything towards me. Still, it stung a little. I hope whatever's running through her mind right now isn't too painful for her. I know this isn't an easy vote for her but I truly felt that she had to be here and be a part of this. And however she chooses to vote, that's how I plan to cast my vote too. Whatever she decides, I'm going to support her any way that I can.

When she finally comes out of Haymitch's office her face tearstained and her eyes are red. Whatever she's decided, it hasn't been without inner torment. I hold out my hand to her and give hers a squeeze. I lead us back into the meeting room and we sit down.

"Alright, ready to vote?" Haymitch asks.

Madge nods but doesn't speak. I hold her hand a little tighter, wishing I could somehow make this easier for her.

"Those in favor of sending a lethal dose to , raise your hand."

My eyes are peeled on Madge as I wait to see if her hand raises in favor or not. When I see her shaking palm raise, my own hand goes up as well. Only then do I look around the room and see how many other hands are raised. Almost every hand. Enough that Madge's vote wouldn't have mattered either way but I still feel it was important she have a say.

"Guess that's a yes then. Alright, that's enough for today, my team will begin plan development tomorrow and we'll see if we can't get this taken care of by week's end." Haymitch says.

Madge's hand drops back to her lap and I watch as a teardrop falls, wetting the gray fabric of her pants. I need to get her out of her so she can deal with this privately. I don't want her to fall apart right here in front of everyone and I also don't want her to have to desperately hold herself together either. I stand up and gently pull her to her feet as well, leading her out of the room.

"Come on, let's get you home." I tell her softly as we start to head down the hallway and out of the department.

"It's okay, you can stay if you have work to finish up. I'll see you at home later, okay?"

"No. I'm finished for today. I'll come with you." I reassure her.

We're almost out of the department when she stops and turns to me. "Gale, I really just want to be alone right now. It isn't that I don't want you to be with me, I just…" She begins.

"You don't have to explain anything. Just go, I'll be up later. Soon, okay?" I cut her off before she can finish. I hate that it feels as if she's pulling away from me right now when I want to do is comfort her but whatever the reason, if being alone is what she wants, needs right now, I'll give her that.

"Bye." She says as I lean down to kiss her forehead. She looks so sad that it's heartbreaking. I watch as she disappears from view.

I head back to Haymitch's office wanting to see if he has any idea how this will all go down and realistically how soon.

"You still here?" He asks when I poke my head in his door.

"Yeah, for a little longer anyway. Just wanted to see how you thought this would realistically play out. Like how soon?"

"We'll figure all that out in development but I hope to have the pill in his hands by the end of the week."

"Is it quick? Will he hurt at all when he takes it?" I ask feeling like there are just so many things I need to know about this plan.

"Again, things to learn about in our development meeting. Listen kiddo, do yourself and the girl a favor and get outta here for the rest of the day."

"She didn't want any company right now." I explain.

"Course not. She's hurting. It's her father, you don't think she'll grieve her father? Go and just be there for her, however she'll let you. I'll see you in the morning." He says waving me off.

He's right. She's grieving her father's death. It may not have happened just yet but she's grieving just the same. And she won't get a chance to say goodbye to him. If anyone knows what that feels like, it's me. Still, I don't want to go home just yet. I do want to allow her the time alone she wanted. But I can do something to help in the meantime.

I head up to the agriculture center and find the section with the flowers. It's a small section and it's not one open to just anyone, I have to swipe my badge to get inside. There's a worker there and she looks a little startled when I come into the room where she's busy tending to flowers.

"May I help you with something?" She asks wiping her hands on her apron.

"Sorry if I startled you. I'm Gale Hawthorne, from the Defense Department and I wanted to ask your help with something."

"Of course. What can I be of assistance with?"

"It's for my wife. She's grieving the death of her father and I'm sort of at a loss as to how to comfort her right now. I was wondering if I could have a flower to cheer her up?"

"Oh, the poor dear! I'd be happy to put something together for you. My own father passed away a few years back and it was a terrible time for me. A coworker of mine brought me flowers and it was so much more of a comfort than anything else she could have done." She says sympathetically as she begins darting around cutting a few orange flowers and arranging them in a vase.

"Thank you for your kindness, this will help a lot, I'm sure of it."

"I'm sure it will too. These are called Tiger Lilies. They'll last for quite awhile if she keeps the water in the vase fresh." She says as she hands me the vase of flowers. She must've cut at least a dozen blooms and I'd only asked for a single flower.

"I can't thank you enough for this, really, it's more than I'd hoped you'd be able to do. Thank you." I tell her gratefully.

She places her hand gently on my forearm and gives me a sad smile. "It was my pleasure, really. She'll be in my thoughts."

"I'll be sure to return the vase as soon as she's finished with it."

"Of course, no worries."

I smile at her and head out of the room, leaving her once again to her work. I'm so grateful for her kindness and I'm so glad that she was working when I went in there. I hope these help ease the pain Madge is feeling right now. I hope they show her how much I care and how sorry I am that she's going through this right now.

When I walk up to our door, I hear Posy inside singing. Crap. I'd forgotten that Posy would be here. I should've thought of that and gone to get her from school so Madge wouldn't have to watch her. I open the door and see Madge laying on the bed with Posy kneeling next to her, singing some song she's making up as she goes along.

When Posy sees me, she goes right into her explanation. "Madge is sad today so I'm in charge of cheering her up. That's why I have to sing to her."

Madge sits up and wipes her tears away, giving Posy a loving smile before turning to me. "Those are beautiful. Where did you find them?"

I look down at my hand, having been so distracted by Posy that I'd forgotten I was holding Madge's flowers. "Oh, I got them for you. Thought they might help. They're tiger lilies." I tell her as I set the vase on the night table next to the bed.

"I love them. Thank you." She says, reaching out and running her finger over the petals of one of the lilies.

"And now, I'm taking Miss Posy here off your hands and giving you the quiet time you wanted." I tell her as I reach down and swoop Posy up in my arms.

She looks up at me, her face a whole mix of sadness and thankfulness. Sadness about her father, thankfulness that I'm trying to be there for her however I can, even if that means not actually being with her.

"But Gale, I'm not finished cheering her up yet!" Posy whines.

"You were a big help Posy and I feel better already. Go on with Gale and I'll see you later, okay?" Madge tells her before I even have a chance to say anything and then she reaches over to her flowers, pulling one stem from the vase and handing it to Posy. "Here, to thank you for singing to me."

Posy's whole face lights up and she clutches the flower to her chest.

"What do you say Posy?" I prompt her.

"Thank you!" She says leaning over from my arms to hug Madge.

"You're very welcome."

I lean over and kiss Madge softly on the forehead again. "I'll bring your dinner back here later, okay?"

"Love you." She says so quietly I can barely hear her.

I take Posy and head up to my family's home to hang out with them for awhile. It'll give Madge the space she needs and me an excuse to visit with my family. I don't hang out with them near as often as I should. And almost never by myself. Usually, it's both Madge and I together.

"I certainly hope you aren't bringing her back because she was being anything less than well behaved." My mother says with a pointed look at Posy as I surprise them by bringing her back early.

"Nah, not this one. In fact, she was being such a big help that she got a present." I say as I put Posy down on the floor.

"Look Ma! Madge gave me this because I was so good at cheering her up!" She states as she proudly holds up her flower for my mother to examine.

"My, my, what a pretty flower! Why don't you go have Rebekah help you put it in some water? She and Rory are in the back room playing a game with Vick."

After she skips out of the room, my mother turns to me. "Madge is sad? Did something happen?"

"Can't really talk about it. Classified stuff." I say as I internally debate telling her about it anyway.

"Gale, I'm your mother. Nothing is classified."

"Madge's father is getting the brunt of Snow's anger over our escape. The only way we know to help him is to offer him a lethal medicine so he can end his suffering. Madge is taking it pretty hard."

"Oh no, I wish I'd known! I would've sent Vick back down for Posy!" My mother says covering her mouth with her hand.

"No way you could've known. And should anyone ask anything, you'll need to say you know nothing."

"Understood. Where is she now?"

"Back home. She just wanted to be alone. Been like that all afternoon. I took her some flowers, I think it might help just a little."

"Grief is one of the most difficult things we ever encounter in life. Just be there for her however she needs you to be. It's the best you can do for her."

"I just wish there were something more I could do. I wish I could've come up with a better option to help him somehow but there just wasn't any way."

"Well, I hope that she'll at least find some peace in knowing he won't be suffering anymore, that his soul can be laid to rest." My mother says sadly.

"Wait, what did you say?"

"What? That she finds peace knowing his suffering will finally come to an end?" She repeats sounding confused.

"Ma, I've gotta go. You just gave me an idea and I have to go see Haymitch right now!" I exclaim as I dart out the door without waiting for a response. I run as fast as I can back down to the Defense Department, taking stairs three at a time. I can't believe I didn't think of this sooner! I don't know if it'll work but it's crazy enough that it just might save Mayor Undersee's life!


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26**

(Gale POV)

"What the hell?" Haymitch blurts out when I barge into his office, scaring the daylights out of him.

"What happens to the bodies of prisoners when they die?" I ask in ragged breath.

"Buried or incinerated probably. What are you really asking here?"

"What if there was a way to fake Mayor Undersee's death? And then when they move him, we can make our move and rescue him? Is that possible? Could that happen?"

"Slow down kiddo." He says holding up his hand and taking a sip out of his coffee mug. I can smell from here that it isn't all coffee in that mug.

"Could we create a pill that gives the illusion that he's dead but in truth he wouldn't be? He'd just be super knocked out?"

He stares into his mug for a minute and then nods. "I suppose. Have to talk to someone in apothecary to be sure. I'm not exactly a chemist."

"Okay, so let's suppose then that they could make that happen. He takes the pill, appears to be dead. They'd have to dispose of his body and that's how we get our chance to swoop in and grab him, bring him back here. And then the medics could wake him back up or whatever and he'd be safe."

"Come on, let's go see what we can find out about prison procedures for body disposal. See if this is even worth looking into before we go having potions and pills created." He says as he stands, takes another gulp from the mug and shuffles out the door.

I follow him into a small office where the woman who was giving us the prison stats during our meeting is seated at a computer, chewing the tip of her pencil.

"We need some more information on that prison they're holding Mr. Undersee in. Can you find out what they do with the bodies of deceased prisoners?" Haymitch asks her without even greeting her.

She pecks away at the keyboard, pausing as information loads to the screen. She reads the data, her lips moving silently as she does. Finally, she looks up at us and speaks. "Bodies are transported to another facility for autopsy then incinerated."

"How far away is that facility and do we have any information about the transport process?"

She again consults her computer and then looks back up at us. "No information available about transport procedures. I'll keep searching and let you know what I find on that. As for the distance to the other facility, it's 12.8 miles. A research lab facility."

"Thanks Lucie. Let me know as soon as you get the procedures for transporting the bodies from the prison to the facility."

"I'll keep you posted." She says without looking up from her computer screen, her fingers furiously typing away.

I follow Haymitch back to his office again and we sit down. He pulls out a tablet and starts to jot things down.

"Alright, if we plan on rescuing him, we need to consider that a plan may need to happen simultaneously to rescue the mother and housekeeper too. Once Mr. Undersee's out of the picture, he'll be forced to focus on what's left of the girl's family."

"What about the Mellarks? Peeta's family? Could we get them out too?" I ask. If we're going to rescue Madge's mother and Mabel, we may as well try and get the Mellarks too.

His face shows surprise for a minute before he responds. "The Mellarks? They're already gone, son."

"Gone?" I echo back, not sure I'm understanding him.

"Thought for sure Katniss would've told you. Casualties of the Capitol and Snow's quest to hunt all of us down."

"She didn't tell me anything. What happened?"

"They were small, easy targets. Made sense for Snow to go after them first. He needs Madge's father alive so he can use him to torture and taunt Madge out of hiding so he couldn't kill him right off. The Mellarks served no purpose other than showing everyone what can happen to your family if you make Snow look foolish on national television. It's the same thing that woulda happened to the likes of your family or the Everdeens and Krulls had we left you all behind in 12."

"So Peeta knows about this?"

"Yeah kid, he knows."

He's about to say something else when Lucie comes in. "I have more information for you about those transfer procedures. The bodies are picked up within 24 hours and transported through a service by vehicle. It can carry up to 20 bodies at a time, all picked up from various places. Is there anything else I can help you with?"

"Actually yes. Need to find out where Mr. Undersee's wife and housekeeper are being held. The wife is in a medical facility but we need to check which one and the housekeeper is a prisoner."

"I'll have that for you right away." She says and then disappears as quickly as she came.

"Does that leave us a chance to save him? The transport process, I mean? Does it give us a window?" I ask, more eager than ever to save Madge's father.

"Possibly. It would take a lot of things falling into the right place at the right time. The fact that the bodies aren't destroyed at the prison itself was what we needed most. The fact that they use a service for transport is in our favor. Still, 12 miles of transport doesn't give us much wiggle room."

"But the possibility, it exists?"

"That it does kiddo, that it does. Right now what we have to hope for is that the housekeeper is in a different prison. No way we'd be able to get them both out with that fake death stunt of yours. It'd be too suspicious if they both went down at the same time in the same place. The mother should be much easier to get our hands on. Medical facilities aren't as secure as prisons. Still, being who she is and all, she'll likely have a peacekeeper keeping watch over her."

"Haymitch, we have to try and get them out. We just have too."

"Love the passion kid, I do but there's a lot that goes into a mission like this. A lot of very careful planning. We don't just hop in a hovercraft and go after em." He tells me, trying to get me to be patient as he sorts out all the details of possibility.

"How can I help right now? What can I do to speed this along?"

"By being patient and letting me do my job. And by keeping your trap shut about this whole thing. No sense in you telling that pretty girl of yours about this until we know it's gonna be able to happen. If you tell her now and it doesn't pan out you'll just be bringing on more heartbreak and grief for her, no sense in that." He warns.

"Can you hurry? I don't know how long I can keep this from her. I see her hurting in a way like I never have before and all I want to do is help her."

"I'll go as fast as I can. Undersee was good people in my book and I'd love to get him out of this mess alive just as much as you would. Now you head on out of here and I'll send someone to get you if anything comes to fruition before your shift tomorrow."

"You'll stay and work on this tonight? All night?" I ask.

"Yeah, I will." He reassures me and waves me off.

I head out of the Defense Department feeling more optimistic than ever. Haymitch said it was possible. Possible to save Madge's family. Possible. That single word had my hopes soaring. Possible.

(Madge POV)

After Gale leaves with Posy, I turn down the lights and crawl under the covers. I'm not sleepy, just incredibly sad. Overwhelmingly sad. There's an emptiness filling me that makes my heart ache in a way totally unfamiliar to me. I don't want anyone to talk to me or be with me right now. Not even Gale. I just want to be alone. Want to hide away from everyone and everything. I guess what I'm feeling is grief. I can't say that I've ever felt it before. Not that I remember anyway. And it's awful. My father may have done things I don't approve of and he may have lied about things but he's still my father and I still love him. He's a part of me and somehow, even though we've been apart for quite some time now, just knowing that his life is about to come to an end, rips me apart.

There are so many things I love about him and so many things I never really said to him that I wish I would have. I hate myself for failing to say them when I had the chance. And then there're all the things I can't remember. The moments that my mind's forgotten that I'll forever wonder about. Like how my father responded when I first told him I was in love with Gale or how we likely had a father-daughter dance at my wedding. Was he pleased that I found someone as wonderful as Gale? And then there are all the things I always imagined that will never happen now. He'll never get to be the amazing grandfather to my future children that I always knew he would be. He'll never get to see how well Gale and I are doing here in 13. He'll be gone forever. The moment that pill crosses his lips, everything will end for him. Everything.

I roll over in bed and even in the dim lighting I see my flowers from Gale. My beautiful flowers. I can't believe that he managed to find flowers for me. And the gesture was so utterly heartfelt, so kind and loving. He hadn't pushed at all when I'd asked to be alone. There was a touch of sadness and some confusion in his eyes but all the same, he'd given me exactly what I needed and I know it wasn't easy. And then he'd even gone further by bringing me the flowers. A way for him to show me that he's sorry I'm hurting. That he's thinking of me. That I can have my space but that he's here when I'm ready.

Posy herself had been incredibly kind as well. She'd come bounding into the place, ready to show me how good she's getting at tying her shoe laces when she'd found me all teary eyed. She'd crawled up on the bed next to me and done her very best to cheer me up, singing made up songs for me. Her childlike innocence didn't even press her to ask me what was wrong, only thing she saw was that I was upset and that she could help. I love her for that.

I get up and go into the bathroom and wash my face, pressing the cool washcloth against my stinging eyes. I've been crying for so long now that my face literally hurts. One look in the mirror only confirms that I look as dreadful on the outside as I feel on the inside. I'm a total mess. Red eyes. Puffy face. Hair all a tangled mess. Snotty nose from all the crying. I've got to try and pull myself together.

I turn on the shower and climb in. As good as the warm water feels, I'd give anything to have a long soak in a hot bath right now. To be able to lay back and sink down to my chin in warm, bubble filled and scented water. But this will have to do. And really, I should be grateful. It's sort of selfish of me to be wanting something like a bubble bath when my father is off being brutally tortured. I'm safe and sound and provided for while he's forced to waste away the last moments of his life in some miserable Capitol prison cell, all alone. Thinking about this brings forth a whole new wave of tears and I let myself slide down to the floor of the shower, rest my head against the tile and sob as the water pours down over me.

By the time Gale comes home and finds me, the water has long since run cold. I've lost all track of time, lost to my tears and my sadness. Gale doesn't say a word. Just turns off the water, wraps a towel around me and carries me to bed. He dries me off and pulls a nightshirt over my head. After that he climbs into bed with me and pulls me into his arms, holding me. He holds me as I lean my face against his chest. I'm no longer crying. Barely feeling. Just numb with all consuming, heart wrenching sadness.

"I'm so sorry that you're hurting." He finally whispers against my forehead.

"I'm sorry I'm such a wreck." I apologize as I pull back and look up at him. His lips press against my forehead and his hand gently brushes against my cheek.

"It's okay. I understand. Believe me, I understand what you're feeling right now."

His father died too. He does know exactly what I feel. "I know. I love you. Thank you for being so understanding. I'm going to try and pull it together, I promise."

"How about you start with something simple, like just pulling it together enough to eat something? I brought you dinner."

"Not really hungry."

"I know you're not but that doesn't mean you don't need to eat something. Maybe just a few bites?" He says as he gets up and retrieves a bag from the night table.

He opens it and pulls out a sandwich and an apple. "The kitchen was already closed but I swiped my badge and found some stuff to make you a sandwich."

"Did you get to eat? Earlier?" I ask as I twist the stem of the apple mindlessly.

"Yeah, I grabbed a bite while I made yours."

I nod, still twisting at the apple stem. He reaches over and takes half the sandwich, holding it out to me. "Here, just a few bites. You haven't eaten all day."

I humor him and take a bite. I have no appetite though and it's tasteless in my mouth. As I chew a second, tasteless bite, there's a knock at the door.

"Who could that be?" I wonder aloud.

Gale opens it and a person, a man, I don't recognize stands at the door. It must be someone from defense because he wears the same badge around their neck that Gale does. He hands Gale a slip of paper that he reads and then hands back to them.

"Tell him I'll be down in a few minutes." He says to the man at the door before shutting it and turning to me.

"I've gotta go back into work for a little while. You gonna be alright? I can have Rory come sit with you while I'm gone if you want."

"What's going on at work?" I ask ignoring his offer to send for Rory. He never has to go back in like this. Something's up.

"Just trying to help Haymitch with some stuff is all. I'll be back as soon as I can." He says kissing my forehead.

"Seriously, what's going on?"

He hesitates, obviously torn as to if he should tell me or not. "Madge, right now, the best thing you can do is trust me. I'll be back as soon as I can and then, if I'm able to, I'll explain all this."

"If I'm asleep when you get back, wake me up, okay?" I ask.

"I will, I promise. Love you." He says as he hurries out the door leaving me to wonder what in the world was going on that was so secretive he couldn't discuss it with me.


	27. Chapter 27

**Chapter 27**

(Gale POV)

"What's the news?" I ask the split second I enter Haymitch's office. All his note had said was that he had some news for me.

"Come on, let's take this to the meeting room. Everyone else should be here soon."

"Everyone else?" I ask, my hopes rising dangerously high.

"What? You thought just the two of us would handle this mission? Takes a few more folks than that."

I follow behind him, adrenaline gushing through my veins. We're doing it. We're really about to formulate a plan to save Madge's father. I just know it.

In the meeting room I find almost everyone is already here and waiting for us. And not looking too thrilled about either.

"Anyone care to explain why we were dragged down here again?" Someone grumbles followed by a chorus of agreement.

"It'll be worth it people. Just sit tight for a minute." Haymitch shushes the group as he sorts through papers in his hands.

I sit anxiously in my seat as I wait for the rest of the department to arrive. All I want is to get started. To find out what our plan is and to learn just how soon we can make it happen.

"Alright, here's the deal. We have a new plan for Mr. Undersee. Development will begin immediately. Execution needs to happen in the next week. And it's gonna be a multi-rescue plan so we'll be splitting into mission teams."

"What do you mean multi-rescue?"

"One team will rescue , one will rescue the Underee's housekeeper, and the third team will rescue Mrs. Undersee. Our goal is to have the rescues go off simultaneously. We'll need to be spot on with every detail or risk all of us failing."

"Three rescues?"

"How are we going to rescue him from a prison?"

"Have you lost your mind? Just how much have you been drinking old man?"

The questions and commentary fly from all around me but I don't care. All I care is that we're going to do this. We're going to try and rescue Madge's family.

"Settle down. Let's split into teams and then your team leaders can advise you of how this will all play out." Haymitch says rubbing his forehead. His annoyance obvious with the group before him.

I'm on Haymitch's team of course. Our focus is on the mission of getting Madge's father out. Counting myself and Haymitch, we're a team of 5. It's small but maybe that's better than having too many people involved. Once we're all sorted, seated and giving Haymitch our full attention, I finally get to hear the details of the plan.

"Kiddo here had the bright idea of faking Undersee's death and saving him as they dispose of the body. It's far reaching but it is possible. Sal here is from Apothecary. He'll get us started by explaining how the whole fake death will work." Haymitch explains, turning it over to the scrawny looking man with the lab coat on.

Sal clears his throat and begins speaking. "We're creating a faux-lethal medication that will be provided in pill form. One small tablet which can be dissolved under the tongue in a matter of seconds. Once it hits the bloodstream, it slows all the functions of the body to a nearly undetectable levels. The heartbeat, the breathing, the body temperature will all mimic that of someone who is deceased."

"Just how long will this medication be effective?"

"We hope to give it a half life of 12 hours. We need it to have at least 9 for it to be successful."

"What's half life?" I ask, not understanding his terms.

"When the effects of the drug peak and then begin to wear off."

"What happens then?" A man on the team whose name I can't remember asks. Sawyer I think.

"He'll begin to wake up slowly. His vitals will become detecable and he'll eventually wake feeling groggy and perhaps with a bit of a headache but should be fine otherwise."

"So we'll have only 9-12 hours to pull this off?" I ask.

"If we're lucky, yes." Haymitch interjects.

"Is the pill ready yet? Did you already have something like this on hand?" I ask Sal.

"We've compounded a few things and are proceeding with tests right now. We'll know by morning exactly how much time the pill will allow us. We already know the pill will work. The testing is to identify the timeline we're working with."

"And how do we get the pill to Mayor Undersee?" I ask.

"Our undercover Peacekeeper will slip it to him as they take him in for his round of daily torture. We hope this will make it appear that he's died from the torture itself, therefore making the whole thing look less suspicious than if they found him dead in his cell."

"How can we be certain that they'll dispose of the body right away? What if they just leave it there for awhile? What happens then?"

"We fail." Haymitch says somberly. "There are several key points that of they fail to occur precisely as we anticipate them, the whole mission fails. We need the pill to work on cue, the body to be picked up and transported, the route the transport vehicle travels even. Everything has to be damn near perfect."

"And what do we get for it?" Argan, a guy I've not really talked with much before, asks with a raised eyebrow.

"The satisfaction of pissing of Snow. The joy of doing a good deed. The thrill of pulling off a tough mission. Take your pick, doesn't matter to me what your motives are, just need your cooperation."

"Point taken." Argan says, settling back into his seat a little.

"Now that we have the medical part out of the way, let's move on too discuss the part where we move in." Haymitch begins. "The transport vehicle will have two drivers. We're trying to arrange for at least one of those guys to be our insiders. If that happens, we'll have to take him with us too. Can't leave him behind to take the fall for a missing body. We'll wait for the vehicle to hit the rendezvous point and then we stop the vehicle, take the body and insider if necessary and then haul ass back here to 13 where I suppose we'll then all live happily ever after."

"Who gets to do what?" I ask, anxious to know what role I can play in this whole thing.

"Don't go getting to eager on us kiddo, you'll have plenty to do but it won't be on that hovercraft if that's what you're asking."

"Oh come on, I can do this. This whole thing was my idea!" I begin to argue.

"You can be just as important to the mission here in 13. Your face is too recognizable, having you out there would make the whole thing riskier than it already is."

"So what, I get stuck on research and paperwork?" I ask, anger not the least bit hidden in my voice. I want to be a bigger part of this.

"Who said anything about research and paperwork?" Haymitch asks, his own voice bordering anger.

"I just want to be as involved as I can be. It's personal for me you know." I try to explain.

"I think we've covered all we can tonight. We'll reconvene after breakfast in the morning and get the roles assigned and start prep work." Haymitch says as the group stands to leave. When I stand to follow, Haymitch stops me.

"Hold up a sec there kiddo." He says as he puts a hand on my shoulder. Once the rest of the group is gone, he turns to me and gives me a look that tells me to keep my mouth shut.

"I'll make this fast. Let's get one thing straight. You have a role in this mission. It may not be the one you want, but that doesn't make it any less crucial."

"What's that role exactly?" I interrupt even though I know he only wants silence from me right now.

"I was planning on using you here, in the control room, with communications."

"Aww, come on! Communications? That's what you think I'd be good at? We both know that's a crock!"

"You can't be seen. Plain and simple. This aint a mission into any old district. It's a mission into the Capitol. Snow's playground if you will. One citizen getting one look at that face of yours and our whole plan will be in shambles. And you won't make it back outta there alive, I promise you that."

"I can't stay behind. I just can't This is way too important." I insist.

He glares at me.

"Come on Haymitch. There has to be something better I can do. Let me stay on the hovercraft. I won't get off. I'll be like back up or something. Please, you have to let me be a part of this."

"Let me think about it."

"Seriously, you have to let me…"

"In the morning. End of discussion." He says as he walks out of the room.

There's no way I can go to sleep right now. No freaking way. I'm too riled up. To ready to get going on this. To ready to bring Madge's family home to her. I'm halfway home to our place ready to share every detail of all this with Madge when I realize it still may not be a good idea to tell her about this. Something could still go wrong. But how can I not share this with her? How on earth can I keep it a secret? It'd been all I could do to not spill to her earlier when Haymitch sent for me. And she knows very well that something's up. I can't go back home yet. Not now. Not until I'm sure I should either keep it all a big secret or go ahead and tell her. I've gotta think this out for a bit first.

I head over to Medical to see Katniss. I haven't seen her at all today and I figure she probably isn't asleep. I peek through her room window and see that she's flipping through a book, not looking all that interested in it. I knock once as I enter the room without waiting for her to invite me inside.

"What the hell are you doing here at this hour?" She asks as I plop down in the chair next to her and kick my feet up on the bed.

"What? I can't come visit?"

"You can visit. Course most people do that during the daytime."

"Am I keeping you from some reading?" I tease, gesturing at the book she's already tossed aside.

"This isn't mine. I was just bored and thought I'd give it a try."

"Any good?"

"Incredibly difficult to understand and doesn't make a lick of sense to me." She admits.

"Who's is it?"

"Peeta left it here earlier. Said he borrowed it from Rory."

"Rory? Lemme see that." I say as I reach over and grab the book off her bed. "I've seen this before. It's not Rory's really. He borrowed it from Madge back in 12." I tell her as I run my finger over the cover of the book. A Midsummer Night's Dream by William Shakespeare. It's the one I took the quote from. The one that made me think of Madge. Find though she be but little she is fierce.

"It's not that terrible. Got some good stuff in it."

"You read this book?" She asks skeptically.

I shrug. "Skimmed it a little while Madge was in the games. Rory left it at my house one night. I wonder how he got it here though."

"Must've had it on him when he came in."

"Must have." I say as I look at the book. Why did he hold on to this for so long and not tell me? I had no clue he'd made it out of 12 with anything other than the clothes on his back.

"So what are you really doing here Gale? Kinda late for a visit."

"Just left work. Didn't want to go home yet because I wasn't sure if I want to tell Madge about the new mission or not."

"New mission? Do tell. I need a little excitement in my life right now." She says leaning forward.

"Just a little plan to rescue Mayor Undersee. Oh and Mrs. Undersee and Mabel too." I divulge with a grin. If anyone can understand the feeling you get before a mission, it's Katniss.

Her mouth falls open and she cocks her head to the side a bit. "You seriously sat her chatting about some stupid book for five minutes when you held that kind of information? Geez."

I shrug and give her a guilty grin.

"Well now you have to give me details. Real details!"

"We're gonna slip Mayor Undersee a pill to make him appear dead only he'll really just be incredibly knocked out. We're gonna get him when they transfer the body for disposal."

"Wow." She says, stunned. Neither of us thought this mission was possible. Neither of us expected him to be rescued.

"And they're gonna get Mabel and Mrs. Undersee too so that Snow can't turn his torture on them. Madge is getting her whole family back!"

"That's incredible Gale. It really, really is." She tells me. Her voice is genuine but I see a hint of something else in her eyes. Sadness maybe. And then it hits me. It's sadness not for herself but for Peeta. Peeta who wasn't lucky enough to have his family rescued.

"I'm sorry about Peeta's family. I didn't know until today what had happened to them."

"He didn't exactly want everyone to know about it. Makes it that much harder when you feel like everyone's looking at you with pity. He wanted to be able to grieve in private."

"How long have you known?"

"Since it happened. I was the one who told him about it." She says quietly.

"Is he okay?"

"He's handled it better than most people would. He's like that though. Tougher than he appears."

"Yeah, he must be." I agree. And I mean it. There's no way I'd ever be able to go about my day as if I was fine with that kind of thing weighing me down on the inside. He's definitely tougher than I would've guessed.

"I took your advice and finally told him that I love him." She confesses quietly.

I look up at her in surprise. "You did?"

She smiles a little and nods. "Mmhmm."

"So Catnip went and fell in love with a townie, just like me." I tease lightheartedly.

"That she did." She says with a roll of her eyes. "He's really something and it's hard for me to admit how I feel and get all mushy about it but after I thought about what you said and I thought about how happy you are with loving Madge, I figured I'd just go for it."

"And are you glad you did?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Well good."

"You should tell Madge about the mission. She'll be mad if you don't. And she might want some time to gather her thoughts before she comes face to face with her family after being away from them for so long. Just tell her."

"Yeah, you're probably right. I really want too. Just wasn't sure if it was a good idea or not."

"If it were me, I'd want to know, even if it was going to be a long shot. Having hope is good thing, you know?"

"Yeah. Hey, mind if I borrow this book? Let Madge see it again?"

"Be my guest. I have no intentions of reading it." She says shoving the book towards me.

"Thanks. Get some sleep Catnip, I'll see ya later."

"You'd better bring me mission details tomorrow!" She calls after me as I exit her room.

I head up home, book in hand, ready to give the love of my life back hope she'd thought was forever lost. And I can only hope I'm making the right decision. When I enter our place I expect to find her pacing the room but instead she's asleep. From the looks of it though, she did wait up for me quite awhile. She's not under the covers but rather on top of them and she's propped up on pillows as if she fell asleep while waiting. I hate to wake her because she looks so peaceful but I promised I would as soon as I got home so I do.

"Hey beautiful, I'm home. Wake up." I whisper in her ear as I kiss her temple.

"What time is it?" She asks through a yawn as she wakes up, rubbing her eyes.

"Really late. If you're tired we can just go to sleep. Talk in the morning if you want." I say softly, kissing her face again.

"No. I'm up. I want to know what's going on." She tells me shaking her head and sitting up to face me.

I pull her close to me and kiss the tip of her nose. "Okay, first, I have something for you though." I tell her as I hold up the book between us for her to see. She stares at it for a few moments, her lips slightly parted. And then she reaches for it, gingerly taking it out of my hands as if it were a delicate treasure. I watch as she silently turns the pages of it, looking it over, touching it, staring at it.

"This is my book...the one I lent Rory." She says at whisper level. Her eyes close and a single tear slips down her cheek. "It's the one you quoted from the night before the games started."

It takes a second for it to sink in. The words she just spoke. And when they do register, I find myself at a complete loss for words. I've waited so long for this moment that I'd almost given up on thinking it would ever happen. I grab her, pulling her to me, kissing her with maddening passion. Madge remembers.


	28. Chapter 28

**Chapter 28**

(Madge POV)

It hits me with a rush. So much so it leaves my head aching and my heart weeping with joy. One moment we're just sitting here talking and the next, Gale's holding out my book and everything comes flooding back to me. Literally, everything. All the memories, all the forgotten moments. I close my eyes because it doesn't feel real to me and it's almost overwhelming. It's my book. The one I lent to Rory before I left for the games. The one that Gale found a quote in that he sent to me the night before the games began. Tears of happiness flood from my eyes and before I can open them again, Gale's hands fold around my arms and his lips cover mine. This kiss is so much more than just a kiss. It holds all the things that were missing, all the emotion, all the love that was temporarily forgotten.

"You remember." He breathes against my lips. "You remember."

I nod rapidly as the happiest of tears keep flowing down my cheeks. "Yes."

His lips press urgent kisses all over my face and his hands never release me from his grasp. When his face pulls back again, I see tears glistening in his own grey eyes.

"I don't know what happened. It was just…it was like all of a sudden…everything…it just hit me all at once. Like it was never gone. As if I'd never forgotten." I try to explain through the tears and the kisses.

"All of it? It's all back?" He asks, hope resonating in his voice and on his face.

"Everything." I tell him.

He holds me tightly against his chest and buries his face in my hair. "Oh my God. I've been waiting so long for this. Wanted you to have your memories back for so long now. It's almost too good to believe."

"It's real. Believe it. It's just like Ren said it might happen. An ordinary moment and then wham, everything gets woken up and all makes sense again." I gush.

We stare at one another, our faces mere inches apart, as we take in this moment. Both of us have waited for it. Longed for it. Prayed for it to come. And now, it's here. Everything has come full circle and we're both slightly at a loss as to what to think or say about it. I reach down to the book and flip through the pages until I find the quote Gale sent me. I dog-ear the corner of the page so I can always flip right to it. It'll always be my favorite.

"I never even thought that the book would bring back your memory. I just knew it was yours and wanted you to have it back."

"Where on earth did you find it?"

"Katniss had it in her room when I went to visit her tonight. She'd gotten it from Peeta who had borrowed it from Rory. And I have no clue how Rory managed to get it here to 13. Must've had it on him or something when we arrived and they let him keep it or something."

"You were with Katniss? I thought you'd been at work." I ask in confusion.

"No, I was at work but then I wasn't sure about some stuff and went to see Katniss before I came home."

"What stuff?" I ask as a feeling of dread begins to overtake my happiness.

"About a mission that's coming up. I wasn't sure if I should tell you about it yet because it's not fully developed and I didn't want to get your hopes up just in case something changes."

"What mission?"

"The one that could very well save your family. All of them. Your father, you mother, even Mabel. We're going to try and rescue them and bring them back here to 13."

"Alive?" I ask, stunned as I try to process what he just said. They're going to try and rescue my family? Hours earlier there was a plan in place to end my father's life and now they're trying to save him?

Gale smiles a little at my question. "Yeah, alive. It's a longshot, just as your rescue was and things might still not work out the way we want so try not to get your hopes up too high just yet, okay?" He says gently as his fingertips trail alongside my cheek.

"How? How are you going to manage that? I thought it was impossible to get to my father?"

"We found a loop hole sort of. Something we can try that gets us a tiny window of opportunity to grab him. We're going for it. We think we can do it. I think we can do it."

"And my mother and Mabel? You're getting them too?"

"Mmhmmm. There will be three simultaneous rescue missions occurring. One for each of them."

"Are you working one of them? You are aren't you?"

"I'm working on your father's rescue. Don't know what exactly my role is yet though. I may be here and I may be actually out there when we bring him in."

"You want to be there for it, don't you? That's what you've asked for?" I ask him even though I know him well enough to know what the answer is without having to ask the question.

"Yeah. I wanna be there. Want to help bring him home for you. Haymitch hasn't said yes yet though."

"It's not really safe to have you out there in the Capitol. What if someone sees you?"

"I know you're worried and I understand the risks are extra high when I get involved but I can't not be a part of this."

"I'd like to come to work with you tomorrow. I want to hear the details of the rescue plans firsthand. Can you arrange that for me?" I tell him. I have no idea if they'll let me come down there and be a part of the planning or not. Everything is so top secret when it comes to that part of 13. But if Gale's determined to do this mission, then I want to know every sorted detail of the plan.

"I'll talk to Haymitch. See what he says about it. It'll be his call, not mine. But Madge, you did hear what I said about not getting your hopes up? It's hard, I know, but it's really important that you try, okay?"

"I heard you and I'm fine. I just want to come down and hear details is all. And you never know, maybe I can be of some help with the planning."

"We'll leave it up to Haymitch but even if he lets you listen in on the planning under no circumstances are you helping out with this mission. It's way too dangerous for you to be a part of it."

"Gale, I'm only asking to come watch and listen. Nothing more, okay?"

"Okay. Just checking." He says leaning in and quickly kissing me.

"You should probably get some sleep. Bet you have a long day tomorrow and it's already really, really late." I tell him as I rest my forehead against his.

"Yeah. Probably so. Hard to think about sleeping right now though." He whispers back.

"Why's that?"

"Because you're so distracting." He says as he lays back on the bed, pulling me with him as his lips close in on mine.

"So this is my fault?" I tease as he continues kissing down my neck.

"Completely." He teases back, his voice muffled by my hair. His hands pulling my nightshirt upward. I slip out of it and toss it aside. His hands pull me against him and he rolls us so that he's over me, staring down at me.

"I can't believe I have you back. All of you now. Every part of you."

"I was always yours, even the parts that couldn't remember for awhile." I whisper back to him just before we come together, consumed with need for one another. To be together, to feel whole again.

(Gale POV)

My fingers intertwine with hers as we lay entangled with one another beneath the blanket of our bed. To have her back with me, really, fully, one hundred percent cognitively with me, it's almost overwhelming and it feels more incredible than I ever imagined it would. She really, truly remembers us now. Every second we've had together, every thought she ever had, its all there.

"You should really get some sleep my love." I whisper when I realize that her eyes are still open and she's still awake.

"I'm scared to fall asleep." She whispers. "What if it goes away again? What if I wake up and it's all forgotten again?"

I pull back so I can look directly at her. There's a look of fear or panic or something of the both covering her face. "Hey, don't be scared about that." I tell her aloud, but in my head the same fear is now beginning to grow. What if she's right? What if this was a fluke thing and she goes to sleep with a perfectly functioning mind only to awake tomorrow with missing pieces again?

"I don't want that to happen again. I never want to feel that lost again, Gale. Never." She tells me, her chin quivering as tears begin to pool in the corners of her eyes.

"Well, here's what we do then. We get up and get dressed and we go down to Medical and have them check you out first." I say as I climb out of bed and start gathering our clothing from the floor.

"But it's the middle of the night." She protests.

"So what? You think those doctors of yours haven't been waiting on pins and needles for this moment? They'll be nearly as happy as we are that your memory's returned. Now c'mon, get dressed." I say as I toss her a pair of pants and top.

"But what if…" She begins.

"Madge stop it. We're going down there and that's all there is to it. I suggest you put some clothes on before I'm forced to drag you down there naked." I teasingly order her.

She scowls at me but climbs out of bed and begins dressing in the clothes I gave her. As we walk down to the Medical Center, we're quiet and I think it's from exhaustion, overwhelming emotion and the fear that it's all too good to be true. Too good to last.

I squeeze her hand, trying to reassure her but inside I recognize those same fears. Because if there's anything I've come to learn over the years, it's that when things are just as you want them, they never stay that way for very long. It's a cynical way of thought but a thought nonetheless. Hopefully, Madge's doctors will be able to put all our thoughts and fears to rest on the subject.

It's quiet in the Medical Center and the woman working the front desk seems surprised to see us.

"May I help you?" She asks, peering over her glasses at us.

"Yes'mam. This is Madge Hawthorne. She's a patient of Dr. Castellion and needs to speak with him right away." I explain.

"I'm afraid Dr. Castellion won't be in for several more hours. Is this an emergency? If so, you could speak with one of our doctors currently on duty."

"No, it needs to be Dr. Castellion. If you'll send for him, I'm certain he'll want to see her immediately." I insist. I know that Madge only wants her own doctor to reassure her right now. Someone who really knows her case. This night worker couldn't possibly understand that.

"If it's not an emergency, perhaps you could come back in the morning to meet with him when he's on duty?" She replies with reluctance.

"Mam, I'm from the Defense Department and I'm insisting you send for Dr. Castellion now, please." I tell her as I wave my badge in front of her.

She gives me a look but picks up her phone and murmurs into it, having a quiet conversation with whoever is on the other end of the line. When she hangs up the phone, she quietly clears her throat and then stands.

"Follow me." She says and leads us to an exam room.

"Dr. Castellion will be with you shortly." She says as she leaves the room, shutting the door behind her.

Once she's gone, Madge turns to me a gives me a look. "You shouldn't have done that Gale. This isn't official business."

"It's official to me." I shrug.

She gives me a look and I just shake my head at her. "Relax, would you? It's fine." I tell her as I pull her to sit down on my lap.

We don't wait long before a very tired looking Dr. Castellion and several of his staff appear before us, curiosity sparked by the middle of the night awakening.

"Mrs. Hawthorne, what seems to be the problem?"

"I'm terribly sorry to have disturbed you in the middle of the night and I do appreciate you coming down right away. My memory came back tonight and I just...I mean, it's silly but I wanted you to check me out before I fell asleep again just in case it disappears again." Madge explains apologetically.

"Your memory is back in its entirety?" He asks her, his eyes looking much more awake now.

"Yes. It came back suddenly and all at once. Just a little while ago."

"Well this is excellent progress Mrs. Hawthorne. And you made the right decision in coming to see me right away. I'd like to conduct a full exam and evaluation. Your case is one of much value to the medical profession and I think it's important that we document everything."

"You want to do the evaluation right away?"

"Yes, I think it's important. Shouldn't take more than a few hours and then we'll have you back home for some much needed rest."

"Gale, this is going to take awhile. Maybe you should go on home and go back to bed. You have work in the morning and there won't be anything for you to do here while they document everything."

"I don't mind waiting for you." I tell her.

She shakes her head. "I know but it's not necessary. You need to be rested for tomorrow. I'll see you later, okay?"

"Okay." I tell her, kissing her forehead and then her lips. "I love you."

"Love you too." She tells me with a smile that melts my heart.

I leave and head back home to get some sleep. I only have a few hours until I need to be back at work and I'm completely exhausted. I let myself fall face first into our bed and I'm asleep before my face even hits the pillow I think. When I wake up, it's from someone pounding at my door. I stumble out of bed and open the door to find one very serious looking Haymitch waiting for me.

"Sorry to wake ya kiddo but I need ya to come with me right away."

I glance at the clock and it's still half an hour before I was supposed to wake up so I haven't overslept or anything. "Something going on?" I ask in alarm.

"I'm sending you out on a mission and it's gotta happen right now."

"What?" I ask in astonishment as I hurry alongside him down to the elevator.

"Rescue mission to 12 to check for survivors. We've got an unexpected window and we have to move now. You know those woods around 12 like the back of your hand so it has to be you." He explains once we're alone in the elevator and on our way to Defense.

"I can't go anywhere without talking to Madge." I tell him.

"You have to kid. We received word that satellites were down temporarily because of some storm they had near 12. It's our chance to fly a craft in there and rescue anyone who's managed to hang on waiting for us. We don't have time for you to go clear things with the Mrs."

"No, you don't understand. I'll go, it's fine. But I have to talk to her. I have to say goodbye to her first."

"You got mud in those ears of yours kid? Are you not hearing me? The time to move is now." He barks at me as we enter the Defense Department where a whole team of people are waiting for me.

I freeze in my tracks. There is absolutely no way I'm leaving without talking to Madge. She has to know where I'm at and what I'm doing.

"Look, I'll send for her. I'll let her sit and listen in from the Communications Bay so she knows what's going on but in the meantime, I need you to move your ass!"

My mind is all over the place as I feel myself getting shuffled towards the loading dock where a hovercraft is already waiting. This is so much to take in at once.

"You'll have to get dressed during flight. No time for it now." A man says as he shoves an armload of gear at me.

"Your Pilot and Communicator are already aboard doing their preflight work. We don't have time for me to say this twice so listen up. When you land you'll be in the woods just outside of 12. It's the only place where we believe there may still be survivors. You are to search the surrounding area of the woods only. Do not for any reason go into the actual district. Wear all of the protective gear, even if you think you don't need it."

I nod and taking in his instructions before adding "She's in the Medical Center. You'll go get her and keep her in the Communication Bay the whole time, right?"

"I'll send for her right now. Make sure she knows how much of a stink you threw up about leaving without seeing her first." He says with an annoyed huff. He understands, but he's no less annoyed with me right now.

I climb aboard the craft and start pulling on my gear as I hear door close behind me and the engine roar to life. I swallow down the guilt I feel about not saying goodbye to Madge because I can't think about it right now. Right now, I just need to get geared up and get my mind ready to complete this mission. I feel us begin to move and the communicator hands me a headset.

"Haymitch wants to give you more instructions." He says before turning back to his control panel.

I slip the headset on and instantly hear Haymitch's voice crackle in my ears. "Hawthorne? You there?"

"Yeah, go ahead with instruction."

"You'll have about an hour to search the ground for survivors. Don't take extra time down there because truth is we just don't have it to spend. Cover what ground you can in that time. Our intelligence tells us that there's a only a slim chance you'll find anyone still alive. At best your craft can bring back 50 but there's no way you'll find that many so don't worry about that. Be prepared to find remains but leave them be if you do. We don't have medical on your craft because there just wasn't time to round them up. If you need it, there's a first aid kit aboard that you'll have to make do with until you can get back here and Medical can take over. All said, you should be back home, mission completed within a few hours."

"Understood. Did you send for Madge yet? Is she on her way?"

"Princess is on her way."

Relief washes over me. "Thanks, I appreciate that." I hand the headset back over to the Communications guy and finish gearing up.

Now that I know Madge has been sent for I need to really focus on the task at hand. I can do this. I know those woods through and through. If there's anyone out there still hanging on, waiting to be rescued, I'll find them. I'll find them and bring them back to safety. And then I can get back to work on getting Madge's family back for her. I can do this.

_**A/N: I love, love, loved all your messages and reviews with excitement over the return of Madge's memory! Thanks so much for the enthusiasm you guys!**_


	29. Chapter 29

**Chapter 29**

(Madge POV)

I fidgit about, swiveling my chair from side to side anxiously until Haymitch reaches over and grabs hold of it, stilling me.

"Sorry. Just antsy." I apologize, not meeting his gaze because I'm certain it holds a glare.

I've been sitting here for the last hour trying to be patient as I listen in on the mission. The mission that Gale had gone out on without getting the chance to say goodbye to me first. I'd been a touch angry about it initially but Haymitch insisted that Gale wasn't given a choice. He swore to me that Gale was literally shoved onto the hovercraft moments before it took off. Deciding that Haymitch isn't the kind of person to say things that aren't true, I believe him and let my rising anger subside. And I've apparently replaced it with anxiety.

"Alpha Bravo Charlie 1, approaching zone, landing in .1." I hear a male's voice crackle through the speakers. I have no idea what it means other than it seems the craft is landing. A lot of what I've heard on here is a bunch of flight jargon that I can't understand. Wind speeds and coordinates, stuff like that. But the word landing is one I understand. Landing means that they've arrived in the woods outside of 12 and for the next hour Gale will be searching there for possible survivors. This is the point at which I'll be holding my breath. This is the part that scares me most. The part when he's out in the woods, totally alone and in my opinion, unprotected.

I focus my eyes on the clock hanging on the wall. It's 5:42 in the morning. I'm told that he has exactly one hour on the ground before they head back. All he has to do is make it back safely within the next hour and then they'll bring him straight back here to me. I watch as the second hand on the clock ticks in a painfully slow fashion. This is going to be one of the longest hours of my life.

But I suppose that it makes for good practice. Gale is so dead set on being a part of the mission to rescue my father and that mission will be increasingly more difficult and dangerous than the one he's on now. I should probably work on getting my head and heart ready to handle such a thing. If I feel anxious now, I'm certain I'll be a complete basket case while that mission is taking place.

"Runner active. Systems off 55 counting down." The crackling voice says.

"Systems off? What does that mean?" I ask Haymitch. I haven't been bothering him to give me explanations of what comes through the speakers but that one sounded as if they were shutting down the hovercraft.

"It's safer this way. Even though the Capitol satellites are down, we want our craft to power down while on the ground just in case their systems get up and running before we get out of there."

"So if the hovercraft systems are off, the Capitol can pick us up on their radar?"

"Nope. They only catch our signals when we're powered up or in movement."

"So they can see when we're flying? They can catch us midflight?" I ask in horror as images of Gale's hovercraft being shot down flash through my mind.

"They could. We've got special technology that scrambles our flight signals though so even if they identify an unauthorized aircraft on the radar, they won't be able to determine our coordinates or our flight path. By the time they could possibly unscramble the signals, we'd be off their radar again." Haymitch explains.

"Oh." Is all I manage to say in response. But then I have more questions. "But how do we know what's coming at us if our systems are down? And what if we needed to fly suddenly?"

"We can power up enough systems to fly out in just under 30 seconds if need be. And as for seeing what's coming at us, we do that third party, here in the Communications Bay."

"But that doesn't make any sense. Even if we saw a Capitol Hovercraft coming directly at ours, with the systems powered down we wouldn't be able to alert our people. All we could do is sit by and watch."

"Look Princess, you're really wearing on my headache here. I did your boy a favor by letting you sit in here but please, for the love, could stop with the panicky questions? Some of us are actually working here." Haymitch tells me with the most exasperated of sighs as he rubs his forehead, eyes squinted shut.

I shut up and try to make myself as invisible as possible. He pulls a small flask from his pocket and pours a clear liquid into his coffee mug. I can smell from here that it's moonshine. I remember it well from when Gale took to drinking it just before I was reaped. Haymitch has long since been known as a drunk. I figure the games are what did it to him, what drove him to it. That's partly why it worried me back when I first noticed Gale had begun drinking. I was afraid he'd take it to the extreme like Haymitch. Thankfully, he never let it get out of control and he dropped the habit altogether once we were reunited here in 13. Looking back on it all now though, it's a wonder he didn't drink more often while he patiently waited for my memory to return. It'd been awful for him. I know it was. And now that I have my memory back, all I want to do is make it up to him. To thank him for being so loving, so patient beyond belief. Yes, I definitely need to thank him in my own special way.

My daydreaming about Gale is interrupted by one of the workers. "Excuse me mam, I need to access that screen." He says politely while gesturing to the screen in front of my chair.

"Of course." I say as I hop out of the chair and move back to get out of his way. I watch as he touches the screen and it changes pulling up new images and data. His brow furrows and he touches a few more spots on the screen, making it zoom in on a blinking dot.

"We've got activity in sector F. Requesting identification of flight path." He says calmly into the headset that he's wearing. My heart rate quickens when I hear this. It sounds concerning even though his voice is calm as he speaks.

"Flight path showing as 3.55 and 88.92 with destination of 11. Registered flight on Capitol Roster." A woman's voice rings back through his headset but it's loud enough that I can hear it clearly.

"Requesting notification should that flight path change at any time." The man says back into the headset. He sits back and keeps the zoomed in section of the screen pulled up in front of him.

"Copy." The female voice says again.

I look over at Haymitch and see that he's busy reading over something that just printed out from the machine next to him. I'm literally dying to know what exactly is going on but hesitant to ask any more questions for fear that Haymitch will kick me out of here altogether. I begin to fidget with a loose thread on the hem of my shirt and shift my weight from one foot to the other then back again. My eyes turn to the clock on the wall again. 6:22. Almost finished. Only 20 more minutes and Gale will be safely back on the hovercraft and heading back to me.

The man with the headset must notice me fidgeting behind him because he turns around, glancing at me. I think I must be disturbing his concentration so I mouth the words "I'm sorry" to him and force myself to remain still, folding my arms over my chest tightly.

"It's okay. Here, pull up that chair and I'll explain what's going on. This is all pretty foreign to you." He says with a smile.

"Are you sure? I don't want to disturb you."

"It's no problem." He says as I take a seat. "Sawyer." He says holding out his hand to me.

"Madge Hawthorne." I say as I give his hand a shake.

He stifles a little laugh. "We all know who you are down here."

I blush a little, unsure if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Has Gale been talking me up to his coworkers? What could he have said?

"I worked the communications for the mission that brought you here." He explains.

"Oh, I didn't know. Thank you. Thank you very much!" I tell him, feeling as if I should have known this about him.

He shrugs as if it were nothing. "So, what we have here is a screen of all of Panem. It's divided up into sectors and in each of those, we can zoom in and see all signal producing activity."

"Signal producing?" I ask, trying to understand what he means.

"Trains, hovercrafts, official vehicles. Anything like that."

I nod and he continues. "My job is to watch for movement near the areas of our own hovercrafts during a mission. If I see anything, I call up to Lucie, she works the database that taps into the Capitol's database, and she identifies for me what I see. That helps me determine if it's anything to be concerned about or not."

"And then what happens? If you're concerned, I mean."

"I call the information over to the team leader. He evaluates and gives direction from there."

"And what you saw earlier, it was nothing to be concerned about?" I ask.

"It's what I consider to be marginal. It's a registered flight which means it was pre-planned. That makes it highly unlikely that it's coming after our craft. But because it's in a reasonable range to our craft, I'm having Lucie keep an eye on it to see if it logs a change of course."

"Just how close is it to where Gale's at?"

He smiles and that puts me more at ease. "Close, but believe me, if it were something to be concerned about, we wouldn't be sitting here having a tutorial about how things work in the Communications Bay. I'd be far too busy for that."

"Of course. I just get nervous when he's out there is all." I explain, hoping that my anxiousness isn't annoying him.

"Understandable." He turns his attention back to the screen, zooming in on a few areas but then closing them back out when he doesn't see anything of concern. As I watch him work, I'm glad he was kind enough to explain the gist of things to me so that I could understand what's occurring. Well, moderately understand it anyway.

I glance at the clock again. 6:35. Gale should be back to the hovercraft very soon now. 7 minutes until he's back aboard and only 5 minutes until they power up the hovercraft again. I take a deep breath and try to relax. I'm being ridiculous. Gale's fine. He's in the woods of 12 for crying out loud. He knows that area inside and out. He's good at this. I'm a worried mess for nothing. I've got to learn how to better control this anxiety. Even the people in this room are relaxed and they know everything there is to know about the mission at hand. If they can be calm, I must learn how to be calm about this too.

"Alpha. Bravo. Charlie. Systems powering up. Preflight procedures in progress. Take off in 5." Crackles through the speaker.

"Total aboard?" A man just a few chairs down from me asks.

"2 currently aboard." The crackling voice confirms.

"Update total count prior to take off."

"Copy."

Only 2 aboard? That means Gale isn't back yet. Crap. I was really hoping he would already be back. Why isn't he back? Why would he cut it so damn close? All of a sudden I remember what he said would happen on his last mission if he didn't make it back to the hovercraft in time. They would leave him out there to fend for himself. He'd be stranded until they could come back for him. Oh please don't let that happen!

"He still has time to get back." Sawyer says in a quiet but reassuring voice. He must sense my uneasiness.

I inhale deeply and nod at him with a grateful smile. The next few minutes may as well be hours for as long as they feel. I do my best to keep the fidgeting to a minimum though I'm unsuccessful but if it bothers Sawyer, he doesn't show it. I'll have to be sure Gale knows how kind Sawyer has been to me this morning. I know he'd appreciate it.

"Alpha. Bravo. Charlie. Updated count of 6 aboard. Taking off in .1."

"Copy."

My whole body relaxes. The updated count means that Gale did make it back on time and that he also managed to find survivors! This is absolutely fantastic! Sawyer and I exchange smiles.

"Requesting change of flight path. Code 6."

"Standby by for new path coordinates."

"What's a code 6?" I whisper to Sawyer as panic begins to creep back over me.

"Means they've hit a patch of bad weather. Like a thunderstorm or something. They're just requesting to move around the storm instead of moving through it." He explains. His voice is still calm but I notice the muscles of his jaw look a little tighter. He touches his computer screen and zooms in over an area. "All clear for flight path change." He calls out to the other workers in the room.

"Approved for flight path change. New coordinates are 3.55 and 44.86."

"Copy. Proceeding with…" The speaker crackles and then there's a sound of feedback causing my hands to fly up and cover my ears.

"Alpha. Bravo. Charlie. Repeat last communication." A worker calls out.

And then we have nothing but silence. Dead silence. A silence so loud that I can hear my heart thudding in my ears. They aren't responding.

"Alpha. Bravo. Charlie. Repeat last communication." The worker repeats.

Again we wait for them to respond. It's complete silence. Erie silence throughout the entire room.

"What do we show on radar? Do we have their position?" Haymitch barks, springing into action.

"They have not changed flight paths according to what our system shows." Sawyer responds. "I don't show movement though."

He doesn't show movement? What the hell does that mean? What just happened? The entire room is now a flurry of commotion as everyone works furiously at whatever their task is. The one worker continues to ask for them to repeat their communications. Sawyer is busy touching all over his screen, searching and zooming in at different sectors. Someone is checking weather patterns. All I can do is panic silently and try to stay out of everyone's way.

(Gale POV)

The cold air hits me all the way to my bones as I jump out of the hovercraft. I'd forgotten just how cold winters got around here. Being underground for so long, you just tend to forget about that sort of thing. My feet slosh across the ground, mud splashing as I run. The storm that blew through here must have really been a big one because a lot of trees and branches are down and the ground is soaked through. One glance up at the sky and I can tell another storm is heading this way. All the clouds are heavy and grey.

I'm not really certain how to go about looking for survivors but I decide to make a perimeter loop around as big an area as I can in the time that I have. I'll work my way outward and then I'll spiral back inward towards where the hovercraft is. We've landed not far from the edge of 12. Or well, the remains of 12 anyway. Haymitch had been very specific about my not crossing the fence back into the district itself. I was to stay in the woods only. Because it's winter and the trees are mostly bare, I get just a glimpse of the very edge of 12 on the Seam side as I reach the outermost part of the loop I'm making. The fence is still there but it's destroyed and twisted in sections, obviously it wouldn't be on. There aren't any houses standing like they should be. Not that anyone could expect a Seam house to withstand the wrath of the Capitol. Much of the grass in the field between the treeline of the woods and the fence is blackened from having burned. I want more than anything to go, to walk through 12 and see it as it is now but I know I don't have time. And I know if I expect Haymitch to let me work the mission to save Madge's father, I'd better do exactly what he tells me to do on this mission.

As I move through the woods, I watch for things that show signs of life. The first half hour or so, I don't see anything but as I work my way back inward towards where I began, I notice lots of trees with lower branches missing. Only the lower, reachable branches. That tells me that someone broke them off. Likely for firewood or shelter. I slow my run and look more closely. The storm that ripped through has made it impossible to see any footprints or tracks. And while tracks would be easily spotted in the mud, the storm just happened and I doubt anyone would be out just yet. I don't smell smoke or fire but I doubt any fire that could have been burning would've survived the storm. Not an outdoor fire.

I keep walking, looking for anything that could lead me to people and come upon small stones laid one by one in a row with a little space between each one. A quick count tells me it's 13 stones. The ground is only muddy. No grass or leaves cover the ground around the stones like it does everywhere else. These were definitely placed intentionally. And somewhat recently. But why? Are they some sort of route marker? A signal of sorts? And then it hits me. They aren't route markers. These are grave markers. A sickening feeling rolls through me and I take a couple steps backward so I'm not standing on them. Someone is definitely alive out here. Or was recently. And my time is running out, I've got to hurry and find them because this is the only chance of rescue they're going to have.

My gut tells me to call out but at the same time I don't want too because I don't know who is out here. I doubt it's anyone Capitol related but whoever is out here, isn't expecting me to be here and I don't want to scare anyone off or panic anyone into attacking me. All I want is to find them and haul ass back to 13 as fast as I can. I have less than 10 minutes and I know I need to get back because they will leave me here if I don't return.

I scan around, desperate to see anything that would give away signs of life. Nothing. I'm making my way back to the hovercraft, eyes still peeled on my surroundings. Maybe I can convince them to pull another mission out here and I can come back and look again. Yes, that's what I'll have to do. I'll have to tell Haymitch what I found and beg him for a second chance at this.

I'm 7 minutes away from the craft when I spot it. The makeshift shelter amongst a cluster of trees. Branches wedged together and covered with leaves. I swallow. Do I call out? Do I go up to it? Who is in there? I cautiously approach and pause when I'm about 3 feet away from it.

"Hello? Is anyone there? I'm here to help you." I call out.

I hear a rustling noise from inside but no one answers. I call out a second time. "I'm not here to hurt you. I'm here to help."

Again, no one responds. I have less than 6 minutes to get them out of here and back to the hovercraft. I don't have time for this. I go right up to the shelter and knock away some of the logs and branches. My eyes fall on a blanket of pine needles nearly knee high. Like some sort of giant nest. No people though. But I know I heard someone in here so I start brushing away the pine needles. They have to be buried under here, whoever they are. And then I find them. Three people. A woman and her two children. Her eyes are wide with absolute fear as soon as I uncover them but then her face relaxes. She recognizes me. I don't know her. They appear to be Seam people though.

"I'm Gale Hawthorne and I've come to rescue you all but you have to come with me right now or we'll all be stranded out here. I can explain later but for now, I just need you to come with me!" I tell her as calmly as my adrenaline filled body will let me.

She sits up and nods. She looks weak and the children even worse. "We've been waiting for so long." She says, her voice scratchy and dry.

"I need you to carry your smaller boy. I'll carry the older one. And we need to run. They will leave without us if we don't hurry." I tell her, urgently pulling her to her feet. I shove her smallest child into her hands and grab the other one into my own arms and begin to run. I glance back only once to see if she's following and keeping up. She is. She's struggling, but fear and desperation must be driving her because somehow, she's right behind me.

When the hovercraft is finally in sight, I see it's already powered up and ready to take off. We're literally cutting it seconds close again. I toss the boy I'm carrying through the door and then help hoist her and the smaller child up and in, throwing myself through just behind them.

I close the door just as we lift off and lean against it in total exhaustion. I hear the communicator give our passenger count to 13. I did it. I saved 3 lives today. I look over to where the woman is huddled on the floor with her two children and stare at them. They look almost wild. Dirty, matted hair. Skin so filthy there isn't a bare spot of flesh visible. Layers of tattered, mix-matched and ill fitting clothing on all of them. Probably clothing they pulled off of those they buried. A means of attempted survival against the bitter cold. They're frail and their faces gaunt. They're obviously starving.

I sit up, reaching for the first aid kit. I know it has water in it and it may have some sort of food or something. But as I reach for the kit the craft turns sharply and I have to brace myself. It's a turbulent ride, probably from the storm and I hear the request going out to change our flight path. I realize I should probably help get the woman and her kids strapped into seats.

"Let's get you guys buckled up. The storm's making our flight a little choppy." I say, hoping they aren't too scared right now. I remember my flight to 13 and how scared I'd been, not understanding what was going on.

"Where are we going?" The woman asks. Her voice still so dry and rough sounding. As soon as I get them settled into seats, I need to find that water for them.

"To safety. I promise everything is going to be okay now." I tell her knowing the full explanation of Underground 13 is too much to go into right now.

She seems to trust me but doesn't say anything else. Her hands holding tightly to each of her children. Just as I latch the last harness on them, the whole craft plummets and I fall backward, banging my back against a row of seats behind me.. We level off again and I pull myself to my feet. Stupid storm I think as I rub my now aching back. I decide the water will have to wait and that I need to get my own self strapped into a seat before I get really hurt. I'm untangling the harness when it happens. The whole craft shakes violently, knocking me out of the seat and onto the floor. I slide across the floor, hitting against equipment as I do. The shaking continues and the lights flicker off and on before they stay off altogether. It's completely dark. Can't see my hand in front of my own face. In the pitch darkness I hear a sizzling sound from the control panels, see a flash of blue sparks and then pitch blackness again. I hear the woman and her children crying out in fear and hear panic in the voices of the pilot and communicator as they try to fix whatever just happened. And all I can think is that Madge will never forgive me for this. I left without saying goodbye and if I don't make it back to her, if we crash, I can't…I can't even think about what this will do to her. I should have told her I was leaving. I should have told her I loved her.

_**A/N: Fanpire109, this is what you've been waiting for! Thanks for the idea and the patience while I put it all together. I hope to have the next chapter up soon!**_


	30. Chapter 30

**Chapter 30**

(Madge POV)

I'm holding so tightly to the arm of the chair that my knuckles have gone white. The room is still all a frenzy with commotion and there still hasn't been any response from Gale's hovercraft. It's been nearly ten minutes and they still aren't able to locate them on the radar system. Everything around me is such a whirlwind that I can't catch full conversations, only bits of sentences filed with words I don't understand.

What the hell happened and where the hell are they at? Did they crash? Is it just a radar glitch from the bad weather? Please, please let that be all that's going on here. Please, please don't let them have crashed. Please let him be okay. He just has to be okay. He has to.

"We're approaching 15 minutes, no contact, no signals." Someone says.

"Let's give em 5 more and then we'll send out a searcher." Haymitch instructs.

"And keep your eyes on that damn radar screen. I wanna know if we pick up even a blip of activity anywhere in a 50 mile radius of where we last tracked them." He then orders to Sawyer who nods in response.

"You, get me a crew down here now. If we end up needing to send them out, I don't wanna have to wait for em." He barks at someone else. "And make sure we get a medic for that crew."

I see two different workers pick up handsets and begin putting in requests for a fresh crew to come down. I look over at Sawyer who is tapping away at his radar screen and sending up requests to Lucie. I wish there was something I could do to help. Anything at all. I don't think I've ever felt so helpless in my entire life. I sit and wait as the panicked feeling in the room continues around me.

"Where are we with medical? Are they sending someone?" Haymitch asks after his 5 minutes have come and gone.

"They said they'll send someone as soon as they can."

"Well when the hell will that be? Where are we with a pilot and a runner?"

"Already in the loading dock, awaiting green light."

"Call back and tell Medical that if they don't get me someone in the next 3 minutes, I'm going to come over there and get them myself!" Haymitch shouts.

He slams his fist down on the desk, rattling everything on it, swearing aloud to no one in particular. Two more people enter the room and immediately begin to question what happened with the mission. They both appear to be of the same type of position as Haymitch and the three of them begin to whisper in a sort of huddle together, making it impossible to eavesdrop on what's being said. This, plus the continued flurry of commotion in the room are making me even more anxiety riddled. My fingertips feel numb and my head feels like it's spinning. I close my eyes and try to take a few steady, deep breaths.

I open my eyes again only because I hear the command go out for the Searcher Crew to depart.

"Alright, give them the green light to go ahead. We won't wait for a medic if they haven't got anybody there yet. We've got people out there who need us and we can't wait." Haymitch orders.

A worker nods and relays the message over to the crew waiting at the loading dock. I look around the room and notice an eerie calm beginning to fill the space. All the workers are less frantic. The volume of voices, much lower. More people sitting, less standing. The mood is definitely shifting.

Sawyer turns and looks at me, then whispers. "A searcher crew will find them, bring them back."

I'm uncertain if he tells me this out of explanation's sake or out of a need to comfort me. Either way, it only mildly helps. I barely respond, giving him a half nod.

"You hanging in there okay?" He whispers, leaning a little closer.

"I just feel so helpless right now." I whisper back, tears threatening to spill over at any moment.

"You want to help? I could always use a second pair of eyes. Here, watch this screen, this area here. You see any blinking dots, of any color, let me know. Got it?" He instructs as he zooms the screen in for me.

I scoot my chair forward and focus on the screen. This is good. This will help me feel like I'm helping Gale and keep me from losing the battle I'm waging with my anxiety. "Thanks." I say quietly to Sawyer, my eyes still peeled on the screen.

He goes back to watching his own screen. I whisper to him once more. "Why did the mood shift in the room when the searcher crew left?"

He takes a moment to answer me. "Just a shift from unexpected chaos back to ordered process."

His answer would make perfect sense if I believed that really was all there was behind it. But I don't. This isn't just ordered process. This feels like they're already expecting the worst. Like they already think this will end badly.

"Alpha. Bravo. Charlie. 2. We're turning back. No way we can get through this storm." I hear come over the speaker.

"Copy."

What? They're stopping? They have to keep going!

"They'll go back again after the storm passes." Sawyer tells me as he leans in towards me.

"But what if he's hurt? What if we don't have time to wait for the storm to pass? They have to keep going!" I plead, all the while knowing he can't help me. It isn't his decision.

"Look princess, it's been great having ya down here but I think it'd be best if you skedaddled for now. I'll send for you again when we know something new." Haymitch cuts in before Sawyer can respond.

"No, I need to be here. I need to know what's going on. Please Haymitch, you have to tell them not to turn back, to keep going! Make them go around the storm if they have too but please just don't let them come back without at least looking!"

"No can do. Now I mean it, get on out of here and I'll send for you later. We've got work to do and there won't be anything for you to see in the meantime." He says as he grabs hold of my arm, pulling me to my feet. My resistance not fazing him one bit as he leads, or pulls me rather, me out of the room.

Once he has me out in the hall, he shuts the door leaving me alone and more frustrated than ever. I can't believe this is happening. I cannot believe it. I lean against the wall and let myself slide down to the floor. I pull my knees up to my chest and wrap my arms around my legs, chin on my knees. Haymitch might be able to make me leave the room but he can't make me go home. I'll sit right here and wait for as long as it takes.

(Gale POV)

Ow. My entire body aches. Something heavy is on me and I can't stand up. I feel rain pouring down on me. I open my eyes and look around but can't see anything for all the smoke. I hear coughing, someone must be choking on smoke. There's a baby crying I think. We just crashed. Yes, that's what happened. The storm was bad and we crashed.

"Hello? Everyone okay?" I yell through the smoke.

"We're over here! We're okay!" The woman, whose name I haven't even had a chance to learn yet calls out.

"I'm okay too! We need to get out of here, move away from the crash site." Tull, the communicator calls out to the group.

I expect to hear the pilot next but his voice never comes through the smoke. I try in vain to wriggle out from underneath whatever landed on top of me before calling out to Tull. "I'm gonna need some help getting up. Something has me pinned down pretty good."

He finds me and helps shove the hunk of metal away enough for me to escape it. "Come on, we need to get them out of here. Crashes draw attention and we don't have much time."

"The pilot?" I ask.

"No." He is all he says. I know that means he didn't survive the crash. I have no idea if the pilot and Tull were close. If they were friends or not but I know now isn't the time to think about that.

"Got it." I say as I ignore the throbbing in my legs, making my way through the smoke towards the sounds of the crying child.

We find them and help get them out of the harnesses. I take the crying kid and Tull takes the other. The woman holds tight to my hand as we climb out of the wreckage. Once we're far enough away from the crash site, I take a look at our surroundings. We're near the lake I think. If that's true, we could seek out shelter in the cabin. No, wait. That wouldn't be a good idea. If our crash attracted any Capitol attention, they'd find us too quickly at the cabin. The church is more hidden, a little further away.

"Look, I know the area. If I'm right about where we are, there's an old church, a place we can take shelter in. It's a bit of a walk though."

"Probably a good idea. Don't want to stay too close to the crash site in case unwanted company comes our way. But we have to think about how we'll be rescued too. They'll send out a searcher crew but I don't know how far out the crew will look for us and I don't know how soon they'll get here. Staying doesn't seem like a good plan though, not in this weather." He agrees.

"You guys okay enough to head through the woods?" I ask the woman.

She nods, not speaking. Her eyes look so weary. There's a cut on her cheek but it isn't too bad. Both kids appear shaken but not harmed. I nod back at her and we all begin walking. As we walk, my entire lower half is aching like crazy. A weird ache like I haven't felt before. I fight through it though, relying on my adrenaline to get me through this. The rain makes it difficult, soaking both us and the ground and we all jump every time the thunder booms overhead.

It turns out I was right about our location. We end up passing by the lake and cabin. At the cabin, we go inside for a minute to rest and I'm glad we do. Some of the things Madge and I left here will come in handy at the church. A couple blankets, some candles and a canister with a few matches. After our short break, we head for the church but not before I take a few seconds to scrawl a message using mud with my finger on the wall of the cabin. A clue for anyone from 13 looking for us. Just one word. Proposal. If the searcher crew finds the cabin, they'll see this and if they're smart enough to call it back to the communication bay, Madge will hear it. She'll know what it means. The church is where I proposed. She can tell them how to find it. If anyone else finds it, they won't know what it means and it won't give away our hiding spot.

Once we find the church, I can barely stand any longer. My legs ache. And strangely, my stomach is killing me too. We get inside and I practically collapse on the floor.

"You okay Hawthorne?" Tull asks looking at me with concern.

"Yeah, I think I'm just real sore from being tossed around the craft when we crashed. Wasn't strapped into my seat when it happened." I explain as I rub my hand over my ribs. Nothing feels broken. I must just be sore.

"Amazing you survived." He says quietly, almost as if to himself and I think back to the pilot we left behind. He must be thinking of him too.

"I'm June. This is Simon and the little one is Hank." The woman says gesturing to the children curled up against her: her voice still terribly scratchy.

"I'm Tull. This is Gale. We're from 13."

"I know who Gale is. Everyone knows him." She says in a tired voice. "But I didn't know about 13." She adds. Her eyes close and she leans her head back against one of the benches.

"What happened to you? How long were you in the woods?" I ask.

"We escaped to the woods when the bombings started. There were more of us in the beginning. We didn't know what to do, where to go. When we ran, we didn't take anything with us. There wasn't time. Between the elements and the hunger, we're all that's left of 12." She says, eyes still closed.

I'm freezing and these wet clothes aren't helping one bit. I look around. There isn't a fire place so I can't warm us up. I do need to get out of these clothes. And everyone else should get out of theirs too. But we can't sit here totally naked. We'll get sick. I get up, wincing at the pain in my stomach as I do. A quick survey of the church turns up a dusty old table cloth and not much else that could be of use. It isn't very thick but it's better than nothing.

"I think we should get out of these wet clothes. Try to let em air out a bit, see if they'll dry." I suggest. "You can wrap up in these blankets in the meantime." I add as I hand one blanket to June and one to Tull. I keep the tablecloth to use.

I peel off my clothes, only now noticing how ripped up they are. Sliding around that hovercraft really banged me up. My body already has it's fair share of purple bruises showing up. I wrap the tablecloth around my lower half and knot the corners together so it doesn't fall off. I'm still freezing but at least I'm not in wet clothes anymore. I wring out my clothes and hang them over one of the benches.

"So what do we do now?" June asks.

"We wait for the good people of 13 to find us. They'll know we crashed. They'll be coming for us. Soon." Tull tells her optimistically.

"You'll like 13. It's nice." I tell her as I ease back down to the floor, my breath sucking in as I get a searing pain across my stomach. What the hell did I do to myself? Had I pulled a muscle? Torn a muscle maybe? I've been banged up over the years a few times but I've never felt this rough before.

"I'm sure we will." She says as she huddles beneath the blanket with her kids. The youngest one is sleeping and the other one seems close behind.

I close my own eyes and lay back on the floor. I hear June and Tull talking about 13 as I drift off to sleep, shivering as I do.

When I wake up, I'm covered with one of the heavier blankets, the tablecloth folded like a pillow behind my head. There's a candle burning, but just one, giving the small church a soft, dim glow. My stomach is really hurting something awful now and when I try to sit up, Tull stops me.

"Hold on there. No need to be sitting up."

"How long have I been asleep?" I ask, a little disoriented with how much time could have passed.

"About 7 hours." He says before leaning down to speak more quietly. "Listen, I think you may be hurt pretty bad. You were moaning in your sleep a lot, holding your stomach. We tried to wake you but you didn't seem to want to wake up. Thought maybe you were just cold so I put the heavier blanket on you. And I think you might have a fever. Your head feels hot. Does anything else hurt?"

"My stomach. It's killing me. Think maybe I tore a muscle or something." I admit as I rub my hand over my stomach. It feels tight and stiff. Something is definitely wrong.

"Just hang in there. They'll find us soon. Storm passed a couple hours 're probably already on the ground searching for us."

"How are June and the boys? They still holding up okay?"

"Yeah. They're sleeping right now. Not much energy. Don't think they've had a lot to eat lately. Think they're glad to be inside though, even if it's cold in here."

"Gotta beat the shelter they built in the woods." I tell him.

"Your clothes are mostly dry. You want me to help you get dressed?" He offers.

"Nah, I can manage." I tell him as I move to sit up. The pain shoots through me so badly that I double over, grasping my stomach.

"Sure you can." He jokes nervously as he slips my shirt over my head and helps me pull my arms through the sleeves. I can't even muster the strength to joke back with him.

After I'm fully dressed, he tries to give me a drink of water he says they collected from the rainwater but I end up spitting it out because I feel like I might puke if I swallow it. I'm so nauseous. Maybe I'm just getting the flu or something. Maybe that's why my stomach hurts so bad. Whatever it is though, I sure hope the searcher crew gets here soon because even as I lay here trying to convince myself that I have the flu, I know that isn't it. Something is seriously wrong.


	31. Chapter 31

**Chapter 31**

(Madge POV)

I remain firmly seated outside the door of the Communications Bay for at least 5 hours, maybe longer, until, finally, Haymitch opens the door and invites me back inside. By the time I'm back inside, I'm a complete wreck. The imaginative wheels of my mind have been spinning non-stop with all sorts of scenarios playing out. None of them good. Each one seemingly worse than the one before. I'm exhausted and drained. Terrified as each second ticks passed that Gale is missing.

"Come on back in. Storm's over. We're launching a searcher crew again." Haymitch tells me. He doesn't look the least bit surprised that I'm waiting outside the door where he left me.

I stand and follow him back inside. The mood of the room still seems like a mix of somber and tense. I feel physically sick. Exhaustion, stress, worry all contributing to the ache building in my stomach. I quietly take a seat next to Sawyer again.

"We just launched the crew again. They should be at the crash site within the hour. You can stay and listen but stay outta the way and don't go pestering me with your questions." Haymitch tells me. He too seems exhausted and stressed out. I don't fail to notice the multiple empty liquor bottles in the wastebasket. Haymitch always drinks but he definitely is consuming more than normal right now.

I nod at him, keeping my mouth shut and looking away quickly to show him I won't get in the way or be a bother to him. The very last thing I want to happen right now is to have him put me back on the other side of that door. Not now. Not while the searcher crew is out there looking for Gale. I need to be here the minute they land at that crash site. Need to hear the communication come through that tells me what they find.

I stare at the screen ahead of me and sit as still as I can. Once Haymitch is out of earshot, Sawyer leans over and speaks quietly, filling me in on what I missed when I was out in the hallway.

"The Capitol systems are back up. Their radars started working about 2 hours ago. It's dangerous to send a craft out right now but we're doing it anyway. Haymitch insisted on it."

"Can they see us coming? Can they tell that there was a crash earlier?" I whisper back to him in horror.

"They can't tell there was a crash. Not by radar anyway. If there was a fire, it may be visible from ground level but thanks to the thunderstorm, that shouldn't be a concern. If there was a fire, the rain would've put it out pretty fast. And any smoke would be far less noticeable than it would be on a clear day. As for seeing us coming, we have our signals being scrambled but it is still possible they'll see us, it just makes it harder for them to pinpoint our exact location."

"Did we get a medic for the flight this time?"

"Yeah, one medic, one pilot, one communicator and two runners who will actually get out and search for them. It's more than we usually send out on a searcher mission."

I nod and fight down the icky feeling in my stomach. I just feel like something is really, really wrong. Obviously, they crashed, but deep down, I feel like it could be more than that. Like Gale was really hurt in the crash. Or worse, that they won't get to him in time to help him. Or the worst of all, he was hurt so badly that he won't be able to be helped. That there will be nothing they can do to save him.

"Here, you can make yourself useful by watching this screen here. Same way you did it before. Just tell me if you see any blinking lights so I can call the up to Lucie and have them checked out. Okay?"

"Thanks. It helps if I feel like I'm helping." I tell him gratefully. He gives me a half smile and then turns his attention back to his own screen. I watch the screen and try to keep my focus there. Try not to hear the fearful cries screaming at me inside my head. The room around me is filled with a steady whir of low volume conversation and printers spitting out paper filled with data.

It feels like forever before I finally hear the speaker crackle with the communicator's voice. "Alpha. Bravo. Charlie. 3. Landing at designated site."

"Clear to land. Alert when runners active."

"Runners active. Systems off 55 counting down." " I hear just moments later. I feel a rush of adrenaline surging through me and I have to fight the urge to tap my foot against the floor.

"Copy."

"How long will they be on the ground? How long do they look?" I whisper to Sawyer.

"They'll look for an hour. If they don't find anything, they'll come back."

"And if they find something?"

"They'll call back to tell us and we allot them more time based off those findings."

"How do they call back if the systems are down?"

"They can power up the communications system alone and call back to us."

"Sorry for all the questions."

"It's okay. I get it. My wife would be the same way if it was me out there."

For the next several minutes, all I do is stare at the radar screen. I don't see a single blip of activity. None on Sawyer's screen either. This is somewhat comforting in that it means there's less of a chance of anyone Capitol affiliated stumbling upon Gale's crew or the Searcher crew. Still, until I get word that he's okay, until he's back within my grasp, I won't be able to relax.

I snap my head up as I hear the speaker crackle again. "Crash site located. One recovery. Deceased. Remaining 5 not yet located. Request additional time for ground search."

My gasp is audible. The room begins to spin and sway. Deceased? Who did they find? Who died? Where are the other five? I feel bile rising up, filling my mouth and can't pull myself together enough to swallow it back down. Sawyer manages to shove his wastebasket in front of me just in time.

"Get her outta here!" Haymitch barks from across the room. I don't know if it's because I just puked in front of everyone or if it's because he doesn't want me to hear what might come across in the next communications transmission. Sawyer pulls me to my feet and walks me out the door into the hallway, wastebasket still in his hand.

I want to tell him I'm sorry for puking but I just can't find my voice. Can barely find my breath.

"I think maybe you should go on up to your place. I promise to personally come get you as soon as we get any information specific to Gale."

I shake my head and start to protest. "I can't…"

He gently puts his hand on my shoulder. "Madge, you'll only make yourself go crazy in there. I'll come for you myself the very second I know anything about Gale. Now go on home and wait there so I'll know where to find you."

I know it's useless to argue. Haymitch will never let me back in that room. Not now. Not after I've puked everywhere. Not after I've just made a distraction like that. So I cave. "I'll be in my room." I manage to say before I turn and head for home.

As I reach my floor, I run into Rory, Rebekah and Posy. Posy. Crap. I forgot that they'd be bringing her by for me to watch her.

I wipe my sleeve across my face trying to hide proof of my unstable state. "I'm sorry I wasn't home. It really isn't a good day for me to watch Posy, I'm not feeling well." I lie, hoping I look believable.

"No worries. Posey can hang out with us this afternoon." Rebekah says helpfully.

"Actually, why don't you take Posey back to our place and help her make a get well card for Madge? I'll be up in a little while, just wanna get Madge settled into bed since she isn't feeling well." Rory tells Rebekah as he hands Posey off to her. I can't even look at him. He knows I'm lying. He knows something is up and that's why he's getting rid of them.

Rebekah seemingly understands. "I think that's a great idea, isn't it Posey? I bet we can make a really, really pretty card, can't we?"

"I'm the best colorer in my class." Posey tells her confidently.

I wave and try to smile as they head for the elevators. Once they're out of sight, Rory takes my elbow and guides me towards my door. Once inside, he folds his arms over his chest and looks at me, eyebrow raised. When I can't even find the words to begin, he outright asks me.

"What's going on Madge? Cause I know it isn't that you're sick."

"I can't…it's too awful." Is all I manage before bursting into tears.

He immediately hugs me and asks again more gently. "C'mon, whatever it is, you can talk about it to me."

"It's Gale. He's missing. He was on a mission and they crashed and the searcher found a body and I puked and I don't know what to do." I cry into his chest.

"What? Slow down, you aren't making sense." He says pulling me back and studying my face.

I take a few slow, deep breaths, trying to calm down enough to explain it all. "This morning, Gale went on a mission to the woods of 12, to look for survivors, there was a storm and the hovercraft crashed in the woods. They've got a crew out there searching for them now. They just found the wreckage of the craft and one dead body but not the rest of the people that were on the hovercraft."

He sits, obviously stunned at what he just heard. When he finally speaks, he has to clear his throat first. "Okay, so they didn't identify who was dead and the others are missing?"

I nod.

"Let's be optimistic. If they only found one body, that means the rest of them are somewhere in those woods. Gale knows the woods. He'll keep them safe until the search crew can get them out of there."

"But Rory, what if it's him? What if he's never coming back?"

"Stop. You can't think like that. I can't handle thinking like that. We've gotta stay calm. Well, as calm as we can. When will we hear anything new?"

I wipe my eyes on my sleeve again and try to stop crying, fighting down hiccups. "I had to leave the communications bay because I was a distraction. I threw up. I'm supposed to wait here until they come to tell me anything else."

"Okay then, I'm waiting here with you." He says, plopping down on the floor.

"Thanks." I say as I try to stifle another hiccup.

"Hey, you got your book back? I thought Peeta still had that." He says as he notices my book on the nightstand.

"Yeah. Gale got it from Katniss." I tell him and then I realize he doesn't know I got my memory back. With everything going on with Gale, my memory coming back hadn't been on my mind at all.

"By the way, seeing that book was really helpful. When I saw it my memory came back. All of it."

"What? All of it?" He asks, eyes wide.

"Yeah, all of it. Just like that."

"Madge that's awesome! Why didn't you tell any of us?" He asks, obviously excited.

"Didn't get the chance. Just happened last night. Everything happened so fast and I was getting checked out by my doctors when Gale left for his mission and I've been down in Defense all day waiting for news on him."

"Hey, it's a good thing. Focus on that. Think about how exciting it'll be for you and Gale to tell everybody about it later? You know how many of us have been waiting for your memory to come back?"

"I know. I'm excited. Just can't think about it right now."

He's about to say something else, his mouth opening to speak when there's a knock at the door. An urgent one.

I fly to hit so fast I don't think my feet touch the floor. When I swing it open, I find not Sawyer, but Haymitch, several rolled up papers in his hand.

"Need your help princess and I need it fast." He says as he pushes passed me and starts unrolling maps on the bed. Rory quickly works to help him get the maps spread out.

"This here is a map of 12 and the surrounding areas. Gale's crash happened about here." He says as he makes an X on the map with a red marker. "Our searcher crew found a lake, not on current Capitol maps about here." He tells me as he draws a large circle.

"Gale knows the area all around the lake!" I say hurriedly.

"That's what I was hoping for. Now, the runner found a cabin by the lake that looked like people had been there recently. There was a word written on the wall in mud. Mud making us think it was from Gale's crew given all the rain and wet ground. We can't make any sense of the word though and that's where you come in. It said PROPOSAL. Mean anything to you?"

The church. That's where Gale proposed. He's hiding at the church! "Yes! It means they're at the church! It's where Gale proposed to me! He's telling us he's hiding at the church!" I say frantically.

"Alright, now we're making progress. I know you can't remember a lot of stuff right now but I need to know if Gale ever told you where the church was?"

I shake my head furiously. "No, my memory is back! Came back last night. I remember exactly where the church is!" I practically shout with anxiousness.

"Well how's about you draw me a map on here so I can call some directions down to my guys on the ground." He says with a smile as he hands me the red marker.

I lean over the map, studying the lake and the cabin. From there, I draw a line to where the church should be and then hand it back to Haymitch.

"You sure?"

"Sure. It's a small wooden church with stained glass windows. Really hidden away but that's how you get to it."

He circles an area around where I've marked and then pulls a walkie talkie from his hip. "We've got a possible location. Almost certain that's where they're at. Coordinates on the map are 35.5033027N and 80.918611W. You're looking for a small wooden church, somewhat hidden away from sight." He instructs through the radio.

"Now what?" I ask as soon as they say "copy" back to him on the radio.

"Now we bring them home. Thanks for your help, I'll let ya know when he's back." He says as he heads back out the door.

"Wait! I want to come with you!" I say as I rush after him, Rory on my heels too.

"Sorry, can't have ya down there right now. Not til I get word that everything's okay. I'll send for you soon, stay here so I can find you." He says over his shoulder, not stopping.

I feel frustration melt over me and I have to clench my fists and bite my tongue to keep from swearing. I need to be down there! I feel Rory'shand on my shoulder again and he nods his head back into my room. I reluctantly follow him in there and sit down again.

"So we can relax now. He's okay." Rory says with a smile.

"Yeah, we can! He left that clue because he knew I'd know what it was! Oh my God, I'm so glad my memory came back! I wouldn't have known how to find him otherwise!"

"See, it's all working out just fine. You were worried for nothing." He says with a grin.

"I'll still feel better when I can wrap my arms around his neck. And then I'm gonna ring his neck for leaving on a mission without saying goodbye to me first."

He laughs and I smile. I'm not back to laughter just yet but I'm much, much better now.

(Gale POV)

I drift back to sleep but wake several more times. Each time I wake up, my stomach hurts worse and feels more stiff to the touch. And I definitely feel feverish. My left arm and shoulder are starting to ache too but I think that may be from sleeping on the floor for so long. Or maybe just more soreness from the crash.

I can't figure out what's taking them so long to find us. Why isn't anyone here for us yet? My mind begins to wonder if something happened in Medical with Madge. Had her memory disappeared as quickly as it came back? If that happened, she wouldn't even know how to find us. She wouldn't understand my clue. She wouldn't know how to find the church. What was I thinking leaving a clue like that? That was so stupid of me! I groan both from the pain and from my own frustration about the clue I left.

"Want to try drinking some more water?" Tull asks me as he comes over, having heard my groan.

"Nuh uh. I'm not thirsty. Look, I think I'm getting worse here. My whole stomach feels hard as a rock and it hurts like hell. If they don't find us soon, I don't think I'm gonna make it. We may need to come up with a plan to get the rest of you some food and some way to have a fire just in case it's a few days before they find you."

"Just hang in there. They'll be here soon." He says but even in the dim candle lit room, I can see nothing but worry on his face.

"I'm serious. Something's bad wrong and it's only getting worse. If something happens to me, you'll need to know how to survive out here."

He looks at me but doesn't say anything.

"Back at the cabin you'll find a fishing pole. There's fish in the lake. Think you can figure it out?"

He nods so I continue. "Water in the lake is safe to drink. Might find some pecan trees somewhere near here too. If you make fire, try to keep it small, don't draw any more attention to yourself than you have too. And try to ration the matches, once they're gone, it'll be near impossible for you to create a fire." I say amidst groans as the pain makes it increasingly hard to speak so much.

"Got it, but I don't think we need to worry about that yet. I know they're looking for us. They'll come soon." He tells me trying to be reassuring but I don't buy it. I have to tell him one more thing.

"And if anything happens and I don't make it, you have to make sure Madge knows that I love her more than anything."

"Shhh. Just rest, okay?" He says as he lays a wet cloth over my forehead.

I close my eyes, not having the strength to keep talking. I've never hurt like this before. I've never been this scared before. I drift back to sleep with a sobering, sickening feeling accompanying my pain. I may not make it out of here. This could very well be where I die.

At some point I hear new voices around me. I feel people touching me, maybe moving me, I'm not sure. I can't seem to force my eyes to open or my mouth to speak. All I'm sure of is the pain. The searing pain in my stomach , chest and shoulder.

I feel pressing on my abdomen and a pinching sensation on my arm. Voices drift in and out but I'm never conscious enough to make sense of them and they never speak directly to me. It's almost as if I'm imagining them. Dreaming them up. I think I vomit at one point but again, I'm not sure. Maybe I just think I did. Maybe it never happened. Maybe this is a dream.

Beeping. I hear constant beeping. And something presses over my mouth and nose. I feel air blowing into my nose and mouth, filling my lungs. I feel myself lifted, several hands on me as I'm moved. I don't know what's happening and suddenly I feel myself drifting off even further, unable to fight against the sleepiness pulling me deeper and deeper. The last thing I think as I get sucked under is that I hear Madge's voice. Angelic and soft. Whispering that she loves me.


	32. Chapter 32

**Chapter 32**

(Madge POV)

"He's on his way back, they're taking him directly over to Medical. Should be there in the next 15 minutes or so." Sawyer tells me as soon as I open the door. He doesn't even bother with a greeting, already sure of how anxious I am to hear about Gale's return.

"Medical? What's wrong?"

"Come on, I'll explain on the way there." Sawyer explains and I follow behind him towards the elevators.

"Is he okay?" Rory asks as he comes along with us.

"This is Gale's brother, Rory." I explain hurriedly.

Sawyer nods to Rory as if to say hello and then begins to explain what knowledge he has of Gale's condition. "All I know is that he is alive. Been mostly unconscious since they found him. Fever, hardened abdomen. Complaints of stomach pains prior to losing consciousness according to Tull, the communicator that was on his original flight. They're prepping for possible emergency surgery now."

"Oh my God!" I utter in frightened whisper. I hear Rory suck in a breath next to me.

"Don't read too much into it yet. Wait and see what the actual doctors have to say once they've had a look at him. Could be nothing to worry about at all. Maybe dehydration or something simple like that." Sawyer says to us.

"Will they let me see him? Right away?"

"I'll see what I can do to make that happen." Sawyer tells me as we exit the elevator and make our way over to Medical.

As soon as we enter, I can tell he isn't here yet. It's too calm here. Too many people standing still. Not the frenzy one would expect if emergency surgery is occurring.

"Have the crew and passengers from the Defense flight crash arrived yet?" Sawyer asks the woman at the front desk, holding out his badge for her to examine.

"No, not yet. We expect them any moment though." She tells him.

"Thank you, we'll wait." He replies with kindness in his voice. We sit on a bench near the front desk.

"Thank you for coming to get me. I appreciate it." I tell him as I nervously wring my hands together in my lap.

"Of course. I knew you'd want to know the moment he was on his way back. You were quite helpful by the way. Knowing how to read Gale's proposal clue and knowing how to find the church."

"Lucky for us my memory came back just yesterday. Otherwise, I'd have been no help whatsoever."

"Glad to hear about your memory."

I'm about to thank him when the room becomes a flurry of commotion. Doors swing open and a bed gets pushed in, medics all around it. It's Gale. I'm on my feet and rushing behind them as they hurry down the hallway towards an Operating Room. I hear Sawyer and Rory call out after me but I don't turn back. I have to get to Gale, have to see him with my own eyes. Have to know what's wrong. When I catch up to them and feel a pair of arms grab hold of me, holding me back.

"You can't be in here, this is a sterile environment!" A woman tells me disdainfully. I look at her and then back at the bed where Gale is lying unconscious with a clear mask over his nose and mouth, tubes coming from his wrist. I shove away from her and lunge for the bed. I've barely managed to whisper that I love him when a second, stronger pair of arms pulls me back and out of the room.

"That's my husband!" I cry out through a fit of tears.

"Doesn't matter who he is, you can't be in there right now. Go wait in the waiting room and someone will come for you when the surgery's completed." A man orders me.

"Sorry, I'll take her to the waiting area." I hear and I spin around to see Sawyer standing there.

"Sawyer, I have to be in there! They haven't even told me what's wrong with him and they're about to operate!"

"Come on, I know how we can get some information." He says with a wink. I follow behind him as he leads us out of the Medical Center and back to Defense. I trust him enough to not ask questions yet. He explains anyway as we walk. "The crew that worked the Searcher flight should be back in Defense, completing their end of flight paperwork and reports before they head home. That includes the medics who worked the flight."

Once we're in Defense again, he takes us to a room where several men are doing paperwork at desks.

"Hey guys, this Madge, Gale's wife. Medical doesn't have time to talk to her right now and she really needs to know what's going on right now. Anybody got any info they can share with her?" Sawyer asks.

"Over here. Take a seat." One man towards the back of the room says. I head towards him and sit.

"I was one of the medic's on the flight. When we found your husband, he was unconscious, feverish and had a distended abdomen." He begins.

"I already know that part. I just need to know what it is that's wrong, how he's hurt." I interrupt impatiently.

"We suspect he has a ruptured spleen."

"Is that fixable? Is that something they can repair?"

"That's what the surgery is for I'm sure." He nods. "Losing a spleen isn't the end of the world if that helps at all."

"Thank you." I say as I get up and go back to the doorway where Sawyer and Rory are waiting for me.

"Possible ruptured spleen. He can live without it if they have to remove it." I explain. I'm relaxing only a little bit now that I have this new information. I won't be completely fine until the surgery is over and he's awake and can tell me in his own words just how fine he really is. Only then can I truly relax.

"We should tell Ma now that we know what's going on. She'd wanna know." Rory says.

"Yes, I think we should." I agree. We'd decided earlier that we didn't want to alert her to anything until we knew more about what the situation really involved.

"And I need to be heading on home myself." Sawyer says. He looks exhausted and I know he must be. He's been working nonstop all day long.

"I sincerely want to thank you for being so patient with me today and for all your help with everything. You were much kinder than necessary and it was truly appreciated." I tell him.

"Tell Gale I'll stop by and check on him tomorrow." He says with a nod of his head, shrugging off my thanks as if it wasn't needed.

Rory and I go off in search of Hazelle so we can break the news about Gale's crash and injury and surgery. We agree not to tell the kids yet because it may scare them too much. Thankfully, Rebekah's still there and she's able to distract them with a game so Rory and I can speak privately with Hazelle. She handles it with much more strength than I did. Concern is obvious on her face but not the panic I'd personally felt. I tell her I'll send someone up just as soon as he's awake from his surgery and then head back down alone to the Medical Center to wait.

(Gale POV)

I feel her hand in mine before I even open my eyes. I know it's hers. Can tell just by the feel of it. I must have been rescued, must be back in 13. I can tell I'm in Medical from the sounds around me and the feel of tubing against my skin.

"Hey beautiful." I croak out, my voice rougher than I expect it to be.

"Gale!" She cries out in relief. Her eyes are red and puffy and she looks as if she hasn't slept a wink in days.

"Been waiting for me?" I ask, trying to joke about it.

"I was so worried! They had to do surgery and I barely got a glimpse of you until after they were finished. I've been right here by your side waiting for you to wake up for the last hour. How do you feel?"

"Nauseous. Sore. Beyond glad to see you. Confused about what all happened."

"You were injured internally during your crash. They had to remove your spleen to save your life. The doctor said if it had been just a few more hours, you could have died."

"Well that explains all the pain I had in my stomach." I mumble, thinking back to the debilitating cramps that I'd felt as I laid on the floor of the church.

"Your surgery went just fine. No complications. They said that you can come home in a couple days."

"A couple days? It's that serious?"

"You could have died Gale so yes, it's that serious." She tells me and I can see in her expression just how worried she's been.

"Well I'm fine now so no need to worry any longer. Anybody tell my family bout all this?"

"Rory and your mother, not the kids. I promised to send someone for your mother the minute you woke up. Feel up for a visit?"

"Not really but I'd rather they know I'm okay than continue to worry. So go on and get em down here. Not Posy though. The tubes and stuff would just freak her out." I say as I rub my fingers over the tube I feel going into my nostril.

She stands and leans over to kiss me quickly. "I'll just send for your mother and Rory, and then be right back." She assures me as she heads for the door, bumping into a medic who was entering just as she tried to exit.

"How are we feeling Mr. Hawthorne?" The Medic asks as she begins checking all my tubing.

"Kinda yucky but glad to be here." I tell her. I feel really tired and the soreness I felt before is getting a little more noticeable by the minute. Nausea too.

"Any pain?" She asks as she pulls back my blankets and lifts my medical gown to inspect my incision.

"Some serious soreness." I say as I make the mistake of looking down at my incision. Red and puffy, stitched shut. The nausea I felt before makes me swallow hard as I fight the urge to vomit.

"And some nausea too I see." She comments as she places a small basin in my hand in case I throw up.

I nod and close my eyes. I do not want to puke right now. It passes after a minute and I open my eyes again.

"You'll be with us for at least a day or two before we can remove the tube in your nose and send you back home."

"And after that? How long a recovery are we talking about?"

"About a month or so until you're back to normal. This will help with the soreness." She says as she injects something into the tube on my arm. Almost instantly I feel sleep pulling me under. I try to fight it but it's no use. I'm too tired and the medicine's too strong for me to battle against.

When I wake up this time, Rory's here but no one else.

"Where's Madge?"

"Sent her home to get some sleep. She was dead on her feet."

"How long was I out?" I ask him as I rub my eyes.

"Bout 4 hours. Medic said she gave you some pain meds that knocked you right out. Ma and Madge were here until about an hour ago. Told em I'd stick around until you woke up again."

"Geez, I was awake for all of 4 minutes and out cold for 4 hours?"

"Pretty much, yeah. How ya feelin?" He asks, leaning back in his chair so that it's balancing on it's back two legs.

"Sore and a little out of energy. Nausea seems to be gone though."

"You scared the hell outta Madge, ya know. When you crashed."

"I know. I'm really lucky I made it out of there alive. The pilot didn't make it. I wasn't even strapped into my seat when we crashed. Got tossed all over the place."

"But you survived." He comments.

"Just barely, but yeah."

"You gonna keep doing missions after this? After you recover?"

"I dunno. Probably. Hadn't really had time to think about it yet. Why?"

"Just seems stupid is all. It's an awful lot of risk taking when you've got people here worrying about you. There's other stuff you could do here instead of always being the one out in the field you know."

"Rory, I know you guys were worried and I get it, but I'm fine now. Everything is fine. And just because there was one crash doesn't mean there will be another one."

He shrugs and stands to leave. "Your choice. Just thought I'd point out the stupidity of it is all."

"Rory, come on…" I begin but he cuts me off with a wave of his hand.

"I'll see ya tomorrow. Gonna go on home and get some sleep. You want me to stop by and wake up Madge, send her back down here?"

"No, let her sleep."

He leaves and I'm only alone for a moment before the medic comes in again. "Ah, you're awake again. How are we feeling now?"

"Nausea's gone. Still sore but not as much as earlier. Tired."

"You'll be pretty sore for a few days. Might feel pretty weak too. Want something else for the pain and soreness?" She asks holding up a syringe.

"Nah, I'll skip it. Think I'd like to be awake for a couple hours before I get knocked out again."

"Just hit that call button if you change your mind. I'll be back to check on you in a few hours."

"Thanks." I tell her as she leaves.

Now, alone with my thoughts, Rory's words run back through my mind again. Is he right? Is it stupid of me to want to still go out on missions? This was a fluke thing, the crash and all. It won't happen like this every time. It's like when I used to sneak into the woods and go hunting. It was dangerous but most all the time, everything was fine. Worst that ever happened was I got a few bruises or some skinned up knees and elbows. And I'm fine going out on missions too. What happened this time shouldn't keep me from going out again. But it's what he said about me leaving people behind to worry about me that keeps jabbing at my thoughts. If it was the other way around, if it was me staying behind worrying and Rory or Madge going out, would I feel the same way as they do? Would I worry nonstop until they came back? Yeah, I would. I'd probably even forbid them to go after something like what just happened to me.

I sigh out loud which leads me to find that taking deep breaths hurts like hell. I wince in pain and wait for it to pass. It does. Mostly anyway. Eventually I must drift off to sleep again because the next thing I'm aware of is someone's hand on my shoulder, shaking me lightly. I open my eyes and find Katniss.

"Hey, what are you doing here? I thought you were still laid up in your own hospital bed."

"They let me go home yesterday. Still in a cast but no more surgeries and no more traction. Got my own set of wheels to get around." She explains as she gestures to her wheelchair.

"Who told you I was here?"

"Haymitch. I went into work this morning. Wondered why you weren't part of the group preparing to rescue Madge's father. They gave me the whole story. So you crashed, huh?"

"Yeah. And I'm still part of the mission to save Madge's father. I'll be outta here in a day or so and I'll be right back at work."

"Nuh-uh. Medical has you written out of active duty for the next 4-6 weeks. Saw the paperwork myself on Haymitch's desk. That means no missions for you. And the research and planning is finishing up today."

"4-6 weeks? I'll miss the whole thing!"

"I know that. Looks like it's going to happen soon. Really soon. Probably best you're out of commission anyway. Every person in the Capitol knows who you are. You'd put the whole mission at risk just by being there."

"It's her father though, I have to be there."

"Have to nothing. It's already happening without you and that's just how it is. You can go ahead and let that go right now." She laughs.

"Did you come just to laugh at me and bring bad news?" I ask. My patience for her wearing thin.

"Just thought I'd say hi is all. I know how much fun it isn't to lay around in a hospital bed by yourself all day." She shrugs.

"Well maybe next time you bring some good news with you?"

"I'll see what I can do about that. For now though, I think I'll head off to lunch. I'll try and stop by tomorrow though, give you all the updates on the upcoming mission. Just because you won't be a part of it doesn't mean you can't know what's going on."

I watch as she wheels herself out the door leaving me once again alone in this room. I guess Rory will be getting what he wants this time with me not being part of the mission anymore. He won't have to worry about me. My mother and Madge won't have to worry either. I'll be right here, being basically no use at all to the most important mission to happen since we arrived in 13. And there's nothing I can do about it.


	33. Chapter 33

**Chapter 33**

(Gale POV)

"Come here."

"I'm right here." She says in confusion.

"No, up here. With me." I tell her as I pat the bed next to me.

"I don't want to jostle you." She tells me hesitantly, chewing her bottom lip.

"Just get up here already, would ya?" I say again with a roll of my eyes. She hesitates a moment more before obliging me and climbing up and laying down next to me.

"Just tell me if I hurt you or anything. I don't want to make you feel any worse than you already do." She says nervously.

"Hush. All I want is you, curled up next to me. That alone will make me feel better." I tell her as I put my right arm around her and kiss her temple. And I mean it. Just having her here does make me feel better. Well, at the very least it distracts me from the continual soreness I feel on my left side. It's really unbelievable how sore one little missing spleen can make you feel. Unbelievable and ridiculous.

"I love you, you know that? I can't tell you how glad, how relived, I am that you're back and that you're going to be okay." She says softly as she leans her head against me.

"Love you too. So much."

"I'm serious. Do you have any idea how worried I was? I was a wreck. Puked in the Communications Bay and everything."

"You puked in Communications?" I ask, holding back a snicker as I picture her puking in there. I know it isn't funny but at the same time, it kinda is.

"Mmhmm. Sawyer was wonderful about it though. Gave me his wastebasket just in the nick of time and didn't get angry at all. Actually, he was extremely patient with me the entire time you were gone. Took time to explain what was going on, even gave me a task so I could feel useful. You should really thank him next time you see him."

"Sawyer? Hmm, that's awful cool of him. I barely know the guy."

"Well, apparently he helped work my own rescue. I was worried that I was bothering him but he assured me that I wasn't and said I was acting the exact same way that his own wife would've acted if it was him out there awaiting a rescue."

"Didn't even know he was married."

"Hey, how was the church? Did the storm damage it? Was it still how it was when we found it before?"

"Yeah. Wish you coulda seen it again too. I'm glad you were able to understand my clue at the cabin. I didn't think about it until after we were already at the church but it was stupid of me to leave a clue like that."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, when I last spoke to you before I left you had your memory but the doctors were still examining you so for all I know it could have been gone again. Could've been a temporary thing, ya know?"

"Nope, it's still here. To stay. How come you didn't just stay at the cabin?"

"I was worried that our crash might have drawn attention and I didn't want the wrong people to find us. The church was good for shelter and all but it was so cold. It would've been nice to have the fireplace from the cabin but I didn't wanna risk it."

"Thanks for that. The not risking it, I mean."

"Hey, I don't suppose you know how the rest of the people from my crash are doing? Nobody's told me anything."

"You faired the worst of it all. Well, of those who survived anyway. The woman and her children are fine. Dehydrated and malnourished but overall just fine. And the communicator, Tull, he's completely fine, just a few scrapes and bruises."

"It was awful out there. There were graves out there. That woman, her name is June, she told me there were more of them who survived the initial destruction of 12 but died trying to survive out in the woods. They had to bury them right there in the woods. When I found her and those kids, they were hidden is this crappy little shelter of sticks and pine needles. I honestly doubt that they could've survived much longer themselves." I tell her as images flood back through my mind."

"Did you see any of 12?" She asks me quietly.

"Just a tiny bit. I wasn't allowed to go over there, had to stay in the woods. What I saw though was just charred rubble, nothing left. They really were intent on destroying all of it."

"I don't know if I'll ever be able to shake the feeling that I hold so much responsibility for all of this. If my mother just would've not signed that marital contract on my behalf, none of this would've happened."

"Nah, don't take all this on yourself. The way I see it, if it wasn't one thing it just would've been something else. That's how Snow operates. He can't let people just be happy and live life. If she hadn't signed a contract, there just would've been something else for him to toy with and attack. You've just have the misfortune of being his focus is all."

"Gale, if I ask you something will you answer me honestly?"

"Always."

"The mission with my father…are you still going to try and work it?"

"I want to but I can't. The doctors wrote me out of active duty for the next month and a half. Katniss says it'll all go done much sooner than that." I tell her glumly. I feel her relax a little next to me when I tell her I won't be going and it makes Rory's words ring back in my ears.

"How do you feel about me going back out on missions once I'm cleared by my doctors though? I may be missing this next mission but I know there will come a time for others."

"I'm torn. I don't want you to go ever again because I don't want to ever feel the overwhelming fear I felt this time but then I also know that's very selfish of me to feel that way. And that makes me want you to go and to do whatever you're best at when it comes to helping with missions and I know that puts you out there in the middle of all the action."

I sigh. "Yeah, I get that. I mean, neither of us would be here if it weren't for other people be willing to step up and do missions so I feel like it's only natural that I do what I can to pay it forward but then I think about how I hate making you and my family worry about me and it makes me feel guilty."

"But I do think you should keep doing them." She says very quietly.

"You do?"

"Yeah, I do. But I am thankful I have a few weeks to recover before I have to worry about you again."

"Did I tell you yet how much I love you?" I tease with a smile and she smiles back, burying her face against me. I go to reach for her, momentarily forget to be gentle on my left side and end up causing a shooting pain through my chest and abdomen. The pain makes me tense up and wince for a second and Madge notices of course.

'What's the matter? Did I hurt you?" She asks, eyes wide as she sits up quickly.

"No, it was me. I moved wrong. I'm fine though, just a little flash of pain over my incision is all." I tell her as I try to get her to lay back down with me.

"You have to be careful. You didn't pull any stitches out did you?"

"Madge, calm down, I said I was fine."

"Let me check your incision." She insists not buying what I'm saying.

"Would you stop?" I say pushing her hand back as she reaches for my blanket. I hate having her fuss over me like this. Feels weird. I'm the one who should be making a fuss over her.

"Gale Hawthorne, either you let me check that incision or I call for the medic to do it for me. Your choice." She tells me as she hops off the bed and folds her arms over her chest.

I give her a look hoping she'll cave and lay back down but she just stares right back at me, eyebrow raised, refusing to budge. I don't have the energy to keep fighting her on it so I claim defeat and pull back my blanket and lift my gown for her to see my stitches. I look away though, not wanting to see it again myself.

"It looks okay I guess. Does it still hurt?" She asks as I feel her fingers ever so gently trail over the edges of the incision.

"No. I told you it was fine. You're making a fuss for no reason." I tell her, trying as hard as I can to be patient with her.

"I just don't want you to try and be all tough about this if you're actually hurting. I want you to get better."

"I know. Just wish you wouldn't make a big deal about it is all."

"I need to get going anyway. Posy will be coming by in a bit, don't want to keep her waiting again." She says effectively changing the subject.

"You're leaving?" I pout.

"I can come back with Posy if you want. I know she'd love to see you."

"Nah, not til I'm outta here and back home. No need for her to see me like this." I say as I point at my various tubes.

"Love you, I'll come back after dinner." She tells me as she leans down quickly kissing me goodbye.

"I'll be right here waiting for you." I say, wishing she could stay. I love that she keeps Posy but right now, I'd rather have her here with me.

She blows me one more kiss as she slips out the door of my room. She's amazing that one, and I'm lucky she's mine. Thankful to be alive and be here with her again.

(Madge POV)

Posy and I walk hand in hand to the cafeteria for dinner. She knows that Gale is sick but that's all. We haven't told her anything else and honestly, it's the simplest way to keep it. I doubt she'd understand it in full detail. We collect our trays and head over to where the rest of the Hawthorne clan is gathered, plus Rebekah, Katniss and Peeta.

"Hey, it's good to see you out and about finally!" I tell Katniss as I sit down next to her.

"Tell me about it." She replies with an exasperated sigh. "I don't think I could have possible stood another day laid up in that hospital bed."

"When do you get the cast off?"

"Ugh, at least another month in this thing but possibly longer. It itches like you wouldn't believe." She says with a roll of her eyes.

"Do you get to go back to work yet?"

"Yup. Already started back today. No active duty though."

"Well, Gale's out of active duty for several weeks himself. At least you'll be able to keep each other company at work." I tell her with a smile.

"What's active duty?" Posy asks with a tug of my sleeve. I hadn't realized she was listening so closely to our conversation.

"Just means that because Gale hasn't been feeling well, they'll give him easy work to do so he can rest and get better faster." I explain.

"Did he broken his leg too?" She asks.

"Oh no, not at all! Just sort of has a really bad tummy ache is all."

"When my tummy hurted, Prim's Ma gived me medicines."

"And did it make you feel better?"

She nods her little head up and down.

"Well, that's the same thing the doctors are doing for Gale. And as soon as he's all better he'll come see you."

"Maybe we can make him a get well card too." Rebekah offers to Posy.

"After dinner?" Posy asks her.

"Just as soon as you're finished." Rebekah tells her pushing her plate towards her, drawing her attention back to the meal.

The rest of the meal goes by quickly and I find myself eating a little faster than usual so that I can get back down to see Gale again before he goes to sleep. As soon as I'm finished, I excuse myself from the table and make a mad dash for the Medical Center. I end up passing Tripp in the stairwell. Even though I'm in a hurry, I know I should stop and talk to him for a minute or two. I'd been sort of avoiding him because I felt awkward with the combination of finding out he loved me and not having my memory. I just wasn't sure how to act around him. But, now I have my memory and things can be normal again. I can be normal again.

"Hey Madge! How's it going?" He asks, smiling big.

"Good. Really good. Guess what?"

"What?"

"I got my memory back!" I tell him as I tap my fingertip against the side of my head.

His whole face lights up and it's evident how truly happy he is for me. "Madge! That's incredible!"

"Tell me about it! It came back, in a flash of a moment, out of nowhere."

"Well, congratulations! Where are you off too right now? I was just heading to dinner myself."

"I'm heading down to Medical to see Gale."

"Is he sick?"

"Not exactly. He had surgery. But everything's fine, he's just healing up."

"Well, tell him I hope he feels better soon. I'll see ya later." He says as he starts to continue up the stairs.

"Thanks, I'll be sure and tell him. And hey, maybe you and I can catch up sometime this week and talk. It's been awhile." I tell him.

"That'd be great." He says, grinning again.

"Okay, lunch tomorrow maybe?"

"Sounds good, see you then!"

I wave goodbye and then resume making my way down to Medical. When I get there, Gale's lying in bed with his eyes closed. Damn, I was hoping he wouldn't be asleep yet. I hover outside the door, debating whether or not to go in or go on home but I really just want to be near him so I go in. As quietly as I can I make my way over to the bed and sit down in the chair next to him.

"You lost your mind again? Get up here with me." He says, eyes still closed but hand held out to me.

"How'd you know it was me? I thought you were sleeping?" I ask in amusement as I carefully climb onto the bed to lay next to him.

"Just resting my eyes is all. And I knew it was you. I'd know those footsteps anywhere. They're my favorite ones to hear."

"You sleepy?" I ask as he tilts his head over to kiss my forehead.

"Mmmhmm. Was waiting til you got back to fall asleep though."

I rest me cheek against his chest and close my eyes too. It feels so good to have him next to me again. I only mean to stay until he falls asleep and then go home but next thing I know, I feel someone shaking my arm.

"Excuse me, but you can't sleep here mam." A medic whispers.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep. What time is it?" I whisper.

"It's alright. I'd let you stay except it isn't allowed. Department policy and all. It's late, well past midnight."

"I'll just be going then. Sorry." I apologize in whisper again as I tiptoe out of the room.

Out in the hallway, it's quiet and empty. I walk as quietly as I can so as to not wake any other sleeping patients. I certainly didn't intend to be here so late. Just as I round the corner though, I pause, having heard my name. Well, not my name. The Undersee name. I lean close against the wall and listen to the conversation happening on the other side of the wall.

"She'll need a full analysis. Whatever treatment they've been providing, we'll need to supplement. Her poisoning is severe and we won't be able to undo the years of damage to her brain but we should be able to provide pain relief and comfort."

"Did they give you an ETA yet?"

"Not yet. I expect they'll let us know more once they're in position. Just be ready when the call comes in."

"I'm heading home to get some shut eye but I'll have my pager on me."

My mother! They were just talking about my mother! And they were talking about bringing her here! That means the mission is either taking place right now or nearly about to get started! My mother, my father and Mabel will be here soon! I can't believe they're going to be here! I mean, I knew the mission was still going to happen and that it would be soon but I never thought for a minute that it would be this soon!


	34. Chapter 34

**Chapter 34**

(Gale POV)

It hurts like hell when they finally take that tube outta my nose before they send me home. It reminds me of what it feels like when you're drinking something and you laugh or get choked up and it shoots out your nose. I pinch my nose with my fingers and try to get rid of the burning sensation in my nostrils. It passes in a few minutes.

"You'll need to cover your incision with this special bandage when you shower. Try to keep it as dry as you possibly can." The Medic says as she hands me a handful of clear bandages.

"Am I clear to do whatever I want? Outside of active duty at work, I mean?" I ask.

"You'll need to keep your physical activity to a minimal level until the stitches are removed in a few days. After that, it would be wise of you to proceed with caution, taking baby steps instead of giant leaps." She replies.

It isn't exactly what I was trying to ask but it does give me a good enough answer I suppose so I don't push it any further. No need to make it awkward.

"You can take these for any pain you have but make sure you come back down here if the pain is persistent or if the pills don't help." She says as she puts a small bottle of pink colored pills in my hand. "And take one of these with meals, three times a day until they're gone. You need to take all of them so please be sure you finish the entire prescription." She continues as she places another bottle of pills in front of me. Something she says is to prevent infections that I'm now more susceptible to since I no longer have a spleen.

"Anything else?" I ask with a small sigh. All I really want is to get the heck out of here. I have no idea how Katniss managed to stay sane holed up in her medical room for as long as she was there. Right now, I feel like just five more minutes in this place would send me over the edge.

The medic laughs and tells me I can go. I hop a smidgen to eagerly off the bed and have bite the inside of my cheek to keep from wincing as a wave of pain ripples through me. I glance over at the medic who I find staring at me, eyebrow raised with her hand on her hip. Yeah, she knows what I just did. She knows I just got my first dose of pain due to stupidity. I give her a guilty smile and shrug, holding my hands up.

"Remember what I said about baby steps!" She calls after me as hurry out the door, bag of medicines and bandages in hand.

It's nearly dinner so I should be able to find Madge either at home or in the cafeteria. She was with me last night when I fell asleep but gone when I woke up this morning. I'd expected her to come back this morning after breakfast but she never did. Katniss either. In fact, I haven't had a visitor all day.

When I get home, I find an empty place. No sign of Madge. I drop my bag on the bed and sit down for a minute to rest. I probably shouldn't have taken the stairs. That medic seriously wasn't kidding with the whole baby steps thing. I sincerely hope I get my stamina back really soon. How pathetic is it that climbing a few flights of stairs has me needing to take a damn break? Geez.

After a few minutes of rest, I decide to head for the cafeteria via the elevator this time. I'm not even hungry, I just want to see my Madge. Waiting in line for the elevator reminds me just how much I hate using the elevators here and why I switched to the stairs in the first place. After what feels like an eternity, I finally make it to the cafeteria. Since I'm not hungry, I skip the food line and search the crowded tables for my family and Madge. I find my family but not Madge. Where the hell is she? In line still maybe?

"Gale!" Posy shrieks as soon as she sees me and begins a full on sprint towards me. I can't help but smile as she races towards me, waving both tiny hands above her head.

I squat down to her level and wait for her to reach me. She throws her arms around my neck and I hug her, keeping her a little back so she isn't up against my incision. "Are you all better?"

"Almost. Still gotta be careful with my tummy for a little while though, okay?" I tell her as I pat my hand over my stomach.

"Okay! I made you a card but it's at home. You gonna eat dinner with us?" She asks, tugging my hand and pulling me towards the table.

"I'm gonna sit and visit but I'm not hungry." I tell her as I keep my eyes peeled for Madge.

"Hey, you guys seen Madge at all?" I ask as I sit down with my family.

"Nice to see you too Gale." My mother says sarcastically.

"Sorry, I'm glad to see all of you of course but I haven't seen Madge at all today and I'm just anxious to find her is all." I explain apologetically as I flash a smile around the table at my family. They smile back, having long since been aware that my infatuation with Madge takes precedent over anything and everything else.

"And to answer your question, no, we haven't seen Madge. Not since breakfast." My mother says.

"Where could she be?" I wonder aloud.

"Maybe she's working." Rory offers up through a mouthful of food.

"Maybe. I didn't think was supposed to work today though." I say.

He just shrugs and shovels another forkful into his mouth.

"How are you feeling?" I hear my mother ask but I'm so lost in scanning the room for Madge that I fail to answer her. "Gale?" She asks again.

"Huh? Sorry…I'm okay. Still a little sore. Supposed to take it easy for a few days."

"Perhaps you should just go look for her dear. She's bound to be around her somewhere."

"Yeah, I think I will. Sorry, I'll come by and hang out soon, I just…it's weird that she isn't here, that I haven't seen her today." I say as I go to leave.

"You hafta come to our house and get your card!" Posy whines from across the table.

"I will, I promise. Can't wait to see it." I tell her apologetically as I reach over and ruffle her hair. She quiets down but still holds a pouty look on her face as I walk off.

I look around and don't see Katniss or Peeta either. Peeta's probably in back working right now. Maybe he's seen her. I head for the kitchen and once I'm there, I see Tripp washing dishes. No sign of Peeta though.

"Hey Tripp, you seen Madge today? I can't seem to find her."

"Oh, hey Gale. Glad to see you're out of the medical center. I saw Madge earlier but just for a minute. We were supposed to have lunch but she tracked me down at breakfast to tell me she wasn't going to make it today and we'd have to do it another time. You really haven't seen her all day?" He asks as he drops his dishrag into the sink, concern showing on his face.

"Haven't seen her since I fell asleep last night. My family hasn't seen her either. Thought maybe Peeta might have seen her but now I can't find him either."

"Peeta? He's down in the Defense Department with Katniss. Haymitch sent for him a little while ago."

"Did he say why?"

"Beats me. All I know is if you haven't seen her all day then something is definitely up. Want me to help you look for her? I can come back and wash theses later."

"Nah, I'll go on down to Defense. Maybe Peeta or Katniss have seen her. Thanks though. But hey, if you do happen to run into her, will you tell her I'm looking for her?"

"Sure thing."

"Thanks." I tell him as I leave the kitchen. It's probably always going to be awkward talking to him after how I acted when I heard him and Marah in the stairs that day. To give him credit though, he's a much better man about the whole thing than I am. I certainly wouldn't be offering to help me right now if I were him. I know it's only because he still loves her but I'm okay with that. So long as he never crosses that line, I'm okay with it. Marah I still hate though. That won't likely ever change.

I'm curious as to why Peeta would be in Defense. Something to do with Katniss maybe? It's weird. Defense isn't really Peeta's thing. I force myself to wait for the elevators again even though I know the stairs are faster. I feel weak and tired as it is and stairs aren't gonna help that.

In Defense, I head for Haymitch's office first but it's empty. Communications Bay is my next stop. And that's where I find Haymitch, Katniss and Peeta. No Madge though. Dammit, where are you Madge?

"Well lookie what the cat drug in." Haymitch says as he slurps from his mug, glancing up from his computer as I walk in the door.

"What's going on? Have you guys seen Madge? Can't find her anywhere."

"She's over in Medical. They just brought her mother in." Katniss explains.

"They did? The mission worked? What about her father and Mabel?"

"Not finished with it just yet. A few complications with getting Mr. Undersee but we're working on it. You should go check on Madge, see how her mother is." Katniss tells me quietly.

"What's wrong with the mission?"

"Just go be with Madge. There's too much going on right now for me to explain everything. I'll come find both of you later, I promise." She urges before turning her attention back to the screen in front of her.

Medical? She's over in the Medical Center? Was she there when I left earlier and I just missed her? A huge part of me is torn over whether or not I should stay and try to figure out what's going on or if I should go to Medical and find Madge. Ultimately, I decide finding Madge is most important. I can find out what's going on with her father's rescue later. I don't know what kind of condition her mother was brought here in and I know just seeing her mother will be very emotional for Madge. She never even got to say goodbye before they put her in that Capitol facility and that seems as if it were millions of years ago.

In the Medical Center, I inquire at the front desk about Mrs. Undersee and they tell me what room to find her in. She's listed as family only for visitors but thankfully, I'm now family and I'm able to go on back. I pause outside the cracked door of the room though and listen to Madge as she speaks quietly to her mother. Through the crack in the door I can see her, sitting in a chair with her back to me, next to her mother, holding her hand. Her mother appears to be asleep. Very still. But Madge is softly speaking to her so perhaps she isn't asleep.

"I have missed you so much. Every day, there's been something I wanted to tell you, something I wanted to share with you. So much has happened. I have so much I want to say that I don't even really know where to begin."

She pauses and I listen to see if her mother answers her but she doesn't. She's only still. Madge continues.

"I want you to know that I forgive you for the contract. I don't think it was a smart decision and I disagree with it completely but I've forgiven you because I know your intentions were out of love. I know you loved me so much that you couldn't bare the thought of me ending up like Maysilee. I understand your fears and I know you love me, so I forgive you for what you did."

Madge pauses again and I hear her sniffle. She's crying. My heart aches for her and I want nothing more than to go in and comfort her but I hold back because I can't interrupt this private moment. She's waited a very long time to be able to have this conversation, even if she's the only one doing the talking.

"The next thing I want you to know is that I in no way, was ever part of what Father and Mabel did to you. I'm so incredibly sorry that they betrayed you in that way. A huge part of my heart is always going to feel guilty for what happened. I should have known. I should have paid more attention as you got sicker and sicker. I didn't know that they were the reason you continued to get worse rather than better. I promise that if I'd ever known, if I'd ever thought for even a second that you were being poisoned, I would've stopped it. I would've found a way to help you, to keep you safe."

Again my heart aches for her. I had no idea the weight of the guilt she was still carrying around over what happened with her mother.

"Maybe this is ridiculous. I don't even know if you can hear me or if you can understand what I'm saying, all the things I'm trying to tell you." Madge sobs. I silently plead for her to be strong, to keep talking. She needs this, even if there isn't a response, she needs to get out what she's been holding inside.

"I can't imagine how scary it must have been for you as you felt yourself getting sicker and sicker. Did you know it was him? Did you know that he was behind everything that ailed you? I'm so sorry if you did. You deserved better than that. You deserved the right to trust the one you pledged your love too. I'm still angry with him for what he did. A part of me will probably always be angry. But I do forgive him because, like you, his actions, however horrific they may have been, were out of love for me and fear for my safety."

"You missed a lot while you were gone. Some bad, some good. The best thing you missed though, well, it was more than just a good thing. It was a great thing. I met someone. Someone truly incredible. Actually, I already knew him, or well, I thought I did anyway. But then I saw him differently and before I even knew what was happening, I was totally and completely in love with him. Really, wholeheartedly in love. It's Gale Hawthorne. Katniss's friend? Do you remember him at all?"

She waits as if waiting for an answer but it's long since become clear that her mother isn't going to respond. Whatever shape she's in, it's obvious she isn't able to speak or to move.

"There's more though. I don't just love him. I married him! You hear that? I'm married!" She says, her voice higher with excitement now.

"And it's the most glorious thing ever, being married, being in love with him. He's so wonderful, so perfect, incredibly handsome. You'd absolutely adore him, I just know you would. You would love how protective he is of me. Oh, and his family, they're just as wonderful as he is! They welcomed me right into their family, open armed, from day one."

I can't help but smile to myself as she brags on me and my family. We do love her, that's all true. And I can tell from the sound of her voice that she's smiling too.

"And I know we're awfully young to be married but the way the circumstances all unfolded for us, it just worked out better for us to be married. Wait, by circumstances I don't mean what it sounds like! We didn't have to get married, not like that. It wasn't because of a baby or anything like that at all. What I mean is, we got engaged and had planned to have a lengthy engagement but then we found out I was going into the games and decided we wanted to at least enjoy being married, even if it would only be for a short while. And well, I made it out of the games and now I get to spend the rest of my life with him."

"And don't worry about the games. I did okay. Never even had to kill anyone. I trained ahead of time, just in case. So I could sort of hold my own if I needed too. I had so much help too. Katniss, Gale and his family. Everyone wanted me to win, to make it out safe. There was a surprise help too. Tripp Krull, Lily Krull's son? Well he volunteered to go into the games alongside me. To protect me. Can you believe that? Turns out he loves me. Like really loves me. I don't think I've ever felt anything that was so awful and nice at the same time. I don't love him, not like that anyway and that of course is the part that made his volunteering all the more awful. But I love that he did such a selfless thing on my behalf. We're still friends, he made it out of the games too. We were rescued right out of the arena, the back up plan if you will. And now, we're here in 13. Safe and free from all the evils of the Capitol."

Madge gets really quiet for awhile and I peek back through the crack in the door to see what she's doing. She's laying her head down on her mother's bed. Only now do I see her mother's face fully. Her eyes are wide open but empty. Just glassy and still. She's either heavily medicated or this is what she's become. This could very well be how she is all the time.

I hear Madge sigh and see her raise her head back off the bed again. "I really wish I knew if you could hear me. Wish you could respond. But I am glad you're here. Can't tell you how good it feels to be able to hold your hand again, to see you again. I've missed you so, so much." Her voice is soft again.

"I think you should know that while you were rescued, another rescue was taking place to bring Father and Mabel back here as well. Please don't let that scare you. No one will let them hurt you. They wouldn't do that anymore anyway. But I promise you're safe here. They're probably already here in fact. Probably going through processing right now even."

It's the first time I've really even thought about what it would be like for all of Madge's family to be here at the same time. I never even stopped to wonder if she would be okay with the thought of her Mother being in the same place as Mabel and her Father again. A twinge of guilt runs through me because I should've thought about how that might be hard for her at first. Should've realized that it might be hard for all of them.

"I have a job now too. A real one. I work in a place called Processing and I help get people checked into 13 when they're brought here for the first time. It's only part time but it certainly makes me feel good to be able to contribute here. My husband Gale has a very important job working in the Defense Department. He helps rescue people and bring them back here to safety. He's sort of a hero of sorts. And brave. He's so brave."

She thinks of me as a hero? Admires my bravery? Man I love this girl so much. Here she is finally getting to talk to her mother after all this and what comes to her mind? Me and my bravery? Hearing her sit there and dote on me this way makes my heart soar.

"He's so much more than just brave though. He's…well, he's just everything. Did you know he taught me to swim? Out in the woods of 12, there's this magnificent lake that he took me too when we were dating and he actually taught me how to swim. Can you believe that? Me out in the woods of 12 learning how to swim?" She laughs a little as if the mere thought of this is funny. And I suppose in a way, she's right. There was definitely a time when picturing Madge Undersee out at the lake swimming would have made me laugh too. Back before I really knew her.

"I could probably go on and on forever about all the things that have changed since I last saw you. Things with me, things about life in general. And I will. I'll tell you every last thing that comes to my mind. I'll come see you every day. We'll sit and talk and I'll bring Gale too sometime. I want you to meet him. I'm going to go now so you can rest though. You've had a long day and that's probably what you need most right now is your rest."

I watch as Madge gets to her feet, leans over and kisses her mother's cheek. "I love you and I'm so happy you're safe now."

When Madge comes out of the room, she startles a bit to see me leaning against the wall outside her mother's doorway. Her eyes are bloodshot and watery. All of a sudden I question whether or not I should have been listening in on such a private moment but those questions vanish from my mind the instant I see her smile. She smiles amidst her tears and I lean down, kissing her forehead as I hold her face in my hands.

"She's here. She's really here." She whispers to me.

"I know." I whisper back. "I know."

_**A/N: I'm so sorry that it took me so long to get this chapter posted. I'm even sorrier to tell you all that it will probably be at least a week before my next update posts. I'm going on a week long vacation in a couple days and I don't know that I'll have much time for writing while I'm gone. I'll try and squeeze in time to write one more chapter before I leave but I may not have time. I'll try my best though!**_

_**And thanks again to all my readers and reviewers!**_


	35. Chapter 35

**Chapter 35**

(Gale POV)

"You were listening out here the whole time?" She asks after our kiss breaks.

"Not the whole time, but a lot. Didn't want to come in and interrupt you." I confess. She doesn't look as if it bothered her that I was listening but I still feel like I may have intruded. "Sorry. My original intention wasn't eavesdropping, I promise."

"It's okay. I don't mind that you heard me." She says, shaking her head and smiling a little.

"You know, to hear you tell it your way, you'd think I hung the moon." I tease as I smile down at her. Her face is splotchy from crying but there's a smile on her lips.

"Well didn't you?" She replies coyly, raising an eyebrow.

It's almost more than I can stand and I grab at her hips and pull her to me, leaning down to kiss her and temporarily forgetting about my very recent surgery and still very sore body. My body remembers though. There's a split second where all the air goes out of me and I feel a quick stab of pain shoot through my abdomen and I freeze, unable to move for a minute.

"Are you alright? Gale?" Madge asks in alarm, pulling back and studying my face.

I feel the pain start to subside and let myself breathe again. I shake my head at her. "Keep forgetting about that damn surgery. I'm fine. Just moved a little too abruptly there for a minute."

"Do we need to go see the medic?" She asks me, concern still evident all over her face.

"No, no. It's fine. I'm just supposed to be taking it easy and I got too excited." I explain as I run my hands up from her hips and hold her waist instead. "Really it's all your fault. You and your damn flirtatious comments. Making grown men forget they just had major surgery and all." I add teasingly.

She shoots me a look but it's a teasing one and she can't hide her laughter. "Well, Perhaps you should go on up to bed and get some rest. I'm going to go find out where my father's at; he must have arrived by now."

Her father. Right. There's a problem with that. "Um, I don't think he's back yet. Before I came here, I was in the Communications Bay and Katniss told me he wasn't back yet. Said she come tell us just as soon as she had any new information."

"Something's wrong isn't it? That's why he isn't back yet?"

"Not sure what any of the details are. I left before anyone had the time to fill me in. I was just trying to track you down because I hadn't seen you all day."

"Sorry about that. I found out my mother was on her way back and suddenly she was all I could focus on." Madge explains apologetically.

"It's okay. I'd have been the same way."

"Can we go over to Defense and see what they'll tell me about my father and Mabel? If you feel up to it, that is."

I'm exhausted and dying to lay down but I ignore that and nod at her. "Come on. Maybe they have some good news waiting for us." I tell her optimistically.

She doesn't reply but walks alongside me back over to Defense. Right as we're walking up on the Communications Bay, out comes Peeta, Katniss and Haymitch. None of them looking all that great.

"Hi, um, I just wanted to check and see if there was any news on my father and Mabel's return?" Madge asks them, voice fighting not to quiver.

"Let's take it in my office." Haymitch says gruffly.

We follow behind him and Katniss does too. I notice Peeta leaves though. Guess his part is all finished down here. In Haymitch's office, Madge and I sit down across from him and Katniss leans rolls her wheelchair over next to me.

"So here's the situation. Mabel is on her way back, probably going through processing as we speak. Your father, well, he isn't coming."

"Not coming?" Madge squeaks out.

"No."

My heart sinks for Madge and I squeeze her hand a little tighter. With tears in her eyes she waits for Haymitch to continue. To give her an explanation.

Katniss speaks first. " You see Madge, there was a complication with his part of the mission. One we couldn't have anticipated. President Snow didn't follow normal procedures when he found your father appearing to be dead in his cell. Normally, his body would be removed and sent for autopsy and then destroyed. That was the procedure that had always been followed." She pauses and looks at Madge who now has silent tears gliding down her cheeks.

"Well, this time, President Snow had a different protocol. One he decided on his own. He didn't send the body out for autopsy like he should've, like we'd expected. Instead, he kept it with him and used it to film a message." She continues to explain.

"He what?" I ask in horror.

Katniss's eyes shift to me and I shut my mouth. From the look on her face, this is hard enough for her to tell Madge without having me here interrupting her.

"He filmed a message to all of Panem and made it look as if he was the reason your father was now deceased. Used it to warn everyone of what would come from going against the Capitol."

"Well, it's still okay then. We'll just slip him another pill and try again. They have to transfer his body at some point." Madge offers up in suggestion.

Katniss shakes her head. "We can't do that. Not this time. He…he's gone Madge. Your father really passed away today."

"I don't understand." She chokes out.

"When Snow filmed that message, he had, well, his care of the body, it wasn't…he…" She tries to explain and finally looks over to Haymitch for help since she can't find the words.

"Snow hung your father's body up by a noose in the video. It killed him." Haymitch says.

Madge gasps and then begins to hyperventilate a little. I fight back my own tears and reach over, rubbing her back.

"If it helps at all, he wouldn't have felt a thing. It would've been completely painless for him in those last moments. The pill he'd taken would've blocked any pain at all." Katniss offers and I notice tears in her own eyes. She's seen the video. I can see it on her face. And no way in hell is Madge gonna be allowed to watch that video.

"But are you certain? Are you absolutely certain? It's not some trick or some mistake?" Madge asks amidst her tears.

"We're certain." Katniss says quietly. "I'm so terribly sorry, Madge."

"Thank you for your efforts. It means a lot to me that you were able to even attempt to rescue him. And thank you for safely bringing my mother and Mabel here." Madge says sounding very much like illusion Madge. The one that puts on a brave face and fakes it even when she's falling apart. She stands to leave and I follow behind her.

As we exit, I glance back at Haymitch and see him pouring another round of liquor into his mug. Katniss is rubbing her temples and her eyes are closed. This mission was difficult for the both of them and in their own way, I know they're feeling the loss of Mayor Undersee. But Madge, she's feeling it on a whole new level. One that Katniss and I are both familiar with ourselves.

We walk back to our unit in silence. Madge fights the tears until we get inside the door and then the floodgates break, tears pouring down, sobs echoing out as she buries her face in the pillow. I sit on the bed next to her and simply run my fingers through her hair, letting her cry it out. Occasionally, I make quiet shushing sounds, trying to soothe her pain. I know all too well though that nothing I can say or do in this moment will take away the pain her heart feels right now.

(Madge POV)

I hesitate outside her door. Mabel's door. I want to talk to her but my nerves are unsettled. I haven't seen her since that day in the courts and even then, I wasn't allowed to speak to her. Only saw her as she sat there on trial. And I need to let her know about my father. To let her know that he didn't survive the rescue attempt. I'm not even sure I'll be able to find the words. My own heart still aches so badly. Last night, I'd cried nearly the whole night through. Gale stay awake all night. Gently rubbing my back, my hair, trying to patiently comfort me any way he could. When I left this morning to come find Mabel, he'd offered to come with me but I knew I needed to do this on my own and I also knew he needed to get some rest. He hasn't even been home from the Medical Center for a full day yet and he's supposed to be taking it easy. He'd fought me on it a little but ultimately I think he knew I wanted to do this on my own and he respected that.

But now, I find myself out here, desperately trying to summon up courage. Talking to my mother had been easier. She's in a catatonic state as the medic called it and unable to respond. They honestly aren't able to even confirm if she can hear and understand what I was saying to her. It made it easier to really pour out my heart that way. Mabel however, isn't in a catatonic state. She's just fine. With her, the conversation will be harder because it won't be so one sided.

I take a deep breath and knock on the door. When it opens, my breath catches a bit in my throat at the sight of Mabel. She looks as if she's aged 20 years since I saw her last. Her hair is thinner, graying. Her cheeks and collarbones sunken in from the dramatic weight loss she suffered while imprisoned. Her eyes look weary and tired.

"Miss Madge!" She says, throwing her arms around me as soon as she sees me.

"Welcome to 13." I tell her, tears threatening to spill from my eyes as I hug her back.

"Come in, come in. Sit and let me have a look at you!" She exclaims as she takes my hand and leads me into her tiny room.

"How are you? Are you getting settled in alright?" I ask as we sit down on the bed.

"I'm fine. Just fine. I know I look plain frightening though, but I just need to gain a little weight back and I'll be good as new." She tells me waving herself off as if she doesn't matter, as if this is all about me. Her hand reaches up and I feel her fingers run over my facial scars. "Oh dear, what on earth happened here?"

"Just a little remnant of my time in the games is all." I say with a sigh.

"You were injured?"

"Yes and no. This wasn't from a fight with another tribute. It was an encounter with some Capitol creature creation. I actually didn't have to kill anyone while I was in there."

"I'm so glad to hear that! I knew you'd been rescued from the arena but I didn't know anything of your time in the games or what transpired thereafter. All I knew was you vanished out of that arena and not a soul had heard from you since. I was so worried."

"I've been here in 13 the whole time. Me and all the other tributes rescued from the arena. And our families too. All the Hawthornes are here, I know Hazelle will be glad to see you again."

"Madge honey, I'm so terribly sorry that you had to be dragged into the whole court mess with your father and I. Neither of us had any idea they would bring you into it. I know that was difficult but I'm proud of you and how you handled yourself on the stand that day."

"It was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do."

"Your father hated seeing you on that stand. Nearly broke his heart but he was so very proud of how you handled yourself. Have you been able to see him yet? Is he in good health? No one would tell me a thing last night when I got here."

"Mabel, about my father…" I begin as I take a deep breath in. "there was a complication in rescuing him yesterday and he didn't survive. He won't be coming here to 13." My voice cracks and I fight to hold back the tears I know are coming.

Her hand goes up to cover her mouth and tears brim in her eyes. "Oh honey!"

I let my tears fall and we fall into an embrace, both of us mourning the loss of part of our family. Mabel may not be a blood relative and she's still family. She's been a part of my family practically all my life. News of my father's death hurts her in nearly the same way that it hurts me. We stay like this, clinging to one another as we cry, for quite some time. We cry until our tears run dry but even that doesn't heal the pain.

"And your mother? What do you know of her?" Mabel asks fearfully.

"She's here. Arrived a little before you did yesterday. I saw her last night."

"And how is she?"

I shake my head. "She's alive but in what they call a catatonic state. Her eyes are open but glossed over and she doesn't move or speak. The medics aren't certain if she can even hear us speaking to her or if she's aware of what's going on."

She looks down at her lap, almost as if she's hanging her head in shame. "I'm so sorry, Miss Madge. I can't tell you enough how sorry I am."

"Long since forgiven. I do think you should go and see her yourself though. Apologize to her on your own."

"I agree. And I will."

"I think you'll like it here in 13. There's lots of equality here, no social divisions."

"I was flipping through the handbook when you arrived. I have orientation in a little while. Actually, I hate to go but I'm afraid I'll be late otherwise." She says as she glances at the clock on the wall.

"Of course. Come on, I'll walk you over to orientation. This place can be a little confusing at first. The tour they give you today will help everything make more sense." I say as I pull myself to my feet.

I walk her down to where they hold orientation and along the way I show her the stairs as an alternative to waiting in line for the elevators during peak times of the day. Once she's in orientation, I swing by the cafeteria to see if I can grab an apple or something since I missed the scheduled breakfast time.

I find an empty cafeteria but I know there's probably still someone on back in the kitchen so I go and poke my head in back there.

"Hello, anyone here?" I call out.

"Madge?" I hear from way in the back and then I see Tripp coming around a corner, wiping his hands on a dish towel.

"Oh, hi Tripp! What are you doing here, I thought you worked dinner shift now?"

"I do. But Marah wasn't feeling well this morning so we traded shifts. Between you and me though, I think she's faking just so she can sleep in. She hates mornings." He explains jokingly.

"I see. Well, I'm glad you're here. I missed breakfast this morning and I was hoping I could grab an apple or something to go?"

"I can do you one better than that. How about I cook you something instead? If you have time, that is?"

"Won't you get in trouble?" I ask in a low voice.

"Nah, I'm the only one still here. Supervisor's gone and everything. We've got at least an hour before anyone arrives to start prepping , I didn't eat breakfast yet myself"

"Well, it is tempting…" I say as I bite my lip. My stomach growls audibly and I instinctively place my hand over my stomach. "I, um, sort of missed dinner last night too."

"It's decided then. Come on." He says, taking my elbow and pulling me towards the prep area of the kitchen. "So what'll it be? Eggs and toast? French toast? Bland oatmeal with raisins?

I laugh. "French toast would be great if it isn't too much trouble."

"French toast it is. Wanna help?"

"I don't know. It's been awhile since I cooked."

"Then you're long over due. Here." He says as he hands me an apron.

I take it and tie it around my waist.

"Here, whisk these eggs while I get some vanilla and cinnamon." He says as he hands me a bowl will a few eggs in it and a whisk. I get to work on the eggs. I have to admit, this feels pretty good. Cooking again. I'd forgotten just how much I liked it.

"That should be good." He says as he takes the bowl and puts it on the counter.

"Now what?"

"Now we add the stuff that makes it taste so good. A dash of vanilla, a little cinnamon and a splash of milk. And now you whisk again."

"I forgot how much I missed this you know."

"Hanging out with me or the cooking?"

"I was referring to the cooking but now that you mention it, probably both."

"Well, this is fun for me too. I don't get to cook just anything I want anymore. And I've certainly missed your company as well."

"So how do you like it here in 13? Do you wish you were still back in 12?" I ask, making conversation as we dip slices of bread into the egg mixture.

"Overall, I'd say I like it. It's easy here. Not much to worry about. Miss my friends. Not too many of them made it here in the final 12 rescue. And I miss the café a lot. Kinda always thought it'd be mine one day, you know? What about you?"

"I know what you mean. I miss certain things but I'm happier here because I'm safe. Nothing like safety."

"Hey, what happened to you yesterday? Gale was by here looking for you, said he hadn't seen you all day." He asks as he flips the bread in the skillet.

"I was with my mother. They brought her here yesterday. Mabel too."

"Madge that's fantastic!"

I nod as I swallow back tears.

"It is fantastic isn't it?"

"I'm beyond thrilled to see my mother again. She's very sick but it's good to know she's here where caring medics and doctors will take care of her. And Mabel's fine. Underweight and weak but overall in good health."

"Then what's wrong? You don't seem as happy as I thought you'd be." He asks studying me questioningly.

"My…my father passed away. They were trying to bring him here too and it didn't work out."

"Oh Madge!" He says as he puts down the spatula he's holding and hugs me. It's a brief hug. Comforting, friendly.

"Thanks. If it's all the same to you, I'd really rather not talk about it. I've cried about all the tears I can handle right now and was kind of enjoying the distraction of cooking."

"Well then cook we shall. Here, you keep flipping this every minute or so and I'll be right back." He says as he shoves the spatula in my hand.

"Where are you going?" I ask.

"You just focus on not burning that toast." He calls back as he disappears into a cooler.

When he comes back he has cream and sugar and more vanilla. He begins to whisk it in a bowl and it's then that I realize he's making whipped cream. My mouth literally waters.

"I think this toast is finished." I tell him.

"Clean plates are over there. Forks too." He says as he jerks his head to the side.

I retrieve the forks and plates and come back over and flip two slices on each of the plates. When I'm finished, he sprinkles them with powdered sugar and then adds a dollop of the whipped cream to each stack.

"I hate to break it to you but we don't have any strawberries. I checked the cooler but the only fruits we have right now are apples and oranges, neither of which make for good French toast toppings." He says as he hands me my plate.

"No, this is perfect."

"Wanna go sit at a table or eat back here?"

"Here's good." I tell him as I hop up on the counter. I shovel a forkful into my mouth and close my eyes, savoring the sweetness of it. "Tripp, this is hands down, the best breakfast I have ever had. Seriously, it's out of this world!"

He laughs. "Well, I didn't cook it by myself. You oughta give yourself some of that credit."

We laugh a little, chat a little and enjoy our breakfast. I'm glad Tripp is here in 13. Glad the two of us are able to be friends. For just a little while, I manage to ignore the grief and sadness of my father's death. When we're finished, I help him wash up the dishes then head back home to check on Gale. I grab an apple on my way out just in case he's hungry. I know he didn't have dinner or breakfast either but I also know he hasn't much of an appetite right now so he might not even want it but I bring it just in case. Hopefully, he's rested some.

I find him sleeping soundly and just the sight of him resting so peacefully makes me want to take a nap as well. I quietly slip off my shoes and pants and climb under the covers. I nuzzle up next to him, being mindful not to hurt the side where he still has stitches. I'm just about asleep when I feel his hand begin to run up and down my back, down over the curve of my hips.

"You are supposed to be resting." I whisper to him.

"I was resting. But now I'm not. Right now, I just want you." He whispers back as I feel his lips graze over my ear and down onto my jaw.

"Mmmm." Is all I manage to utter as his hands find my thighs and lips find my neck. I move to unfasten his pants and then regain my mind a bit. He isn't well enough yet to be doing this.

"Gale, we can't do this. Not yet. You could reinjure yourself." I tell him as I gently pull back.

He groans. "Seriously?"

"Fraid so." I tell him.

"Madge, it's fine, I'm fine."

I put my hand on his chest and look up at him. "No, not yet. We can't risk it. When the stitches come out, we'll pick this up where we left off. For now, you rest."

"Fine." He pouts, laying back on the pillows. I notice his bag of medicines on the night table and it occurs to me that he likely hasn't bothered to take them.

"Have you taken your medicines yet today?" I ask, reaching over him to grab the bag.

"Don't need em. Not in any pain."

"This one has to be taken even if you aren't in pain. It's different." I remind him as I hold up the bottle of pills that are supposed to help fight off infections.

"You planning on babying me through this whole recovery?" He grumbles as he takes the pills I hold out for him.

"I think I'm going to have too." I tease as I hand him the apple to eat with his medicine. He takes it and gives me a pouty scowl. I give him a kiss on the forehead in response and from that, a smile sneaks out from behind his pout, unable to keep hidden. He leans forward, stealing another kiss. It's only seconds before I feel it deepen and have to pull away again.

"Rest up my love, we've got our whole lives for that." I tell him as I tap my fingertip against his lips. And I mean it. We really do have our whole lives ahead of us. A whole future waiting for us to experience it.

_**A/N: Thanks so much to all of you for patiently waiting for this chapter to post while I was on vacation! I should have the next and final (Gasp!)chapter posted in the next day or so! **_


	36. Epilogue

**Epilogue**

(Madge POV)

"I think we're all set." I tell Gale as I stick the last of four candles in a pink cake. It's Amelia's third birthday and we're getting ready to celebrate. Just a small family celebration. Nothing too fancy but enough to make her feel special.

"Posy should be by with her in a the next half hour or so. Ma and everyone eltoo just before that." He says as he finishes hanging the last of the pink streamers.

I look around and smile. We've tried to brighten up the room and make it cheery. I charmed streamers out of Haymitch. Well, charmed him into finding a way to get them from the Capitol and smuggle them back for me. When I was a little girl, I once had a birthday party with streamers and I remember thinking it made the whole room look like a fairy tale. So, about a month ago, I decided Amelia should have the very same for her birthday this year.

Peeta helped with the cake. A vanilla flavored cake with fluffy, pink frosting and sugary sprinkles. And it smells downright heavenly! I know Amelia will love it. She loves just about anything sweet and between Peeta and Tripp, she's constantly getting spoiled with cookies and cupcakes.

Hazelle helped with the gift. I had an idea but I knew I'd need some expert help. I wanted to make her a nightgown. Actually, I wished I could have made her a dress but because of the dress code guidelines, it wasn't possible. A nightgown however was an option and the next best thing. So we got some fabric and ribbons and every night after I'd gotten Amelia to sleep, Hazelle would over and we'd spend a little time sewing one for her. I think she'll love it. It's pink. Her favorite color. And we used to the ribbons to trim the hem and put little bows on the sleeves. She's my little girly girl and I can't wait to watch her face light up when she opens it. And Hazelle loved making it for her. I think she misses Posy being so small and I know she outright adores her first grandchild. And I kind of enjoyed having the time alone with Hazelle and for her to be able to begin teaching me to sew.

Rory and Rebekah are giving her a storybook. It isn't new of course but it's full of short stories about princesses and I know she'll love it. They found it in the storage center, that's where Rory works. Someone left it when coming through processing years ago apparently and when he saw it, he got permission from his supervisor to take it for her. Rory and Rebekah have just got engaged about a month ago. They're planning to wed sometime before Christmas this year. I'm beyond thrilled for the two of them and I know Rebekah will make a stunning bride for Rory.

Posy's gift is my favorite though. She made her a rag doll. Complete with yarn hair and the cutest little dress and apron. She worked on it for nearly two months. Doing her best to make it perfect. It's touching and brings warm memories of all those years ago when I myself gave a doll to Posy. Sometimes I have a hard time believing that Posy is as old as she is now. Fifteen this year. And I couldn't possibly ask for a better Aunt for my Amelia. Posy and she are practically inseparable. I could sit and watch them together for hours. And sometimes, I do.

I don't know yet what it is that Vick's giving her. He said it was to be a surprise. My guess is it's something to do with science in some way or another. He works as a teacher now, teaching science and his passion for it really shines through. I can't wait for Amelia to be old enough to be one of his pupils.

Tripp and his wife Avonlea are joining us as well. They've been married for three years now. Avonlea is such a peach of a girl and it makes me very happy that they found each other. She came here as part of a rescue mission and it was easy to see that it was love at first sight for the two of them. She was assigned to work in the kitchen and ended up on the same shift as Tripp. Before they knew what'd hit them, they were head over heels in love. Married within a year and they have a little one on the way. Due about the same time as my next little one. Sometime in January.

Gale and I are hoping this one's a boy, that way we'll have one of each. This will be our second. One closer to having that house full of children that we always talked about. We waited a long time before getting pregnant. Our whole relationship had been a whirlwind and there was something to be said for taking our time and savoring a few years with it being just the two of us. But the minute Gale and I laid eyes on Amelia, we knew that we couldn't wait to have as many as possible. I'd heard that the love you feel for your own child is unlike that of any other comparison but I always thought that was some sort of polished up exaggeration. It isn't. Not at all.

Gale and I are just as in love as we ever were. Married nearly ten years now. He still works in the Defense Department and I stay home with Amelia. But I'll go back to work next year when she's four and starts in the preschool program. I've loved being able to spend so much time with her but I'm excited for her to go off to preschool and experience that too. We're so very, very lucky that she was born here in 13 and not in 12. Here, she'll always be safe and she'll have much more opportunity to learn and experience life than she ever would have above ground in 12.

I've learned to accept the fact that Panem isn't likely to change it's ways. Not anytime soon anyway. Snow is still the same as he always was. Manipulative and Coniving. Never up to any good. They resumed the games the year following my escape. Part of me had hoped and prayed that they'd never hold them again. But, they did and they do. Every year without fail. Senseless and brutal. There haven't been anymore arena rescues though. Not sure we'd be able to break in again anytime soon. Not with all the security measures that were added. I don't watch the reapings or the games. Gale occasionally has too because of his work but I never do. And our daughter will never have to watch them either.

My mother passed away about five years ago. She went peacefully and I know she's in a better place now. Her poor mind and body were just to ravaged by the poisons to ever recover. The doctors do tell me that she didn't appear to have been in pain in her last few years of life. She remained catatonic, never waking from what felt like a deep, deep slumber. Didn't matter though. I came to see her nearly every day. I'd sit for hours on end just talking to her, telling her about my life. Gale came too sometimes.

Cupid must have been hiding here in 13 because in addition to Rory and Tripp finding love here, so did Mabel. She met and married a wonderful man named Harlan. He works in mechanics and met her when he came to fix a sewing machine in the sewing department where she'd taken a job. Like Mabel, Harlan had married once before but sadly, his wife had passed as well. They were a good fit for one another, as if cut from the same cloth. Love is a good look on her too. I think it makes her smile in a way I'd never seen before.

I still have days where I miss my father so much it hurts. I think there will always be days like that. When that happens I try to find comfort in knowing that he loved me more than anything and that he died knowing I was safe from the clutches of President Snow. He died no longer having to worry about my future.

And I still have so much future laying before me. A future with Gale and with Amelia and my future children. And one day grandchildren, maybe even great grandchildren. When I'm old and gray and at the end of my life, I'm confident I'll be able to look back over my life and be pleased with what I've made of it. My own little happily-ever-after.

A/N: **I want to thank each and everyone of you who have taken time to read my little trilogy here. And a special thanks to those of you who've taken extra time to review my work or send me private messages. You have no idea how motivating your commentary has been for me! A few of you have inquired as to if I would be writing any new stories now that this is finished so I wanted to address that. For now, this is all the fanfiction that I plan to write. The only exception would be a possible one-shot or two that I may do but no specific plans right now. My next thing will be working on my own original story over at fictionpress. It isn't started yet but is going to be a love story set in the late 1920's/early 1930's. So if you love my writing, you can always find me over at fictionpress for now! **


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